Sentence of Marriage (49 page)

All those things I was going to do. I was going to be a teacher. I was going to live in Auckland. I even believed Jimmy when he said he’d take me to Australia. Plays to see, fancy clothes to wear. None of it’s going to happen now
. She turned her back on the sea and sat down on a convenient stump to wait for her dress to dry. A tiny rifleman fluttered about in the grass near her feet, hunting for the insects Amy had disturbed.

Half an hour later she saw a man coming up the track to her house. He was nearly at the farmhouse gate before she recognised the tall, slightly stooped figure of Charlie Stewart. Her heart gave a lurch. It would take something serious to make Charlie visit her father; she could not remember his ever coming to the house before.
He must be really annoyed about me. I’ll be in trouble now
. For a moment her heart beat faster, then she shook her head over her own foolishness.
It doesn’t matter. Things couldn’t get any worse than they already are
.

August 1884

When the food stores had been put away, Jack waited while Susannah poured tea for them both and sat down opposite him.

‘You haven’t read the letter from your ma yet,’ he said, gesturing to the unopened envelope that lay near her hand.

‘It’s not from Mother, it’s from Constance. I don’t like reading in the buggy, it’s so bumpy.’ She opened the envelope and read quickly. Jack saw a small smile of satisfaction on her face. She folded the closely-written pages and put them back in the envelope.

‘Good news?’ he asked.

‘Yes, I think it might be. I’ll have to wait and see.’

Jack had too little interest in the doings of Susannah’s sister to bother pressing for a less evasive answer. He helped himself to a biscuit from one of Amy’s cake tins and slurped at his tea.

They both looked up startled at a heavy rap on the door. ‘I didn’t hear anyone ride up,’ Susannah said as she went to open the door. When Charlie was revealed in the doorway, Jack was more surprised than ever. ‘Oh. Good morning, Mr Stewart,’ Susannah said. ‘Can I do something for you?’

‘It’s your husband I want to see, not you,’ Charlie said stiffly. He still had a Scottish accent despite having spent all his adult life far from Scotland, and his voice had an oddly rusty sound, as if from lack of use.

‘I’m here,’ Jack said. He got to his feet, wondering what Charlie had come to complain about. Some nonsense about wandering stock or suchlike, no doubt. As if he didn’t have enough worries over his womenfolk without Charlie annoying him.

When Jack reached the doorway Susannah moved a little to one side. Jack knew she was trying to leave the room as quickly as possible without being too obviously rude.

‘It’s about your girl,’ Charlie said. Susannah stopped in her tracks and flashed a look of alarm at Jack.

‘What about Amy?’ Jack asked, a warning note in his voice.

‘I saw her this morning, by my boundary fence. It wasn’t hard to see the state she’s in.’

‘I told her not to let anyone see her,’ Susannah said to Jack. ‘It’s not my fault.’

‘She’s not got a husband, has she?’ Charlie asked, ignoring Susannah.

‘I’ll thank you to keep your nose out of my family troubles,’ Jack said coldly.

‘And she’s not likely to get one, not in that state.’

‘What’s it to do with you?’ Jack growled.

‘I’ll take her.’

There was absolute silence in the room while Jack wondered if he had imagined what Charlie had just said. ‘What?’ he said at last.

‘I’ll marry your girl, if you want. I’ll give her a home and a decent name. I’ll not take the bas—bairn,’ he corrected himself, ‘I’m not giving another man’s child my name. But I’ll take her.’

‘You?’ Jack said in amazement. ‘You think I’d give Amy to you? I’d sooner—’

‘Jack, dear, don’t be hasty,’ Susannah cut in. ‘Mr Stewart has made a perfectly reasonable suggestion, the least you can do is be polite to him. Won’t you come in, Mr Stewart, and have a cup of tea with us?’

‘No, I won’t,’ said Charlie. ‘I’ve said what I came to say. I’ll come back tomorrow morning when you’ve had time to think about it and hear your answer.’

‘You don’t need to wait till then to hear what I think of it.’

