Sloane: A Bad Boy Billionaire Romance Novel (10 page)

“I love you,” I finally professed only to be met with rage.

“Don’t you dare say that,” he commanded, but I saw concern on his face more than anger.  Then it hit me.

“I don’t believe you killed your wife,” I said in a soft whisper.  I wasn’t sure if I had hit the right target but it’s all I could think of. 

“I did.  I fucking did.”  His eyes burned red and his grip strengthened.

“I don’t believe you-“ I repeated, fighting back for the first time.

Ethan leapt off me and started getting dressed, tossing my clothes to me.  I expected him to run or tell me to go, but he just stood there, staring at the floor.

“If it weren’t for me, she’d still be alive,” he exhaled the words out.  “She killed herself because of me; because of what I turned into.”

I let him have silence and didn’t respond, but I watched him closely.  His gaze lingered on the floor for a few minutes before he picked his head up to face me.

“Heading this company changed our lives forever.  I was convinced it’d be a good thing but she couldn’t handle the lifestyle or what it was doing to me.  She tried to tell me-“ he choked on his words and let a tear roll down his cheek.

He told me about his young ambition.  His childhood was a struggle and he refused to be poor.  He paced the floor and described his past.  He saw an opportunity and built his company from the ground up.  He described the obstacles and the long nights, and then he mentioned his wife.

“She was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen,” he said in a way that stopped my heart.  Jealousy filled me and I found myself wishing he had said that about me.  He told me how he’d won her heart and how they shared in the excitement of his company’s success.

She had been supportive, he explained, until they had had more than enough money and he participated in some questionable practices.  They saw less of each other as the days went on and she accused him of being heartless and greedy.

The fighting worsened and they would go days at a time without talking.  She threatened to leave him but he fought back with threats of taking everything she had if they divorced.  She was miserable and trapped.

“And I trapped her there,” he confessed.  “I only gave her one way out.”

I couldn’t stand it any longer.  I jumped from the bed and ran to him, wrapping my arms around his neck, kissing his cheek.

“It wasn’t your fault,” I whispered and watched him break like glass.  I watched a flood being held back, a volcano ready to erupt.  He was crying and furious about it.  I repeated myself and felt him finally relax against me, exhaling in short bursts.

I moved him to the bed and held his head against my chest, stroking through his thick black hair.  I thought of Jared and wondered if he had even left the car.  I wanted to see his face more than ever.

Ethan lifted his head, pulled on my chin with his hand, and kissed me.  It was tender and grateful and I felt all the power of that day above the city.

He moved his hand behind my head and cradled it as we kissed.  I felt protected by Ethan for the first time.  He was no longer violent or dangerous.  He was delicate and breakable.  I placed a palm on his chest and felt his heart beat racing below it.  I was full of love for Ethan, Jared, and the strangers downstairs.  I wanted them to all be mine and I theirs.  I wanted an affair with the world that would never end.

Ethan’s heart pulsed into my hand and I felt mine sync with him.  He pulled from my lips and flashed a pair of youthful eyes.

“I love you, Vanessa,” he said in a tone I’d never heard before.  It was confident and cool but shaking with vulnerability.  “I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

Confusion swept over me. 
He didn’t want to see me get hurt?
 
Really?

“You could’ve fooled me,” I replied.  I wanted to reciprocate his love, but he had put me through so much and I couldn’t let it go.  I saw his eyes grow wide with disappointment and his face relaxed.

“I’m sorry.”  He seemed to be apologizing to himself more than to me.  I didn’t know how to respond so I let a silence grow between us.  He shifted on the bed and appeared uncomfortable.

My ears tuned into the music from the floor below.  It slid up the stairs and under our door like a fog and I imagined it would carry me away.

“I promise,” he said finally, “I will find a way to make it up to you.  I can’t lose you Vanessa.”  My husband’s voice rang in my ears,
I can’t lose you
.  Ethan placed a hand on my thigh jolting my thoughts back to him.

Suddenly there was a light in his eyes and his passion was renewed.  He held my shoulders in his hands and became wild with excitement.

“Leave your husband, Vanessa.  Run away with me,” he pleaded.  My head was spinning. 
Leave Jared?

“I can’t,” I replied.  “I love you, Ethan.  I even need you.  But I love him too.”  Before I knew it I was crying.  I wanted separate worlds, one for Ethan and one for Jared.  I needed both of them in my life.

I could see Ethan’s defeat consume him.  He looked tired and aged.  He shook his head of whatever he was thinking and held me in his arms.

“It’s ok, Vanessa.  I understand,” he assured me.  He kissed my forehead and held me in his arms.  I felt safe and started realizing how tired I was.  It had been a long week and a long night and I remembered that I hadn’t slept the night before.

The fog of sleep rolled in and slowed my breath, and I hardly remember laying on the bed in Ethan’s arms.

My dream of the bull returned, but Ethan wasn’t there to shoot an arrow through it.  I saw Jared in the stands cheering me on and I let the bull come for me.  It ran toward me in slow motion, its black fur glistening in the sun, showcasing every strand.  I didn’t bother running and I wasn’t afraid.  I remember knowing that he attacked me, but I didn’t feel any pain and I didn’t fight back.

I choked on my breath as I died in the dream and my eyes burst open to see a gold room where the red one was.  The sun poured through the windows, stripping the room of its primal color and I saw how elegant it was.

