Starstruck - Book Two (7 page)

“Mom?” I called out.

“In here,” she replied. “Brynn!”

She climbed up off the couch and ran to me.

“Oh, my goodness!” she said as she wrapped her arms around
me. “I’ve missed you so much.”

“I’ve only been away a few weeks,” I said.

“You’ve never been away this long before,” she said. “And
look at you.”

She grabbed my bony wrist and examined it.

“You’re so skinny,” she said as she stared at me with
wrinkled, concerned eyes. For the first time in a long time, she didn’t smell
like booze.

“Look at you!” I said with a smile. “You look great. The
place is clean. What happened? What changed?”

A coy smile flashed across her mouth as she shrugged her
shoulders and turned to her left.

“Tom,” she called out. “Come out here. I want you to meet my
daughter, Brynn.”

“You met a man?” I asked. Now it was all making sense. She
would never clean up her act for me, despite my begging and pleading with her
for the past fifteen years, but now that she’d met someone, she had all the
motivation she needed.

A man came out of the back bedroom, buckling his pants, and
straightening his shirt. He was a little plump with balding grayish-blond hair,
and squinty blue eyes. He looked the way my dad probably would’ve looked had he
lived to be this old.

He walked up to me and extended his hand. “Nice to meet you,
Brynn. Your mother speaks very highly of you.”

“Thanks,” I said. I had to admit I was a little leery of
him, but then I remembered my mom had pretty much nothing to her name except
her little two bedroom house. He couldn’t have been after her for money or
anything like that. I told myself to cut him some slack. He’d made her sober up
for God’s sake. He shouldn’t been awarded a medal.

We stood awkwardly in the living room as my mom and Tom made
googly eyes at each other and held hands. She hadn’t dated anyone since right
after my dad died when she dated a string of losers upon losers before vowing
to give up men altogether and devoting herself to a life of factory work and
booze.

“Well, I just wanted to check on you, Mom,” I said. “I’m in
town until Sunday, then I go back to L.A.”

“Oh, so soon?” she said with a disappointed frown.

“Yeah,” I said. “Hudson’s pretty great to me, Mom. I hope
you can meet him someday.”

“I’d love that,” she said as she squeezed my hand.

I headed back outside and climbed into my car. Piper had
changed, Luke had changed, and now my mom had changed. It was like I came back
to a completely foreign place. It sure didn’t feel like home anymore.

The second I walked into my apartment to retire for the
evening, I took great relief in seeing that everything was exactly how I’d left
it. It was still my sanctuary. It was still my sacred space. I’d missed my bed.
My music collection. My movies. My own, private bathroom with all of my things.

I changed into some ratty, old pajamas, relieved that I
didn’t have to worry about looking sexy for bed, and pulled out my phone to
call Hudson. I missed him so much. I was craving his voice and his way with
words. I knew he’d make me feel instantly better.

I dialed his number and waited for him to answer. It was
eleven New York time, and I hoped he’d still be awake. The phone rang. And
rang. And rang some more. He wasn’t answering. Soon his voicemail picked up.

“That’s odd,” I said. I tried calling him a second time.
Same thing.

I refused to let my poor, exhausted mind wander any longer
or assume the worst. I knew he had early interviews with various media outlets
Saturday morning and a full day of shoots and press junkets. He had probably
gone to bed early.

I climbed into my cozy bed with my faded comforter and shut
my eyes. Within seconds, I was out.

I was startled awake the next morning by a Google Alerts
message on my phone. Like an idiot, I’d secretly subscribed to get alerts
anytime I was mentioned in the media. Someone had figured out my name a couple
weeks ago, so I was no longer called “Hudson Smith’s Mystery Girl”.

The first headline that popped up said “Hudson Smith Dumps
Brynn Dawson”. My heart fell to the floor. I could feel vomit rising in my
throat. The walls seemed to be closing in and closing in fast.

I clicked on the article and saw a photo of Hudson with a
tall, leggy blonde with blue eyes, but it wasn’t Ava Fox. The caption said,
“Hudson Smith Steps Out with Hadley Tennyson Parker.” According to the article,
the picture was taken Friday night and Hadley was a former beauty queen turned
newly divorced ex-wife to some music mogul. She was gorgeous to say the least.

My eyes began to well up as hot tears stained my cheeks and
fell onto my lap. I couldn’t believe it. He was away for me for one day and he
had already found someone else. My throat felt like it was going to swell up. I
couldn’t breathe. I had to talk to him. I had to get an explanation. There had
to be a perfectly logical explanation for all of this, I just knew it.

My hands trembled as I dialed his number and waited for him
to answer.

“Hey, gorgeous,” he picked up in the middle of the first
ring.

“Don’t,” I said.

“Huh?” he was confused.

“Why the fuck were you with Hadley Tennyson Parker last
night?” I asked. “There are pictures all over online of the two of you walking
the streets of Manhattan arm in arm.”

He started laughing.

“This is not a laughing matter, Hudson,” I said as my voice
shook. I didn’t want him to hear me cry, but I was on the verge of sobbing.

“Hadley is an old friend of mine,” he said. “I swear to you,
Brynn.”

“Sounds a little convenient,” I said. “Is that why you were
walking so close? Huh? Is that why you couldn’t take my call last night?”

“Some guy was hassling her,” he said. “I ran into her last
night and offered to walk her to her place.”

My stomach twisted as my mind assumed the worst. His
explanation was convenient. Almost too convenient.

“So you went to her apartment?” I asked.

“I walked her to the door, yes,” he replied. “Told her to
have a good night and then caught a cab back to my hotel.”

