Sometimes Brooke (The ALWAYS SOMETIMES NEVER Rock Star Romance Series Book 2) (13 page)

“Four to six weeks.” He bites back a grin. “I asked the doctor how long before we could have sex.”

I can feel my face heat and I’m sure I’m turning red with embarrassment.

“He said people ask that question all the time,” Leo adds.

“Four to six weeks is a really long time…” Implied in my question is whether he’s willing to wait that long to have sex.

He takes my hand and kisses my knuckles. “You’re worth the wait.”

“Are you sure?”

“Sex isn’t the only reason I want to be with you, Brooke. Don’t get me wrong. The sex is fantastic, but it’s not my favorite thing about you. It’s not even in my top three favorite things about you.”

“I find that hard to believe.”

“Whether you believe it or not it’s the truth.”

“So what are your favorite things about me?”

He holds up his index finger. “Number one: that we can talk. About everything and anything. You take me seriously and you really listen to what I say. You don’t just dismiss it because I’m not a genius like Rayne or Harper. Number two: we can make each other laugh. That’s important. When you get old you may not be able to have sex as much, or maybe not at all. But you can still talk and laugh. Number three: I like spending time with you. I don’t mean just in bed. I like having you on the back of my bike. I like going on dates. I’ve never done shit that like before.”

I can feel myself start to tear up, but I don’t want Leo to see me getting emotional. His confession makes me wonder if I feel the same way about him. If we could never have sex again would I still want to spend time with him? Would I still want to be with him? Leo seems to have given the notion a lot of thought, but it’s not something I’ve ever considered.

As much as I hate the idea of being so broken I can’t even have sex maybe it’s a blessing in disguise. For the first time since puberty it’s physically impossible for me to be a slut.

***

Physical therapy should just be called
torture
. It’s a much more accurate description of what is going on. My doctor told me he’d release me from the hospital when I could rise out of bed, walk to a chair, sit down in a chair, rise from the chair, walk back to the bed and get back into the bed.

After my second day of being tortured by Steven, one of the hospital’s staff physical therapists, (who I’m sure doubles as an
enhanced interrogation technician
for the CIA and water boards people in his spare time), I was finally declared ready to leave the hospital.

My first few days out of the hospital I used the walker they provided and it made me feel like a really old woman. I can’t say I’ve ever seen anyone my age use a walker. Not that many people my age break a hip. And using the walker with the cast on my wrist proved to be quite a challenge, but Leo was with me every step of the way.

Literally.

He hasn’t allowed me to take a step without being right next to me. He says he wants to make sure that I don’t fall.

Harper and Nic went all out purchasing what I imagine is every piece of equipment available for my recovery and therapy. Luckily the physical therapist they hired to assist me at home is a little less strict than Steven was. Franny seems to actually have a heart when she insists I move my body in ways it doesn’t want to move.

“That’s all for today,” Franny says after I finish using the exercise ball.

I was never in great shape to begin with. Being an addict isn’t exactly conducive to exercise. And let’s be real. I don’t actually like to exercise. But Franny insists that the only way to strengthen my bones is through working out.

This could be the first time in my life I’ve actually followed directions and done something that was good for me.

“Thanks, Franny,” I say as she packs up towels and throws them into her tote bag.

“You’re doing great, Kiddo.”

Franny is probably about my mom’s age, but sometimes it’s hard to tell. She has the type of face that probably looked forty when she was twenty and hasn’t seemed to age in twenty years.

“You should be good as new in no time.” She throws her tote over her shoulder then gives me a huge, crooked grin.

“I was never really that good,” I admit.

She frowns. “What are you talking about? You’re young and beautiful. You’ve got a great guy who obviously cares about you. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you.”

I heave a sigh. “I’m not sure I even know who I am anymore.”

She takes a seat on a stool next to me. “What do you mean?”

“My life fell apart long before the accident. That was just like the icing on the shit cake. Ever since I was a teenager I’ve been reckless. A carefree party girl. A drunk. A slut. I really don’t know who I am if I’m not any of those things anymore.”

“Who do you want to be?” When she looks into my eyes I feel like she’s looking into my soul.

“I thought you were supposed to be a physical therapist, not a mental one.”

She laughs. “I’m not a professional counselor. This is free advice, so take it for what it’s worth. Don’t let anyone else define you. You decide who you want to be. You don’t have to be defined by your past either. The here and now is all that matters. My parents wanted me to be what they considered the perfect daughter. I would go to college, but only as a vehicle to snag a husband. I was supposed to marry a doctor, have two perfect children, live in a house in the suburbs with a picket fence and a dog. You get the picture. I didn’t want any of those things. I live in a condo with my wife and our cat. Much to my parents’ disappointment. They hate cats.”

