Slave to the Sheikh: (7 page)

CHAPTER EIGHT

              A few weeks later, my suspicions were confirmed in the worst way, and with the worst timing, although, there really was never quite a perfect moment to receive bad news.               

By some unspoken agreement, Amir and I had never discussed what happened that day in the garden, or the events that had led up to our angry coupling.  I’d just decided I would trust him to do as he’d promised, and that he would eventually make things right, whatever that meant.

The initial phase of the excavation was underway, and I was now expected to return to my home university for the start of the Fall semester when I would resume my teaching duties. While classes had yet to begin, I had already postponed my return trip by more than a week, but I couldn’t do that for much longer.  In another two weeks, the semester would be underway, and my butt needed to be walking into my lecture hall when it did.

Of course, I would continue to supervise the excavation of Dilmun remotely, making periodic trips to Sharjah, but I wouldn’t return for any extensive period until the Fall term ended, and even then I would only remain at the excavation site for a month.

              Amir and I had never discussed our affair in terms of the future, so when he’d spoken of making things right, I really had no idea of what that meant for me exactly.  Of course, I was not thrilled with the idea of him being involved with me, while he planned to marry another woman. That thought alone, twisted my stomach into a dozen knots.  At the same time, it would have been foolish for me to expect a future with Amir.  The pain that accompanied the very real and impending end to our affair had hurt so much that I simply threw myself into my work, and refused to dwell upon it.  The truth of the matter was that I already knew that even if he ended his betrothal contract with Sabeen, Amir had no plans to continue any sort of relationship with me once I left Sharjah.  And while I knew he was fond of me, was fairly certain he even cared for me, Amir was not the sort of man who did long term entanglements.   I’d known this from the beginning.  He’d never once hinted that we were in a relationship, nor had he made me any promises.  So considering the predicament I now found myself in, I should have been terrified, but surprisingly, it was the exact opposite. The sadness that had been quietly creeping into my heart, growing each day my final departure date grew nearer, had vanished with the news.  In its place was the burgeoning hope for a future I’d never once considered, but welcomed with a joy I’d never thought I could ever feel.

              I must have radiated with happiness, because everyone commented on it, especially Fatimah, who I was certain had begun to suspect the reason why I glowed, given the discerning looks she now gave me any time I needed to meet with Amir at his office.  I’d managed to evade her probing questions thus far, but she was the least of my concerns at the moment. I was still trying to figure out how I was going to break the news to Amir, if at all.

              My conscience always swamped me with waves of guilt whenever I considered remaining silent.  It was cowardly, but in truth, it was probably for the best.  At least that’s what I told myself.  The scientist in me actually believed it too, but the part of me that had willfully surrendered to Amir’s passion, told me that Amir would find out, and then he would find me, and when he did there would be nothing on this earth that could ever spare me from his wrath.  Within the depths of my soul, and without a doubt, Amir would see my actions as a betrayal, and a man whose dominant nature was so palpable, that the very air around him was always charged with it, his punishment would be thorough and absolute. I would recall this moment later when I was forced to face the truth of my deception staring back at me from the cold, dark eyes of an angry and wounded man. At the time, however, I’d felt completely justified, my sense of reason clouded by my own anger and wounded heart when I discovered that from the very beginning Amir had intended to deceive me and use me as his scapegoat, without any regard for me or my feelings.  

              “If you wished to spy on me, Professor, I could suggest a number of other places to do it from where the scenery would be far more intriguing than the clutter of my office.”

              The deep timbre of that voice, so similar to Amir’s, but there were small nuances to his inflection that always revealed its owner. 
Khalil.

             
I shook my head at his blatant flirting.  Their voices weren’t the only similarities between the first cousins who were less than a year apart.  Amir and Khalil were the eldest in their families, each of them having four younger brothers.  So it wasn’t unusual that when the tabloids caught up with the handsome playboy, he was often confused with one of Amir’s siblings.  It was an error that had led to Khalil being shipped off to the military right after college, although I wasn’t certain his military training had helped with his discipline when it came to the ladies, but then I hadn’t known him
before
his military service either. 

              “You’re incorrigible, you know,” I said as I entered his office.  “I wasn’t spying, I just got wrapped up in my own thoughts.  I have so much to take care of before I leave, you know.”

              “I’ve noticed you’ve been preoccupied a lot lately.” His gaze upon me was shrewd, and it had been that way ever since the big catastrophe as I’d come to refer to the day Amir’s mother and fiancé had shown up.  Of late, I sensed that Khalil paid a lot closer attention to me than ever before, which was why I’d taken to avoiding him.  Had I not required his signature to release the artifacts now in my possession, I would have steered clear of him entirely because he was far too astute for my peace of mind.  But in order to leave the country of the archaeological site, I had to certify that I was not removing any of the antiquities that I’d found, and if I was I had to obtain his authorization, which was how I ended up the sole target of his scrutiny.  “Are you sure that’s all it is, Daniella?” he asked finally, in a hushed accusatory voice, or maybe that last observation was just my guilty conscience nagging me.

              His coal black eyes, so like the man I loved, Khalil’s usually twinkled and sparkled with tiny flecks of silver whenever he teased me.  I swallowed a hard lump because there was nothing teasing about the seriousness of his gaze, and I could see no traces of silver anywhere within those midnight depths.

