So Different (17 page)

And back to Adam again. One rubdown and she was thinking what? Marriage? No, not that; friendship, maybe. She liked him, could see substance in him, skimming underneath the part that he allowed her to see. They’d been at this two months now, and for sure she needed more. She just wasn’t sure how to go about changing things between them. She emptied the groceries bags, moving to place the dry goods in his pantry.

She cleaned off the counter next, letting the sink fill up with water; she’d knock out Joshua’s left over dinner dishes. Between work, Joshua, work at Joshua’s place, derby, and now Adam, she was bone tired, but not ready to give Adam up yet.

She looked around Joshua’s apartment. Might as well pick up while she was here. She and Joshua had two different and distinct definitions of untidy. She picked up a few clothes of his that had fallen to the floor, her thoughts returning to Adam.

When would this end? Soon. She knew the answer to that. He’d just gotten free of one woman, and she didn’t imagine he was ready for another one. She’d always known she was the rebound girl.

* * *

It was Friday night, the end of the week, and the end of her shift. Mariah was sitting next to Casper at her brother’s place. For some reason Mariah felt irritable and tired. Joshua had lost Amber and he’d yet to hire another waitress to replace her. Oh, and Adam, the real reason for her lack of energy, although she seemed to perk up when she met him after practice.

Both were now like drug addicts in need of their Tuesday and Thursday night fix. She felt like a junkie showing up at the crack house with a plea in her eyes. He must be on the same drug, because he opened the door, and then it was as it always was with them.

“Hello,” Casper said, waving her hand in Mariah’s face.

“Sorry,” she said.

“Lot on your mind?”

“Tired.”

“Can’t leave that man alone.”

“Guess not,” she said.

“And?”

“And nothing,” she said.

“Not so much fun anymore?” Casper asked.

“It is. I think I want to leave the bedroom for a bit.”

“Mariah wants a relationship? Is the world still turning on its axis?” Casper said, looking around the room in wonder.

Mariah was quiet, pondering that question. “What do you think? He didn’t ask for one, seems to like my place in his bed at night,” Mariah said. And was that bitterness she heard in her voice?

“Hey, don’t get mad at him. It took two to tango. You agreed as much as he did. No playing that he-is-using-me card now. You started out using him, too.”

“Thank you for pointing that out for me,” she said.

“Sure, the truth according to Casper. So tell him you want something different.”

“What do I tell him I want exactly?”

“What do you want exactly?”

“Not marriage. I mean he hasn’t asked for it, far from it, but I do want to see him beyond Tuesday and Thursday. And not only just at night, you know?

“I know.”

“So no marriage? Just friends. Get to know each other. Good sex still—no others while we see each other. That’s what I’ll ask for.”

“Kind of like a relationship,” Casper said.

“Kind of.”

“What do you have to lose?”

“Good sex.”

“Yeah, but you guys have been at this for what, almost two months now?”

Mariah nodded.

“That should hold you until the next millennium,” she said, laughing. She laughed harder as Mariah flipped her off.

“Try talking to him. It works for me when I meet someone. I go for honest. It’s so much easier, even if the outcome is not what you want.”

“I’ll try.”

“You have to do something, right?” Casper said.

“What does Mariah have to do?” Joshua said, bumping into their table. He rarely used his cane in the restaurant. He ran his fingers over the table, feeling the booth and taking a seat at the end, sandwiching Mariah in.

“What?” he asked, at the silence.

“Mariah’s met a man—a dentist man,” Casper said.

“Shit. Really, Mariah? Let me see, I bet you’ve been seeing him every Tuesday and Thursday night,” he said, running his hand over the table. “It’s the only time I can’t get her to work. I knew something was up.”

“Nothing’s up,” she said.

“You cleaned up my place again. That’s what’s up. How many times do I have to tell you that you don’t have to do those things for me? I can clean and shop for myself,” he said, irritation in his voice, addressing another issue he always had with her. Mariah would turn into his mother if he let her.

“I was out anyway and just picked up some things I thought you might need. What’s wrong with that?” She turned to Casper. “Why can’t I help? Wouldn’t you be grateful for someone stopping by the store for you? If they cleaned up for you?”

“I don’t need your help,” Joshua said.

“Yeah, you do. Why do I work here then, training and filling in. Isn’t that help?” she said, turning back to Casper.

“I’m staying out of this argument. Been in it one too many times.”

“I’m not arguing,” Mariah said.

“You own part of the business,” Joshua said.

“Do not. The money wasn’t a loan or an investment. It was a gift. It wasn’t even that. It was your share of what was left to us.”

“Maybe the dentist will distract you. Help you to see that you need a life outside of me. Bring him by,” Joshua said, changing the subject, his way of not addressing issues when they got too close to him for comfort.

