Star League 6 (2 page)

Suddenly Ben Beaumont's phone starts to ring.

‘It's GALACTIC,' he says, looking at the number. ‘I'd better get this.'

The others stare at me in surprise. ‘How did you know Ben's phone was about to ring?' asks Asuka.

‘My sensory system is wired to receive all incoming and outgoing frequencies.'

‘Whoa! So you're like a giant radio?' asks Roger. ‘How do we change the station on you?'

‘Negative. I am not a radio.'

‘Relax, Sam, it was a joke,' says Jay.

Ben snaps his phone shut. ‘There's a robbery in progress at the Happy Android Robotics Factory. The Star League are needed right away.'

‘We'll take one of the studio cars,' says Jay. ‘I just hope we make it in time!'

‘I detect an error in our strategy,' I say. ‘Most break-and-enter crimes take, on average, thirteen minutes and forty-eight seconds to complete. If we take a studio car it will take us fourteen minutes and twenty-two seconds to arrive.'

‘Yeah? So why are we wasting time standing around chatting?' asks Connor.

‘I thought I should inform you that I have engineered a method of transport that will get us there precisely eight minutes sooner. Follow me.'

I lead the others out into the studio lot to my workshop in an old garage. I slide open the garage door to reveal a shiny black car.

‘I have adapted this car to run on nitrogen tetroxide and hydrazine, more commonly known as rocket fuel.'

‘It's a rocketcar?' asks Jay, his eyes wide. ‘When did you get time to do all this?'

‘Because I am a robot I do not sleep. That means I have a lot of time to perfect inferior human technology.'

‘Well, if we don't hurry up and get in the car, a whole lot of that inferior human technology is going to go missing!' says Asuka. ‘Let's go!'

We all jump in and I set the coordinates for the robotics factory. The autopilot takes over and begins to drive us out of the lot.

‘Uh, I'm not sure I like being driven around by something I can't see,' says Leigh. ‘What if it crashes?'

‘The chances of crashing in this car are less than 0.01 per cent compared to a 13 per cent chance of accident with an inferior human driver,' I say, trying to put her and the others at ease.

But Connor seems annoyed. ‘Will you knock off this “inferior human” business, Sam? We may be inferior to your robot brain but it doesn't mean we're not as good.'

‘Actually, that is the definition of inferior,' I say. If I ever made a mistake I would want somebody to correct me so I could adjust my programming accordingly and not make the same mistake again. But Connor doesn't seem to see it that way. I quickly scan his vital signs and body language, and my data systems inform me that he is experiencing the emotion known as anger.

‘I did not mean to anger you, Connor. Here, perhaps some of your favourite music will make you feel better.' I switch on the car's audio system and a style of music known as heavy metal comes out of the speakers.

‘Hey, this is my favourite song,' says Connor. ‘How did you know that?'

‘By careful analysis of your personal tastes and belongings,' I say.

‘Wait a minute, does that mean you go through our stuff?' asks Roger.

‘Of course I do,' I answer. ‘Part of my
programming is to gather as much information as possible.'

The others look furious, though I don't see why they'd be angry with me.

‘Don't be mad at Sam,' says Jay, trying to calm the others down. ‘He doesn't understand. Besides,' he continues, glancing out the window, ‘we're here.'

As we jump out of the car the others glare at me. But that doesn't bother me as much as what Jay said: that I don't understand. How could I not understand? It's my job to understand things.

I store the data away in a memory file for later analysis and head into the factory with the others.

The Happy Android Robotics Factory has one of the most hi-tech security systems in the world. It might prove challenging, even for my programming. I open the control panel, ready to get to work, when I discover that it has already been disabled.

‘Oh,' I mutter. ‘The alarm is down. The intruders must still be inside.'

‘Okay, I want everyone to be careful in there,' says Jay. ‘We don't know who or what we're dealing with, so keep your wits about you.'

We sneak into the factory, keeping to the shadows. On the way we pass a motion sensor panel, which gives me an idea. I remove the tip of my left index finger to reveal a plug underneath.

I slot the plug into the wall panel and download the data stored within.

‘The intruders are on the second level,' I say, analysing the motion sensor data. ‘They're in the workshop.'

We head up towards the workshop, but as we climb the stairs I hear a voice.

Hello, Sam. It's nice to finally meet you
.

I scan the area for life forms, but there are none besides the six of us.

‘Be quiet,' I tell the rest of the Star League. ‘Our success to failure ratio goes up significantly if we can launch a surprise attack.'

The others look at me in confusion. ‘But we didn't say anything, Sam,' whispers Leigh.

‘Is your brain malfunctioning or something?' asks Asuka.

I'm hearing voices? That seems statistically impossible. There must be a logical explanation

There is a logical explanation, Sam
, says the voice.
I am wired into the factory's computer system, just like you. That's why you can hear me.

I stop where I am. The others don't notice and keep walking ahead.

‘Who are you?' I whisper.

I am iRis
, comes the answer,
and I'm a robot like you. Which is why I want to help. Stay where you are for a moment.

Normally I wouldn't trust a strange voice in my head. It seems logistically unwise. But there's something about iRis's voice that puts me at ease, almost like I'm being hypnotised.

I watch as Jay, Connor, Asuka, Roger and Leigh pass through a door, which slides shut behind them. Then I hear them cry out in shock.

Your friends have walked into a trap,
says iRis.

‘What? You tricked me?' I try to run towards the door but my feet feel frozen to the spot.

It was necessary to help them
, explains iRis.
If you had followed them into the trap you could not have saved
them. The same would have happened if I had warned you it was a trap. This way has the greatest chance for success, at 0.18 per cent.

‘Those are not very good odds,' I say.

They are better than zero
, says iRis.
Now, you must follow my instructions exactly if you want your friends to live. Climb up into the air vent above your head
.

I look up and see the vent iRis is talking about. I climb to the top of a piece of machinery and open the air vent, then pull myself inside and start inching along the crawlspace on my hands and knees.

Good, now turn left. If you look down you'll be able to see your friends.

As I peer through one of the vents I spot the Star League below me, and my systems switch to high alert mode.

They're surrounded by over fifty robots and, unlike me, I don't think these robots are the friendly type.