Status Update (#gaymers) (10 page)

I
belong here.
It was a stupid, foolish thought, but he’d never felt so much happiness. His ribs ached with the effort of holding the feelings in. It wouldn’t last, it couldn’t last, but for that moment, it was, as Adrian said,
everything
. Everything he couldn’t have, wouldn’t have,
shouldn’t
have. But for a few perfect hours, he could pretend.

Chapter Ten

After the movie, there was a sweet anticipation to getting ready for bed. Noah helped take the dogs out for their before-bed romp with the barest of patience. He brushed his teeth with purpose
.
While he stood at the sink in the hallway, Adrian came up behind him.

“So it’s freezing in the living area. Totally frigid. And your dog has stolen my bed. Again.”

“Darn.” Noah faked chagrin but couldn’t contain his smile. “I guess you’ll have to bunk with me.”

“Good.” Adrian wrapped his arms around him. “I was hoping you’d say that because I’m dying to give you your reward.”

“My reward, huh? All of a sudden I’m feeling very
thankful
.” It was the sort of corny silliness Noah never engaged in, yet Adrian kept bringing it out in him.

“Mmm. ’tis a day for gratitude, and I intend to make you very, very grateful.”

“Is that so?” Noah let Adrian tug him to the bedroom.

They undressed each other in quiet agreement. The low lights were still on in the bedroom, and Noah took a moment to marvel at Adrian’s smooth gold skin. He traced the outline of one spaceship tattoo with his finger. Adrian’s chest was almost hairless, but he had a nice trail of hair from his belly button to places south. Noah smoothed a finger across that fuzzy strip as well, each piece of Adrian a new revelation.

Adrian caught him in a long, slow kiss, hands dancing around the waist of Noah’s pants. He gave Noah plenty of time to object without actually asking the question aloud. If he was smart, Noah would have plenty of objections, but the truth was he was going to have a lifetime to regret whatever happened with Adrian—and only this one chance to create a memory worth all those recriminations.

The tiny earthquake reverberating through his life revealed itself in the tremor in his hand as he pushed down Adrian’s sweats. Adrian’s erection sprang free. Noah hadn’t gotten a very good look at it earlier, so he took a nice peek now. Adrian’s penis was a dark, dusky rose with a plum-colored head. It jutted out from a groomed nest of hair—as exuberant as the rest of Adrian.

Noah’s mouth did the most curious thing—it watered. He’d read a few fiction scenes with oral sex over the years, and the idea of using his mouth on someone never particularly turned him on, but one look at Adrian’s penis and Noah got the attraction. Saliva gathered in his mouth and his nose practically itched yearning to know what Adrian smelled like there.

His strange new desires were pushed from his head as Adrian stripped him of his pants and tumbled him backward on the bed.

“I could kiss you all night.” Adrian peered down at him, a tender expression on his face. He’d lost his glasses at some point in the undressing, and he looked softer, more vulnerable without them.

The blend of approachability and total control made Noah’s erection throb. He could trust Adrian. He
did
trust Adrian. It was safe and okay to let go with him. He had been trapped in a stiff, three-piece-suit of a life, and Adrian was gradually freeing him, one button, one kiss at a time.

They traded kisses like bites of food—sharing nourishment, a deeper communion than simply lips meeting. Noah’s limbs were heavy, and his brain slowed so much, he wondered if he could actually fall asleep like this, being kissed into a coma.

He laughed at the thought, which made Adrian laugh too. And then Adrian was on top of him and sleep didn’t seem like such a near possibility.

“Can I show you something? I think you’ll like it.”

“Anything
.
” Noah exhaled around the word.

“Good answer.” Adrian moved so that they were still kissing, but he had a hand between them—

On Noah. He had a hand on Noah’s erection. A firm, faintly callused grip that was nothing like his own perfunctory grasp.

Noah moaned, back arching without his permission, hips seeking.

“You are so hot and sweet,” Adrian whispered against his lips. “Like that, do you? How about this?”

His hold retreated, and his erection slapped damply against Noah’s, but then Adrian’s hand was back, holding both of them and...

“Oh God
.
”

“Nice, huh?” Adrian kissed his neck. “Or as you would say, satisfactory?”

“Very.”

“I want to come when you do.” Adrian’s words were a wicked command that went right to Noah’s soul. “I want to kiss you until neither of us can wait a second longer, and then I want you to come all over my cock.”