“What, you’re not my life?” she said, looking at Casper. “And don’t change the subject. This isn’t about me.”

“Bring him by,” he said again, tired of arguing with Mariah.

“I’ll bring him by when you leave my friend alone,” she added.

“What friend?”

“Reagan.”

“Oh, that friend. Stay out,” he said.

“I feel you. You stay out,” she said.

He laughed. “Reagan is a big girl. She can look after herself. Leave my house and all things in it alone, Mariah,” he said, running his hand over the table, feeling for the edge, before standing up again. Her brother was always in motion when he wasn’t chewing out the female employees.

“You’re not my daddy. I don’t have to listen to you,” she said, feeling all of three years old again. The ones you loved could really work your nerves. she thought.

She had given him money after he’d completed his restaurant training program. She saved most of her money anyway. Casper called her cheap. She preferred frugal. Her savings, coupled with some money left to them by their grandparents, allowed Joshua to purchase this place. She considered it solely his, and helped when he needed it. And with his attitude toward women, it was often.

Joshua ran the day-to-day operations, and she worked the weekends or weekdays when they were short of employees. Sometimes she’d just show up and work when she grew tired of her derby and her day job and wanted to feel less sorry for herself—the lonely woman.

Her brother gave her few opportunities for that. He was the slave driver of the group and other than one time after he’d come home from the war, he didn’t spend much time with what-ifs; just forged ahead, making his way like everyone else.

“See you two later. You working this weekend?” he asked.

“Don’t I always? Now that the new girl is gone, you need me.”

“Nope. I hired another new girl. She starts this Friday, so we’ll see how it goes, but I may call you,” he said, walking away.

“Guess that means I’ll be here.”

He walked away, bumping into one of their regular customers.

“Watch where you’re going,” Omar yelled playfully. He lived near her brother and was here every evening after work for dinner. He was single and hated to cook.

“I am watching,” Joshua said, and they laughed.

“So what are you going to do about Junior?” Casper asked.

“Talk to him,” she said.

Second week in June

Tuesday of the following week Maggie caught Adam coming out of cleaning room number one, removing his gloves from his hands.

“There’s a woman here to see you,” she said and watched his eyes grow wary. “Not your old fiancée,” she said. The staff had all been witness to her coming to the dental office that one time. Maggie remembered the scene, and it had not been a pretty sight. She was nice at first, but ended up screaming her way out of the office, accompanied by the police.

“Her name is Tiff,” she added.

“Oh. She’s here for an appointment?”

“Nope, she said she was in the neighborhood and thought she’d stop by. She and you go to roller derby, said you’d know who she was,” she said, watching irritation flicker over his face.

“Want me to get rid of her?” she asked.

“Nope. Give me a second, and I’ll go out to talk to her.”

He recalled Michael telling him about her, but he’d forgotten. He washed his hands and walked down the hall, opening the door to the waiting area. It was near noon, and Mrs. Johnson had been his last patient before lunch so the waiting area was empty.

“Hi,” he said, smiling, but not too widely. Didn’t want to give her the wrong impression. “What are you doing here?” he said, walking further into the room as she walked over to meet him. She was an attractive girl—tall, slim, dressed in a nice, soft dress with her blonde hair curly and softly falling to her shoulders.

“I work near here, thought I could stop and see if you wanted to get some lunch. We could hit that Taco Post on the corner,” she said, smiling her beautiful smile. He looked at his watch, buying some time to come up with an excuse.

Mariah’s image shuttered through his mind and he heard himself say, “Sure, give me a few minutes and I’ll be there.”

“Great,” she said.

He walked back to his office, pushed his wallet into his pocket, grabbed his keys, and walked down the hall to the small kitchen. Rachel, Maggie, and Jupiter sat around the table, eating their lunch.

“Going to lunch,” he said.

“With her?” Maggie asked.

“Not that it’s any of your business, but yes.”

“I thought you were seeing someone,” she added.

“Why would you think that?” he asked.

“No reason,” she said, and took a bite of her sandwich. Her face had the look of I-know-your-up-to-something on it.

“Okay then, if you’re done with the interrogation, I’ll be back in less than an hour.”

“You have a one-fifteen,” she said.

“Got it,” he replied and left. He walked back out into the waiting area. “Ready,” he said, walking to the door that led out into the sunshine.

“It’s a great day. Want to walk?” she asked.

“Sure.”

They set off, exchanging mostly small talk on the way. At the restaurant they placed their orders and found a table outside. Tiffany took a seat, admiring Adam up close. She was interested, but he hadn’t been the night of the derby. He seemed to have been preoccupied that night with that skater or more like entranced with her body. She’d watched his eyes as they soaked up the skater who was basically naked, half dressed on a good day. Women like her were good for some things, but not the kind that lasted.

