Stardancer (Tellaran Series) (11 page)

She frowned. He looked like he was going to pass out. “Does what displease me?”

“The scars. Tellaran . . .” His eyes closed for an instant, his breathing shallow. “Tellaran men do not have scars.”

“They don’t bother me.” She tried to be gentle as she pulled the linen away and flinched at the pained sound he made.

She eased the last of the bandage away and was fiercely glad her stomach was mostly empty and she had drunk the wine he’d forced on her. She swallowed hard anyway. It was a nasty looking gash.

“Are there any other bandages? What about a medkit?”

He nodded toward a low table and she quickly gathered what she needed. 

She came back with the medkit, bandages, and a full goblet. 

She offered the cup to him. “Here.”

He pushed it away. “I am a warrior. I do not need it.”

“Damn it, don’t try to impress me right now!” She pushed the cup into his hand. “At least one of us should be really numb for this so drink the starblasted wine!”

Either her words or the pressure of her fingers against his ribs convinced him because he downed the cup. Kinara kept up the pressure, using wet cloths to clean the blood from his chest as best she could. 

Some of the medkit’s contents were familiar, most weren’t. Under Aidar’s guidance she used the tiny dissolvable clamps to hold the wound closed. 

His eyes were shut tight, his mouth a taut line as she worked. She smeared healing ointment on the wound, tightly re-bandaged his ribs, then told him to lie down. She was afraid that any more movement on his part would reopen the wound she’d just closed at his side and with difficulty she managed to get his hide trousers off by herself.

Her cheeks flushed when she did because now he was naked before her on the couch. She tried hard not to look at the evidence of his arousal.

“You can’t be feeling too bad,” she muttered.

“Perhaps now I do not feel the pain.” He traced her arm with his fingertips.

She jerked away. “You wanted me to take care of your wounds and that’s all I’m doing.”

He let his hand drop with a sigh. “I should have asked for a joining instead.”

Hot words bubbled up but one glance at his face showed he was in no condition to do more than ask. Kinara examined his leg. This wound was actually worse than the other one. He stifled a groan as she cleaned it.

“Aidar,” she said hesitantly, “I’m going to have to use the clamps on this cut too.”

He gave a nod.  “I will bear it.”

“Should make for quite a scar,” she muttered. “Congratulations.”

“My first for you,” he said, his face taut with pain.

“Right.” Kinara’s hands shook as she worked to close the wound. “It’s a miracle he didn’t slice you to the bone.”

“Sometimes it is best to get out of the way of a
starblasted
sword,” he said through gritted teeth.

She gave a short shaky laugh at how he pronounced the Tellaran word. “At least my advice is worth something.”

“It was good advice. I could not have won without it.”

She glanced at him, frowning. “What do you mean?”

“He was the stronger warrior.” Aidar gave a muffled groan as she worked, clenching his fist. “To stand and fight would give him the advantage. Malm was ever short on stamina.”

She kept her eyes on her work. “So you let him tire himself out and then you fought back.”

“Yes.”

“It was good thinking,” she allowed.

“It was your thinking.”

She didn’t answer, applying healing ointment when she’d finished and then re-bandaging his leg. She cleaned him up and helped him to the bed. A fine line of sweat had broken out over his lip by the time she’d gotten him into it. She took care of the living area, putting away the medkit, disposing of the old bandages and washing her hands before she went back to him. 

She stood uneasily beside the bed. “Do you want anything else?  Are you hungry?”

His eyes were closed “Lay beside me.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

He opened his eyes to look at her. “Did I not make you proud today? Did I not fight well for you,
Cy’atta
?”

Tears burned her eyes. “Yes, Aidar, you fought well.”

“And you are mine. Lay beside me.”

The damned thing was, she
wanted
to, more than anything. She placed her knee on the mattress to climb on. 

He raised an eyebrow. “You come to bed clothed?”

She blinked. “Wait, you’re hurt, we can’t—”

“Let me see what I have won.”