“
Uh.
” Noah grunted his agreement with the plan.

Adrian spit on his palm, which should have been crude but only served to ratchet Noah’s desire even higher. He wanted every rude, crude thing Adrian could dream up. He snaked his arms around Adrian’s shoulders, holding on as everything threatened to shatter apart.

“
Shh.
Not yet,” Adrian commanded, strokes slowing. “Have you ever done this before? Edge close and then back off?”

Noah shook his head. What was the point in drawing out his self-indulgence? But this...He was in favor of anything that made this time with Adrian last.

“Just wait. The longer we can last, the more you’ll see stars when you come.”

“I already see stars,” Noah said shakily.

“Good.” Adrian kissed him again, and the world shrank to the sliver of space between their bodies, and his sole purpose in life became eradicating that space. He pushed up into Adrian’s kiss, chased the thrust of his hips and pulled at his shoulders.

“Can’t breathe.” Adrian coughed, then grabbed Noah’s hand with his free hand, put it on his chest. “Here. Touch me.”

Noah started by tracing the colorful tats again, following the swoop and fall of the clouds and planets at the same time his body followed Adrian’s rhythm, speeding up and slowing down. Noah dipped lower, stroking Adrian’s nipples, being especially cautious with the one with the nipple ring.

“Yeah. That.” Adrian’s head fell back, tendons of his neck straining. “More. You won’t hurt me.”

Emboldened, Noah rolled the nubs between his fingers.

Air hissed out from between Adrian’s teeth. “Oh yeah. You’re getting me there. Damn.”

Noah experimented, discovering that tugs made Adrian groan, flicks made him pant, but rubbing made Adrian chase a firmer touch by arching his chest. He gave a gentle twist to the piercing—

“
Oh holy fuck.
” Adrian rutted against Noah, sliding faster into his fist.

Noah had done that. He’d made Adrian flush with passion, made him shout, made him...
use
Noah. God.

“More.” This time the cry was his own. He wanted this. Wanted Adrian to take everything he wanted from him. Everything he needed. Noah wanted to give it all.

“Getting close.” Adrian’s mouth slammed over his own.

“Now?” He strained, every cell aching with the need to release.

“Hold on...” Adrian’s eyes were closed, his face a contorted mask of agony. Noah could watch him for hours. He had never had much use for porn, but this? He’d hand over his savings account to watch Adrian’s face when he stopped holding back, his face when the passion finally broke.

“Now.” They both gasped at the same moment, orgasms finally winning. Wave after wave of sensation swamped him until Adrian’s beautiful face became a blur. It took Noah several minutes to realize that his vision was cloudy because of tears.

No. Not tears. Some other sort of moisture. It had been a singular orgasm, but he wasn’t someone moved to tears by biology.

Except maybe he was. Adrian was kissing his cheeks, murmuring nonsense words in his ears. “I know, sweetheart. Me too. Me too.”

Adrian rolled away and Noah knew a moment of panic. “Don’t go.”

“Just grabbing a towel. I’m not going anywhere.”

In that moment, Noah wished with all his heart that was true.

* * *

Adrian awoke to a loud, rumbling sound that shook the RV and made the dogs whine.

“What? Dre?” Noah stretched and rubbed his eyes. Adrian loved how Noah woke up slow from sleep, staying cuddly for long moments before the all-business Noah reappeared. Adrian was only “Dre” in the heights of passion or the depths of sleep, and he kind of liked Noah having a private name for him.

Don’t get used to it.

The rumbling sound got louder, and Adrian stumbled out of bed to go investigate. He looked out the window of the living area.

“Hey, come see! It’s a snowplow!” he called excitedly before it hit him what this meant—this was likely his last day with Noah, his last few hours even.

Go away.
Go away and come back another day.
His childish self wanted to go burrow under the covers, drag Noah with him. But Noah already had his phone out and was clicking around.

“Looks like more snow is coming later tonight, but if we go soon, we should make Denver before the worst of it hits. Roads still aren’t great, but we should manage.”

“More snow tonight? You should overnight in Denver so you don’t get stuck in a major storm on your way back.”
Yes.
Please.
And ask me to stay with you.
“I can give you the name of the RV park where Trent and I were going to stay.”

“Maybe.” Noah tapped his fingers against his mouth. “We should probably pack up, take advantage of this window.”

