Since I Saw You (30 page)

Lin’s phone began to ring. “Excuse me for just a moment,” she said quietly when she saw the caller identification, getting up from the conference table and going to the far side of Ian’s extensive office.

The call was from Emile Savaur, Richard’s partner. Lin took it because she’d been worried by a conversation she’d had with Richard while she’d been in California. His “flu” was not getting better the way it should have if it were a typical bug.

According to Emile, Richard had gotten worse. Emile had taken him to the hospital, and much to his concern, they’d admitted Richard.

“I’ll meet you over at Northwestern Memorial as soon as I finish up with this meeting,” she said. Emile had tried to tell her it wasn’t necessary, but when she insisted, he’d sounded relieved.

“It was Emile calling about Richard St. Claire,” Lin told Lucien when she returned. Lucien was good friends with both Emile and Richard as well, having known the two men since his days in Paris. Everyone seated at the table quieted and listened to Lin. “Emile has taken him to the hospital and they’ve admitted him. They say he has pneumonia.”

“Is it serious?” Lucien asked, his brow creasing in concern.

“It sounds like it,” Lin said. “I’m going to head over to the hospital as soon as we’re done here. I won’t be back. I have class tonight,” she reminded Ian. Her gaze transferred to Kam, who nodded in understanding. Had he guessed that she hoped he’d meet her after her dance class like he had last week?

“I’ll go with you,” Lucien said.

“I’ll call you in a little bit,” Kam told Lin. She gave him a grateful glance. She hated having to leave when she hadn’t seen him for days, but it would just delay their personal reunion a few hours.

The meeting came to an end as Lucien and Lin gathered their things, and the Gersbachs extracted a promise from Kam to go to Geneva for a few days the following week.

•   •   •

“Do you know Richard St. Claire?” Kam asked Ian once they were alone in his office.

Ian nodded. “He’s a nice guy. Young and healthy, too. Seems strange that something like this could happen.”

“Some of the newer respiratory viruses can be dangerously virulent,” Kam replied.

“The meeting went well. You were right: that device is a linchpin, a flagship product, not a means to an end for building capital. You’re going to be able to name your terms with Gersbach and any number of other companies.”

“Thanks,” Kam said, meaning it. He valued Ian’s opinion more than Ian knew. He’d regretted telling him he was going to ask Lin to work with him, even though he was convinced it was the right thing to do. He sat in front of Ian’s desk when Ian took his seat behind it. “Does this mean you’re not pissed at me anymore?”

Ian leaned back in his leather chair, elbows on the arm rests, fingers forming a bridge near his chin. He considered Kam coolly.

“It means that if I were in your shoes, I’d probably be doing the same thing. I might not like the idea of you taking Lin from Noble, but given what you plan, even I have to agree it’s a smart move. She’s lit up over that device. She’s practically glowing over it, and when that happens, Lin is impossible to resist. You two are going to have trouble keeping up with the demands for that watch.”

“You actually think she’ll agree to come with me?”

“I’ve never seen her so excited about a product. She seems even more enthusiastic about you.”

Kam cleared his throat in the charged silence that followed.

Ian gave Kam a pointed, steely glance. “That doesn’t mean part of me won’t be pleased if she turns you down. Still, if she stays with Noble, I hope she does it because it’s what she truly wants, not because she’s worried about being disloyal to me,” Ian conceded.

“She is loyal to you. No doubt about it,” Kam mused, feeling a little defeated at the very idea. There was no way he could compete with the years of experience, family ties, and close working relationship Lin shared with Ian.

Ian grimaced slightly and sat forward, bracing his forearms on his desk.

“Are you doing anything in particular to convince her?”

Kam blinked. “I told you how I plan to incentivize her.”

“Not like work incentives. I mean anything personal to set the atmosphere. Woo her. Are you taking her out to a nice dinner, at least, in order to broach the topic?” Ian persisted when Kam just stared at him in blank bemusement. “It’s a big deal what you’re proposing to do. You should do it right.”

“Are you giving me
hints
for how to convince Lin to work for me?” Kam asked incredulously.

“It looks like someone has to,” Ian muttered under his breath. “Take her out to a nice dinner. Order champagne. Get her some flowers.”

“Flowers?” Kam repeated.

“Yes,” Ian agreed as if warming to the subject. He picked up his phone and began tapping on the screen. “Get her purple lotuses. They’re her favorite. I’ll give you the number of the only florist in town that sells them. The owner grows them specifically for me to get for Lin. They’re extremely rare flowers. I’ve texted you the number of the florist,” he said, setting down his phone. “Kam?” he asked when Kam just sat there, frozen.