We both laugh.

Then she continues. “I tried to live the life they wanted for too many years. But it didn’t work. I’m finally happy because I’m living the life I want to live. I get to decide who I am and what makes me happy. No one else.”

“I’m not sure what makes me happy,” I admit.

She raises an eyebrow. “Are you sure you’re not sure?”

I laugh. “I’m not sure about anything. Even not being sure about not being sure. Does that even make sense?”

“All I know is that whenever that tattooed rock star walks in here your face lights up like a Christmas tree. He seems to make you extremely happy.”

“Who makes her happy?” Leo says as he struts into the room.

“Done with practice already?” I ask.

“I’m taking a break. I wanted to see how you were doing.”

“Franny says I’m doing well.”

Leo gives me a kiss on the cheek. Then he puts his arm out so I can grab it as I rise from the exercise ball.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Kiddo,” Franny says as she makes her way out of my bedroom.

“I’m making really good progress,” I tell him. “I’m sure you’ll be able to go on the road with the guys…”

Leo shakes his head before I even have a chance to finish my sentence. “You’re still in physical therapy. You’ve still got the cast on your arm. Harper’s going on the road and I’m not leaving you here alone.”

“Franny will be here every day. And it’s only for a week.”

“Franny isn’t here twenty-four seven. What if you fall? Who’s going to help you take a shower? Who’s going to cook for you?”

I roll my eyes. “I think I can manage for a week.”

“Rayne is auditioning a replacement for me tomorrow. I guess he’s some hot shot musical pudgy.”  

“Musical pudgy?” I repeat because I’m not sure I heard him correctly. “What’s that?”

“You know. Those guys like Mozart. They’re like musical geniuses when they’re kids.”

I laugh. “You mean musical
prodigy
.”

He frowns. “That’s what I said.”

“I can’t let them replace you. In your own band. It’s not fair.”

“It’s only for a week. We won’t be touring the new album until next year.”

“It’s just not right…”

“It’s already been decided.”

Even though I say, “Fine,” I don’t think it’s fine at all.

Twelve

Leo

Darrow Thompson. He’s the musical
prodigy
Rayne wants to hire as my replacement for the charity concerts. He looks like a button-down shirt wearing douche, but who am I to judge? From what I hear the guy can really play.

And he does have an awesome guitar with him. One of the best. A Custom PRS Paul Reed Smith 24 Semi-Hollow.

But there’s something about him that I just don’t like. I just can’t quite put my finger on it. I may not be the smartest guy on the planet, but I know people. There’s something not right about this guy. He’s a cocky son of a bitch, but how many guys in rock bands aren’t?

It’s strange when he takes a seat right
between
Xander and Raven, but when he looks at Raven like he owns her I know something is definitely up.

And I don’t like the way Raven reacts to him. Like she wants to get as far away from him as possible, but she can’t. That’s not like Raven at all. When she doesn’t like someone or something
everyone
knows it.

“You all know why we’re here,” Rayne says. “The first thing I want to say is that if Harper was in that car instead of Brooke I wouldn’t be going on the road either. I completely understand, Dude.”

Both Xander and Raven nod. Even if they have issues with Brooke I think they’ve figured out how much she means to me.

“I want you all to meet Darrow Thompson. He comes highly recommended. And I think he’ll be a wonderful addition to the band while Leo is home with Brooke. I’ve already heard him play, but I wanted everyone to hear him and tell me what you think. This isn’t a dictatorship. We all get a say in what happens with Always Rayne.”

I plop my ass down on the couch and Xander sits on the couch with me. Normally Raven would squeeze in between us, but she takes a chair on the other side of the room instead. Rayne prefers to stand and I’m pretty sure he’ll start pacing once Darrow starts. He can never sit still when there’s music playing.

Darrow sits on a stool in front of us with his guitar. He starts with a guitar solo from Guns N’ Roses “Sweet Child O’ Mine” which is flawless. The guy’s got chops, there’s no doubt about that. But when he moves into Pink Floyd “Comfortably Numb” I’m really blown away. The guitar sounds like it’s crying. It kills me to say it, but I’ve never heard anyone play like that in my life.

I’ve been told I wear my emotions for everyone to see. People usually say it like it’s a bad thing. Rayne, however, is the opposite. He keeps everything to himself. Unless he’s mad. Everyone knows when Rayne is mad. Or when it comes to Harper. He’s like a chick around that girl.

Right now Rayne is grinning like a kid in a store filled with candy.

He puts up a hand in an effort to get Darrow to stop playing. But the guy is so absorbed in his music he doesn’t even seem to notice. He just keeps right on playing.

Finally Rayne starts clapping. This gets Darrow’s attention. He stops mid strum.