I’m pretty sure you’ve already seen everything.
Blushing, Kinara pulled the ill-fitting dress over her head and quickly got into bed beside him.

“Hold me.” His voice was tired and pained.

She gently put her arm around his waist and gingerly, so as not to hurt him, settled closer.

“My
Cy’atta
,” he murmured.

She rested her cheek against his shoulder. “Why do you call me that, anyway?”

He touched her hair, letting the strands slide through his fingers. “Because I think you must be so. A woman with magic, one who dances among the stars.”

“I don’t have any magic,” she said, her voice thick. His eyes so warm, so soft on her had her heart hammering. “Or I’d be home now.”

“We will be home soon. You will like the Imperial World.”

“What’s it like?” she asked quietly. “Az-kye?”

“Very ancient. Very beautiful. We have a house in the oldest part of the Empress’ City.” He gave a faint smile. “There are many things I wish to show you. The falls outside the city. The Imperial palace. The opera houses. In a few months time the festival of Ren’thar will send the city into a week of celebrations.”

“I thought you didn’t believe in fun.”

“Perhaps it is time I did.” He traced her cheek. “You will be happy there,
Cy’atta
. I will have it so.”

She swallowed. “You might not want to get your hopes up.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Perhaps you are sorry that you are not Malm’s now.”

“No! Gods, do you know how I’d feel if you were . . .” Kinara scowled as the smile spread across his face. “Don’t let it go to your head! Just because I prefer you to a warrior who hadn’t seen a bath since the last rainstorm doesn’t mean—
Don’t move!
”

He ignored her, turning on his side to face her. 

She glared. “If you think I’m going to spend all night replacing your bandages, you’re wrong.”

His finger lightly traced the line of her arm and sent a jolt of warmth through her center.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“I will fight forever for you,” he said softly. 

Kinara inhaled sharply as his fingers slid over the curve of her breast. Coming right on the heels of that tingling came a tightening between her thighs.

“Stop that,” she said shakily. “You’re hurt.”

He pulled her closer until her face was a scant inch from his. The corners of his mouth lifted and she was acutely aware of his hardness against her bare hip. Sudden heat rushed through her remembering the feel of him inside her.

“I mean it. Stop that.”

“So you do not desire me as I desire you?” he asked huskily then brushed his lips against hers.

Her breath quickened as his mouth touched hers, lightly teasing. Hesitantly, she parted her lips and he deepened the kiss. Her body melted against his as his hand slid over the skin of her hip.

“Are you pleased I won?” he murmured.

Her thoughts were a jumble as his hand slid lower. She drew her breath in as his fingers found the heat between her thighs. She made a soft sound, closing her eyes as he caressed her.

His fingers moved rhythmically against her, the tightness in her center growing with every pleasurable stroke.

“Are you pleased I won you?” he asked, his breath hot against her ear.

“Yes,” she groaned. “Gods, yes, I am.”

He turned his head to reclaim her mouth. Her hand slid over the solid bulk of his back and down the planes of his chest. Her fingers brushed his hardness and he moaned. Timidly at first, then with greater confidence she touched him, letting the velvety smoothness slide through her hand. 

Groaning, he pushed his hips against her, demanding more, and he moved to lie on his back, urging her up. 

Shyly and careful of his wounds, she sat astride him. She lifted her hips, her hands on his shoulders as he guided himself against her center. She lowered her body, watching his eyes fall shut as he entered her.  He clasped her buttocks to rock her against him, reminding her of the rhythm.

Her fingers tensed on his shoulders as she reached her peak, faltering in her movements with it. His face was rapt with pleasure as he lifted his hips, cupping her buttocks to deepen the thrusts. She moved against him against him again, his eyes fell shut and she felt him shudder, hoarsely crying out at his release.

His breath was still coming hard as he pulled her down to cradle her against him. She buried her face against his neck, inhaling his clean male scent, the spicy, exotic scent that was uniquely his. She pushed away quickly, rolling to lie beside him.