A strange wind seemed to be rushing in his ears. A vision of all those carefully preserved lotus flowers sitting in Lin’s bedside table drawer flashed before his eyes.

Lin had said she’d been in love before. When Kam had asked her what had happened she’d said . . .

. . .
Nothing. Absolutely nothing. He was someone else’s, never mine.

He heard her voice as if she’d just spoken. She’d sounded sad. Resigned. If there was one woman he knew who could contain her sadness and pain and face each day with a determined smile, it was Lin. He’d always sensed that trace of sadness to her, a hint of loneliness. He just hadn’t fully realized the origins of it until now.

Lin was in love with Ian. Of course she was. She’d never revealed her secret because she’d sensed Ian didn’t return her feelings.

She was attracted to him—Kam—because he resembled Ian.

“Kam?” Ian repeated, bringing him out of his analytic trance. “Are you all right? You looked like you’d seen a ghost all of a sudden.”

“Yeah. I’m fine. Thanks for the advice,” Kam mumbled as he stood. It all seemed so obvious now. Everyone said they’d never witnessed loyalty and devotion like Lin showed Ian. Ian was handsome, powerful, sophisticated, rich, and brilliant—the very epitome of what a woman would find attractive. She’d first met him when she’d been an impressionable teenager. It was no surprise she idolized him from the start. An entire generation of people Ian’s age and younger idolized him, not only for all he’d accomplished, but also for his influence in the social media and electronic-gaming sectors.

Ian had given Lin those flowers over the years, and Lin had carefully saved and preserved them near where she’d dreamed night after night. Those dried flowers were the only visible symbol of a passion she’d vowed to keep hidden.

She should have told him. Didn’t he have a right to know why she found him attractive? Was the hesitance he sensed in her at times inspired by guilt on her part? Did she know she was wrong in using him as a substitute for another man?

He bid Ian good-bye and left his office. Ian had been right. Kam
had
seen a ghost of sorts. It’d been himself.
He’d
been the phantom in his affair with Lin, a blurry, shadowy facsimile of the man she loved.

•   •   •

Lin’s phone began to ring as she walked through the main lobby at Northwestern Memorial. She’d seen Richard and Emile, and both of them were in reasonably good spirits. Much to her relief, she learned that Richard’s prognosis was very good.

She suppressed her disappointment when she saw it wasn’t Kam calling.

“Ian? Hi,” she said into the phone, pausing in front of a floor-to-ceiling window near the lobby exit.

“How’s Richard?” he asked.

“He’ll be fine. A pretty severe infection had set in, so the doctor recommended a course of IV antibiotics. That was why it necessitated an inpatient stay. They say he’s going to recover quickly, though. Lucien just left and I was on my way out.”

“Are you coming back to the office?”

“I have my class tonight,” Lin reminded him. She was hoping Kam would meet her there.

“Sure, I understand,” he said distractedly. “It’s just that I wanted to speak to you about something.”

“I’ll come back then.”

“No . . . no, that’s not necessary,” Ian said. She sensed his preoccupation.

“What is it, Ian?”

“I’d rather not broach the topic on the phone, but I suppose I should bring it up now before Kam mentions it to you.”

“What?” Lin asked, puzzled by his manner.

“Kam plans to ask you to work for him. Not just for him. With him. He wants you to be a full partner in Reardon Technologies, his new company.”

Lin just stared blindly out the window at a row of cabs waiting at the curb.

“You’re surprised?” Ian asked after a pause.

“To put it mildly,” she replied hollowly. It suddenly felt very hard to move her lungs. A tingling sensation started on her hands and feet. “How . . . how long has he been planning this?”

“According to him, the idea has been coming on ever since he met you. He has an enormous amount of respect for you, Lin,” Ian said quietly. “I think he realized how much he needs you to make this company fly.”

Needs you to make his company fly.
Is that what all of this had been about? Had her seduction been a means to acquire her for his business dynasty?

“I . . . I don’t know what to say,” Lin mumbled. She felt numb.

“I can tell it’s coming to you as quite a shock,” Ian said. “The only reason I mentioned it before Kam had a chance to is that it came to my attention that you might turn him down out of loyalty to me. To Noble Enterprises. I wanted you to know that whatever you decide, I’ll be behind you. Kam is willing to offer you things that I can’t. He’s willing to offer you things most business owners would never consider.”

“You make it sound like you want me to leave,” Lin said, feeling stung and confused by the news.

