Read Shattered & Mended Online
Authors: Julie Bailes,Becky Hot Tree Editing
“Blake?”
“Yeah, baby?”
“Can I feel it? Can I feel how much hair is missing?”
“I don’t really want you touching it. Even though you’re getting antibiotics, I don’t want to raise the risk of infection,” he advises.
“Okay,” I mutter sadly.
He walks back over, grabs some supplies and brings them over to the tray beside him. “I’m just going to clean the wound, and then I have that surprise I promised you.” I nod, nervous that the only reason he doesn’t want me to feel the back of my head is because he fears I’ll freak out. I’m sure they shaved more than they claimed. The spot he cleans gets cold and tingles. He puts some sort of ointment over it and is finished. He removes his gloves, tosses them in the trash, washes his hands, and comes back over, sitting in the rocking chair.
He reaches into his back pocket and pulls out his wallet. He opens it and pulls out a flimsy, medium square picture. “You ready?” he asks.
“You bet,” I reply. He places the picture on my lap, and a smile immediately spreads across my face. I stare at the picture of our little jumping beans in complete bliss as Blake describes what we’re looking at.
“You see this? That’s his arms,” he points out.
“A boy, huh? What makes you so sure it’s a boy, Dr. Andrews?”
“These balls are manly, baby. They make men,” he jokes. Shrugging, he continues on to the next baby. “But don’t worry, they make girls, too. You see this one? This one’s our prissy little princess.” He continues to babble on about the babies, pointing out their heads and small tadpole bodies. I already know what I’m looking at, but he’s excited, and I’ll keep on pretending like I don’t. I let him have this moment of pure euphoria.
I lean up and capture his mouth, silencing him for just a moment. The kiss I give him provides more emotion than words. My kiss is full of love, intense passion, appreciation, and elation. He breaks our kiss by speaking against my lips. “Wow. You’re not going to make following the doctor’s orders easy, are you?” I shake my head and continue to devour his mouth, loving the taste of his tongue and the smell that’s distinctly him. He takes my bottom lip between his teeth. “Got something else for you, so chill it with the teasing.”
He unleashes my lip and stands. He reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a white gold necklace. He kneels down beside me and places his hand on top of my lap. He opens his hand, and in his palm is the most beautiful heart-shaped locket. On one half of the locket, there are two sets of footprints, and the other holds an engraving: ‘Seasons are many, their reasons are few. What’ll always remain is my love for you.’ Tears of joy stream down my face as I open the locket and see the pictures. On the right is a picture of Blake and me out by the ocean. He’s standing behind me with his arms wrapped around my neck, and my hands are clinging to his wrist. My head’s resting back on his shoulder and our lips are connected. On the left of the locket
, he’s had the picture of the twins shrunk down to fit inside perfectly.
I’m a blissful blubbering mess. It could be my hormones, but I’m betting it’s the overwhelming amount of love I hold for the most beautiful and thoughtful man God’s ever created; aside from Jesus, that it. “It took all my might not to buy you the biggest and most beautiful diamond they had, but I know how your mind works, and I don’t want you thinking I’m proposing just because you’re pregnant.” His fingers trace my left ring finger as he speaks. He looks up to me and says, “Don’t I get a kiss? I mean, they say every kiss begins with Kay.”
I snort from the heavy laugh-and-cry mixture. “You went to Kay’s?”
He shakes his head. “Of course not, I went to Jared,” he smiles.
“Just get your ass up here so I can give you a kiss you deserve, Dr. Andrews,” I tease, scraping my teeth over my bottom lip.
His hand cups the side of my face, and his thumb traces my bottom lip. “You keep that shit up, and I’m going to be Googling safe sex helmets.” Note to self, search sex helmets.
~Wyatt~
It’s been two long, sleepless nights. I granted Allie her wish; I left and haven’t returned to the hospital. Her vicious words sent chills down my spine and my world crumbling down around me. Staying away from her when we’re in such close proximity is hard, really fucking difficult. I’ve hopped in my Jeep several times a day and driven to the hospital, but I haven’t stepped a foot on its ground. I want nothing more than to walk right into her room and demand for her to tell me exactly what she saw between me and Sophie, make her tell me how I can get our daughter back. I can’t. Lucille made me promise I’d let Allie settle in at home before approaching her with such a sensitive topic. Lucille keeps me updated and tells me Allie should be released either later tonight or early tomorrow, but she and Allie are in opposition about where Al should stay. Lucille wants her here in her own home, but Blake believes Allie will be better off staying with him.
