Sinners On Tour 05 Double Time (20 page)

Several days later, standing in the dressing room of the venue in Indianapolis, Trey held his cell phone in an iron grip. “What do you mean, you’re stuck in traffic?” Trey asked Brian. “We have to be onstage in twenty minutes.”

“It can’t be helped, Trey. I didn’t order a car fire on the interstate in an attempt to annoy everyone.”

“If you’d quit fucking running off to L.A. every frickin’ night—”

“I have other obligations now, Trey. I know the word ‘responsibility’ isn’t in your vocabulary, but maybe you should think about someone other than yourself for five goddamned minutes.”

Trey hated arguing with Brian. The man had a skill for laying on a guilt trip. “I’m not thinking of myself. I’m thinking about those twenty thousand fans who paid to see us perform and who expect us to be onstage at ten o’clock. Not ten thirty. Not eleven. Ten.”

“So stall them for half an hour. I’ll be there. I’m just going to be late.”

“Stall them? What are we going to do? Put Jace onstage to do his knock-knock joke routine?”

“You’ll think of something.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Trey caught sight of Reagan laughing with (or at) Eric. “You know what? We’ll just start without you.”

Trey hung up before Brian could say anything else. Trey found Sed drinking a beer with several fans who’d scored VIP passes from a local radio station.

“Brian’s going to be late,” Trey told him.

“Late?” Sed glanced at the clock. “Like how late?”

“At least thirty minutes.”

“Fuck. The crowd will go berserk by then.” Sed set his beer down and headed toward the dressing room exit. The last of the opening bands was finishing up their set. Trey knew what Sed’s plan was. Try to keep the Kickstart onstage longer. Trey had a better idea. At least he thought it was great. He started after Sed.

One of the fans grabbed Trey’s arm. “Is Master Sinclair okay?” she asked, her eyes full of concern.

“Yeah, he’s just stuck in traffic. No worries.”

By the time Trey caught up with him, Sed was talking to Kickstart’s soundboard operator. The guy shook his head and pointed at his watch. Sed wiped a hand over his face and stared up at the rigging over the stage.

Onstage, Kip Forrester, the lead singer of Kickstart, yelled, “Are you ready for Sinners to rock your faces off?”

The crowd roared and then followed Kip in chanting, “Sinners, Sinners, Sinners.” He was doing his job as a great opening act by getting the crowd pumped up for the headlining band.

Trey took Sed by the arm and led him to a quieter hallway behind the stage. “If we make them wait an hour before we start the show, they’ll probably riot.”

“That’s what I was thinking. William says there’s no way Kickstart can do another encore. Any ideas?”

“Reagan can fill in for Brian.”

Sed looked at him as if he’d said, “Reagan can walk on water.”

“Just to get us started,” Trey clarified. “As soon as Brian gets here, he can take over.”

“I don’t think our fans will like that much. Most of them come just to see Brian.” He paused. “And me.”

Sed was never short in self-confidence.

“Do you have a better idea?” Trey asked.

“Yeah, I do. We’ll tell Brian he can’t go back to L.A. after every show. Put our foot down with him. This is bullshit. I thought he was going to pass out onstage in Saint Louis.”

Trey scoffed. “Good luck with that, Sed. He’s not going to give up seeing his family for anything.”

“I understand where he’s coming from, but we only have one more week on the road. He fucking looks like the walking dead. He’s stretched too thin and not doing a good job at anything. Not performing. Not taking care of himself or his family.”

Even though Trey was pissed at Brian, he didn’t like anyone saying bad things about him. Not even Sed. “He’s doing his best.”

Sed snorted derisively. “You don’t really believe that.”

“He’s just trying to do too much right now.”

“And failing at everything. Go see if Reagan is up for this idea. We’ll try it. We might have to do the entire show twice, but at least we won’t have an out-of-control crowd.” Sed rubbed his jaw. “I hope.”

Trey grinned, his heart drumming with excitement. “She’ll do great. Everyone will love her.”

Sed chuckled. “I think you’re a tad partial, Trey.”

Trey hurried back to the dressing room and found Reagan chattering at Jace, who listened intently to her entire one-sided conversation and nodded occasionally but said nothing.

Trey moved in behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He probably should have okayed this plan with her before bringing it up with Sed, but how could she refuse? And if she did, Trey was sure he could get his way with very little effort. He knew she kind of liked him.

Reagan covered his hands with hers and pressed them against her belly, encouraging him to hold her more tightly. “Are you ready to go onstage?” she asked.

“Are you?”

She laughed. “Yeah, I can’t wait to do my first show in two weeks. I’m getting anxious.”

“I meant are you ready to go onstage tonight?”

