Sometimes Never (13 page)

             
My chest is rising quickly with my breathing. I can clearly see the agony on Mason’s face as he struggles to make a decision. I’m about to implode when he finally sighs and clasps my fingers. “Show me what you named me in your phone,” he says hoarsely.

             
I swallow my disappointment, appeased only by the longing and regret evident in his demeanor. But just to verify that I’m reading him correctly, and maybe to tease him just a little, I shift slowly against him as I wiggle myself off his lap. He sucks in a breath and I try to hide my smile.

             
“Succubus,” he hisses. I laugh and hand him my phone, watching as he takes his own from his pocket. When his ringtone sounds, I scan his face intently. First he reacts to the song, his mouth opening in surprise as
Blackbird
plays, and then he laughs when he reads the screen.

             
“Skittles? You named me Skittles?”

             
“I had to. That was the moment.”

             
“The moment?” he asks. He pushes himself into a sitting position.

             
“The moment I decided I really liked you.”

             
He grins at me and shakes his head. “And
Blackbird
?”

             
“You played it on the way to the store,” I explain.

             
“I played it because of you. Because of your shirt.” He laughs again. “This is kind of frightening.”

~***~

              “What are those?” Mason asks, gesturing to my little squishies.

             
I pick one up, a pink pig, and press it between my finger and thumb. “I used to get these from the machines outside of this store my mom shopped at. We’d go there to pick up toilet paper and laundry detergent. After she paid, she’d hand me a quarter and I’d be all excited to see which one I’d get.” I poke my finger through the box. “I keep trying to recall which one I bought last, but I can’t remember.”

             
“Which one’s your favorite?” he asks softly.

             
“Penguey,” I say immediately. Damn, did he just use my trick?

             
“Penguey?” he asks amused.

             
I smile and sift through the animals until I find the tiny blue and white penguin and hold it in my palm for him to see. “He’s my favorite.”

             
Mason plucks it from my hand and examines it. “Why this one?”

             
I shrug. “I don’t know. He’s cute.”

             
“What’s your favorite animal?”

             
“I guess penguins. What’s yours?”

             
He brushes his hair off his forehead and smiles. “Elephants. Don’t ask me why. I just like them. Favorite song?”

             
“Don’t have one. I love too many. Favorite color?”

             
“Blue,” he says and I don’t miss how he stares into my eyes. Normally I would find that cheesy, but the way he nearly breathes the word, the intensity of his gaze, it has me melting right here on my bed. “And yours?”

“Purple,” I say honestly
. “Even though I’m seriously considering changing it to green.” His eyes still have a hold of me. I’m not sure who moves first, maybe we move at the same time, but suddenly I’m lying back. Mason is above me and our lips are once again fused together.

Mason

             
Hope and I are sitting in the grass, our knees pressed together as we play the hand slap game. She’s winning. I may be letting her win a little bit. I can’t help it if my hands are reluctant to leave hers, even if it ends with heated red marks across my skin.

             
“You’re really bad at this,” Guy states with a smirk in my direction. I shrug as he leans back on his palms, his head nearly touching Hope’s shoulder. “Honey, you do know he’s doing this on purpose, right?” He winks at Hope and her brow puckers. Her next slap is hard. Really, really hard. I jerk my hands back.

             
“Damn it,” I hiss.

             
She leans forward until her butt comes off the ground. Her face is so close to mine I can feel her heat. I want to close the minimal distance she’s left open. Her eyelashes drop as if in slow motion and she peers up at me. I love when she does this. “If you can’t handle pain, you may not want to play games with me,” she taunts.

             
There are multiple ways I can interpret this, but I go with the belief she’s flirting with me. I let one side of my mouth curl up in a devious grin. “I can take whatever you offer me.” I drop my eyes to her mouth, still so close, and suck in my bottom lip. My teeth drag across the soft skin as I watch her gaze focus there. She looks around us quickly and before I have a chance to register what she’s doing, her warm breath is against my ear.

             
“You have no idea how much I’m prepared to offer you.” Her tongue skims along the outside of my ear before she sucks the lobe into her mouth. With her this close, I can hear the small squeak that escapes as my hands shoot out and grip her waist.

             
I turn my face in so I can whisper into her ear. “Then give me a clue.”

             
She laughs softly, but not enough to hide the nervous tenor. “I thought I was.”

             
We pull away enough to look at each other, but the amount of space between us is minute. Intimate. I give her my best smile, and wink. “I’m a slow learner. I may need more to go on.”

             
“Oh, for the love of all that is holy,” Guy grumbles.

             
“Seriously,” Chase grunts. “Get a freaking room already.”

             
“They just came from a room,” Annie says flatly.

             
Hope drops her forehead to my chest. I laugh as I run my fingers down her bare arms. Her skin is hot and smooth. Just this simple, innocent touch has my heart thumping wildly.

             
“I would say it’s cute if it weren’t so nauseating,” Guy sighs and shakes his head. But he’s smiling, making me wonder if he actually approves. He winks at me before leaning his head back to look at the sky.

             
“Yeah, well, Park isn’t going to think it’s cute,” Chase says matter-of-factly. “He’s going to kick your ass, Mason. And I’m not saying that to be a dick.” He shrugs his shoulders slowly, a sympathetic expression on his face. “It’s just fact. He’s going to be raging. Hard core.”

