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Sean nodded. He still would rather have not had Alana sitting there when the door was pushed open and Jaime stepped through.

“Hey.” Jaime’s eyes locked on his, and he started to reach out to pull Sean closer before he stopped and moved to scratch the back of his neck instead. “Sorry. For everything. I don’t know if you want me to….”

Jaime waved between them and sighed, and the insecurity in his eyes made it impossible for Sean not to take his hand to pull him closer.

“It’s okay. Well, not all okay yet, but this is okay.” Sean leaned closer, but instead of going straight for a kiss, he mirrored the move Jaime had used on him often and ducked to the side to let his face fall in the crook of Jaime’s neck. Instead of leaving a tempting trail of kisses, he stayed there a few seconds breathing in the way Jaime’s cologne mixed with his own personal scent. He let his hands rest on Jaime’s hips as Jaime’s arms came up around his back to hold him in.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so stupid,” Jaime whispered as he moved one of his hands up to thread in Sean’s hair.

“Well, okay. I can agree with that one.” Alana’s voice broke the moment, but Sean tightened his hold to keep Jaime from stepping back.

“Sorry. I didn’t see you,” Jaime said over his shoulder, but he gave up trying to pull away when Sean held on and groaned into Jaime’s neck. He tried to remind himself that Alana was also the person who spent all of Sunday getting Travis to wait on them while they sat on the couch watching bad TV.

“Obviously—unless that display was to keep me from breaking your kneecaps or something.”

“Alana.” Sean gave in and pulled away from Jaime to glare at her.

“I didn’t say I was actually going to break his kneecaps. Travis would kill me if I got arrested, and he couldn’t post bail until tomorrow morning.”

“Sorry. I don’t think I can make her leave,” Sean said as he turned his back on her. He’d had enough practice ignoring her, and Jaime had admitted to having a younger brother, so maybe he could just block her out also.

“It’s okay. I kind of like having my kneecaps, so we don’t have to try.” Jaime gave him a small smile. He moved his hand toward Sean’s, and when he hesitated, Sean reached out to catch his hand before Jaime could change his mind and shove his hands in his pockets. He threaded their fingers together and felt some of his own tension relax when Jaime didn’t resist.

“Look.” Sean took a deep breath and forced himself to keep talking although he knew he might be ending everything. “I’m not really mad, and I understand dating around, but I don’t really want to do that anymore. Well, I wasn’t, but I get why you were.”

“Sean.” Jaime’s voice was soft, but Sean shook his head before Jaime could continue. If he didn’t finish this now, he wouldn’t be able to say it later, and then Alana would either butt in or tell Travis. Probably both.

“Just let me finish,” Sean said, and Jaime nodded and squeezed the hand he was holding. “I’m just past the point of being okay with that. So I need to know that’s not what’s going on anymore. You don’t have to just say yes because you came tonight if you’re not sure, but that’s what I need if you’re coming back tomorrow.”

“Look at me?” Jaime asked, tugging a little at the hand Sean had been staring at while he talked. “I haven’t done this in a long time. I haven’t met anyone that made me want to, and I’m sorry I didn’t figure out that I wanted this until I almost lost it, but I’m there. There’s no one else I’m attached to.”

“You’re sure?” Sean asked as Jaime moved his free hand to the back of his neck. His thumb brushed over Sean’s cheek.

“I’m sure.” Jaime’s hand on his neck urged him closer, but it was gentle enough to give Sean the choice to close the distance. Sean didn’t hesitate any longer before moving to bring their lips together. Jaime lost his hesitation and deepened the kiss, nipping at Sean’s bottom lip because he knew it always made Sean give in completely.

“Still here. Still in a public place,” Alana called behind them.

Jaime broke the kiss, but he didn’t step away as he pressed his face against Sean’s neck to compose himself.

“
Te veías tan guapo
.” Jaime breathed the words into his throat before pulling back. Sean didn’t bother asking him to translate. If he never did for Sean, he wouldn’t in front of Alana.

