Selby Santa (2 page)

‘Goodness!’ Dr Trifle said after Denis Dorset had left. ‘I knew I wasn’t exactly telling the truth but I didn’t know I was breaking the law.’

‘Why didn’t you talk to me first?’ Mrs Trifle sighed. ‘I hope this invention of yours fools everyone.’

‘I hope so, too.’

‘That goes for me, too,’ Selby thought.

That night, Selby dreamed that he was flying Dr Trifle’s sleigh and that it went out of control and crashed. He woke up suddenly.

‘That was
soooo
scary
’ he thought. ‘I hate nightmares.’

Selby would have gone right back to sleep if it hadn’t been for the tiniest of tiny sounds coming from behind the house.

‘I wonder what that could be?’ he said to himself. He peeped out through the back curtain. ‘It’s Denis Dorset! That sneaky, creepy guy! Hey, he’s right next to the Super Santa Sleigh Simulator! Now he knows Dr Trifle’s secret! I’ve got to stop him before he does something to it!’

Selby was out in the backyard in a flash, barking his loudest bark and showing his teeth. Denis ran towards the back fence with Selby nipping at him.

‘Good boy, good boy,’ Denis whispered as he leaped over the fence. ‘Stupid mutt.’

‘That guy was up to no good,’ Selby thought, as he went back inside and lay down again. ‘He was trying to ruin Dr Trifle’s invention. Lucky I chased him away just in time. Okay, so he knows the secret now but he can’t tell anyone because then he’d have to say that he sneaked into our backyard — and that’s against the law. I should have given him a great big bite on the bum.’

The next morning, Dr Trifle started out early to drive to the city and Mrs Trifle went to work as usual. By the time she returned, Dr Trifle was
back, the Santa suit was on the Robot Santa and everything was ready.

‘People have been coming here from all over the country!’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘The whole main street is already full of kids waiting to see your Santa. The shop owners are really happy. Parents keep buying and buying and buying. Oh, I do hope your invention is ready to fly.’

‘It is,’ Dr Trifle said. ‘And it’s time to send it on its way!’

‘Oh, this is so exciting!’ Selby thought.

Within a minute, Santa and his Robot Reindeer were flying in circles over the house.

‘That looks fantastic!’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘Just make sure it stays way up in the air and then no one will know it’s not the real Santa. Is it loaded with lollies?’

‘It certainly is,’ Dr Trifle said. ‘Watch, I’ll now activate the Robot Santa Lolly-Flinging Mechanism.’

With the flick of a switch, Santa’s arm went into the lolly bag and flung a handful of lollies down into the backyard.

‘There, perfect,’ Dr Trifle said. ‘Now off he goes.’

Suddenly, Santa threw down another handful of lollies and then another.

‘You’d better save the lollies till he’s over the town,’ Mrs Trifle said.

‘There’s something wrong,’ Dr Trifle said, as another lot of lollies whistled down. ‘I turned the switch off but he’s still chucking them.’

Santa’s arm was moving at blinding speed now, peppering the backyard with lollies, each lot coming down faster and faster.

‘Turn it off!’ Mrs Trifle screamed, ducking for cover.

‘I can’t! Something’s terribly wrong!’

Suddenly Santa’s lolly-throwing arm came crashing down, followed by his other arm. And now Santa’s head tumbled off his body and smashed into the grass. Selby jumped into a bush as the rest of the Robot Santa hit the side of the pool and splintered into pieces. Dr Trifle quickly landed the sleigh.

‘What went wrong?’ Mrs Trifle asked.

‘I don’t know. It worked perfectly yesterday.’

‘I know what happened,’ Selby thought. ‘That dirty Denis fiddled with the controls last night! I thought I’d stopped him in time, but I didn’t.’

‘This is terrible,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘Santa is … dead.’

‘And there’s no time to fix him,’ Dr Trifle said. ‘I could fly in the sleigh myself but I’m too heavy. It would never get off the ground.’

Mrs Trifle looked at her husband and shook her head.

‘What can we do?’ she said with a big sigh. ‘We’ll have to go to town and tell everyone that Santa isn’t coming after all. The kids are going to be very sad.’

‘I’m terribly sorry,’ Dr Trifle said. ‘I never should have started this. It’s all my fault.’

‘It’s all Denis’s fault,’ Selby thought, as he watched the Trifles drive away. ‘He’s ruined everything. And now Santa’s not going to come and Dr Trifle will be in big trouble. I’m just going to have to tell the Trifles what really happened. I’ll have to finally give away my secret and ruin my life forever.’

Selby paced back and forth, thinking about what he would tell the Trifles.

