Slippage (9 page)

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Authors: Harlan Ellison

Tags: #Science Fiction, #Fantasy, #Horror, #Anthologies

BOOK: Slippage
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As Gus takes the two browsing customers by the arm, and with his simian bulk chivvies them to the door, and ejects them. He turns a card hanging on the front door to read CLOSED, and then stands with his back to the door, arms folded, as Arky and Nino proceed into the small shop.

A woman in her late 40s, chewing gum, more than passingly plump, wearing her hair in a technicolor coiffure with a thick clump pulled up at a 45 degree ponytail at the side, wearing a Garfield t-shirt (or similar "cute" item), comes toward them. This is CASSANDRA FISHBEIN, and she is clearly a refugee from the Sixties. Her tie-dyed billowy skirt says so. She isn't happy about their behavior.

 

 

20 - WITH CASSANDRA

 

As she storms toward them in a medium-high dudgeon.

 

CASSANDRA

Hey, dude, what's the damn idea?

 

NINO

(suave)

You are the impressive Cassandra Fishbein, adept trafficker in the noxious black arts?

 

CASSANDRA

T-shirts. I sell t-shirts and equipment for the exotic smoker.

 

NINO

Ms. Fishbein, my name is Nino Lancaster. I'm a business associate of Mr. Lochner here. He advises me you served as go-between, amanuensis,
amicus curiae
for him and a...er... personage named Volkerps.

 

CASSANDRA

I'm callin' a cop.

 

NINO

Probably not. Very likely in my employ, in any case.

(beat)

I ask your assistance voluntarily. Or perhaps I could ask my employee...

(nods toward the giant, Gus)

...Mr. Chaucer, to drop you into the atrium of this excellent mall.

 

CASSANDRA

Hey, who the hell
are
you? I'm just a poor woman tryin' to make a honest buck in a world of yuppies hot for Adidas and VCRs.

 

NINO

(equally distraught)

Say no more, dear lady. I, too, a humble merchant who each day takes his place in the marketplace and suffers the vicissitudes of a debased clientele. I understand your predicament.

 

CASSANDRA

Then you'll unnerstand why, for the good of business, I urge you to piss off.

 

NINO

Ah yes. Business.

(beat)

Have you ever considered the range of unexpected tragedies that could befall an unwary shopkeeper whose insurance premiums, no matter how exorbitant, would not
begin
to cover the mysterious spraying of DDT all over her goods, or the inconvenience resulting from perhaps all of a sudden the truckers who schlep said wares from the distributors decide they've lost the bills of lading and said goods wind up in Beirut, or the constituted authorities suddenly get it into their vengeful heads to toss the businesswoman's apartment for illegal and noxious substances which would, I'm sure, result in said authorities discovering nickel bags of such vegetation and powders stuck down in the pillows of a sofa?

(beat)

Pardon my complex syntax, but I imagine you get my drift.

 

CASSANDRA

(back pedals)

Okay, okay, get off my case!

(beat, scared)

Yeah, I set it up for this guy. But I'm just a sort of clearinghouse for a select few demons and soul-traders of a very high quality.

(beat)

There's this quota of souls they have to make each year, just to stay in good with the boss; and I'm just sort of a canvasser, a scout, to steer the likely prospects.

 

NINO

Excellent.

(beat, as he takes out money)

Here. This will provide the fiduciary impetus for you to set up a meeting with Mr. Volkerps. For us.

 

CASSANDRA

(horrified)

When?

 

NINO

Now.

 

CASSANDRA

(more horrified)

Where?

 

NINO

Here.

 

Cassandra is now blithering. Her eyeballs seem to want to jump out of her head.

 

CASSANDRA

You're outta your mind! I can't do that! This Volkerps has a very ugly personality. It'd think I'd turned him.

 

NINO

(over his shoulder)

Mr. Chaucer, would you like another arm for your collection?

 

Gus starts toward Cassandra. She yowls and makes a stopping motion with her hands against the air.

 

CASSANDRA

I'll lose my deal with him and the whole netherworld...you trying to get me snuffed?

 

NINO

Have you ever considered how cold and uncomfortable it is being hung upside-down on a meat hook in a freezer?

 

CASSANDRA

You sure you're not related to this demon?

 

Nino smiles and pats her cheek as we:

 

DISSOLVE TO:

 

 

21 - SAME SCENE - LATER - FULL SHOT

 

Blinds have been pulled across the front of the shop. A pentagram has been drawn on the floor in blue chalk, and candles have been lit. Cassandra stands, safely protected from demons, in the center of the design, as the other three hug the walls.

 

CASSANDRA

(chants)

By all the mages of Solomon's court, by the three-eyed moon of Ashtaroth...I call on thee, Volkerps, to come forth!

 

The cloud begins to form, the lightning and thunder begin to flash and roll, and Volkerps appears as he did in scene 2. He takes one look at Cassandra, and the others, and roars.