“Travis says he’s already introduced all the donors to every other principal and soloist, and he can only push the interns at them so much when they’re the ones paying us. He would like us to remember that we’re expected to smile and pretend to be interested in something they have to say besides the money they give to the arts so that they’ll write him some more checks.” Alana typed something into her phone and hopped off the counter. “We really have to get out there.”

“Sorry.” Sean kept himself from asking Jaime to come up with a reason to stay while Aleksandra drove Lupe and Michael home.

“It’s okay. I’ll see you tomorrow. I’ll probably take them soon since we have to drive back.”

Sean leaned in for one more kiss before Alana took his arm and dragged him away and out of the bathroom.

Chapter 9

S
EAN
LET
the hot water sluice through his hair and over the sore muscles of his shoulders. He was lingering in the shower longer than he should. Sean had come back to the apartment with Travis and had plenty of time to be out of the shower before Jaime was expected to show up, but he hadn’t rushed the way he should have.

He heard a knock on the door, but he stayed under the spray and let Travis get the door. A week ago, he would have rushed to the door to pull Jaime past Travis, but even with the hope that Jaime meant everything he’d said, Sean didn’t trust himself not to take one look at Jaime and forgive everything the way he’d wanted to the night before. He needed the extra minutes to strengthen his own resolve, anyway. He heard Travis say something as he dried off and smoothed moisturizer over his face, but he couldn’t make out the words.

Travis was on the other side of the bathroom door when Sean opened it. He blocked Sean’s view before Sean could look past him to find Jaime, and let his hand rest on Sean’s shoulder as he leaned close enough that Sean could hear him at the lower volume.

“I’ll stay in my room, but just let me know if you want me to kick him out or you need anything.”

“I know.” Sean brought his hand up to rest on Travis’s wrist for a second before pushing him away.

Travis nodded, but he turned back to where Sean could now see Jaime standing by the couch.

“He has to be up at eight-thirty for the matinee tomorrow. It’s already ten. Don’t keep him up all night.”

Sean pushed Travis away and toward his room.

“You’re not my babysitter or my mother.”

Travis just laughed as he left and called back, “Your mom loves me. She’d be on my side.”

Sean shook his head as he turned to Jaime.

“Sorry. You can ignore that.” Sean nodded toward his room when Jaime didn’t answer. “I should probably put on more than a towel.”

“If the plan is to talk, that’s probably a good idea.” Jaime finally gave him the smirk Sean was used to, but it didn’t carry to his eyes.

Jaime followed Sean to his room, but paused at the door instead of following Sean inside.

“Are you really going to lose the ability to talk if you watch me change?” Sean asked.

“I wasn’t sure you wanted me to.” Jaime came in and closed the door behind him.

“Oh. I’ve been changing in front of rooms of people for so long I don’t really think about it. I don’t even notice when I change in front of Alana.” Sean pulled a pair of loose gray sweatpants from the top shelf his closet. He glanced over his shoulder as he took off the towel and hung it up. As Sean pulled on the sweatpants, Jaime had averted his eyes to study the bracelets and leather cuffs Sean had left on his dresser. “Should I be worried you’re not watching? I do actually notice when
you
watch me.”

“No,” Jaime said as he looked up from his examination of the medallion on the leather wrap bracelet that had been Sean’s favorite the last few months. “I just wasn’t fully joking about not being able to think.”

Jaime moved toward him slowly enough to give Sean time to back away. When he didn’t, Jaime stepped into his space and let his eyes drift down to the defined muscles of Sean’s abdomen. His eyes flicked to Sean’s before moving back down as he lifted his right hand to place it flat against Sean’s bare stomach. He left it there for a few seconds, just stroking feather light with his thumb as Sean sucked in a breath, and then grazed his hand up the side of Sean’s chest. Jaime’s eyes followed his hand as his thumb rubbed around and over Sean’s nipple. He only looked up to meet Sean’s eyes when Sean let a harsh gasp escape his lips.