Blake doesn’t want Allie anywhere near me. He claims it’s because I’ll put stress on her, and he’s right. However, I still believe it’s because he feels threatened by me, and he damn well should. She doesn’t belong to him. Deep down inside, he knows it. Lucille asked me to stay out of Allie’s sight the first few days she’s home, and I agreed. She won’t put me out because we’re family, but she still has to put Allie first. That’s perfectly fine with me; Allie will always be first. But once Lucille returns to work, we’ve made arrangements for me to be here with Al, as long as she agrees to it. Which won’t be easy because she’s so damn hardheaded. Hopefully, she’ll stow her stubbornness for a few days and let me help her. My heart jumps into my throat as my phone blasts through the dead silence of the house.
“Wyatt,” I answer.
“Mr. Cooper?”
“Yeah, that’s me,” I confirm.
“Good evening, this is Fallon calling from Onslow Memorial. I’m calling because Dr. Ruben would like to speak with you about your results.”
“Sure. I have a few moments to talk.”
“Oh, I apologize. I should’ve made myself a little clearer. Dr. Ruben would like for you to come in so he can go over the results with you, in person. When can you come in?”
“I can make it there in forty-five minutes.”
“Perfect,” she begins. “I’ll let Dr. Ruben know you’re coming. Once you get here, just drop by the front desk and ask them to alert me that you’re here,” she finishes.
“On my way.” I hang up, grab my keys, and dart to my Jeep. I drive like a maniac to the hospital, but once I get there, I remain in my Jeep like a fucking idiot. I should be sprinting inside to get my results, but what if they aren’t what I hope? What if I did sleep with Sophie just because I was drunk? I’ve never gotten so drunk I couldn’t remember events that happened while I was throwing back a few brewskies, but I’ve heard it happens. Bolts of anxiety travel through me as reality sinks in. When I walk through those doors and get my results, it
’s decision time. Will I fight or take flight? I’ve told myself that if I did this to myself, I’d walk away. But now it’s crunch time, I’m not sure I can make her a past memory. All I know is her. All I want is her. My future, it’s all her.
My door pulls open, and I rear back my fist ready to bust some face. “Whoa there, lower your guns,” Lucille orders. Shit. She can’t creep up on me like this. I’ve spent the last four years watching my back and can’t be held responsible for my actions when someone sneaks up on me. And I couldn’t live with myself if I ever hit a woman, especially the woman I view as my mother.
“Sheesh, Lucille, you can’t do that shit,” I breathe.
“I know. Sorry, I forget,” she frowns.
“Why are you sitting here in your car looking dazed and confused?”
“I’m just here to get my results,” I announce.
“Results? The drug screen?”
“Yeah. They asked me to come in for them. For some reason, he couldn’t tell me over the phone.”
“That’s great news, Wyatt!”
“Great news? Why do you say that?” I ask.
She smiles and motions for me to exit the Jeep. I hop out and her arm hooks mine, and she then leads me to the ER entrance. “Because, they only call you in if something’s abnormal. If your test was negative, they’d have told you over the phone,” she explains.
Makes sense. I go to the front desk and tell them I’m here to meet with Dr. Ruben. The man at the desk calls back and lets someone know that I’ve arrived. Almost immediately, the nurse who gathered my samples a few days ago calls my name. “Mr. Cooper, you may come on back.”
Lucille grips my arms and asks, “Would you like for me to go back with you?”
I do. I don’t want to go through this on my own. Good or bad, I’m going to need someone to lean on. Either way, the fight that lies ahead of me isn’t going to be an easy one.
We get into the room, and I take a seat on
the exam table.
Lucille sits in the chair next to me and rests her hand on my knee. “Just breathe. It’ll all be fine,” she assures.
“Mr. Cooper,” Dr. Ruben acknowledges, extending his hand to mine for a shake.
“Lucille,” he nods. He steadies his stool and takes a seat before opening the chart and removing several pieces of paper. “Well, I’ve got some good and bad news for you,” he informs. I squeeze the sides of the table tightly, bracing myself for the results.
“Good news is you tested positive for a drug we refer to as MDMA, an ingredient found in ecstasy, which would explain the symptoms you’re experiencing,” he explains. I fucking knew it. I knew I wouldn’t go to another chick’s home, and I sure as hell wouldn’t coherently fuck her.
“Ecstasy, huh. I know it can cause people to act ape-shit crazy, but what about the aftermath? I can’t remember anything, and this is why? It causes memory loss?” He closes the chart and tosses it aside. He leans his back against the wall and places his pen back into his shirt pocket.
