Severing Sanguine: A Companion Book to The Fallocaust Series Book 2 (15 page)

I got up, my palms scratched up and my nose bleeding. I picked up my sunglasses and covered up my eyes as quickly as I could. Though I could feel their eyes on me, all of them even the ones I only saw inside of my head.

“He has fucking red eyes…” I heard someone gasp. I didn’t even look to see who it was I just picked up my bag of tact and kept running towards the gate.

I opened it without waiting for the old gatekeeper man to talk to me and kept running until I hit the old road with the rows of cars. I could hear yelling behind me but I wasn’t sure what they were saying and I wasn’t going to wait and find out. I was never going back there again.

I was never going to another town ever. I was alone and, like Barry said… I couldn’t be around people anymore.

When I had ran for an hour I leaned against an old station wagon and cried. Eventually it was hard to stand with all my crying so I sat down beside a deflated tire. I grabbed Barry the bear and held him hard and sobbed into his fur.

“At least I’m still your friend,” Barry whispered inside of my head. I nodded and clutched him tight to me.

“I love you, Barry,” I sniffed. “You’re my only friend, never leave me.”

“I won’t ever leave you,” Barry said back. “I am here to help you, that’s why you should always listen to me.”

I nodded because Barry had never told me anything that wasn’t true. He even made up songs about me and he was always there before I went to sleep and after. Sometimes he fell off the bed in the middle of the night but that was my fault.

“I have an idea… something that will make you feel better.”

I looked up and saw Barry the boy looking at me with a toothy smile. He was never afraid of showing his teeth.

He looked different though… his ears were still flat against his head and his hair was starting to turn black and that was pressed against his head too.

“What is it?” I whimpered, wiping my nose with my jacket sleeve.

Barry pointed to my knife on the side of my belt. “Pain makes the inside pain not hurt, Sami. You should cut your arm a little bit, cut your arm and I promise you – you’ll feel better.”

I looked at Barry and saw his black eyes were wide and staring unblinking at me; his grin big and showing me his pointed teeth. My eyes travelled down to the black handle of my knife sticking out of my belt, always ready to help me.

They just want to help me.

I took the knife out of its holder –

– and held it to my arm.

Sami age 8

I didn’t think I would feel this much relief to be back in my home but I did. My entire body seemed to sink into the couch as I laid on it for just a moment to enjoy being back where I was alone.

My greywaster clothes were still on me and my backpack had been thrown down beside the door. I didn’t even stop to get a drink of water I just curled up on the couch with Barry and closed my eyes.

Everything was so tranquil now, like pressing pause on an action movie. The town was the movie, all chaotic with lots of people talking and clustering around each other, busy and overwhelming. It filled my tum with more of those angry insects, the ones that liked to fill my insides with nervousness and anxiety.

And having darkness around me as I closed my eyes was even better. I could already feel my heartbeat slowing down though that might also be because I ran a lot of the way here. My breathing was still quick and my throat dry but I could drink as much water as I could once I got up off of the couch.

I was never going to leave this house, this was where I belonged and I would just have to hunt for more rats to feed myself or look for greywasters to eat. Since spring would be here soon I could build a jerky oven and I would only need one greywaster to feed me for months and months. That was all I needed to be happy; I didn’t want any people.

Well… maybe Nero and Ellis.

My lips tightened as I thought of them and I let out a whimper into Barry’s fur.

“You miss them so much don’t you?” Barry asked quietly. His paw was over the slash in my arm which was stinging and hurting now that I wasn’t running anymore.

I nodded. “They were nice to me and they let me stay in their house. Nero said he would visit me and it’s been over half a year.”

“He probably forgot about you,” was Barry’s reply.

I didn’t believe Barry but I knew if I said it out loud he might get mad at me, so I stayed quiet. Nero and me had fled from those celldwellers and even though it was my fault I attracted them, Nero seemed to have liked spending time with me. And he gave me all those cigarettes too and chocolate. Ellis seemed nice near the end too, at least before I fell asleep.

I didn’t even get to say goodbye to them; they put me in my new room and left me with some new boots and some supplies. Though I wasn’t mad at them for not saying goodbye. I liked this place a lot better than my old town. It had a well and a backyard that backed a big mound of rocks and it was out of sight from almost all angles so it was safe too.

They had done a lot more for me than stupid Nan and a hell of a lot more than Cory or the other people. In the end though I had to do everything for myself.

I wish I had a mom and a dad.