‘
Denis Dorset sneaked into the yard last night and
— No, hang on, I’d better tell them about me first because they’re going to get a big
surprise when I start talking. I’ll say,
I may only be a dog but
— Hmmm, they already know I’m a dog. How about,
You may be surprised to hear this but one day I was watching TV and suddenly I could understand everything people were saying
? — I don’t like that. I’ll get right into it.
I’m a dog, I can talk, so get over it. Last night when you were sleeping
— No, that doesn’t sound right either. What am I going to do?’

Selby paced faster and faster, his thoughts bouncing around in pieces in his brain. Suddenly some of them came together.

‘I don’t have to give away my secret!’ he cried. ‘And Dr Trifle doesn’t have to get into trouble! Selby Santa to the rescue!’

Selby jumped into the Santa suit, gathered up the lollies and in a flash he was sitting in the sleigh. He pushed the ON button on the controls and eight great whooshes of air blasted back at him.

‘Here goes!’ he cried as he roared across the lawn and then, with a twiddle of the toggle, shot up into the air.

‘Hey! It’s working! I’m flying!’ he screamed in his brain.

Selby tore through the air like a rocket, going higher and higher.

‘This is wonderful!’ he cried. ‘Now I know what it must be like for the real Santa! Ooops! It is kind of bumpy though.’

Selby’s sleigh headed for the centre of Bogusville as the air got bumpier and bumpier.

‘I don’t like this,’ he said to himself. ‘I thought it would all be smooth!’

Lollies flew out with every bump and then there was one super big bump, which sent the controls flying out of Selby’s paws. Now the sleigh was completely out of control, spiralling downwards and then upwards again. One more big bump and Selby flew out of the seat.

‘Oh, no!’ he cried, as he clung to the bottom of the sleigh. ‘Oh, woe woe woe! I can’t hold on any longer.’

In a second, Selby was tumbling through the air. His whole life flashed in front of his eyes. He remembered his first Christmas, just after the Trifles picked him up from the RSPCA. He remembered his next Christmas and the next and every present he ever got.

‘I’ve had my last prezzie ever,’ he whimpered. ‘I’m a done dog.’

But Selby wasn’t done. It was a Christmas tree that saved him. Not a Christmas tree with lights and decorations but a big pine tree in Bogusville Reserve. Selby hit the top and then bounced from one branch to the next, getting slower and slower till he landed softly on the ground.

‘I’m alive!’ Selby thought. ‘But now I’m really going to have to tell the Trifles.’

It was a scratched and bruised dog who limped his way home. As Selby lay waiting for his owners, he practised the words he would speak the moment they came in the door.

He heard them coming.

He cleared his throat.

The door opened.

‘I’m sorry. You are the dearest, most wonderful people in the world and I just did something very silly. I tried to be Santa and I crashed the sleigh. Okay, so it was Denis’s fault because he ruined the controls. I should have told you about it but I didn’t. I tried to fix things myself. I don’t deserve to be your pet.’

Dr and Mrs Trifle’s mouths were open as Selby was about to speak these words.

‘Something’s wrong,’ he thought. ‘Why are they smiling like that?’

‘Selby!’ Mrs Trifle cried, picking him up and giving him a big hug. ‘The most wonderful thing happened tonight!’

‘It was like magic!’ Dr Trifle added. ‘The real Santa flew over Bogusville and dropped lollies! He must have known that my invention didn’t work.’

‘Hey, that was me!’ Selby thought. ‘They saw me!’

‘You should have seen the looks on the kids’ faces,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘We all heard him saying
Ho ho ho
. What a night! The magic of Christmas was really alive. Everybody felt it!’

‘Almost everyone,’ Dr Trifle said. ‘Denis Dorset didn’t seem very pleased.’

‘He’s going to be even less pleased when he gets back to Poshfield,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘Didn’t you hear? His new helicopter was destroyed.’

‘Destroyed?’

‘Yes. It was sitting at Poshfield Airport when something came shooting right out of the sky and crashed into it. They think it must have
been a comet. The whole thing is burned to a crisp. So I guess Denis won’t be arriving in his helicopter tomorrow. Of course, after seeing the real Santa, the kids won’t want to see him in his silly Santa suit anyway.’

Selby struggled not to smile.

‘Oh joy! Oh joy!’ he thought. ‘Oh joyful day!’

‘Speaking of Santa and sleighs, I’d better start taking apart that useless invention of mine,’ Dr Trifle said as he opened the back curtains. ‘Hmmm, that’s strange. I’m sure it was here when we left the house.’

‘Gulp,’ Selby gulped. ‘Oh well, I guess you could say the magic of Christmas strikes again.’