Sexual Healing for Three (27 page)

210

Gracie C. McKeever

“You didn’t fail to do your job. You don’t have control over life and death, Donna, especially when so many sinister variables are at work. Fate is not in your realm.”

She fixed her sister with a long stare before asking, “But it’s in yours?”

“I never claimed to be in control of anyone’s fate. I just help things along as much as I can and let nature takes its course. That’s what you do in your job, but in the end, people make their own decisions, and you can’t stop what’s meant to happen or be.”

“And if I decide that Chance and Russ aren’t my soul mates and I don’t want to be with them?”

“Clever change of subject.”

“Not at all. We’re still talking about fate and control. Do I ultimately have a say in what man I have in my life?

“Of course you do, honey. No one can make you feel something you don’t feel or force you to do what you don’t want do.”

That was certainly true. No one had held a gun to her head and forced her to screw two men at the same time. She had done that totally on her own because she’d wanted them. And she’d liked it. But admitting it to anyone but herself wasn’t as easy as doing the deed had been. And admitting she had feelings for two men…well, she didn’t even want to consider that now.

“You do have feelings for them.”

Donna just looked at her sister and didn’t say anything. Why bother?

Angela leaned forward and patted Donna’s shoulder before she turned and headed for the door. She paused with her hand on the knob and looked at Donna over her shoulder.

“For the record, they
are
your soul mates. There’s no decision to be made about that except whether to recognize them as such.”

“Whatever.”

Angela grinned. “And by the way, it’s not
screwing
when you care about the person.”

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Donna watched her sister leave and thought it was screwing until she decided different but admitted that she was falling for both Russ and Chance and they had all made love the other night. And she wasn’t ready to give up her control and admit
that
to anyone yet.

* * * *

Russ almost mowed Donna over on his way into the house through the sliding glass doors, stopping abruptly to catch her around the shoulders before she could topple over.

“When did you get here?” He felt Donna tense in his grasp at the demanding tone and tightened his grip just enough to let her know that he wasn’t letting her go anywhere.

He had been having so much fun the last few hours—stuffing his face and participating in all the various outdoor activities for which Angela had arranged—that he’d forgotten to think about Donna or how upset and disappointed he was in her for avoiding him and not making it to the barbecue.

But with her soft vanilla musk wafting out to him, firing all his horny cylinders, the memory of her mouth on his, how warm and tight she’d been around his cock when he’d been inside her, crashed into him like a tidal wave.

“A few minutes ago,” she answered.

“Where have you been?”

“In the bathroom, if it’s any business of yours. Now can I get by?”

She tried to pull out of his grasp, and Russ gentled his hold but still didn’t release her.

“What?”

He peered at her and sensed something wrong. “Are you okay?”

He bent at the waist, leaning closer to get a look in her eyes as she lowered her head and averted her gaze, looking anywhere but at him.

“What happened to you?”

“Russ, please…” She tried to pull away again.

212

Gracie C. McKeever

“Not this time.” He drew her against his chest, imprisoning her arms between them just as she raised them to shove him away. He leaned close to whisper in her ear, “Stop running away from me.”

“I’m not afraid of you. I just had things on my mind.”

“Who said anything about your being afraid?”

She gawked at him, didn’t say anything, and Russ added,

“Freudian slip?”

Donna freed one fist to punch his chest, and it must have felt good to her because she freed the other, and before Russ knew it, she was full-out pounding on him with both fists and sobbing.

He pulled back to let her get her shit off and didn’t mind getting bruised if it gave her a moment of the release she so obviously needed. He let the abuse go on for a few moments before he finally caught her by the wrists, lowering and imprisoning her arms behind her back. He yanked her up against his chest again. He was hard and couldn’t help being so.

Donna didn’t seem to notice or care. She simply leaned her face against him, panting. For the time being, she was out of gas. After a long moment, she lifted her head and took a deep, shaky breath, standing so close her firm nipples brushed against him. She licked her lips and stood on her toes, her slit warm and demanding, her gaze inviting.

If his pulse hadn’t been jumpstarted by her attack, that look and the feel of her in his arms did the trick. It wasn’t long before Russ buried her lips beneath his, desperate for a sample of her. He swept his tongue into her mouth and was instantly assaulted with the salty taste of tears.

His heart tightened in his chest at the idea of what could have caused her emotional collapse, but he didn’t stop kissing her. Instead he pulled her as close as he could without climbing inside her, instinctively knowing that whatever trauma had occurred in her life, she didn’t need or want coddling. She wanted to get out her frustration in a very physical way.

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He understood that type of need, that type of torment. He’d been there—as a kid—kicking toys and throwing his books when his stepfather locked him in his room so he could “talk” to Russ’s mother in private. He’d been annoyed that the opportunities to protect his mother had been denied him because he was too young, too small—

helpless.

He wasn’t helpless anymore. Neither was Donna, and he wasn’t going to let her suffer alone, not on his watch.

She clung to him with her mouth, darting her tongue between his lips and taking her fill with what physical wiles were at her disposal.

With her hands imprisoned, she used the rest of her body to the best of her ability, turning him inside out with the feel of her soft curves brushing against him, the sounds of her needful whimpers meshing with his primal growls.

When he finally pulled away, they were both breathless.

Damn, he had been here with her before, their encounters getting more and more intense each time. At this rate, they would both combust during a full-fledged scene, leaving Chance behind to clean up the debris.

“What happened to you?” Russ rasped.

“Not to me, to one of my clients.”

He arched a brow as she tilted back her head to look at him. He didn’t release her wrists, and she didn’t ask him to. He had a feeling she was enjoying the way he was restraining her. Maybe it was the way she rubbed against him and sighed that gave him a clue.

“Her husband…he killed her.”