She turned around in his arms and gave him a questioning look.

“Brian’s going to be late, so I thought you could stand in for him for a couple of songs until he gets here.”

“No way! I haven’t rehearsed. I’d make a total fool of myself.”

“You know all of Sinners’ songs. You’ll do great.”

“Trey, I can’t do this.”

“I already told Sed you’d do it. Don’t make me look like an ass.”

Her eyebrows drew together and she pinned him with a heated stare. “You’re being one, why not look like one?”

Trey tilted his head just so and held her gaze with his. “Please.”

“Don’t ‘please’ me, Trey Mills. That look will not get you everything you want.”

“Even if I want to please you?”

Her lips twisted as she tried to suppress a smile, and he knew she was going to cave. “You always please me,” she said.

“So you’ll do it?” he pressed.

“Sure. Why not?”

He kissed her neck and murmured in her ear, “You’re getting the extra-large tongue stud tonight, Reagan Elliot.”

“You’re supposed to sweeten the deal before I agree to your terms, not after.”

“Are you objecting?”

She wrapped both arms around him and stared up into his eyes. “Absolutely not.”

“I guess we’d better let the stage crew know there’s been a slight change in the show tonight.”

Eric tapped Trey on the shoulder. “Uh, Trey, I think Reagan is great and all, but I don’t think this is the best idea.”

Trey lifted an eyebrow at him. “What would be your best idea?”

“To wait for Brian.”

“They’re going to hate me, aren’t they?” Reagan said. “I’d hate me if I was waiting to see Master Sinclair perform and some tomboy stepped out on stage in his place.”

“They’ll love you, Reagan. I guarantee it.”

***

Reagan didn’t feel right borrowing Brian’s guitar without his permission, but his equipment was already tuned up and synced to the amplifiers, so switching out guitars now would have put undue stress on the sound crew. She was excited to get her first real taste of the limelight, but she could hear the restlessness of the crowd. Uneasiness settled in the pit of her stomach. What was she doing here? And why did she always do exactly what Trey wanted her to do? She couldn’t even get mad at him about it. Not when she so eagerly did his bidding and then benefited from his happiness. Because a happy Trey was a generous Trey.

Trey rubbed her back and smiled at her. “You ready?”

“Are you sure about this? I don’t know ‘Betrayed’ very well. It hasn’t been out very long.”

“You played it perfectly five minutes ago.”

Yeah, but there hadn’t been forty-thousand eyeballs on her five minutes ago. Rebekah gave them their cue to enter the stage, and Trey gave Reagan an encouraging squeeze before he climbed the steps and crossed the stage to its far side. Jace gave her a set of knuckles in the shoulder and followed Trey. Sed, who stood behind her, nudged her toward the stage. She found the taped X on the stage where she was supposed to stand in front of Brian’s stomp pad. She knew the notes but had no idea which amplifier she was supposed to switch to and when. This was going to be a disaster. Trey owed her a lot more than a session with his talented tongue to make up for this.

Eric thudded the bass drum and Reagan jumped as if it was a shotgun blast. Jace’s bass line entered and she found proper fingering on the strings of Brian’s guitar. Her head started swimming and she realized she had forgotten to breathe. She gasped for air and played the first chord. Bright lights hit her in the face and she winced, but she somehow kept playing. She’d been fooling herself into thinking she was half as good as Master Sinclair. Every slight variation in tone made her cringe. No one else seemed to notice. The crowd, what little of it she could see with the blinding lights in her face, was enthusiastic for the music. They didn’t seem to notice that someone else was playing the role of their favorite guitarist. Sed entered the stage and the audience roared their approval. He paced the stage as he sang, lifting his hands to the roof and getting the crowd to mimic his motions.

Reagan glanced across the stage at Trey, who nodded at her in encouragement with a huge smile on his face. Okay, this wasn’t so bad. She could do this. Her eyes began to adjust to the bright lights, but the heat coming off them was brutal. Sweat slickened her lower back and the nape of her neck. When the solo approached, she wasn’t sure if she should mimic Brian and head for the ego riser at the front of the stage or just stay put and hope the crowd didn’t notice Brian had sprung a set of boobs since his last performance.

Trey headed for the front of the stage and nodded his head in that direction to get Reagan’s feet moving from where they’d rooted themselves into the stage. She stubbed her toe on a foot pedal but somehow managed not to fall flat on her face as she joined Trey on the ego riser. He leaned against her, just as he did when he played with Brian, and an undeniable connection flowed between them. She’d never experienced anything like it. The feeling of oneness was even more pronounced than the one she felt when they made love. She closed her eyes and let the music carry her away with Trey. She might have been lost in that sweet nirvana forever if a shoe hadn’t whacked her dead in the forehead. She faltered and stepped back off the riser instinctually. If Sed hadn’t been there to steady her, she would have fallen on her ass. She finished the solo near the back of the stage. Getting hit with a shoe had hurt, but more than that, she felt utterly humiliated. Someone nudged her arm and she opened her eyes to Trey’s concerned expression.