‘Jack,’ Susannah said warningly, putting her hand on his arm. ‘We’ll see you tomorrow, then, Mr Stewart.’ Charlie nodded to them, looked thoughtful for a moment, then as though he had just dredged some recollection of polite behaviour from deep in his memory he tipped his hat to Susannah. She closed the door on the sight of his retreating back.

‘Did you ever hear such cheek?’ Jack said in disgust. ‘He thought I’d give my daughter to him. Him! What did you bother being so polite to him for?’

‘Because I think you should consider things properly before you fly off the handle. No, be quiet and listen for a minute,’ she said, raising a hand to silence his exclamation. ‘I know he’s not the sort of husband you hoped Amy would have, but that was when she was still likely to get one at all. No one will ever want her, we’ve already discussed that, and then out of the blue she gets a proper marriage proposal. I don’t think you should turn it down without giving Amy a chance at some happiness.’

‘Happiness? With Charlie?’

‘Yes, with Charlie. Why not? He must be prepared to look after her, or he wouldn’t offer for her. What’s so terrible about the idea?’

‘He must be nearly thirty years older than her, for a start. And that farm of his is only a hundred acres, that’s barely enough to support himself. Anyway, he’s a sour, bad-tempered so-and-so.’

‘Right,’ Susannah said briskly. ‘One thing at a time, then. Of course he can support her, even if his farm’s not nearly as big as yours. He must have plenty of food, it’s a farm, after all. Amy wouldn’t take much keeping.’

‘What about nice things for her? I always hoped she’d marry someone with a good, big farm so she could have a decent life, not wear herself out like her ma did. A man of twenty-five or so, with his farm well established and a good house on it. Charlie’ll never buy her nice dresses and things.’

‘But she’s not going to marry someone like that, is she?’ Susannah said in a tone of utter reasonableness. ‘A man like that doesn’t need to take a wife who’s been soiled, he can pick and choose. It’s only someone like Charlie, whom no one’s got much time for, who’d consider her. And I don’t think he’s as sour as you make him out to be. He’s not a good mixer, that’s all. With a sweet little wife like Amy, I think you’d be surprised at the change in him. He must be fond of her already, to offer for her. And you’d like Amy to live close to you, wouldn’t you? If she’d married properly, she might have to go and live miles away. I miss my parents dreadfully, I’m sure Amy would miss you, too.’

She made it sound so convincing that Jack could feel his certainty slipping away. ‘He’s still thirty years older than her,’ he tried.

‘I’d say it’s nearer twenty-five years.’ Susannah smiled rather wistfully at him. ‘Jack, that’s only a little more than the gap between you and I. I know we’ve had our differences lately, but I’ve never, ever thought you were too old for me.’

Jack cleared his throat to cover the conflicting emotions Susannah’s last remark aroused. ‘I never thought of it that way,’ he admitted. ‘I suppose he’s not as old as all that.’ He frowned. ‘I still don’t like it. I’d rather keep her here.’

‘And deny her the only chance she’s ever going to have to be mistress of her own home? She’s always resented me for taking over this house, and I suppose I can’t blame her, really. She was only a child then, but she thought she was running it herself. What do you think will happen when you and I are gone? It’ll be John’s house then, and John’s wife running things. No one will take much notice of Amy. She’ll just be the one who couldn’t get a husband because she’d been shamed. It seems a hard thing to condemn a girl of fifteen to, just because the man who proposes to her isn’t as fine as you wanted.’

Jack was moved by the bleakness of the picture Susannah had created. ‘That would be hard on a woman,’ he admitted. He fastened on the missing piece of the jigsaw. ‘What about the child, though? He says he won’t take the child.’

Susannah gave a deep sigh. ‘Yes, that’s sad. It would all be perfect if he’d accept the baby. But you can’t really expect him to, can you? The law would say it was his child. If it’s a boy, Charlie would have to see the farm he’s sweated and slaved over go to another man’s son. That’s not fair, is it?’

Jack mulled this over. ‘There’s sense in that, I suppose. One more child wouldn’t make any difference here, anyway.’

