Sleepless in Manhattan (26 page)

“Plumbeus.”

“So Jake is
Homo plumbeus.
”

Paige knew they were trying to make her smile. “From now on I’m making all my own decisions, and they’re going to have to get used to it.”

“Well said. You are
Homo decisivus
.” Ignoring Frankie’s wince, Eva slid off the bed. “And you can start right now. Popcorn or ice cream? Not that I’m trying to influence you, but I have double chocolate chip, which I may have doctored with a few extra sprinkles of sugary goodness.”

Paige stood up and checked her reflection in Frankie’s mirror. Her eyes were red and mascara lay in dark streaks. “Ice cream. No bowl. Just give me the tub and a spoon.”

“Are you sure?” Eva caught Frankie’s eye and cleared her throat. “Of
course
you’re sure. You know what you want. Ice cream with spoon coming right up. And if you said you wanted it delivered on a truck, that would be fine, too. I will never question a single decision you make. Frankie?”

“Same. Large tub. Large spoon.”

“You didn’t just lose the love of your life.”

“No but I’m soaking up Paige’s stress. I’m eating vicariously.”

Eva disappeared upstairs to their kitchen and reappeared a few minutes later with ice cream.

They were sitting on Frankie’s bed, spoons in tubs, when Matt walked in.

Frankie choked, slid off the bed and grabbed her glasses from the nightstand. “What are you doing here? I rent this apartment from you, but that doesn’t mean you can walk in when you like.” Her voice was colder than the ice cream. “Right now you are not welcome here. This is a man-free zone.”

Matt didn’t budge. “I need to speak to Paige. Can you give us a minute?”

“No.” Eva stood up, too. For once she wasn’t smiling. “Why do you need to speak to her? Have you made some more decisions about her life that she needs to know about?”

Matt winced. “I deserved that. I came to check my sister is all right, but given that you’re eating ice cream on the bed, I’m guessing she’s not, so I’m not going away, and you’re going to have to live with that.”

Paige felt nothing but exhaustion. “Did you deck him?”

“No. We talked.” He walked over to the chair in the corner of Frankie’s bedroom, cleared off the stack of gardening magazines and sat down. “You have every right to be mad with me, but there are a few things I need to say.”

Frankie folded her arms. “As long as you know that if you make her cry again, I’ll be the one decking you.”

“I’m not going to make her cry.” Matt leaned forward, his forearms resting on his thighs. It was a moment before he spoke. “Right from the moment you were born, Mom and Dad were always telling me ‘take care of your little sister. Watch out for Paige. Keep an eye on her, Matt’—I’m not sure at what point watching over you turned into making decisions for you. I’ve never even questioned it, until tonight.”

Emotion threatened to swamp her. “Don’t, Matt—”

Frankie stirred. “You said you wouldn’t upset her—”

Matt ignored her, his eyes on Paige. “I’m sorry I made decisions for you. I’m sorry I’m such an overprotective jerk you feel you can’t tell me things. Most of all I’m sorry you’re hurt. Will you forgive me?”

His heartfelt apology touched her more deeply than anything he’d said to her before.

She slid off the bed and felt Frankie snatch the ice cream from her a second before her brother stood up and pulled her in for a hug.

“I’m sorry, too. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“Don’t apologize.” Matt stroked her hair. “There is no obligation on you to tell me anything. It’s your life. You share the bits you want to share. Make whatever decisions you like, do whatever you like, choose whoever you like. I won’t try and make your decisions for you, but I’ll always be here for you. No matter what.”

Eva gave a quiet sob, and Matt glanced at her over the top of Paige’s head.

“Why are you crying? Did I say the wrong thing?”

“No.” Frankie fiddled with her glasses. “You said the
right
thing, you idiot. Eva cries at everything—you should know that by now. She makes a marshmallow look robust.”

Paige pulled away and Matt looked down at her. “Am I forgiven?”

“Maybe.” She gave a crooked smile. “If I told you I was about to ride naked over the Brooklyn Bridge on the back of a motorbike, what would you say?”

Matt opened his mouth and closed it again. “I’d say go for it. And then I’d get ready for a phone call from the NYPD.”