“In an addict, no. But for you, yes. The effects are greater for you than they are for a typical, everyday user.”
“Would you mind elaborating a little more? I mean, I couldn’t care less about remembering any second of me being in contact with Sophie, but I need to know how to explain this to my girl,” I explain.
“It’s a hallucinogenic stimulant, a psychedelic amphetamine. It triggers a chemical in your brain known as serotonin. See, serotonin contributes to mood regulation and in most cases, increases sex drive. As far as your memory is concerned, you may or may not remember the events that took place after you consumed the substance. In addition to the memory loss, it also causes confusion, anxiety, and depression for days, sometimes weeks.”
“Wait. And they distribute shit like this from pharmacies? Isn’t that, I don’t know, illegal?” I bite out.
“Wyatt Cooper,” Lucille warns. “I understand you’re frustrated, and so am I. But, Dr. Ruben is just doing his job. He has no control over what the pharmacies distribute. He deserves an apology,” she adds.
She’s right; he’s done nothing wrong. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap. I know it’s not your fault that others abuse drugs, but this pisses me off to no end. I’ve never once taken any drugs, and the first time I do, it’s involuntary, and it’s not the soft shit like marijuana. No, it’s hardcore fucking ecstasy!”
He clears his throat and nods, accepting my apology. “The next step would be to file a report and press charges. We’ve got the evidence to secure an arrest and to prosecute,” he informs.
Charges? I should have her ass put in jail, but at the moment, I’ve got enough shit going on in my life. “How long do I have to press charges?” I ask.
“To the best of my knowledge, North Carolina doesn’t have a limitation. However, the sooner the better, Mr. Cooper.”
“I shouldn’t have to go through this. No one should,” I sigh, completely irritated.
“I understand. I can only imagine how frustrating this is for you,” he expresses.
Imagine, my ass. He can’t begin to understand how I feel. On top of feeling violated, I’m over here contemplating what it’s going to take to get Allie back. I turn my attention to Lucille and pour out a little more of my heart. “I fought for my life to get back to her, literally. Before this shit happened, I had her. She was waking up and getting ready to reopen her heart to me, but now … now, I feel as if I’m fighting a battle that’s already been lost,” I choke.
Dr. Ruben stands from his stool and places his hand on my shoulder. “If you fought that hard to get back to her, don’t give up now. You’ll regret it the rest of your life. Stay strong,” he encourages, slapping the back of my shoulder.
“Thank you,” I say, lowering my head to hide my escaping tears.
“I’m going to have my staff make a copy of the results so you can take a copy with you. Show them to her. Don’t hesitate if you need for me to sit down with you and your girlfriend to explain your results and how the drug affects the mind. ”
“No need. I’ll take care of Allie. Thank you, Dr. Ruben,” Lucille chimes.
“Yes, ma’am. Like I said, I’m here if you need me.”
He shakes Lucille’s hand and exits the room. As soon as the door closes, Lucille stands up and places her hands on her hips, her clogs tapping the floor. “Ugh! I just— I can’t believe …” She paces the small room, mumbling inaudible words under her breath.
“Lucille?”
“What?”
“Help me.”
Her arms fall and she eyes me quizzically. “Help you what?” she asks.
“Help me fight for her,” I beg. Lucille rushes to me and wraps her arms around my neck. She doesn’t say a word; she just consoles me.
I rest my head on her shoulder and let it all out; secretly asking God to be with me through this battle I’m entering. I’m not scared that I’ve lost Allie. I haven’t. I’m afraid of what Allie can do to me. I learned earlier that hateful words are like bullets being shot into my chest. They’re lethal.
The nurse comes in and hands me my copy of the results. I fold the papers and shove them into my back pocket. Lucille and I head back out into the waiting room, splitting in different directions. She goes for the doors that lead out into the parking lot, and I head for the elevators.
“Um, where you goin’?” Lucille questions.
“To see Allie. I’m going to tell her what Dr. Ruben said,” I reply, reading the doubt on her face.
She tsks, shakes her head, walks over to grab my wrist and pulls me with her to the exit. “No, sir, you aren’t. You promised to let her settle in before you attacked her with all this madness. That’s not changing just because you got the answers you were looking for. She still needs rest. The less stress she’s under, the faster she’ll recover. Come on, my shift’s over. We’ll pick up some movies, and I’ll cook you some dinner. Whatever you want.” I listen to her and know she’s right. As much as I want to prove to Allie that I wouldn’t betray her, she doesn’t need any added stress. I’ll leave her alone, for now.