             
Hope lifts her head, steadying a glare on Chase. He holds his hands up in defense. “You know I’m right, Hope. Hell, he flips out when guys look at you, let alone...” He waves his hand, gesturing at us.

             
I feel my body go rigid. I don’t know how to react to this. I figured there might be issues. But the way Chase talks, it seems like Park is going to be more of a problem than I anticipated.

             
“Park won’t flip out,” Hope says quietly.

             
Annie laughs loudly. “You are in serious denial, Hope.” She rolls her eyes at the raised brow she receives. “You know when other guys are around and Park keeps touching you, and hugging you, and kissing you? Well, he’s telling those guys that you’re with him, without actually saying it out loud. He’s going to flip. And it isn’t going to be pretty.”

             
“But I’m not with him. I’m not
with
anybody.”

             
Guy stands up, straightening his dark jeans. “I’ll take care of Park,” he says. “But I just want to know exactly what I’ll be taking care of him for.” His eyes dart from me to Hope. “I mean, what is this? Do I tell Park you’re seeing both him and Mason? Or are you just seeing Mason now?”

             
Good question. I turn my gaze on Hope. She curls her hands into fists in her lap. A muscle twitches in her throat as she stares at the ground. My stomach aches as I wait for her to respond. I want to know where I stand as well. I don’t want to share her, but I’ll do it. God this is so messed up. I cannot believe I am willing to do that. But I knew she had a fear of commitment. And I haven’t asked her for one, so it’s not like I can complain. Ugh. But the idea of his lips touching her now since mine have...it makes me sick. I want her to myself.

             
Slowly, Hope raises her eyes to meet mine. She stares at me for so long, I don’t know if I should say something or not. I suck my bottom lip into my mouth and bite it.
Choose me
. 

             
Hope lets out a breath, long and slow. She looks at Guy, her eyes settling somewhere on his chest instead of his face. “Don’t say anything to Park right now. What I do, and who I do it with, is my business.” She stands up and brushes her dress off. “I’m going to change.”

             
I watch her walk away. When my attention focuses back on our circle, everyone is looking at me.
Thanks a lot Hope
. “Can I get a ride, Guy?”

             
“Yeah. No problem,” he murmurs. “I, uh, don’t drive. But Chase can take us.”

             
I find Kellin snuggled up next to Misty on the porch swing and wave him over. “We’re leaving.”

             
His brows crinkle and he frowns at me. “I thought we were staying the night.”

             
“We’re not. Chase is taking us home, so come on,” I say. And I hate the sound of my voice. I hate that I’m pissed off. I hate that my chest burns and my throat feels clogged like I’m about to choke. None of this should bother me. None of this should matter. So, Hope wants to see both of us. So what? So, Park’s hands will touch her body. So, his mouth will be on hers. So fucking what?

             
“I don’t want to go. I want to stay,” Kellin whines.

             
“Just get in the fucking car, Kellin. DAMN IT!” I shout. He flinches away from me and I close my eyes tightly. Why am I such an asshole? This went from being one of the best nights of my life, to being...just
shit
. But it isn’t Kellin’s fault. He waves to Misty and stalks toward the driveway.

             
Guy rides along, sitting in the backseat behind me. Chase keeps the music down and I sense I’m about to get a lecture or something. Maybe they’re going to tell me to back off their friend’s girl. I’m not in the mood. I just want to go home, punch something, and go to bed.

             
Guy clears his throat and sits forward.
Great. Here we go
. “Don’t give up on her,” he says. That’s not what I was expecting. I turn around so I can see him, read his expression. His face is passive, giving nothing away.

             
“What?”

             
“She does this,” he sighs. “She will do shit to push you away. It’s just another one of her stupid tests, but I don’t think she even realizes what she’s doing. You’re good for her, Mason. She’s happy when she’s around you. She said you make her feel normal and that’s
huge
for Hope. I’m telling you not to give up on her. Don’t let her scare you off because I think you two could have something good.”

             
Um, wow. “Isn’t Park supposed to be your best friend? Why are you telling me this?”

             
Guy and Chase exchange a look in the rearview mirror. “He is my best friend, but so is Hope. She told me she likes you, but liking you is scary for her. She’s had a hard life. Things you can’t even imagine. I love the girl more than I can explain and if you’re the one that can make her feel like that shit didn’t leave a permanent mark on her, then I’m rooting for you.”

             
“What kind of shit?” I ask, my voice scratching my throat. My fingers tighten into fists.

             
Guy glances over at Kellin. “Shit I can’t talk about. Shit no one should have to talk about.”

             
I look at Chase. “Do you know?”

             
He sucks in a breath and holds it for several seconds before releasing it in a rush. “I’ve pieced some of it together, but no, she’s never told me.”

             
“And this shit, is it what caused her aversion to relationships?”

             
Guy nods slowly. “Some. Most.” He leans back and pinches his eyes shut. “Hope has an aversion to love. She says she doesn’t believe in it. That people can’t romantically love each other unconditionally.”

             
I rub my face. “So, what exactly do you suggest I do? Let her see us both?”