Paige took her ice cream back from Frankie. “So if you didn’t kill Jake, what did you do?”

“I told him he was an idiot.” Matt sounded tired and she felt a twinge of guilt.

“For not telling you the truth?”

“No. For not wanting what you were offering.”

She felt a rush of love for her brother, closely followed by guilt. “He wanted to tell you, right from the start. I was the one who begged him not to. I put him in an impossible position.” And that still worried her. “I don’t want to damage your friendship.”

“Friendship isn’t something you switch on and off when things get tough. Are things different? Yeah, I guess they are. But we’re figuring it out. We’re all figuring it out.”

Matt was right, this wasn’t just about her.

Paige made a decision. “I’ll talk to him. Make sure he knows he doesn’t have to avoid us. I still want to have our evenings at Romano’s and movie nights up on the roof terrace.”

“Are you sure? If seeing him is going to hurt you—” Matt eyed her and cleared his throat. “Of course. If that’s what you want.”

“It is.”

Matt glanced at his watch. “I have to go. I have an early meeting tomorrow and you should get some sleep.” He hesitated. “Movie night tomorrow? We can make it chick flick night if you like. A romance marathon. Whatever. Your choice. We can order in pizza. Eva can have a night off from cooking.”

The
last
thing she felt like doing was watching romantic movies. It was ironic that Matt, who had never suggested it before, would suggest it now.

Men.

On the other hand, was there anything that could make her feel worse than she already did? Probably not, and part of her was touched that her brother had suggested it when she suspected he’d hate every moment.

“Sure.” She pinned a smile on her face. “Why not.”

Frankie put her ice cream down. “You’re seriously offering to host a romantic movie marathon for two emotional women and one emotionally stunted woman? You really
do
have a guilty conscience.”

Eva looked interested. “Define
marathon
.”

“Three movies. You can each pick one. And I get full possession of the bottle of tequila.”

They were all working so hard to distract her and cheer her up that Paige didn’t have the heart to tell them not to bother.

“Three movies. Great.” Her voice was so cheery she wondered if she’d overdone it. “Our choice?”

“Yeah. But no animation.” Matt dug his keys out of his pocket. “And I need to know the titles up front so I can judge the quantity of alcohol necessary for my survival.”

Eva was quietly listing them on her fingers. “I’m not sure I can pick three.”

“You’re only allowed to pick one,” Paige reminded her. “One each.”

“
While You Were Sleeping
,” Eva said, and Frankie looked horrified.

“That’s a Christmas movie. This is summer.”

“It’s romantic. And optimistic. Sandra Bullock is adorable and the bit where the guy gives her the ring at the end is the Best Proposal Ever.”

“It’s the Most Unbelievable Proposal Ever.”

“Not true.”

“The guy is in a coma!”

“That’s the brother. You need to pay attention. What’s your pick?”

“The Silence of the Lambs.”

“That’s a horror movie.”

“I know, but Hannibal Lecter is really into Jodi Foster.”

“He’s a serial killer! He wants to eat her! We’re not watching that one. Paige?”

Paige realized she hadn’t even heard what they were saying. Something about the best proposal. In her book any proposal would have worked. “Er—Best Proposal Ever has to be Richard Gere climbing up the fire escape with flowers in his teeth.”

Eva sniffed. “Now
that
is unrealistic.”

“It’s all unrealistic.” Frankie put her spoon down. “Expecting happy ever after is unrealistic.”

Paige was inclined to agree. No, she wasn’t going to do that. She wasn’t going to pretend that Jake’s fear of relationships extended to all men. She knew it didn’t. “Pick a movie, Frankie. No horror.”

“
Crazy Stupid Love
,” Frankie muttered. “Because at least the title is honest. And I get to see Ryan Gosling naked from the waist up. That’s always a bonus.”

Paige rummaged in her brain for something. Anything.
“When Harry Met Sally.”

“And you’ve picked that one because Billy Crystal makes you laugh, right?” Frankie pushed her hair away from her face and gave her a fierce look. “Not because he’s a commitment phobic guy who sees the light in the end?”

“I picked it because the dialogue makes me smile.” And because she really didn’t care what the hell she watched. “Those two have chemistry.”