              No one, not even Fatimah, had probed me as to the reason for my recent absentmindedness, although several wondered and had questioned, even Amir, but I had waved them all off with a flippant comment or two.  Not so with Khalil. The way he stared at me, as if he could easily discern my lies and uncover my secrets, put me on the defense.  My natural inclination was to shield myself from him, and some inherent instinct compelled me to protect what was most vulnerable.  I immediately realized my mistake when his gaze narrowed, so as quickly as I’d lifted my hand, I dropped it back to my side, but Khalil missed nothing.

              The sharp curse he let out pierced my ears it was so vehement.  He then swiftfully crossed the room and shut his door.  I hadn’t given any thought to anyone but Amir’s reaction to the news, so I was ill prepared for Khalil’s agitation as he paced back and forth in his office, raking his hand through his hair.

              “I can’t believe he did this to you,” he muttered angrily.  “I saw this coming, and I should have said something, but he was different with you, I thought…”

              “You thought what?” I asked, when he didn’t appear as if he would finish.

              He stopped abruptly and stared at me as if he’d just realized I was still standing there. When he still didn’t say a word, I decided to just confide in him, since it was obvious he knew the truth, and it was almost a relief to be able to share the news with someone, even though I felt a twinge of guilt that I hadn’t told Amir first.

              “Look, it’s not a big deal. I mean, it is of course,” I rushed to add, when his eyes looked ready to pop out of their sockets. “What I’m trying to say is that I understand the customs of Sharjah are more traditional than that of the United States, but where I’m from, my condition is not a problem—“

              “I’m assuming you haven’t told him yet.” There was something in Khalil’s voice that made me wary as I shook my head.  I didn’t like the subtext of his statement, as if there
would
be a problem once I told Amir.

I resented the feeling that I needed to explain myself to him, but I wanted to set the record straight.  I shouldn’t have been surprised by his assumption, after all it was a logical one, but I hadn’t
planned
any of this.

“If you think I’m some gold digger, you’re wrong. 
I
was the one who warned him we were being reckless.  I don’t blame him or anything, because it takes two, but I refuse to accept all of the blame either as if I had some ulterior motive.  I don’t expect anything from Amir.  If he wants to be involved I won’t stand in his way, but if he doesn’t then that’s his choice, and I won’t try to force him.  So at the end of the day I am the one accepting full responsibility for my actions, whereas if Amir chooses to, as he very well may, he can deny what happened between us and go on with his life as if I never existed.”

Of all the reactions I anticipated, laughter was the absolute last.  Khalil stared at me for maybe two seconds before a deep chuckle rumbled out of him.  I frowned because besides there being nothing amusing about what I’d just said, I could so easily glimpse the pity in his eyes.

He cupped my face then with the palm of his hand, the callused pads of his fingers surprisingly tender.  Despite the appearance of intimacy, it was a gesture of brotherly reassurance. With a heavy sigh, he let his hand fall back to his side, causing me to frown harder.  I wasn’t stupid, I knew people didn’t give you looks of pity and remorse if they had good news to share.

“You would be lucky if Amir actually
did
deny your existence, but that shall not happen,” he said finally.  “Are you familiar with the custom of
Misfar al-Sharaf
.”

“An honor union?” I translated the words easily, but I shook my head.  “No.”

                He grimaced at my response, making me uneasy.

“After Sabeen and his mother visited, did he ever discuss his betrothal contract with you?”

All of his questions now had me completely on edge. I wasn’t an idiot, but I now realized I had blindly trusted Amir when I probably should have probed for answers.  “He told me that it was an agreement their parents entered into when they were both children, that they weren’t in love, and that he had no intention of marrying her and planned to set things right.”

Khalil nodded.  “Did he ever tell you what that meant exactly? Setting things right?”  Before I could answer he asked, “Did Amir ever tell you
how
he planned to get out of the contract?”

              “No.”

              He sighed.  “I can see now my cousin has kept you completely ignorant.” Another long, ragged breath escaped him then.  “You are right when you say Sharjah is still a place filled with tradition.  Some of the old ways are no longer practiced or observed by the everyday citizen, but not so for the noble families.  There are only three ways out of a betrothal contract—death or
Misfar al-Sharaf
.”

              “Ok and that means what exactly?” I questioned when he paused.

              “Well let me just say this, once a contract is entered, it cannot be undone by the entering parties, meaning the parents, not unless they want a blood feud on their hands.  And Sabeen and Amir cannot simply just break it of their own will, for that very reason.”

              He must have glimpsed my horrified expression, because he quickly shook his head.  “No, we do not still engage in blood feuds, but for either Sabeen or Amir to break the contract, it would be a disgrace.  Not only would it ruin the centuries long friendship between the two families, Amir would be considered unfit to rule if he was the offending party, whereas Sabeen would never be able to marry, and her family’s name would be forever shamed, although truthfully, Sabeen is at a disadvantage because she’s really not capable of breaking the contract, that is unless she left Sharjah and never came back.”

              I let out a nervous chuckle.  “If you’re trying to scare me, you’re doing a damn good job, Khalil.” 

              “I assure you that is not my intent,” he replied, but his expression was somber.  “I do not mean to suggest that,
Misfar al-Sharaf,
is somehow undesirable, because it’s not.  The reason why Amir probably didn’t tell you is because essentially, this alternative is nothing more than a political strategy, but with any strategy there are inherent risks, and in this case, there are other concessions that must be made before it can be considered a success.”

              “You’re not making any sense, Khalil.  What does this all have to do with me exactly?”

              His eyes darkened.  “
Everything.
As soon as Amir and Sabeen were of age, they could have married, that they didn’t means that when Sabeen turns thirty-three within two months, they must honor the contract by that deadline, unless Amir enters into an honor union
,
which if you are carrying his child, then he has done so.”