“
Cy’atta
.” He reached for her, his dark eyes clouded with worry. “I have hurt you?”

Quickly she shook her head, trying to hide her tears. “Did I hurt you?”

“No.” He frowned. “Why do you weep?”

“Oh,
gods
!”

He caught her wrist when she tried to cover her face, holding her hand away to look at her.

“I should want you dead, my brother, all of them—! And I tried to . . . I tried to kill you all but—”

His brow knitted as he searched her face.

“Don’t you
understand
?” she cried. “Malm would have killed you! And I’m—I’m so glad it was him and not you!”

His expression softened. Gently he gathered her against him and she sobbed against his shoulder. He murmured to her as he stroked her hair, soothing with the soft buzz of his words.  

She sniffed, snuggling against him, the crackling of the holo-fire and their breathing the only sounds.

“Aidar?” she said softly, wiping at the tears with the back of her hand. “I’m sorry. Gods, I’m sorry for a lot of things but I’m really sorry for what happened today. I want you to understand that I was trying to help my crew. I didn’t . . .”  She rested her palm on his chest. “I didn’t mean for you to get hurt. I just . . . I’ve made so many mistakes, but I would have—” Her voice was very quiet. “I would have done anything to keep you from fighting . . . to keep you safe.”

She fell silent; listening to the sound of his strong, steady heartbeat.  She lifted her head to look at him. “Did you hear me?  I said—”

His eyes were closed, his face worn with exhaustion and pain, his breathing deep and even as he slept.

“Yeah, Aidar,” she whispered, tears blurring her vision as she smoothed his hair back. “You made me really proud today.”

Aidar had awakened first. Kinara sat up in bed wondering how he managed to get dressed without help.

“Are you all right? I mean, we didn’t re-open your wounds or anything?” she asked, blushing.

“I am well enough,” he said shortly.

She shifted awkwardly on the bed, unable to stop looking at him, too shy to meet his eyes.

Someone had left food again and when the mouthwatering smell reached her she realized she was starving. 

“Oh, hey. Breakfast.” She started to get out of bed but the dress Dael had given her was not where she’d left it. “Where’s my dress?”

“It is not for you to wear.”

She blinked, holding the bedcovers against herself. “Well, if you’ll get me some coveralls, I’ll wear that instead. I really don’t want to walk around in a bathrobe all day.” Her eyes narrowed. “Or is this going to be one of my ‘unclothed’ days?”

He gave a short nod. “I would have it so.”

She frowned but could read nothing from his expression. Was he angry with her for forcing him into that fight? Was this some kind of punishment or something? None of her studies shed light on how Az-kye mates might resolve their differences.

’Course I never heard of festering
challenges
either.

She gritted her teeth.
And I promised to obey so that leaves me no choice but to stay in bed all day and go hungry or to . . .

“Okay, fine,” she muttered under her breath. She threw back the covers, gooseflesh instantly raised across her skin in the chilly air. She determinedly held her chin high as he watched her to go the sideboard. She had a plate in hand already when she scraped up enough self-possession to meet his eye.

He lifted an eyebrow.

She stopped.
Is he really going to say—? Oh, come on, I’m hungry.

“I hope you don’t mind,” she said shortly. “Or am I going without eating as punishment for sneaking out as well?”

His face was Az-kye warrior impassive. “Think you that a fit punishment?”

She banged down the plate. “Anything else? Maybe I could scrub the halls naked while I’m at it. Or clean the scoring off the hull.” She snapped her fingers. “Oh, I forgot. You’d have to give me an environmental suit and that would violate punishment number one.”

Suddenly he burst out laughing. “Ah,
Cy’atta
, you charm me even when I am determined that you should not.”

“Oh, good.” She folded her arms. “Now I know that all it takes to get big laughs from you is parade around naked and hungry.”

“Eat.” He shook his head, grinning, and offered her a plate. “We will discuss punishment later.”

“No, thanks. I’d rather know what my punishment is and go hungry than worry with a full stomach.”

