Silent Honor (16 page)

After dinner Peter and Hiroko took Lassie out for a walk and continued the discussion.

“Uncle Tak is very nervous,” she said cautiously to Peter, as they headed home with Lassie. “I suppose he's worried about the war. We all are. We must all try very hard to set a good example.” It was the same tiling someone else had said, and it struck Peter as he listened to her that all the American-born Japanese seemed to feel the same need to prove that they were good guys, and it wasn't their fault. But all Japanese were being identified visually as enemy aliens, no matter where they'd been born. It was incredibly unfair. And it might even be dangerous for Hiroko, who really was a Japanese citizen. He worried about her going back to college. As emotions rose, and people's brothers and boyfriends went to war, her classmates were liable to get angrier and angrier at Hiroko.

“I don't want you to go back if you'll be in any danger,” he said firmly before she left. He was very protective of her, and she was surprised to see, by the look on his face, that he meant it.

“They are only girls.” Hiroko smiled at him. They couldn't do anything to her, except what they had before, hurt her feelings.

“Think about it, Hiroko. You don't have to go back there.”

“You worry too much.” She smiled up at him again. “Like Uncle Tak, I am strong.” But she was also young, and very gentle. And she would not dishonor her father by giving up school, or quitting.

“I know, Bushido,” he teased, as the Shiba barked at a dog somewhere. “Maybe you have too much Bushido for your own good, Miss Takashimaya.” She laughed at him then. It was so easy to be with him. She was so comfortable and so at ease, there were no national differences between them. Their countries were at war, but it didn't mean anything between them. They were simply two people. It was sad, she said quietly, that the world could not be more like them.

He agreed with her, and they walked slowly back to the Tanakas, and as they did, Peter saw one of the neighbors peeking out their window, and looking at them with an angry expression. He couldn't imagine what their problem was, except that maybe the dog had been barking. And then, when he looked at her, he realized what they saw. A Japanese woman, and a Caucasian. It had come to that then. In truth, it had come to that long before, but now it seemed doubly obvious. He wondered, as they walked along, if there would be much of this, if people with Japanese friends would be ostracized or shunned. It was hard to believe that the girl he had just broken up with was echoing more than her own opinions. But even if people ostracized him for his friendship with them, he didn't care. His relationship with Takeo meant far too much to him for him to sacrifice it, and he would risk anything to be near Hiroko.

“What are you thinking, Peter-san?” she asked gently as they passed the last of the neighbors. “You look very serious.” Her English had improved at school, in spite of all the problems and distractions.

“That people are crazy these days. It's dangerous when people get this panicked. You must be careful. Don't go out alone, make sure you're always with Reiko, or Tak, or Ken, or me.” He smiled openly and she laughed at him.

“You will protect me, Peter-san.”

“Only if you do everything I tell you,” he said, feeling like a boy again, as they walked through the cool air, and into the Tanakas' front garden.

“And what will you tell me to do?” She was teasing him, and he loved it.

“This is what I'll tell you to do,” he whispered to her as he pulled her into his arms in the doorway, and then he kissed her. No one was watching them, and they were safe here. And as he had before, he took her breath away, and she did the same for him, and both of them looked slightly disheveled as they walked into the kitchen.

But Reiko and Takeo didn't look as sympathetic to them as they had before, and all Tak would say as he looked at them was that they should be very careful. Peter knew what he meant, nodded, and then left a few minutes later. And her cousins said nothing to her, but she felt their concern as she went upstairs to sleep with Sally.

They were well aware of Peter's relationship with Hiroko by now. No matter how discreet the two young lovers had been, it was obvious that something had changed between them and they had become much closer, particularly since war had broken out. Tak and Reiko hadn't acknowledged it, but they knew, and they didn't disapprove of Peter, but they were afraid for Hiroko. And for the same reasons, they told her the next day to put away her kimonos. This was not a time to draw attention to herself, or
to
remind everyone that she wasn't a nisei. She didn't argue with them, but she was sad when she put them away. Her kimonos were so beautiful and she felt so awkward in Western clothes. With very few exceptions, she thought that most of them were ugly.