“Okay.” Adrian’s back tightened up as if he hadn’t slept a wink.
Maybe
was his least favorite word in the universe. Why couldn’t Noah agree to stay an extra night in Denver? He didn’t seem necessarily eager but he also wasn’t dragging his feet. Already he had water for tea on and was tidying up the living area.

“I’ll take care of the dogs,” Adrian said and reached for his borrowed boots, because really what choice did he have? His family was counting on him, Noah didn’t seem inclined to keep him, and the weather was pushing things to their natural conclusion.

* * *

A few hours later, Adrian’s mood had yet to improve. Each mile they traveled seemed to push them further apart, removing the easy camaraderie they had shared until they were reduced to listening to Noah’s playlist and talking about benign things like the dogs.

“Speaking of, we should probably stop at the next rest stop, let the dogs take a quick break,” Adrian said.

“Okay.” Noah sounded nervous.

“What’s wrong?” Traffic was slow but moving, and Adrian couldn’t see any immediate danger other than an ominously gray sky.

“I saw a few flurries, but...” Noah took some deep breaths, and Adrian tried to give him the space he seemed to need to get big ideas out. “Would you like to drive after our break? You most likely know the roads around Denver better than me.”

“Yeah.” Adrian smiled slowly. Noah letting him drive was a huge thing. Made him think about what else Noah might let him drive if Adrian only had the patience—and the time. “We’re still about two hours out from my mom’s place, but I’d be happy to drive.”

As they pulled into the rest area, Adrian noticed the lines around Noah’s mouth and eyes. “Tell you what. I’ll take the dogs. You can work on your research or maybe just lie down a bit.”

“You saying I need a nap?” Noah parked the RV in one of the extra-long truck spaces at the rest stop. The place was hopping, full of holiday traffic and truckers trying to push through the break in the bad weather.

“I’m saying you
deserve
a nap.” Adrian brushed a quick kiss over Noah’s cheek.

“You...you deserve a lot too,” Noah said softly. He had a way of saying volumes in only a few words. Something tugged hard inside Adrian’s chest, a deep pull he felt all the way to his toes.
Stay.
Stay here with this man.

Of course, he couldn’t—dogs were waiting and the weather wouldn’t hold up much longer.

As he walked the dogs over to the pet area, he noticed another RV—one of the RV America rentals like he and Trent had driven. Then he noticed a familiar man dozing in the driver’s seat, bald head lolling forward.

“Hey!” Adrian strode right over, knocked on the driver’s side glass. “What are you doing?”

The look on Trent’s face was straight out of a horror movie, complete with high-pitched scream.

“You better not be thinking about leaving, you prick.” Adrian pounded harder, and the dogs got in on the act, barking loudly.

Trent lowered the window—but only partway. “
Adddreeee-an!
Baby! I’ve found you!” The booming greeting was at odds with the tightness around Trent’s mouth.

“You’ve found me
?
” Adrian dug out his phone, held it up. “You consider trying to call me? Text? Make sure I wasn’t fucking frozen in Utah? You abandoned me. And now you can’t even get out of the car to talk to me like a man?”

“You’ve got that thing with you. Where’d you even find such an ugly stray?” Trent made a vague gesture in the direction of Ulysses, who was eyeing Trent with definite doggie derision. “Can’t you lose it somewhere? Come on, baby, you know you can’t keep it.”

“I’m not the one who leaves things in strange places in the middle of winter. Don’t you have any fucking soul?”

“Baby
.
Of course I do. I went back to the campground.” His eyes slid to the side. “But you were already gone...I figured I’d continue on to your parents’. Apologize in person.” Another eye slide. His voice was extra nasal today, a defensiveness to his tone that made Adrian’s ears wince with each syllable.

“Yeah? And how was I supposed to get there? Flap my arms and fly? You have all my shit. You have my fucking wallet. I’m lucky I got a ride and I’m not a Popsicle right now.”

Trent blanched at this. “I...uh...I do?” He opened the door, got out, giving a wide berth to Adrian and the dogs. “Baby. Believe me. I never meant to leave you in such a predicament. Why don’t you get in the RV? Let me apologize...properly.” Trent’s voice dropped, a low tone Adrian had found hella sexy in chat once upon a time.

“And the dogs?” Adrian couldn’t believe Trent’s audacity. Not only was he a terrible liar, but he didn’t have the first clue about what sort of apology would actually work with him.

“You are going to take care of them, right?” Trent shrugged. “Just keep them away from me. What do I care? Let me make this up to you.”