Russ hissed, tightening his grip on her when he felt her go taut against him. “Are you okay?” he repeated.

“I will be.”

That went without saying. It was just a matter of time. But there was here and now, and she wasn’t okay
now
. “I missed you.”

“I can’t do this.”

214

Gracie C. McKeever

“I’m not asking you to do anything except listen and let me hold you.”

She looked at him, defiance and sadness shining out of her doe eyes like twin beacons, electrifying his nervous system.

She still didn’t pull away, but he released his hold to ease the stress on her shoulders, gently squeezing and rubbing her arms as he took a step back.

“If you’re going to tell me I need to be careful, don’t bother. I get that speech from Angela and the rest of my family every other day.”

“They worry about you.”

“And if you’re even thinking about telling me to leave me job, you can forget it.”

“Why would I tell you to do that?” He watched her fidget beneath his frown, realization instantly dawning. “Has someone else told you to?”

“You could say that,” she muttered.

He heard every word, though—spoken and unspoken.

Some guy had done a real job on her in the past, not just physically, but mentally and emotionally. “I wouldn’t give you an ultimatum like that.”

“You say that now. You don’t have a vested interest.”

“Who says I don’t?”

“You know what I mean. I’m just someone you slept with.

There’s no commitment.”

“Really? You think two weeks ago was a one-shot deal?” He put his arms around her to draw her close, pressing against her, daring her with his body.

She didn’t retreat, glaring up at him with a challenge of her own.

“Would it matter what I said? Since you and Angela seem to have your mind made up about this relationship.”

“Angela doesn’t speak for me. I’m perfectly capable of coming to my own conclusions.”

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215

“And what conclusions have you come to concerning me and you?’

“I’d like to know the answer to that one myself.”

Russ noticed the uncomfortable look on Donna’s face and knew who had come into the house behind him.

216

Gracie C. McKeever

“Private party, or can anyone join?” Chance grinned, more for Donna’s benefit than his brother’s.

“Actually, I was on my way out to get some eats and join the sports action. I’ve got some catching up to do.” Donna pulled from Russ’s grasp, and Russ let her go.

Chance could tell from the look on his brother’s face that it was the last thing in the world he wanted to do, just as he could tell from the look on Donna’s face that her cheer was forced.

“Don’t leave before we talk,” Russ said to Donna’s back, and she waved over her shoulder without turning.

Chance wondered how long they had been alone in the house together, what else had been said before he’d gotten there, especially when he noticed Donna’s puffy, red-rimmed eyes.

His fingers itched to reach out and touch her, but he didn’t want to put her through any more grief than she had obviously been through.

Not to mention he wanted to be alone with Russ to find out what the hell had happened.

When he had left Donna two weekends ago, it hadn’t been under antagonistic circumstances, not by a long shot. From what he had seen of her directly after Russ’s departure, Chance couldn’t say the same about their parting. She had been pissed at Russ, for whatever reasons. And Donna had been keeping her distance from both of them, as if Chance was guilty by association.

He watched her now, closing the sliding glass door behind her and running down the deck steps as if she couldn’t get away from them fast enough.

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217

Chance whirled on Russ. “What did you say to her?

“Nothing she didn’t need to hear.”

“She looked like she was crying.”

“She was.”

“You made her do that?”

“If you have to ask, then you don’t know anything about me.”

Chance sighed. That was the problem. He didn’t know anything about Russ, not what counted. He used to think he knew Russ as well as he knew himself. He knew, for instance, that Russ would never raise his hand to hurt a woman. But in the last two weeks, Chance had learned that the rules governing the meaning of “hurt” got a little fuzzy in the world of BDSM. Some women—and men—
liked
pain, were what Russ had referred to in passing as “pain sluts.”

Chance spent too much time around pain and suffering to understand the enjoyment that could be derived from either. Maybe he was in the wrong business. Or maybe he hadn’t met and been with the right woman.

“You’re still confused by the rules of the Life. I understand that, Chance. But let me handle Donna. I know what she needs, especially right now.”

“I’m beginning to wonder what purpose in this relationship I serve at all other than acting as your buffer and leading a lamb to the slaughter.”

“It’s that sort of pessimism that is going to rub off on Donna and make her more skittish about this whole thing than she already is.”

“If she’s skittish, maybe she really isn’t the sub you think she is.

Maybe you’re wrong about her, and she’s not into BDSM.”

Russ gritted his teeth and shook his head. “I’m not wrong.”

Chance peered at him, noticed the determined set of his brother’s jaw, the steely glint to his gray eyes, and wondered how far Russ would go to prove he was right.

218

Gracie C. McKeever

Russ put his arm around Chance’s shoulder and pulled him close.

“You think too much, Lil’ Bro. You need to just let things happen and
feel
.”

“This coming from Mr. Self Control?”

“There’s a time and a place for everything.” Russ gave him an enigmatic smile. “Trust me, I know how to let go when it counts.”

Chance wanted to ask him how much letting go he planned to do with Donna and wondered if he could stomach a “scene,” wondered if he wanted to.

He was a grown man and had seen some bad things in his life, had seen the end result of relationships between men and women, relationships gone horribly wrong. But none of this had yet inured him to the suffering of others.

Empathy in his profession, but more importantly in BDSM, was more of a drawback and a curse than a blessing.

“So what happened to her? Why was she crying?”

“I don’t think it’s my place to tell you.”

“Why? Is it a secret?”

“I just think it’s something she doesn’t want broadcast all over the place. At least not yet and not by anyone else but her until she’s ready to tell you.”

Goddess, you’d think Russ was the mind reader. “Okay, fine.”

Chance headed for the glass doors, but paused with his hand on the handle when Russ caught him by an arm.

“Were you looking for her or me earlier?”

“Take a guess.”

Russ chuckled. “Maybe you should give her some space.”