 

VOLKERPS

(filter FX)

I smell betrayal!

 

CASSANDRA

No, honest to—

 

VOLKERPS

(filter FX interrupts quickly)

Don't say it, don't invoke; if I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times, don't
invoke
!

 

CASSANDRA

They
made
me call you! Get'm, do it oh mighty Volkerps, waste them!

 

Volkerps muses for a devilish moment, closing two of his three blazing green eyes. He sighs, as if having come to a conclusion, and opens his eyes. There is a cunning expression on his awful face.

 

VOLKERPS

(to Cassandra)

Ah...yes...just so, my dear and loyal Cassandra. I shrive myself for even doubting your ever-loyalty an instant. Shrive, I tell you! Shrive!

(beat)

And you have deliciously surpassed your previous best efforts! These are indeed three diseased souls
ripe
with corrupt intent.

 

Cassandra preens, almost kittenish with pleasure at the compliments. She blows him kisses.

 

CASSANDRA

You are such a
mensch
to work for.

 

VOLKERPS

(jubilantly)

The threshold of Hell Itself will resonate with a fearful threnody at the arrival of these three, my dear Cassandra. But...

(beat)

Come stand close beside me, so you won't risk fractures and bodily harm from flying shards of bone or projectile heart muscle when I zap them.

 

His smile is so unctuous, and his gesture so smoothly compelling, that Cassandra steps across the blue chalk line of the protective pentacle.

 

 

21A - CLOSEUP - RAPID INTERCUT

 

On CASSANDRA'S open-toed sandaled FOOT as it steps across the runic blue chalk line.

 

CUT BACK TO:

 

 

21B - SAME AS 21 - A MOMENT LATER

 

CASSANDRA

(coming closer)

Here I am, honey. Now whack'em good!

 

VOLKERPS

First things first. The little rat-human...(points a claw at Arky)...he has a week...

(turns to her)

...but you...

(in a Cagneylike voice)

I'm gonna give it to you, the way you give it to me brudder...

 

And with one taloned hand extended, he suddenly aims a mean clawed finger at her; a sizzling bolt of bright-red power erupts from his digit and strikes her.

 

VOLKERPS

(viciously)

Fry, bitch!

 

There is a bright FLASH OF UNBEARABLE LIGHT that blots the frame for a moment and then:

 

 

22 - ANOTHER ANGLE - FAVORING PENTAGRAM & NINO

 

All that remains of Cassandra Fishbein is a neat pile of smoking pearly gray ash. And one of her sandals. A twist of smoke ascends to the ceiling as we:

 

CUT TO:

 

 

23 - SERIES OF INTERCUTS – CLOSEUPS

thru

26 - On Nino, Arky and Gus Chaucer as each bugs his eyeballs, gives a shriek of horror and we:

 

CUT TO:

 

 

27 - FROM VOLKERPS - HIGH SHOT DOWN ON THE THREE MEN

 

As he smiles a ghastly smile, and looks at them meaningfully.

 

VOLKERPS

(charming)

Next?

 

The three scream and as they take the first fast step bolting toward the door of the shoppe we:

 

SMASH-CUT TO BLACK

and

OUT.

 

END ACT ONE

 

 

 

 

ACT TWO

 

 

FADE IN:

 

 

28 - EXT. ALLEY - SAME AS SCENE 1 - NIGHT (SHOOT DAY FOR NIGHT)

 

As Arky and Gus come running down the alley toward Nino's warehouse. They are running like mad things. Literally, the demons of hell are on their heels! CAMERA HOLDS as they RUN INTO F.G. and WHIP-PANS to FOLLOW THEM as they race past. (Make sure we see that) Nino is not with them. CAMERA COMES IN CLOSER as they reach the door of the warehouse that Arky smashed in Scene 4. It has been hastily repaired with boards nailed across to prevent entrance. Gus hits it with a crackback block, shattering the boards off their nails as we:

 

CUT TO:

 

 

29 - INT. WAREHOUSE - FULL SHOT

 

On Arky and Gus as they madly pile crates against the door, or what's left of it. They are moving so fast, they're a blur. Now, running across the length of the warehouse comes Hazel, with Bork in her wake. He carries a hammer, as if he'd just gotten through repairing what they've smashed again. Gus and Arky pay no attention to the newcomers.

 

BORK

Hey you guys, I just finished repairin' that door!

 

ARKY

Help! Help us! Don't just stand there...pile...pile!

 

HAZEL

(alarmed)

What happened? Where's Nino?!

 

Gus is now performing herculean feats, lifting great boxes and stacking, stacking, stacking! He's like a dog burying a bone.

 

ARKY

(hysterical)

I dunno, he's dead, he's gotta be dead! Volkerps came, big...he was big...and right there...he came straight from hell, he still stunk'a rotten eggs...

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