“But your mom died and your dad was a raver,” Barry said beside me, his voice was light and amused. I felt him pat my shoulder. “But that’s okay, you’ll always have me.”

“Yeah,” I said quietly. I stayed lying down for a few more minutes before I got up and started unpacking all of my stuff.

I glanced down at my arm and saw the blood had started to dry around it. I took this chance to practice my bandaging skills and I put on some antiseptic and wrapped it in a long strip of pillowcase I had been slowly ripping for toilet paper. I bound my arm with it and tied it together.

I admired my handiwork and pressed down on the cut just to make it hurt a bit more. Barry was right the pain did take my mind off of my bad experience in Melchai; Barry seemed to always be right.

That night I didn’t sleep well. I kept getting up and looking out the window afraid that the townspeople were going to find me. They sounded really upset when they noticed my red eyes and the store owner had seen my teeth.

What if they came with guns to shoot me… because I was a demon boy.

“Then you need to act like a demon and shoot them back,” Barry mumbled behind me. He sounded half-asleep.

“I only have my handgun…” I said slowly and sighed. “My good guns are probably still in my little town, I think it would take a long time for someone to find them.”

My eyes scanned the blue-tinged wasteland, all dark and spooky with the black trees rising up from the grey dirt like big gnarled hands. I saw nothing out there but an expanse of vast emptiness not even a radrat or a chipped bird.

Nothing… it was just me.

In the end… it had always just been me.

I didn’t notice the tears falling from my face until it was too late. I turned away from the window and held onto Barry and once again cried into him. I felt frustrated because I was so lonely. I was lonely and I would never have any friends or any family because I looked funny and I was evil.

Even the bad people in books and movies had friends. Scar had his hyenas in The Lion King, and Jafar had Iago. Every evil person had their sidekick but I didn’t have anyone but Barry and Barry was mean to me sometimes.

And what was worse was that even when I was walking down the road I got anxious being around so many people so I couldn’t make a friend even if I wanted.

I was all alone and that felt like a giant boot was stepping on my heart. It made me not even want to live anymore because all my life was, was being lonely, worrying about starving, and getting chased out of towns because I was a monster.

I wish Nan had let Gill kill me. I wish Ellis and Nero had let Cory kill me and, and… and I wish my mom Lydia hadn’t given me to Sunshine House and I just died with her.

My life was a big pile of shit and I hated it so much it made my teeth clench together and my legs want to kick and thrash. Though what was the point…? I’d just waste energy and I need that to hunt and scavenge.

There was nothing I could do but fall asleep and hope that I’d have a better day tomorrow.

The winter sun was shining through my window and right onto my face. I opened my eyes and told the sun to piss off but, of course, Mr. Sun didn’t listen.

Eventually I dragged my butt out of bed and peed out the window because it was just easier that way, and walked myself downstairs to eat some of the food I had bought.

The tact was what I was most interested in. I had heard a lot about it before. It was a cracker type of bread that was supposed to be full of all the vitamins and nutrients you needed to not die. It didn’t taste that great though but half of the case I bought contained sweet tact which, like its name suggested, was more sweet and tasty to eat.

As I ate my piece of tact I looked at the wrapper. The wrapper was see-through with blue edges and blue and white lettering. Like everything Dek’ko it had its name on the front and the slogan ‘We care at Dek’ko’, and on this one it had a picture of a cartoon puppy with the tact in its mouth.

Dek’ko was the only business that still makes food after the world ended, the other company was called Skytech and they were the ones that made the carracats but also things like vaccines and technology stuff. Another big thing was the Legion but they were military not a company and I kind of liked them more now since I found out Nero and Ellis were a part of the Legion. Even though I had heard bad things I decided this was my opinion.

I lit my fire with the tact half in my mouth and took a sip of my whisky just because I was feeling adult. When I was all warmed up and fed I wandered outside to gather some firewood from the big woodshed and stacked it all inside so I wouldn’t have to go into the cold anymore. Since I had food I saw no need to go out and freeze my butt off so today would be an inside day.

I spent the entire day reading The Pawn of Prophecy and I wrote down every word I didn’t understand and looked it up. Though since it was a fantasy book a lot of the words weren’t real words which was confusing at first but I got the hang of it. After I was bored of reading I drew some pictures with my old crayons and when I was bored of that still I decided to write myself math problems to try and solve. I had found a calculator in one of the nightstands and that was fun to play with. I would type in equations and try and figure out what each sign meant. I was just starting to learn what X meant.