His lips twitched again and he put the plate down. “As it pleases you.”

Without any clothing at all it was really chilly. She sat on a couch, reaching her hands toward the heat of the simulated fire to warm them.

“Let me guess. I’m also not allowed out of your quarters.”

“Would you leave our quarters without any clothing, my mate?”

Well, he has me there.
“No,” she gritted out. “I wouldn’t.”

He chuckled.

“Well, aren’t we cheerful today?” she asked sourly. “No wonder you didn’t want me to escape. Who would amuse you if I did?”

His eyes shone. “No one as well as you,” he said and nodded toward the other couch.

Kinara blinked. Lying there was a pretty blue gown with tiny embroidery sewn on the skirt and sleeves. It was a beautiful dress and despite having spent most of her life in coveralls she longed to have it.

“Perhaps you’d prefer the other dress,
Cy’atta
?”

“Is it for me?”

“For who else would it be?”

She stood up and touched the skirt. Smooth and soft as silk but of a much thicker material, it looked as warm as it was beautiful. 

She drew her hand back. “Can I . . . Am I allowed to wear it?”

“Think you I bring it so you may only look?”

“Well, if I’m being punished then I can’t wear it.”

“I do not punish you so.”

She shook her head. “But you said you wanted me to go without clothing today.”

“Of course,” he said, his eyes running over her in the way that made her stomach flutter. “It does please me to see you so.”

Her cheeks went hot even as her brows rushed together. “Oh,
very
funny.”

He laughed again. “You do not take teasing well,
Cy’atta
. But wear the dress does it please you.” He patted her rump. “I think you are cold without it.”

She snatched up the gown. Her steps quickened as she heard his chuckling behind her and she hurried to the bathing chamber to dress. It took her some time to figure out how to put it on but when she looked in the mirror she smiled at what she saw.

From the look in Aidar’s eyes she knew he approved as well and she flushed, bashful under his frank admiration. Her stomach growled and she stopped next to the table.

“I guess this means I get to eat too,” she said, retrieving her plate.

“I do not like for you not to eat.” He grinned wolfishly. “But you may go without clothing as you like. “

Kinara narrowed her eyes at him as she sat down to eat. “What exactly is my punishment anyway?” she asked between bites.

His dark eyes were suddenly troubled. “I do not know how a Tellaran man might treat his woman,
Cy’atta
,” he said slowly. “No Az-kye warrior—no Az-kye
man
—would hurt his mate so, leave her hungry or shamed or strike her. As I think on it, it unsettles me greatly that you believed I could do so to you.” He shook his head. “Truly, when I order you, I do it for your own sake.”

“Uh-huh,” she said with a snort. “How many times have I heard that before?”

He raised his eyebrows. “Think you think I order without your welfare in mind?”

“Listen,” she said, gesturing with her fork, “anytime someone says, ‘It’s for your own good’ it always means, ‘It’s what I think is good for you.’  They’re hardly ever the same thing.”

“They are the same when I order you. You will obey me.”

“What would you say if I told you total obedience is probably not going to happen?”

“I would say I will fight many challenges for you.”

Her appetite vanished. 

“I’m sorry,” she said, looking at her plate. “I tried to tell you last night but you fell asleep. I guess I really messed up yesterday.”

“I ordered you stay here for your own protection. Your disobedience caused much unnecessary trouble.”

She bit her lip. “I know.”

“I have doubled the Tellarans’ guards,” he said, his voice suddenly sharp. 

“Yeah, I guess it wasn’t such a great idea after all.”

“You are fortunate you did not free them. They would have suffered greatly for it and, I fear, you with them. I will not have you endanger yourself for the sake of Tellaran slaves.” His eyes were black ice. “I would sooner kill each of them by my own sword than see you attempt such again.”

Kinara swallowed hard. “No, I won’t.  If you keep your promise.”

“I will not break my word to you and I will have you keep your own.”

She looked up startled. “I have kept my word. I’ve—I mean, we’ve . . .”