“I’ve got a few more songs,” he says. “Do you want to hear some Rush or Led Zeppelin?”

Rayne shakes his head. “No, Dude. I think we’ve heard enough.”

Wide-eyed Darrow waits expectantly do hear the outcome of his audition.

“What do you think?” Rayne turns his attention to Xander, who for some reason looks pissed. 

Even though Xander says, “Makes no difference to me” it clearly does. I know my brother better than anyone on the planet, and it’s pretty obvious there’s something he doesn’t like about Darrow.

Rayne turns to me and asks the same question.

“He sounds good,” I admit. What I’d never tell him is that he sounds a hell of a lot better than I ever will.

When Rayne turns to Raven she’s nervously chomping on her bottom lip.

“You okay?” Rayne asks her. There’s obvious concern in his voice.

“Of course,” she bites back. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

He throws up his hands. “You look a little—I don’t know—uneasy.”

“We’ve never had to replace one of the guys,” she blurts. I swear it sounds like she’s going to burst into tears at any moment.

Frowning Rayne says, “We’re not replacing anyone. This is a temporary thing until Brooke recovers. Right, Leo?”

“Absolutely,” I state as confidently as I can. Since the Wild Child charged into my life everything is upside down. I used to think Always Rayne was the most important thing in my life. Being on the road with the guys and Raven was everything to me. I don’t know what the future holds anymore. The only thing I do know is that Brooke is now my number one priority.

  As Darrow stands he clears his throat. “I know this is a one-time opportunity. I’m not trying to replace Leo. I know he’s irreplaceable.” When he glances at Raven I swear he looks like he wants to hit her, but he quickly covers the rage inside with a huge fake smile. A chill runs up my spine in response.

There’s definitely something about the guy that rubs me the wrong way, but Rayne seems keen to hire him. Plus it’s only for a week, and the guy can play the shit out of the guitar.

“I just hope you’ll give me a chance to play with the band. I’ve always been a huge Always Rayne fan. It would be an honor to play with you, even if it is for just a week.”

Rayne looks back at Xander with his eyebrow raised.

“Sure,” Xander says. “Whatever.”

“Raven?”

“As long as the only thing he expects to play with is his guitar.” When she glares at him the sly son-of-a-bitch actually bites back a grin. It’s like he’s playing some kind of game with her.

I really hope he doesn’t think fucking Raven is part of the deal. Especially when she’s clearly not interested. I would have no problem punching the smug grin off the asshole’s face if I had to. Raven would just have to say the word and it would be done.

Of course I’d wait until they got back from charity concerts to beat the shit out of him. Let him do the gig first.

“I guess you’re in then,” Rayne tells him.

“You won’t be disappointed,” Darrow says as he extends a hand to Rayne.

After they shake Darrow goes over to Xander and extends a hand. Xander narrows his eyes and looks the guy up and down. It looks like he might say something, but thinks better of it and just shakes Darrow’s hand instead.

When Darrow approaches Raven he looks her up and down. The way he’s eyeing her it’s almost like he hasn’t gotten laid in months. Like a guy who’s been on a deserted island and just got rescued by a boat filled with sexy cheerleaders.

But I know better. Guys who look and act like Darrow don’t wait months to get laid. Guys like Darrow walk into a trendy bar and go home with any girl they want whenever they want.

No questions asked.

God only knows why he looks like he’ll starve if he doesn’t get between Raven’s legs.

“I hope your girl gets better soon,” Darrow says when he finally turns his attention to me.

I nod. For some reason I don’t want him to even talk about
my
girl. I don’t want him anywhere near Wild Child and I definitely don’t want him thinking about her.

“Best of luck in New York,” I tell him.

He laughs. “When you’ve got talent you don’t need luck.”

My first thought is, “Easy for a guy from a wealthy family to say,” but I hold my tongue.  

We both stare at each other awkwardly for a few seconds before Rayne says, “Now that we’ve got that settled I’ll have Brad bring by the paperwork and we’ll make it official. Until then do you want to practice with us? Play a few Always Rayne songs.”

“I’ve already got them all memorized,” he says.

“That’s ambitious,” I say.      

“When you want something you should act like you already have it,” he says matter-of-factly.

When I frown he says, “I follow The Law of Attraction,” as if I’m supposed to know what that bullshit means.

I want to tell him I follow the Law of Don’t Be a Dickhead, but it seems like it’s already too late for him to follow. If he didn’t have a big, fat dick on his neck he’d be headless.

“I’ll let you guys get to it,” I say loud enough for everyone to hear.

“You’re not going to practice with us?” Xander asks.

I shake my head. “I don’t want to leave Brooke alone too long.”

“I hope I get to meet her.” Darrow gives me one of his fake smiles.

When hell freezes over
, I think, but just force a smile instead.