‘What do you mean, Jack?’ Susannah asked, her eyes suddenly wide.

‘Well, we’d say it was ours. No one would think anything of it, you’ve got two little ones already. If you stayed home from now until the child comes the nurse is the only one outside the family who’d need to know it was Amy’s and not yours.’

‘Jack!’ Susannah looked at him in horror. ‘How could you even think of something so cruel?’

‘Don’t start that nonsense. It’s not cruel to ask you to look after three children. I know you’re not keen on having babies, but you don’t have to bear this one, just bring it up.’

‘No, I don’t mean that.’ Susannah was still looking at him as though he had said something monstrous. ‘How do you think Amy would feel, having to pretend her own child was only her brother or sister? Living next door, she’d see it every week, but she’d never be able to claim it as her own. To hear her child call me mother instead of her? I think that would break her heart.’

‘Wouldn’t it be even harder for her never to see the child at all?’

Susannah smiled at him. ‘That’s a strange thing for a farmer to say. I remember when I first came here, the cows were bellowing for their calves. They sounded so miserable, I was quite upset. But you told me they’d forget about the calf after a few days as long as it was out of sight, then they’d have another one next year and be as happy as ever. It’s the same for Amy. She can’t keep this baby if she marries Charlie, so the best thing in the world would be to send it away so she’ll never see it, then for her to have another baby as soon as possible. A baby she could be proud of instead of ashamed. That’s the only way you’re ever going to see her happy again. You want her to be happy, don’t you?’

‘Of course I do. If that’s what would make her happy… I don’t know. It doesn’t seem right, somehow.’

‘What about giving her the chance to decide? Let her choose whether she wants to accept Charlie or not. I think she has the right to know she’s been offered for.’

Jack tugged absently at a corner of his beard. Put that way, what Susannah said was inarguable. Girls all wanted to get married, he knew that. Amy must know she no longer had any chance of making a good marriage; perhaps that was one reason she was looking so miserable all the time. She might jump at the chance of a husband, even if Charlie couldn’t possibly be any girl’s dream.

The more he thought about it, the more sensible it seemed. It was such a tidy idea. Amy would be respectably married, and she could hold her head high again. She would be just next door, so he could see as much of her as he wanted. She might fret over the baby for a while, but Susannah was right: as soon as she had another child she would forget about it.

‘All right,’ he said at last. ‘Let her decide for herself. If she wants to marry him, I won’t stand in her way.’

Susannah smiled approvingly. ‘I’m sure you’ve made the right decision. I think you’ll find Amy’s pleased about it when she’s had a chance to think it over.’

*

Amy waited until Charlie had disappeared from sight before she got up from the stump and went down to the house. Jack and Susannah were sitting at the table, looking more companionable than Amy could ever remember having seen them. Her father even smiled at Amy. Susannah had a letter near her hand; she fingered it absently.

‘Here she is!’ said Jack.

‘Let me tell her,’ Susannah said quickly, but Jack brushed her aside.

‘I’ll tell her myself. Well, Amy, you’ve had a proposal. What do you think of that?’

Amy looked at him in disbelief, then a happiness so intense that it hurt flooded through her.
Jimmy hasn’t left me. It’s just been some terrible misunderstanding. He still loves me! Oh, and I haven’t been wearing his brooch. I’ll have to confess that to him. I nearly threw myself in the creek! I don’t think I’ll ever be unhappy again once Jimmy’s with me
.

‘Well,
that’s
cheered her up,’ Jack said. ‘Look at her, Susannah, beaming all over that pretty little face.’

‘When did you hear? Just this morning? Did he write to you?’ Amy could hardly get the questions out fast enough.

‘Write?’ Jack let out a laugh. ‘What would he write for? He walked up the road.’

Amy looked around the room in confusion, wondering if Jimmy was in some corner unseen. ‘But… where is he now?’

‘Back in his own house, of course.’

‘Amy doesn’t know who you’re talking about, Jack,’ Susannah put in. Amy looked at her in bewilderment.
Of course I know who Pa’s talking about
.