“Are you okay?” he mouthed.

She didn’t know. She’d suffered far worse injuries falling off skateboards, but this had stung more than her pain receptors. It had stung her pride. The fans didn’t want to listen to her play. She didn’t blame them. And she was certain Exodus End’s fans would react the same way when they saw her trying to replace Max.

The song ended and, without waiting for instructions or looking at anyone, Reagan removed Brian’s guitar. She handed it to Jake on her way backstage. She could hear Sed talking to the crowd, but she wasn’t really interested in his words. He said something about kicking the ass of whoever threw that shoe. And a bright new talent in the guitar world. Someone to watch out for. Someone to throw shoes at, he meant.

She’d almost made it to the door that led to the dressing rooms backstage when Brian burst through the door and she staggered backwards. He steadied her with both hands.

“They actually started without me? I can’t fucking believe this,” he said.

“You have nothing to worry about, Master Sinclair. Your adoring audience awaits,” she said and jerked out of his grip before racing to Sinners’ empty dressing room.

She went straight for her cell phone and dialed Ethan. He was there. He was always there. He listened to her tirade about the entire incident from before the show until the instant she’d called him. And then he listened to the confession of her fears. And then her discourse of self-pity. And finally her indignation at being treated that way for doing someone a favor. After she’d unloaded all of her feelings, Ethan said, “Are you ready to give up and come home then?”

“No, I’m not ready to come home. You don’t think one little catastrophe is going to make me give up this dream, do you?”

“Nope, but with all that bitching, I thought maybe you’d changed your mind about what you wanted.”

She wished he was there so she could glare at him. “I just needed someone to talk to.”

“And where is that wonderful boyfriend of yours?”

“He’s onstage right now.”

“Does he know you call me every time you have a problem?”

“If you don’t want me to call you anymore, I won’t.”

“I do want you to call me, Reagan. I just wondered if he knew.”

“When he’s around, the last thing on my mind is my stupid little problems.”

“And the first thing on your mind?”

She grinned to herself. “His tongue.”

Ethan chuckled. “I bet. So other than getting hit with a shoe, how is everything going? Are you learning how to be a rock star?”

“Not a very good one,” she admitted.

Sed had asked the entire band to be there when he confronted Brian. They were there, but not a one of them looked the least bit happy about it. Trey felt sick to his stomach. He already knew what Brian would choose. It wasn’t them.

Brian yawned as he came out of the bedroom with his carry-on bag slung over one shoulder. He paused when he noticed his bandmates blocking his route off the bus.

“I called and cancelled your flight,” Sed said.

Trey wasn’t sure if Sed was bluffing, but it seemed a pretty extreme measure even for Sed—king of extreme measures.

“You did what?” Brian asked, his weariness instantly replaced with rage.

“You’re not going back to L.A. tonight.”

“Get out of my way,” Brian demanded.

“You look like shit, dude,” Eric said. “We all think you should stay on the bus tonight and get some rest. You can go back to L.A. the day after tomorrow when we have three days between shows instead of just one. And then we have two more back-to-back shows before our week off. You can see them as much as you want then.”

“When we’re not rehearsing for the new tour,” Sed added.

“Don’t pull this shit with me right now,” Brian said. “It’s the last thing I need.”

“Could Myrna come see you instead?” Jace asked. “Bring the baby with her?”

“Malcolm is too young to travel.” The hopeless look on his face was like a knife to Trey’s heart. Trey had been so caught up with Reagan, he’d failed his best friend. Brian shouldered a lot of burden right now and Trey hadn’t even bothered to talk to him about it. When had they gone from a friendship where they shared everything to a couple of guys who just hung out with each other very occasionally?

Trey took Brian by one arm and pushed him into the bedroom. He caught Sed’s puzzled expression just before he closed the door in his face.

“You’re not going to talk me out of leaving,” Brian said. “I have to go back tonight. I promised Myrna.”

“Does she realize how exhausted you are?” Trey asked. He knew Myrna. She wouldn’t want Brian to wear himself down like this.

“I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine, Brian. You can’t keep going like this. Do you want to cancel the rest of the tour dates? I’ll side with you no matter what. Just tell me what you want to do.”

“I want to hold my son.” His hand was trembling when he pressed his fingertips to his forehead.