There were crystal lamps sparkling on glaze wood tables between the armchairs that sat in the corners.  The wallpaper had specks of gold that reflected the sun, nearly blinding me.  The air sneaking through the cracks in the window had lost its chill.  I was sweating and the bed dazzled beneath my skin.  I saw that I was alone in it.  I was alone in the entire room.

I got dressed and peered curiously out the window.  They faced the front of the house and I saw Jared’s car still parked outside.  I couldn’t believe I had forgotten about him and wondered if he ever came inside.

I slid the straps of my dress on my shoulder, careful not to rub the fabric against my nipples which still hurt from the night before.  I looked down and cherished the bite marks.  I looked behind me as I left the mysterious red room, now basking in rich daylight.

The dark hallway outside had brightened to a dim grey and I could at least see my own feet.  I slowly neared the stairs, part of me afraid of what I’d find and part of me afraid for what I wouldn’t.

The house was quiet enough that I could hear the floorboards shift beneath my feet.  I wondered if there was anyone else around to hear me coming.  If they were, they didn’t show themselves.

The foyer had a rosy shine when I finally reached the main floor as if it were blushing from the heat.  I put my hand to my cheeks and felt that they were warm.

I pushed open the doors to the ballroom and saw that it was dark and empty.  The only light shining through was what filtered in behind me, and I watched a long shadow stretch across the floor.

Everything was clean and in order, you could never tell what happened the night before.  Most of the furniture was removed and the bar was shut down.  I started to question whether it had all been a dream, but the pain in my jaw wouldn’t let me forget.

“Mrs. Banks?”  I turned quickly to face Ethan but it was only an usher.  “Do you need anything before heading home?  Mr. Sloane made it clear to let you stay as long as you like.”

“Where is he?” I asked him.

“I’m not sure, Mrs. Banks.  I don’t ask about his business.”  He flashed a look of pity before collecting himself.

“I’m ready to go then,” and he showed me to the door.

The sun seared my skin but the humidity rescued me.  I could hear a thousand creatures stirring and birds greeting me as I walked toward the car, desperate to finally see Jared.

I peered through the window to see an empty driver’s seat reclined with a jacket bunched into a pillow.  I whipped my head around to see where he had gone.  I don’t know why I didn’t call for him.  I guess I didn’t want to disturb the pleasant atmosphere.

I walked up the road and took in the scenery.  The trees reached out and the sun warmed me.  I thought I could stay here forever and then remembered that Ethan had asked me to run away with him.  Part of me was second guessing my decision when the other part of me heard Jared calling.

“Vanessa!” his tired voice cried out.  I turned around and saw him waving by the car with his long arms and disheveled appearance.  His shirt was tucked in part of the way and his hair scattered over his head.  I felt an overwhelming joy at his display and ran to him.

When I was finally in his arms I raised my hands to his face to keep him close and kissed him wildly.  He wrapped his long arms around me and held me tightly.  Despite not knowing Ethan’s whereabouts I felt complete. 

I apologized to Jared for leaving him in the car and falling asleep but he didn’t seem concerned.  I peered into his eyes and determined he was too good for me.  Jared opened my door and ushered me in.

He sat behind the wheel, raised his seat, and looked more rejuvenated by the second.  I could tell he was desperate and excited to return home.  I couldn’t keep myself from smiling through the pain in my jaw.

The road home was different than the road we took to the swinger’s party.  It was no longer pitch black and I could see the deer through the trees.  I rolled down my window and let the woodsy scent devour me.  I held Jared’s hand as he drove and closed my eyes to think of Ethan.  I considered the many places he could be; other cities or countries and I imagined myself beside him.

---

Jared and I spent Sunday in close contact.  We spoke less this time and embraced instead.  We shared a brunch together and never stopped smiling.  I loved him now more than I ever had.

Going to work the following Monday was less strange than I expected.  I almost forgot that Ethan Sloane was CEO and remembered my early days on the job.  I felt stable and like I could handle anything.

I didn’t hear from Ethan all morning, but my curiosity got the best of me.  During my lunch break I headed upstairs to his office to see if he was even there, but he wasn’t.

“He’s out of the country on business,” the receptionist informed me.  “He’ll be gone for a while, supposedly.”

I wasn’t surprised by the news.  I would have been more shocked to see him behind his desk.  I finished lunch in the cafeteria with Sasha who was happy to see me feeling better.  I was happy for it too.

When I checked my email for the last time that day, I saw a message from a strange recipient, but with the word
Sloane
attached.  I eagerly opened it.

Mrs. Banks,

I’m away on business, but I haven’t stopped thinking of you and the intense night we shared.  Sorry I left you so abruptly.  I’m pretending you said “yes,” and that you’re here next to me.

Yours,
Ethan

Attached with the email was a photo of the Eiffel Tower, and I knew better than to believe it was a business trip.  I responded simply with, “I am always next to you,” before grabbing my things and heading home to Jared.

BONUS NOVEL:

Stepbrother Surrender

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, and places are products of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to people or events, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

He's arrogant. He's a jerk. But he's smoking hot.
He's the prick who used to make my life a living hell and I never thought I would have to see him again. Brandon. My stepbrother. Now he's back and he's all grown up, six pack and all. He's dangerous. He's sexy. And I hate how much he turns me on. There's no way I can let this can happen...
STEPBROTHER SURRENDER is a stand-alone with a guaranteed HEA and no cheating!