“No. That’s not it at all. Nothing would make me happier than if you took your time with the decision and came to the conclusion that Noble is where you want to remain. You know how much I value you. At least I hope you do. But the fact remains: Kam’s offer is highly generous. I can tell you love the product. With Kam’s brilliance and your business savvy, you two would be unstoppable.”

The silence roared in her ears.

“Just think about it, Lin,” Ian continued, his tone warmer than usual. “More than you’ve thought about the dozens of other offers you’ve gotten over the years that you’ve turned down. You and I were going to discuss this week the relocation of Noble to London, at least for a short time period. That would certainly change up your life as well. If anything, it’s another factor you’ll need to consider in making your decision.”

“Yes. I have a lot to think about. Thank you for telling me your thoughts on the matter, Ian,” she said, glad to hear that her voice sounded even.

“I’m available if you need to toss things around. I’m also flexible in regard to making your position at Noble as comfortable for you with the location change as I can. This isn’t about me not wanting you, Lin. You’re the
best
damn executive I’ve had, or will ever have. I can say that without a doubt of ever changing my mind. More importantly, you’re a good friend. I care about you. I want whatever you want. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” Lin managed.

She signed off with Ian and put her phone away. She just stared out the window for a stretched moment.

I want whatever you want.

What if she didn’t know what she wanted, though? Just minutes ago, she would have said she wanted what she had with Kam to flourish and grow, but on a personal basis, not a professional one. Or at least primarily on a personal basis. She really hadn’t ever considered being
business
partners with him.

The realization that was probably what Kam had in mind all along made her feel like she’d been dropped down a dark, fifty-foot hole with no ladder.

S
he went home that night instead of to her dance class, trying to absorb everything that Ian had told her, trying to decode what it all meant. She’d already decided she wasn’t going to call Kam until she’d thought things through and gained some perspective.

It surprised her the next morning, however, to discover that he hadn’t tried to call her, either. That was odd. He’d said he was going to call her. Before her conversation with Ian, she’d assumed they would be seeing one another.

Not that she relished the idea of seeing him now, but it just seemed strange that he’d avoided her as well.

She spent a highly distracted day at work. At around four o’clock, however, she realized she couldn’t keep avoiding Kam. They had the meeting scheduled with two executives from Stunde Watches tonight at the restaurant Festa. Lin had yet to even brief Kam about Stunde.

“Has Kam come into the office to see Ian or called?” Lin asked Maria, poking her head out of her office.

“As a matter of fact, I just got off the phone with him,” Maria said, setting down her pen. “He says to tell you he’ll meet you at Festa at seven.”

Irritation spiked through Lin at his distance handling of the matter, but so did confusion. “That won’t do,” she murmured. “Can you call him back and ask him to meet me at six thirty at the bar? We should at least touch base about Stunde before we meet with Kyle Preston and Nina Patel.”

Maria rang her a few minutes later and told her that Kam had agreed to six thirty. Again, she experienced bemusement that he hadn’t asked to speak with her personally.

That night Lin dressed with extreme care for their last meeting with the luxury watchmakers. She still hadn’t decided precisely what she wanted to say to Kam, but had already determined they should stick to business before and during the meeting. She’d call him out about his tactics for gaining her trust and interest after everything professional was over and done.

How dare he play with my emotions this way?
she fumed silently for the thousandth time. He wanted her for his business and so he’d forced a physical relationship in order to secure his place in her life? Well, not
forced
precisely, she conceded irritably as she zipped up her dress that evening and closely studied her reflection in the bathroom mirror. She’d been more than eager to go to bed with him that first night, and progressively more enthusiastic every time since.

She’d loved every second of his primal, powerful lovemaking.

He just wanted me for his business.

But he could have wanted me for
me
as well, couldn’t he
?
A man couldn’t fake passion like Kam had shown,
another part of her argued.

Now you are kidding yourself. Of course a man can make lust look like true feeling. Every day women are fooled into thinking sex means caring.

Kam’s not most men, though. He’s brutally honest.

He didn’t tell you what he was planning, though, did he?

Disgusted by her internal battle, she forced herself to focus on the moment. She’d just get tonight over with. After dinner, she had no choice but to confront Kam and try to discern the truth in him. She was admittedly scared of what that truth might be.

Taking a deep breath, she lifted her chin in preparation for battle. She wasn’t displeased with her appearance. None of the cracks in her armor were showing on the surface. Her hair was styled in an elegant partial upsweep with loose curls falling down her back. She wore a silk sarong print dress that left one shoulder bare, the feminine ruffles of the skirt tempered with a black leather belt that echoed the Reardon watch. She’d toyed with wearing the stunning pearls Kam had bought her, but no. Those were just another example of his unfair influence on her heart. The watch, she wore because it was business . . .