That night I went to bed not feeling as sad, Barry was being nice and we even played legionary together. I was the legionary and he was the greywaster Cory. I beat him with a stick until I made him cry mercy.

As was my usual routine I piled myself up with blankets and closed my eyes, listening to Daisy Daisy though I now sung my own version in my head. When his music box wound down everything was quiet and I drifted off to sleep.

When I woke up the next morning I was confused, for a moment I thought I was back in Sunshine House with Nan and the kids she took in. The noises were the same… the stove crackling and the good smells, food smells. I didn’t understand what I was hearing or smelling but it was comforting all the same. For a few moments I even closed my eyes again in anticipation to wait until Nan sent someone up to get me.

Then with a wash of cold dread my mind started to catch up with my daydreaming and I realized I was hearing someone downstairs.

Nero and Ellis had come back to visit me! I jumped up from my bed with Barry and ran into the living room.

I stopped dead in my tracks and stared.

“Hey, Sami,” Jasper greeted me. He had a smile on his face but I still took a step back. My feet felt like lead though and one step back was all I could manage.

“Hi…” I said slowly. I looked to the door and saw that a new big duffle bag was there and his boots. He was in my living room minding something on the stove only wearing his pants and a sweater, not dressed for outside at all. “Why are you in my home?”

Jasper’s eyes brightened; his face creasing under his pleasant smile. “I felt horrible that you left town so quickly, especially after those assholes made you feel bad because of your eye colour.” I gasped realizing I didn’t have my sunglasses on, I turned to run but Jasper said quickly.

“I had a brother who had eyes like yours, Sami…” Jasper called after me. I stopped halfway down the hall. “He had teeth like yours too. Pointed teeth Terry said? I’m not like them… I don’t care.”

He… he didn’t care? I stopped and turned around, Jasper was looking right at me, at my real eyes and real teeth. He wasn’t scared of me and he wasn’t throwing things at me or calling me a demon.

“Really? Someone like me?” I said quietly. I looked right at him to try and see if he was fibbing but Jasper just looked back at me with the same friendly attitude.

He nodded before waving me over. “Yeah, he lives back on my farm. His name’s Tristan. I thought maybe you’d want to meet him since you seemed a bit sad.”

“How old is he?” I asked eagerly.

Please be my age, please be my age.

“He’s ten years old.”

I smiled but put my hand over my mouth just because I didn’t want to show off all my teeth. This made me so happy though, I felt like running around the house.

“Could you bring him here next time? Can I play with him?” I asked. All of my nervousness over this man had disappeared with the excitement of having a boy like me to play with. He would be my first real true friend besides Barry. And maybe he would become an even bigger friend than Barry since Barry was mean sometimes.

“Well, I was thinking I could spend the day here and we could both go back to my farm tomorrow morning. I have a three-wheeler so it would only take a day to get there. I brought some food for you too and some toys. Want to see?” Jasper slid the cast iron frying pan off of my stove and put it on the kitchen counter.

I frowned though because I had just gotten back to my place and I didn’t want to be on the road again, but Jasper was an adult and I didn’t want to make him cross with me. If I made him mad he might not let me be friends with Tristan.

Jasper didn’t wait for my answer. He walked over to his duffle bag and unzipped it, his crinkly black hair falling over his face. I think he had greeny brown eyes but I wasn’t sure, they certainly weren’t red like mine. I wonder why his brother had red eyes and he didn’t.

“Wow!” I gasped as I saw what Jasper was pulling out of his bag. It was the same electronic that the lady at the Holi Inn had had! The one that played the cartoons on a little screen.

I ran over excited but felt my brow furrow as I got a closer look at it. “This was the one the lady had… she said she wasn’t going to sell it.”

Jasper handed it to me and I took it from him like it was made of glass. I laid it carefully on my cluttered dining table and opened it up. The screen was small but it looked so high tech, I had never seen anything like it. It was like space age!

“I’m a merchant, remember? I traded some of my supply for it so you could finish watching those cartoons you left behind,” Jasper said behind me. “Do you like it? I found The Lion King on DVD too and another one you had in there – Aladdin, I think.”

He bought all this for me? I turned around and gave him a skeptical look. “Why did you buy this for me? You don’t know who I am.”

“Sure I know who you are… Sami from the pub. We said cheers twice, right? We’re friends now aren’t we?” Jasper laughed. He had really bad teeth.

I still looked at him skeptical. He carried on, “I brought that portable DVD player and you can say thank you by letting me stay here tonight. That’s how friendship works doesn’t it? You do nice things for each other?”