She’d waited a while before getting in touch with Michael. She didn’t want to seem too aggressive, because sometimes you needed to play it cool. She’d read the rulebook. She knew how to run a game.

“The food here is good. Thank you,” she said to Adam, as he set her taco salad down before her. He had gotten the lunch special—enchiladas and something heavy was the only way she knew to describe it.

“So how is working at your dad’s office?” she asked, running a hand through her hair. She flipped it—a maneuver she had mastered by age ten—tilting her head to the side, giving him her best whatever-you-say-is-gold look. She added a little bit of sexiness, not a lot, just a little—just enough to entice.

“It’s good. Busy,” he said.

“Been back to the derby?” she asked.

“Yeah, I have. It’s an interesting sport.”

“It is,” she said, tilting her head again.

“Have you been anywhere else since you’ve been home?” she asked.

“Not really,” he said.

“I’ve got to get you out then,” she said and proceeded to bring him up to speed on the nightlife, sporting events, and all things entertainment in Austin. He listened as she went on and on, caught himself checking his watch twice.

What had he been thinking, going to lunch with her? Mariah had the
I-want-more
look in her eyes now. He knew it was all a matter of time before she brought up the where-are-we-going question. He’d been there before with many a woman, many times before Jamie, and he wasn’t ready to go there again. What to do with Mariah? He didn’t want to stop seeing her, but he didn’t want another relationship.

He looked up. Tiffany had gotten quiet. He hadn’t heard a word she’d said.

“Sorry,” he said and smiled. “Work,” he added, to explain his lack of attention.

“I understand. You’ve been filling in for your dad. That can be hard,” she said. They spent the last few minutes talking about his plans; he didn’t have any, but was content to play dentist here for a while. They put their trays away and walked back. At the door to his office building she gave him her card, her cell number on the back. He gave her his number, watching as she inputted it into her cell.

“Call me. Maybe we can catch a movie soon,” she said.

“Sure,” he replied, watching her walk away. Okay so he had developed a fondness for Mariah—thought she was fun and funny, but that didn’t mean he wanted her in his life more. He turned and went inside. Work beckoned.

* * *

“
ENJOYED LUNCH,
” he read in his text from Tiffany. That was quick.

“
ME 2
,” he typed.

“
CALL ME,
” she responded.

“
I WILL,”
he texted back.

He would ask her out soon, he decided while sitting in his office. He was also trying to decide if he should go to practice tonight. Mariah had fallen for him, he could tell, and it was forcing him to re-evaluate his relationship with her again. They’d moved on after her questions that night, proceeded as if nothing had been discussed between them since then, both doing their usual routines. She left for home around midnight and he let her leave.

It was so much simpler this way. No expectations other than sex, derby talk, and watching TV. Why did it have to change?

He didn’t want to let her go, which was worrisome in and of itself. Something that had started out as simple sex was coming to mean more to him. So he decided to skip practice tonight, rationalizing his guilt away. His skipping tonight would be a good thing for them both. It would show her what she would miss if she continued to push while simultaneously letting her know that he wasn’t serious about her.

He’d go by and have dinner with his parents instead. He hadn’t been over in a while. Hell, they were gone most times now, one trip after another. His dad was really taking advantage of his time off, hanging out with his other dental retiree brothers. Having settled on his evening plans, Adam called his parents.

* * *

“He’s not coming?” Lisa asked.

Mariah shrugged. “We don’t have any commitments. If he stops by and I want to go, we go,” she said, trying to make light of what his not showing up meant. She had laughed, joked, and been her normal self at practice, or at least she hoped she had. But her glances at the door, no matter how well camouflaged, hadn’t escaped her team’s notice. They offered up varying looks of pity. She hated that.

Later on after practice she made her way to her car, slowly, her delay giving him one final time to show. He hadn’t, and she wondered how to interpret his actions. This was the first time she actually wished she could call him; maybe she should stop by his house. She debated with herself for ten minutes before finally starting her car and driving home.

* * *

The following night Adam and Michael sat in a booth at one of the higher-end bars. He’d wanted a break from women, any woman, so he’d agreed to meet Michael for drinks. Jamie would have been right at home here. He used to be, too. This place wasn’t as loud as Pinky’s. It wasn’t as rough, either; it was full of wine, imported beer, cocktails, and impeccably groomed women in heels and short, expensive dresses. He knew the type, dated it often. It was so very different from Mariah.

“So have you heard from Tiff?” Michael asked.

“Yes. She came by the office Tuesday. We walked down to the taco place on the corner for lunch.”