. . . and this
was
a business dinner, no matter how Kam had tried to alter the playing field to suit him. If there was one thing Lin could rely on, it was her professional persona. Calm. Charming. Polished. She’d rely on that persona tonight, just like she’d depended on it for years to survive.

•   •   •

She arrived at the restaurant bar before him and took a seat in a sleek upholstered chair at a cocktail table. Her anxiety grew as she waited. She sensed his presence before she saw his tall form approaching in the corner of her eye. Several heads turned to admire him as he walked toward her. He may not customarily wear suits, but he looked good in them . . .
extremely
good, wearing them like he did his casual clothing—like a second skin on his toned, athletic frame. His face remained impassive when their gazes locked across the crowded bar. She waited for that gleam of warmth and arousal she’d grown used to seeing, but his glance remained as cool as his expression.

“Thanks for meeting with me early,” she said neutrally when he took a seat next to her at the table.

“Ian told me that he spoke to you about the position. I’m furious at him for doing it, although I understand why he did,” Kam added grudgingly.

She blinked in surprise. There it was: his ever-present, blunt honesty.

“Don’t worry. I know you aren’t planning on accepting my offer,” Kam said, his eyes flashing.

“How can you know that when I—” she broke off when a waiter approached. They gave their drink orders, both of them tight-lipped.

“I’m not sure this is a good time to discuss it,” Lin said evenly once the waiter had left. She sounded calm, but her heartbeat had started to pound in her ears. “I want to tell you a few key things about Stunde, and Nina and Kyle are going to be here any minute.”

“Right. The top secret briefing.”

She simmered at his sarcasm. “I’m just trying to get through this evening without any major mishaps.”

She felt her cheeks heating when he studied her closely for a silent moment.

“Who’s going to make a mishap?” he finally queried, leaning forward with his elbows on the table. His eyes were like ice chips. Before she knew what to expect, he reached for her hand, flipping her palm up.

“Don’t,” she whispered heatedly when she realized what he was doing. He expertly tapped on the tiny screen. He looked up at her with a grim smile when he quickly scanned her vitals, which—
damn it
—indicated a marked escalated stress response like a neon sign.

“What’s wrong, Lin, not as cool and collected as you’re leading everyone in this snooty restaurant to believe?”

She gritted her teeth in anger and yanked back her wrist. “
That’s
none of your business.”

“If I were you, I’d take off the device then,” Kam replied. “I mean it,” he said and gave her a defiant glare, a trace of steel to his voice. “I don’t want those people gaping at what’s going on inside of you.”

“But
you
have that right?” she asked angrily, removing the watch and putting it in her purse. Maybe he was right, as annoyed as that realization made her. They’d gotten through the first meeting with the Gersbachs without the device in evidence, they could do the same with the Stunde representatives. “And if I’m not calm, it’s with good reason. You’ve been messing with me, Kam,” she accused, unable to stop herself. “You’ve had ulterior motives in sleeping with me.”

His sharp bark of laughter made her jump slightly. She gaped at him, aghast at his manner. “
I
had ulterior motives in sleeping with
you
? That’s rich.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” she demanded.

“Lin?”

She blinked dazedly at the sound of the woman’s hesitant voice.

“Nina, Kyle. I didn’t see you arrive,” she said, standing and shaking hands with the Stunde executives. She forced herself into her professional role, difficult as it was, especially with Kam’s scowl and surliness fully in evidence when she made introductions.

Fortunately, the dinner was a moderate success, despite Lin’s confusion and anger and Kam’s inexplicable coolness. At least nothing was ruined, and Kyle and Nina were very interested in the product. Kam’s manner during dinner segued from his perplexing anger at her to being aloof and distant, but since Nina and Kyle were unfamiliar with his typical presentation, they seemed not to notice anything unduly remarkable. Like the Gersbachs before them, they seemed to assume he was an idiosyncratic, somewhat withdrawn genius. He answered their questions with his typical succinctness, his incising intelligence impossible to hide despite his preoccupation. By the time the meeting and luxurious meal came to a conclusion, Lin was feeling very raw and abraded, her façade worn thin by Kam’s palpable chill. She didn’t think it was her imagination that his coolness was aimed exclusively at her.

Why was he giving
her
the cold shoulder? Wasn’t she the one who had a right to be miffed, given the circumstances?