But Sally was delighted to see her in Western clothes, and she bought her a pair of saddle shoes for Christmas.

Christmas was quiet for them that year. Takeo took Ken to chop down their own Christmas tree, as he always did, but somehow the entire Japanese community seemed to be keeping very quiet. And day by day, the news was never good. Two days before Christmas, the Japanese took Wake Island. And on Christmas Day, the Japanese took Hong Kong. Even for the Tanakas, it was a quiet day, and Takeo raised an eyebrow when Peter joined them. He appreciated his friendship, but he thought he was making things difficult for himself. Even at the university, in the past two weeks, for Peter's own good, Tak had tried to keep his distance.

“Don't put yourself on the line for us.” Tak said to him quietly that afternoon. “It isn't worth it. Eventually, people will get used to what's happening, but right now tempers are still hot.” But it had to do with more than just him, and he knew it. Peter felt constantly drawn to the Tanakas so he could be close to Hiroko. And however unfortunate the situation may have been, or even dangerous for Peter, Takeo knew that he was sincere and that he loved her.

And on Christmas night, after everyone else had gone to bed, Peter slipped the smallest of silver rings on Hiroko's finger. It was only a symbol of what they felt, and a small tiling. He had bought her a beautiful silk shawl, and some old books of poetry he had found in Japanese, and he had written her a haiku. But he also wanted to give her the ring, as a symbol of what they had now, and hoped to share one day. It was the narrowest of bands with two hearts entwined. It was Victorian and he had found it in an antique shop, and it was so small, he thought that no one would notice.

“You are too good to me, Peter-san,” she said breathlessly, and he kissed her fingers.

“You must not call me that anymore. Tak is right.” She had lost her kimonos, and the privilege of bowing to him, and now she must lose yet another sign of her respect for him, but she did not argue.

“Why is everyone so frightened of clothes and words, and even little girls?” Earlier that day she and Tami had been in a store and someone had made an ugly comment. She and Tami had hurried away, but one of Reiko's friends had told her that in a store down the street where they had always been nothing but hospitable to the Japanese, they had refused to serve them.

“We're Americans, we're not ‘Japs’ “Tami had said, fighting tears, as Hiroko hurried away with her, and she had looked to her older cousin for an explanation, but at first Hiroko had none to give her. She had been shocked by the man's willingness to hurt a child, and she was very angry.

“It's because you are with me, and I am Japanese,” Hiroko had explained to her finally, but even that seemed a paltry explanation. She was barely more than a girl herself, and she was only a woman, not a soldier, or an army.

“People are going to stay frightened for a while, until they forget some of it, and things start to improve. In the meantime, you all have to be very sensible and very careful,” Peter warned her.

“And when they are wise again, may I wear my kimonos?” she asked, amused for a moment by the absurdity of all of it, and he laughed.

“We'll go to Japan one day, and you can wear them all again.” But their dream of his going to visit her father next summer, to meet her family, had been shot down in flames at Pearl Harbor. She had no idea when she would be able to go home again, and thinking about that depressed her. At times, she was so lonely for them, and she had no idea when she'd see them. It made her reach out to Peter all the more, and as he kissed her that night, she wondered what would happen. In June, he would go to war. But until then, they had to seize each precious moment. There would be many of them, and she would string them like beads, to finger until he returned again. And he would return, she prayed, as he kissed her again, and she felt the ring, and promised herself that one day he would visit her parents. In the meantime, all they could do was cling to the present, and wait for the future, together.

Chapter 8

O
N DECEMBER
twenty-ninth, all “enemy aliens” in the western states were ordered to surrender their “contraband,” which included shortwave radios, cameras of any variety and size, binoculars, or weapons. The only confusion came regarding the term “enemy alien,” which would have appeared to mean Japanese nationals, but within hours it became clear that the term meant anyone of Japanese descent, whether citizens or foreigners.

“But that can't be,” Reiko said, as Takeo explained the term to them. “We're Americans, we're not
aliens
.” She looked puzzled.