“Yes, and I am pleased with that. But I do not speak only of bedsport. You promised to be an Az-kye mate. It is that promise I mean.  I understand that you are ignorant of proper behavior but this must change. Your actions yesterday placed you in danger. You cannot behave as a Tellaran does. It is not safe and you will offend many this way.”

“Okay, I promised.” She sighed. “I’ve got a lot to learn, I guess.”

“In this you speak truly and that is another issue. Az-kye value honor above all. We do not play with the truth as Tellarans do. Do not lie to me again. On this I will have your promise.”

She nodded. “All right, you have it.”

“I have pledged the Tellarans to the Elders. We must both appear before them when we reach the Imperial world. The Council of Elders is very powerful and they will not brook any offense or ill-mannered behavior.” His gaze was measuring. “I will delay our meeting with the Elders as long as possible. You are very ignorant.”

Her jaw hardened. “Yeah, but I’m a fast learner. So why don’t you start with what happened yesterday? Why did you have to fight? Why couldn’t you just explain that I belonged to you and let him apologize?”

He blinked. “Suffer a warrior to attack my bound mate and not fight for you?” He shook his head. “The offense was such that I could not accept other than challenge in the Circle. There is no apology great enough.” He paused, considering. “Unless Malm fell on his own sword.”

Kinara threw her hands up. “It’s incredible how little your people think of life.”

He looked at her in disbelief. “You are my bound mate. How could you fight such a warrior yourself? What if you had been with child?” 

Kinara’s opened her mouth opened then shut it. 

He had a point. 

“Even if you do not carry one now, you may one day.
You
cannot fight a warrior. It is my place to fight for you.”

“Who would fight for me if I didn’t have a mate?”

He shrugged. “A warrior of your clan.”

“But what if I didn’t have a clan?”

“Why do you ask this?”

She was taken aback by the sharpness of his tone. “I’m just curious.  Does everyone have a clan? I mean, a clan is a family, right?” 

He blanched deeply and she frowned.  

“Are you feeling all right? Are your wounds hurting?”

“My wounds do hurt,” he spat and she realized he’d gone pale with anger. 

“Oh,” she said weakly.

A tiny frown touched his brow. “You mean no insult.”

Insult?
“No, of course not. I’m just trying to understand.” 

His face was guarded. “I have no family,” he said as if forcing the words out.

An Az-kye woman would understand what he meant but the significance behind his words was beyond her limited knowledge. 

“You have me,” she said.

A rush of softness filled his dark eyes and she ducked her head.

How does he do that? Send my heart racing with just a look?
 

“Well . . . well, then if Malm knew you would challenge him, why did he attack me?”

“He could not have known you were mine. Found so close to the Tellarans he thought you a slave. Dressed as your status demands, even unescorted, he most likely would not have troubled you.”

She looked up quickly. “Wait, the other women, they’re not—”

He hesitated then shook his head. “My other Tellarans will not be touched.”

Kinara let her breath out. “So I guess I looked like an Ornament in search of a night’s work.”

His brow furrowed. “Or-
nah
-ment? I do not know this word.”

“Oh, uh—” She spread her hands. “A woman—or man—who uh, offers favors in exchange for money.” He still looked at her blankly. “
Intimate
favors. Fucking.” Her face was hot. “Sex.”

He blinked and a thousand questions were in his dark eyes. “The Az-kye have such. They are called ‘companions.’”

She bit the inside of her cheek.
Festering hell, I can’t
not
ask.
“So, companions . . . I mean, did you ever—?”

He looked amused. “No. But truly, companions are much higher thought of than slaves.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Especially Tellaran ones, right?”

He touched her hair, letting his fingers slide through the strands. “Lemani stones are highly treasured in the Empire and they too come from Tellaran space. None doubt that Tellaran worlds can offer that which is beautiful and precious.”

Her cheeks went hot and she cast about to cover her sudden shyness. “So why didn’t you tell me why you wanted me to stay here?”