“Right.” Sean knew his voice was rough as he pulled back and turned away. “I’ll just find a shirt, and you can take off your shoes, because I don’t have a foot fetish, and your dirty boots aren’t getting on my bed.”

Jaime chuckled behind him as Sean took more time to find a T-shirt than he really needed. This was why he’d let Travis talk to Jaime. Left alone, Sean just wanted to give in and let Jaime take him apart with his touch. When he turned around, Jaime was reclining on his bed with his back propped up on the black leather headboard, but it was far from his normal relaxed sprawl.

Sean crawled onto the bed to lie next to him on his side, but left a safe amount of space between them.

“I really didn’t think you were going to come back after last week. I wasn’t even sure after last night that you’d really show up tonight,” Sean said as picked at a thread on his comforter.

“I know. I didn’t plan to—after last week. After last night, there was nothing that would have kept me from being here tonight.” Jaime met his eyes when Sean looked up and reached out to take his hand.

“Why did you? You didn’t seem like you were going to change your mind last week. You seemed pretty sure about what you wanted.”

“I thought I was.” Jaime paused and ran his free hand over his buzz cut. “Sean, I haven’t had a real relationship in a few years. It’s not because I’m against it or anything. I’m just not going to start something serious just to do it. I don’t
need
to be with someone. But I want to be with you. I just didn’t figure it out as fast as you wanted me to. I know that sucked. I know I shouldn’t have had to lose you and be miserable and have Lexi leave pictures she took of you at rehearsal all over the apartment to figure it out.”

“She did that?”

“It’s really unfair. She hates everyone. When did you brainwash her onto your side?”

“I didn’t know I had.” As far as he remembered, Aleksandra had barely even talked to him.

“You just have no idea how you get under people’s skin, do you?” Jaime slid down the bed so he was lying on his side facing Sean. “I couldn’t even get mad at her for calling me an ass because I agreed with her. I kept asking her how you were doing after every rehearsal until she pointed out that I should ask myself why I cared so much, or why I got so pissed when she told me you were talking to some other guy.”

“She told you I was talking to another guy?” Sean tried to think of another dancer Aleksandra might have seen him talking to, but she’d really only had the chance to see him talk to Travis and Michael. Jaime studied him for a second before groaning.

“She made that up, didn’t she?” Jaime looked at him with a mix of annoyance and hope.

“I can’t even think of where she would have gotten the idea.”

“There was really never another guy?” Jaime asked, like he actually had a reason to need more of a confirmation.

“There was never another guy for
me
.” Sean felt bad for his emphasis when Jaime’s relieved face fell. “Sorry. I know you didn’t really do anything wrong.”

“No.” Jaime shook his head and looked down at their linked hands. “I did. Lexi told me I should have known better. Even before she knew you’d found out. She saw me kiss Juan at the club, and she asked me that night what was wrong with me. When I told her we weren’t serious, she asked if I was sure you knew that. And Alana wouldn’t have told on me if she didn’t know you’d be upset. I should have known how you felt because everyone else did, and I deserved how I felt when Lexi told me some other guy was already going after you and I had lost my chance.”

“You didn’t lose your chance, but I have to know it’s just me, and you’re not going to get drunk and kiss someone else.” Sean knew he had tightened his grip on Jaime’s hand like he could hold him there, but he couldn’t make himself let go as he said it.

“Sean, I know, but it wasn’t because I was drunk. I didn’t realize it would hurt you, but it didn’t mean anything. It was just a stupid drunk kiss on the dance floor with a friend that I didn’t think enough about. You mean something. I get that now. I’m not going to fuck that up.” Jaime squeezed his hand. “I can’t promise I’m going to get everything perfect, but I won’t cheat. You have to know this wasn’t a sign I’m going to cheat.”

“Okay.” Sean nodded. Travis would probably say he was forgiving too quickly, but if he didn’t trust Jaime, it wouldn’t work. Still, he couldn’t help asking. “So you’re still friends with that guy?”