“Good. As long as you know real life isn’t like a movie, and Jake isn’t going to show up here on a white charger waving his sword.”

“I know that.” And she felt as if a heavy weight was crushing her chest. A few weeks ago Paige would have pinned on her Brave Face but now she didn’t bother. She missed him. She wasn’t sure how she was going to get through the next few hours, let alone the days and weeks ahead.

Matt was looking at her. “We’re going to distract you. In time, you’ll get over him.”

“Maybe you could just knock me unconscious and wake me up when that time comes. Alternatively you could knock Jake unconscious and hope when he wakes up he sees sense.”

“I thought you didn’t want me to hit him?”

“I don’t.” Paige sighed. “Ignore me. I’m a sorry mess.”

“The most comfortable place to be a sorry mess is up on the roof terrace watching movies and drinking tequila.” Matt walked to the door. “Call me if you need me. Not that I’d give you advice or anything, but I could listen.”

He closed the door and Frankie stared after him.

“Considering he’s a man, your brother isn’t awful.”

* * *

J
AKE
HAD
A
sleepless night.

He couldn’t remember a time when he’d felt this bad.

Or maybe he could.

He’d been six years old, waiting for his mother to come home. The sun had set, the sky was inky dark and still there was no sign of her, and he’d known, deep in his gut, that she’d gone for good. He’d sat there, wondering what he’d done. What he’d said, feeling a bone-deep emptiness and an aching sense of loss.

He felt the same way now.

As the first bright shards of sunlight shone through the windows of his apartment, he gave up on sleep and got up, thinking about the last thing Matt had said before he’d left the night before.

My sister offered you the best thing money can’t buy. Maybe you ought to think about that before you turn it down.

Sweat beaded on the back of his neck.

Maybe for some people love was the best thing, but he knew it could also be the worst.

Love was a lottery.

Sometimes it worked. Sometimes it didn’t.

In his experience, the odds weren’t good. And the more it mattered, the more it hurt.

And Paige mattered.

He paced, trying to work out how to get rid of the ache in his chest, and in the end he did what he always did when life got rough. He rode his bike to Brooklyn to see Maria.

She was the one person who would understand what he was feeling.

She’d give him sympathy, and right now he needed it, because Paige had made him feel like a jerk and Matt had made him feel like a jerk.

Maria definitely wouldn’t make him feel like a jerk.

And she’d make him breakfast.

* * *

D
ESPITE
THE
FACT
that it was still early, the restaurant was already busy, the morning crowd lingering over their coffee at tables dappled by warm sunlight.

Jake walked straight around the back and found his mother in the kitchen, chopping tomatoes.

It felt familiar and comforting. The smells of roasted garlic and fresh oregano took him straight back to his childhood.

Maria took one look at his face and put the knife down. Without saying a word, she made him a strong coffee and ushered him to the nearest table.

“What’s wrong?”

It was a measure of how well she knew him that she could tell instantly that something was wrong.

“Why does something have to be wrong? I’m hungry. I decided I needed to start my day with granita and brioche. And coffee, of course.”

“You travel across the Brooklyn Bridge for granita and brioche when you have more fancy restaurants where you are than stray cats, there’s something wrong. I assume it’s a woman.” Her voice was as soothing as warm honey, and he knew he’d been right to come.

He gave up the pretense. “It’s a woman.”

She nodded, waiting. “And?”

“It’s Paige. I’ve been seeing Paige.”

There was a smile, but no surprise. “I’ve hoped for that for a long time. When I saw the two of you together the other night, I wondered. I sensed things had changed. I’m happy for you. You’re perfect together.”

It wasn’t the reaction he’d expected. “We’ve been seeing each other awhile. We were having fun.”

“Of course you were. You always do. She cares about you.” She sat across from him, watching patiently as he drank the coffee and tried to decide how much to tell her.

“She said she loves me.” Remembering made his heart race. “But those words mean nothing.”

His mother looked at him steadily. “To a woman like Paige, those words mean everything. She isn’t the sort to give her love lightly. She’s a strong woman and she has the biggest heart. Whatever the problem is, you’ll sort this out.”

He noticed she said
you
, not
the two of you
, which meant she didn’t think the fault lay with Paige.