“She must really like you. She’s not your tacos-on-the-corner type of female,” he said.

Adam didn’t reply.

“How’s our derby girl? Maybe the better question is how is her hip?” he asked, laughing. “She is something,” he added.

“Yes, she is,” he said.

“So…”

“So nothing… we’re just kicking it, hanging out, keeping it simple,” he said.

Michael nodded. “Is it going to interfere with Tiff?”

Adam shrugged. “You know I’m really not ready for more with anyone, right? Tiff, Mariah, anyone—and I think Tiff is looking for marriage,” he said.

“Maybe, maybe not.” Michael laughed at Adam’s look of skepticism. “Okay, she’s approaching the ‘marriageable’ deadline,” he said, taking a sip of his wine. “You two could hang out with us. I’m still dating her cousin.”

“Seriously?”

“Maybe. We grew up together. I could do worse,” he said.

“Take it from me, dude, worse is not what you should be considering in a wife. Trust me on that one.”

“You should call Tiff anyway. What do you have to lose? She is a nice woman, good job, good family, comes from money; all the things you used to admire. Forget Jamie—one fluke—don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater. Don’t forget you want to be with someone that has the same values as you, same likes, same dislikes, same goals,” he said.

“So how about you? How’s work? Heard you’ve opened up a new shop,” Adam said, turning the conversation to another topic besides women. Michael started in with his business and Adam sat back and listened. Michael owned a chain of cell phone repair shops; had started it in college, working out of the dorm, and it had now expanded to three, or was it four, shops in the city.

* * *

Second week in June

Adam sat alone at the corner Taco Post for lunch the following day. He looked at his cell, responding to the ding that indicated he’d received a text. He scanned the message. It was from Tiff. Not surprised. She had texted him often since their lunch date.

“
DINNER TONIGHT?
” it read.

He thought about it for a second, about today being Thursday, his normal day for Mariah, and decided to skip practice again. He typed in
YES, WHERE?
before he could change his mind.
THE ITALIAN EATERY
, she responded. He knew the place, downtown. She texted that she’d meet him there after work for dinner.

THAT WORKS,
he typed and sat back, regretting it already. Mariah still bothered him. He
should
stop seeing her, but he wasn’t ready to yet. He just needed a little space to try to see if she was something he could pass on. His alarm sounded and he headed back to the office.

* * *

He went home after work to shower and quickly changed into something more appropriate for dinner and drinks. He was out the door thirty minutes later. He entered the popular restaurant with its black and white tiled floor and lots of hip red, green, and black furnishings. What was up with women and expensive restaurants? Why did it have to be all chrome and a white tablecloth before it was considered a date; the better question was why was he bothered about it now?

He located Tiff, sitting alone at the bar, her profile nice. She was dressed simply and what he knew women considered elegantly. Plain was the way his sister viewed it, but she was into tight and bold, as she liked to describe herself.

“How many in your party?” a young woman asked. She was polished to perfection.

“Two, but I see her sitting at the bar,” he said.

“Would you like to eat there? Shorter wait time,” she said.

“Okay, sure. I may come back if we change our minds,” he said.

“Sure,” she said and gave him a smile.

He walked over to Tiff, who glanced up as he approached.

“Hey,” she said, her smile wide. She was a very pretty woman, he mused, really noticing her for the first time. “Glad you could make it,” she added.

“Do you mind if we eat at the bar? The wait here can be really tiresome,” she asked.

“No, not at all,” he said, and took the seat next to her. She moved her purse to the floor.

“What would you like to drink?” she asked.

“A glass of wine, same as you, is fine,” he said.

He watched her order another glass for him and glanced over at her, impressed. “So how was your day?” she asked.

“Fine. You?”

“Fine.”

“Tell me what it is you do again?” he asked.

“I work for the state. Accounting. I prepare the budget for the state.”

“Sounds cushy and safe,” he said. “Safe in a good way. You’ll always have a job.”

“It used to be, but nobody’s safe anymore. I’ve managed to survive. My job is demanding, particularly before a legislative session where the state’s budget has to be approved,” she said. He nodded, trying to recall his state’s civics course.

“I’ve spent many a late night preparing for a legislative session. Long hours, aren’t bad while you’re single, but not so much when you have kids,” she said. “I hope to stay home after I get married and have children.”

“That’s good,” he said. They ordered dinner and he asked her a few questions. He listened, managing to avoid answering most of her probing, personal questions. They finished their drinks and moved on to dinner. They were now sitting drinking coffee and sharing a dessert, which he mostly ate. She’d taken a couple of small bites. He’d checked his watch often; inconspicuously he hoped. It was near 10:00, and Mariah would be long gone by now. He turned his attention back in to Tiff, working to stay tuned into her.