She turned toward him on the sidewalk after Kyle and Nina got into the first cab and it drove away.

“You are such an arrogant ass,” she hissed furiously, unable to contain her summation of his character a second longer.

Fury and confusion pulsed through her when she saw the trace of sarcasm cross his handsome face. He glanced down at her contemptuously.

“You really do turn that act on and off like a light switch, don’t you?”

“What is
wrong
with you?” she grated out, stunned by his disdain.

His lip curled into a snarl. Suddenly it seemed impossible to Lin that she’d thought he’d been cool since Kyle and Nina had arrived. He wasn’t just simmering with emotion. He was about to boil over.

“Wrong with me? Maybe it turns my stomach to watch you smile and charm and look like a beautiful doll all night long. You always have the perfect line on the tip of your tongue, don’t you? Does anybody ever see the
real
you, Lin? I wonder if
you
even know who she is.”

“You son of a—”

He caught her flying hand in midair. A shock resounded in her flesh. She gasped in disbelief. His blazing eyes burned right through her. She’d never told herself to do it, but she’d been about to slap him before he’d stopped her. Dozens of diners would have witnessed the spectacle she made through the glass windows of the posh restaurant. She’d never lost control in public like this before. She rarely did in private . . .

Kam’s nostrils flared in anger. Lin’s lungs burned. She couldn’t draw air. He jerked her wrist and her body thumped against his. Electricity seemed to jump from him to her. Against her will, she felt herself respond to his long, hard length.

“So the polished little kitten has claws. Well, that’s a
start
at honesty, I guess,” Kam muttered through a clenched jaw. His remark bounced off her; she was still momentarily stunned by her actions. He put out his hand to hail the next waiting cab. Lin said nothing when he held open the door for her. She couldn’t believe he’d goaded her so easily. Her entire body seemed to vibrate with chaotic emotion.

Kam slid into the seat next to her and tersely gave the driver the address to his apartment before he slid the plastic divider between driver and passenger seats closed. Lin turned to him, her mouth opening to accuse him of being a manipulative bastard. Kam opened his hands along each side of her jaw, holding her in place, and seized her mouth in an angry, searing kiss.

All her confusion about her desires, all the longing she’d felt ever since she left Kam’s arms on Monday morning, all the bubbling emotion she’d been feeling since Ian had told her about Kam’s plans, all of that and more found a channel in erupting lust and need. It roared to the surface, both a threat and a potent thrill that was impossible to resist.

Still, she was outraged. She wrenched her mouth free after a moment and tore his hands from her face. Their gazes clashed in the city-lit cab. She saw the dangerous glint in his light eyes.

“Do you honestly think I only want you because I want you to work for me? I wish that were true. I haven’t had a moment of peace since the first second you walked into that restaurant,” he growled ominously, sounding furious at that fact.

“Damn you, Kam,” she whispered, affected by his raw admission whether she wanted to be or not.

“Damned is right,” he assured her before he bent to her again. This time, his kiss was every bit as dark and dangerous, but it was more controlled. It was the devil’s seduction. His tongue claimed her mouth, sweeping it everywhere. He moved his lips in a sensual enticement, sucking at her, pulling her in to him in a way that was impossible to deny. Lin tangled her tongue with his, angry, aroused, overwhelmed. He wrapped a hand at her waist and pulled her closer against his hard body, and Lin knew she was something else.

Lost.

Kam pulled her after him once he’d distractedly handed a pleased cabdriver a twenty for a six-dollar fare. He pulled her through the lobby like he thought he was evacuating a fire, but going in the wrong direction. The doorman behind the desk greeted her by name when they arrived, and Lin gave a breathless, unintelligible reply. She’d been there countless times to Ian’s penthouse. Kam immediately swept down on her without waiting for the elevator doors to close. Despite the fact that she was aware of the doorman’s eyes watching them curiously as they got onto the mahogany-paneled elevator, she turned her face up and put her arms out to receive Kam’s hot, demanding kiss. She melted against his length. The doors closed and she felt herself rising, lifted on the steam of single-minded desire.

Kam’s mouth burned her throat. He reached beneath her wrap and began to loosen the single strap of her dress. She arched against him when his hand brushed a prickling nipple, tempting him to touch her. She moaned and nipped at his snarling mouth when he filled his palm with her breast, then plucked at the aching nipple with his fingertips. He bent and ravaged her mouth again.

The elevator doors dinged open. She broke their kiss and whimpered his name when he didn’t appear to notice, but just continued to consume her. When the doors started to close, he moved away from her quick as a lightning strike, halting the doors and pulling her after him.