“Not anymore,” he said grimly. Up until now, being a resident alien had never bothered him. And it hadn't even caused him a problem at Stanford.

But suddenly everything had changed, and like Hiroko, he was an enemy alien. Even more shocking than that, so were his wife and children, all of whom had been born in California.

They collected all the cameras in the family, and he had a pair of binoculars, which he used at Lake Tahoe when they went sailing. They delivered them to the local police station, and he saw several of their neighbors there, and the policeman who took the things from him looked extremely embarrassed.

For Takeo and his family, it was their first taste of reality. And Hiroko began to worry that her staying with them might cause them trouble. She silently decided to stay at St. Andrew's as much as she could. Perhaps it was even dangerous for them to have an “enemy” staying with them. And perhaps even more so for Peter to love one.

But despite their growing fears of reprisals in the area, and panic over attacks from air or sea, Peter asked Tak if he could take Hiroko out on New Year's Eve. It was to be their first official date, and Peter looked extremely formal, and a little nervous, when he asked him.

“You're serious about her, aren't you?” Tak finally asked him, looking worried. He knew he couldn't put off asking him any longer. Peter had acknowledged his own feelings to him long since, but never Hiroko's. And it was time now.

“Yes, I'm very serious about her, Tak.” He admitted it almost proudly and without hesitation. “I tried to run away from it …but I just couldn't…. Every time I saw her I would think about her for days…. She haunted me. I've never known anyone like her.” His eyes told their own tale. But so did Takeo's. He was deeply concerned about both of them. If nothing else, they were cursed with dismal timing.

“She's a sweet girl, but you're both wading into dangerous waters,” he warned. It had only been three weeks since Pearl Harbor, and anti-Japanese feelings were running high. Takeo had already heard of investigations by the FBI, and people he knew being questioned. He didn't want something like that happening to Peter. “You're going to have to be very careful.” It was obvious from what he'd seen that nothing was going to stop them.

“I know that. I wasn't suggesting we go to the USO, or dancing at the Fairmont. One of the assistants in psychology is having a little gathering on New Year's Eve; he invited me and some of the other assistants in our department. It'll be very circumspect and very private.”

Takeo nodded as he listened. In a way, it was a relief for all concerned to acknowledge their relationship, and although Takeo had had serious doubts about it at first, he wasn't so sure now. He had thought it unwise for her to become involved with an American, and he had been acutely aware of his responsibilities to her father. But somehow he couldn't bring himself to object any longer. So many things had changed, so much pain had been caused. If anything, their involvement was more dangerous now than it had been when she first arrived, and yet they had a right to some hope in their lives, and Takeo sensed how intent Peter was on taking care of Hiroko. And what right did he have to deprive them? But he felt a keen responsibility nonetheless to warn them of the dangers. Takeo was frightened now, not only for them, but for his own wife and children.

“Just be careful, for both your sakes,” Takeo urged him again, looking at Peter intently. “And if things don't feel right when you go out, come back home immediately. Don't put yourselves in an awkward position.” God only knew what people would do when driven into a frenzy by fear and national emotion.

“I'll be careful,” Peter assured him, looking at him sadly. “And Tak, this isn't about politics, for either of us. It's about her. I'm American. I love my country. I'm willing to die for it. This isn't about sympathies, it's just about her, and me …and people. … I love her. I'll stand by her.”

“I know that,” Takeo said, looking sorrowfully into the future. Their two nations were at war, it was going to affect the entire world, not just two people. “But it could get more complicated very quickly.”

“I hope not. For her sake. It must be very hard for her, she's the one with divided loyalties. She loves her family, her country, but she likes it here too, and she feels loyal to all of you. It must be difficult for her to be here.” But fortunately, in spite of her father's, and her cousin's, interest in politics she viewed the political issues from a distance. Like most girls her age, she was worried about the people she knew, and loved, and not the ramifications of decisions made by governments. Her vision was limited, as was most everyone's at that point. “Anyway, will you let me take her out?”