Then that’s what he was going to do. “I’ll contact Jerry,” Trey said. “Tell him to call off the last three shows.”

Brian shook his head. “No. We need to finish out the tour. I can do this for another week.”

“And then what are you going to do? We go back on the road just one week after this tour ends.”

“You don’t think I know that?” Trey felt the crack in Brian’s voice in his chest.

Trey sighed. “You can’t keep this up, Brian. What does Myrna say about this crazy schedule you’re keeping?”

Brian lowered his gaze. “She tries to be strong when I leave. Says she and Malcolm will miss me, but they’ll be fine while I’m gone.”

“Jessica and Aggie are still helping her out, aren’t they?”

“Yeah.”

“Dare?”

“Yeah, everyone’s great. Maybe they are fine when I’m gone. Maybe what I really want is for them to need me more.”

Trey squeezed his shoulder. “Hey. Don’t say that. They need you. I know for a fact that Myrna cries when you’re gone. She misses you so much more than she’s letting on.”

Brian’s breath caught and he shoved Trey aside as he reached for the doorknob. Trey probably shouldn’t have told him that Myrna cried. He grabbed Brian’s arm again and hauled him away from the door.

“Trey, I have to go. I’m not going to be like my father. I promised myself that I’d always be there for them both. I’m not going to let them wonder if they’re important to me. Or if I love them. I’m going to tell them to their faces every goddamn day.”

Now they were making progress. Brian’s father had been a famous guitarist while Brian had been growing up. Malcolm O’Neil had used touring as an excuse to ignore his family, and he’d never been there for Brian when he’d needed him. “You’re not like your father, Brian.”

“But I could be. It would be a lot fucking easier if I was.” Brian pressed his fists against his temples and took a deep breath.

“I know you, Brian. You’d give up the band before you’d do that to your family.”

“It’s crossed my mind.”

Trey’s stomach dropped. “What?”

“Leaving Sinners.”

“You don’t want to make music anymore?”

“Yeah, I do. I haven’t figured out how to do both. If something has to give…”

Trey didn’t want to even think about the possibility. “Have you talked to Myrna about any of this?”

Brian hesitated and then shook his head. Trey took his cell phone out of his pocket and dialed Myrna’s number. She answered on the first ring. “Trey? Is something wrong with Brian?”

“No. The band is trying to talk Brian into staying here for the night instead of going back to L.A. He’s so burnt out, but he wants to go home.”

“I already told him to stay there tonight. Malcolm and I will be fine without him for a couple of days. He shouldn’t worry about us so much.”

“I know you’re being strong for him, Myr, but he needs to hear how hard you’re struggling without him so he can be all angsty and depressed, but at least he’ll stop trying so hard to prove that he’s not going to be like his father.”

“Is that what he thinks?” Myrna asked. “That he’s going to be a bad father? He’s a wonderful father. A wonderful husband. How could he think otherwise? Did I do something to make him feel that way?”

“I don’t think so, Myrna.” Trey glanced over at Brian who had his arms crossed over his chest and was staring daggers at him. Yeah, it probably wasn’t his place to force Brian to talk to his wife, but Trey couldn’t stand to see him like this. Brian needed to tell her these things. She could handle it. And Trey needed to keep this band together. It meant everything to him.

“Is he there?” Myrna asked. “Can I talk to him?”

“Yeah, he’s here. He’s pretty pissed off at me right now, so make sure you remind him that I got in his business because he’s being a douche.”
And
because
I
love
him
, he added silently.

“Thanks, Trey. I’m glad you’re there for him. I figured he was having a harder time than he was letting on, but he’s always so happy when he’s home. I didn’t know he was struggling.”

Trey handed the phone to Brian. “She wants to talk to you.”

He snatched the phone out of Trey’s hand. Trey gave Brian’s shoulder a squeeze before he left the bedroom and gave him some privacy.

The guys were still standing in the corridor, watching the bedroom door as if they expected it to explode at any moment.

“Is he staying?” Sed asked.

“Don’t know,” Trey said. “He’s talking to Myrna.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Sed asked.

“I’m sure. No matter what he decides to do tonight, we have to support him,” Trey said. “Even if that means we have to cancel the rest of the tour.”

Sed opened his mouth to speak and Jace elbowed him in the ribs. “You’re right,” Jace said.

“And we might have to cancel the tour with Exodus End, too,” Trey added.

They all looked at him as if he was insane. “You don’t mean that, Trey,” Sed said. “You know what touring with Exodus End will mean for our careers.”

“Yeah, I do. If we push Brian too hard, he’ll leave the band. And Sinners isn’t Sinners without Master Sinclair.”