I wanted to believe him. I really did.

“Brynn,” he sighed. “You know better than to believe
anything you read online. Those sites just want the most sensational headlines
so they can generate the most ad revenue. You know how that works. You’ve
experienced it firsthand. You’ve read all the lies they’ve printed about you.”

He had a point.

“That sounds awfully convenient,” I said. “It’s just hard to
believe you when I am looking at the pictures right in front of me.”

“Brynn, please,” he pleaded. “I’m telling the truth.”

“Why didn’t you answer when I called you last night?” I
asked.

“I went to bed early,” he said. “My phone was shut off. I
had a six o’clock meeting this morning with a guy from G.Q. magazine. I went to
bed around nine last night.”

“Of course you did,” I said with a snide tone.

“Brynn,” he said as he objected my attitude. “Come on. Don’t
be ridiculous here.”

“I can’t believe I threw away my entire future for you,” I
said. My voice was becoming shrill and whiny, but I didn’t care. “I fell for
all of your lies.”

“Lies? Brynn? What are you talking about? Calm down. Don’t
do this,” he pleaded. “I have to jet off to another meeting. I really don’t
want to. I want to keep talking to you. I don’t like hearing you like this.”

A few sobs escaped my mouth as I had nothing more to say to
him.

“Brynn,” he said. “Please. Please calm down. I’ll call you
later okay? And I’ll see you at home tomorrow night. Everything’s going to be
fine. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow.”

He paused as he waited for me to respond, but I couldn’t find
the appropriate words to say. I was angry. I was angry at him. I was angry at
myself.

I pulled the phone from my ear and hung up.

I rolled my suitcase to my door Sunday morning and left it
standing there. The driver was going to be there any minute to pick me up and
take me to the Des Moines International Airport to fly back to L.A. My ticket
was printed and shoved in my purse, but I couldn’t bear to look at it. I wasn’t
excited to go back, but I didn’t want to stay in Rock River either.

If I went back to L.A., I knew Hudson would just tell me
what I wanted to hear. In less than a week, he was going to be on set with Ava
Fox. I didn’t know much about her, but I knew she still had an interest in him.
She would’ve have shown up at his place if she didn’t. I wasn’t sure I could
handle another round of tabloid fodder and outrageous headlines, especially not
about Hudson and Ava.

If I stayed in Rock River, I’d have to find a way to make
things up to Luke and Piper. In their eyes, I’d left them and come back a
different person. I guess I couldn’t really blame them for being so weird about
it. Maybe I was expecting too much from them.

The black Town Car pulled up outside my building and my
heart began to race. It was too late to think about any of it anymore. I had to
make a decision. I had to stay or go. It was Rock River or Hudson. It could
never be both.

Things with Hudson had moved quickly. Too quickly. We had
crashed and burned. Visions of the photos of Hadley Tennyson Parker on his arm
flashed in my mind, and I wanted to throw up.

I took a deep breath and walked outside to greet the driver.

“I’m actually going to be staying,” I told him. “I’m so sorry
I didn’t call you sooner. I just found out my flight was cancelled.”

I was a horrible liar.

“Your flight was cancelled?” he asked as he peered around at
the clear, blue sky above us.

“Yep,” I said. I didn’t care to elaborate. “I’m sorry.
You’ll still be paid.”

He tipped his hat and got back into the Town Car, driving
away. There it was. I’d made my decision. I was staying, and I wondered why it
felt so wrong all of a sudden.

I went back in my apartment and changed into something more
comfortable. Pajamas, a fuzzy robe, and slippers were like one giant hug. I
heated up a frozen dinner and settled in front of the T.V. to watch a movie.

I’d never felt so alone in my entire life, but I knew I was
the one responsible for it. I had caused it. I did the damage. I had to figure
out a way to make things right again, only I didn’t know what was right
anymore.

Piper was right. I was too different now. She barely
recognized me and truthfully I barely recognized myself anymore. I’d gotten too
wrapped up in Hudson and his lifestyle and all the newness and excitement. I’d
forgotten my roots.

My flight was supposed to land at LAX around seven that
evening. A driver was supposed to bring me to Hudson’s house. I still hadn’t
told him I wasn’t coming. It was approaching nine thirty, and I knew he’d be
calling any minute.

Just as I suspected, my phone rang at nine thirty-four. It
was Hudson.

“Brynn,” he said. “Where are you?”

I hesitated and took a deep breath.

“Rock River,” I said.

“Are you joking right now?” he replied. There was both
confusion and anger in his voice. He was about to lose his cool, which he’d
never done. “I – I don’t know what to say. I guess I’m confused?”

“We’re from two different worlds, you and me,” I said.
“After what happened Friday, regardless of what’s true and what’s false, I just
don’t know if I can handle that. I’m not used to that stuff. I don’t want
pictures of my boyfriend and random women all over the internet every time he
goes somewhere for work.”

I’d never used the boyfriend word with him before. It just
slipped out.

“You have to understand my world,” he said. “If you care
about me, you’d give us a chance. You’d at least try to understand it. You’d
try to look through all the bullshit and lies that the media spins, and you’d
see who I really am.”

“I want to, Hudson,” I said as my voice trailed. “I really
do…”

“No you don’t,” he huffed. “Either you believe me or you
don’t. And obviously you don’t. I don’t know what else I can say right now to
make you believe me when you don’t even want to.”

He was right.

“Did you bump into Luke or something? Is that what this is
all about?” he asked. He was sounding more and more like a jealous boyfriend
lately.

“I saw him, but no, that’s not what this is about,” I said.
“That has nothing to do with this.”