Stripping Asjiah II

Everything I do, everything that I am and everything that I‟ll ever be, I owe it all to you. Sometimes I look in the mirror and see your reflection, or I hear your voice when I speak, sometimes it‟s something as small as my mannerisms that remind me of you. I don‟t know if I will ever be able to accept your absence, because to me; to us, you are still here. You are the air that I breathe, the smile on my face, and the light in my eyes. You are my hope for tomorrow and my reason for living. If I accomplish nothing else in life, my dream is to be half of the woman you were and still are to me. I love you.

Sometimes I feel like I‟m seeing the world through your eyes. Like my heart isn‟t my own but yours as well. You have taught me not to run from fear, but to embrace it. To love those who hate me and to learn to forgive those who have caused me pain. Unconsciously it seems that my love for you has allowed you to heal although at times I feel like it‟s killing me, but if I can bring you joy, that‟s all that matters to me. There‟s so much more I can say, just know that if I had it to do all over again, I would still choose you. You‟re my dad, my father, my friend, and I love you.

Leave it to me to make writing my acknowledgements difficult. I’ve rewrote this a million times and the more I thought about it, the shorter my list became. There were some people who I acknowledged and thanked inStripping Asjiah that didn’t deserve it. I found myself being grateful to people who I was
“acquainted” withbut had never read one line, came out to an open mic, or even purchased the book, people I had known for years but didn’t “know” shit about me, those who were only around for good times but never there to grind it out and hold me down during the bad. I’m not going to do that with this one. I’ve never been one to run witha lot of people so those I kept close to me, I felt like they deserved to be there, like they understood me, those were the ones I confided in, that I shared my story with, but I’ve come to realize that no matter how much I told them, no matter how good of a friend I was or tried to be, they still didn’t get me.

You can paint a picture for millions of people hoping that they will all see the same thing you do but everyone is going to formulate their own opinion, everyone’s depictionof the portrait is going to be different and if I spent my days worrying about what people had to say, about what they thought, constantly livingfor the validationof others, I wouldn’t get too far. So no matter how small mycircle gets, I’d rather be at the top with those who I know are “true friends” versus those who only endured the climb just to push me off.
Now that I got that out of the way, first and foremost I need to give all thanks to God who is the head of my life. In times when I curse you, question you, or feel as if you have abandoned me, I know those are the times when you are with me the most. I would not be where I am today if it weren’t for you holding my hand and walking with me continuously throughout this journey I call life. I am forever thankful for everything you’ve done and continue to do for me. This past year has been a test for me on various levels and if it weren’t for your grace and mercy, I

wouldn’t have made it. I onlyask that you will continue to hold my hand and allow me to be a better woman than I am right now, than I was yesterday, or that I will be tomorrow.

To my extended family at Cover Me Presents, Black Tuesday, Art of Storytelling and Laughing and Lounging…thank you for allowing me to touch the mic.

To Lauren Manney…words can’t express how much you mean to me. You accepted me into your heart and have loved me unconditionally for the past nine years. When I need someone to talk to, no matter the time or the day, I know I can call on you. I will always love you no matter what. You will always be like a mother to me.

MommySharon you are an amazing woman and I’ve never had someone care so much about me to not havemet me in person. You believe that I’m a phenomenon, a brilliant force to reckon with; at times I’ve found myself staring at my reflectiontrying to make sure it’s me that you’re referring to. I love you and for seeing a part of me that is often shaded by the darkness in the world. My heart will always be in California.

My heart and soul; Peanut, you’ve had my heart since the day you were born and although I can’t be with youeveryday like I want to, know that your “Tee-tee” is always thinking of you. If I could give you the world, I would. You are the reason I live. If you know nothing else in life, know that I would do ANYTHING for you and it was never my intentions to be absent from your life. A lot of times people do things out of spite and innocent people become casualties of their malice, I don’t expect youto understand but hopefully one day soon things will get

better. I love you immensely. To my brother; I feel like the world has pushed and pulled us in so many directions, torn us into so many pieces that at times we forget how to put ourselves back together. It hurts that we aren’t the way we once were but I’ve learned to remove myself from situations that aren’t healthy for me, no matter the person or the circumstance. We share a bond that no one else in this world can break, at the end of it all; you will always be my big brother, my Angel, my dark knight. I love you madly.

To Jay, where do I start? Crazy how things have played out for us thus far, looking back on it all, I wouldn’t change a thing. There are so many things I want to say to youbut I feel like I’m going to have a lifetime to do it. Thank you for being my better half. Thank you for talking me through things when I don’t always see both sides of a situation, for entertaining and listening to all my crazy ideas and thoughts, for understanding my vision and letting me be who I am. You are so many things that I’m not and I love you for that. At times your intellect frightens me, in a good way being that you view the world so differently than I do so that grants you the ability to open my eyes to things they would’ve remained closed to. Thank you for making me smile in times that I want to cry, thank you for pushing me to get out of my comfort zone and daring me to be great, for allowing me to stand on my own and believing that I can do it. Thank you for “time out” although I don’t like it, I understand why you do it. Thank you for being patient (I know I can be a lot to deal with sometimes), for being understanding and for loving me unconditionally. If you could pull the stars out of the sky, I know you would, in the meantime I’ll take one of those cards. (Ah! It’s fairy tale love)

Most importantly, thank you to the fan base that has grown due to the success of Stripping Asjiah. This book has takenona life of it’s own that I wasn’t expecting. To everyone out in Vacaville, Ca; thank you for all your support. Rootz, Benny, Mike, my body guard Raheim, Dr. Omara, and to everyone in Talladega Al; T-Mo, Infamous, Papa, Eric, Plat. If there is anyone I didn’t name, blame my mind and not my heart. All of you have read between the lines and fell in love with the person behind the words, not just the words themselves. Urban literature is a tough genre to compete in especially when you are a first time author, so I would like to personally thank all of those who purchased my book and wrote reviews for it, blogged about it or came out to a signing. Your support is greatly appreciated. I promised to deliver a sequel that would top my first one and I hope you enjoy it. I’m sorryit took so long. Stay tuned because there is so much more to come.

Sa‟Rese From the beginning we were set up to fail The odds stacked against us
Fast cash, drugs, and sex the perfect recipe to tempt us. God had abandoned us
Stranded us in this hell we called lifeHe showed us first hand marriage wasn’t shit when he allowed our father to kill his wife.
But the devil said he’d save us
So to him we pledged our allegianceNot knowing it would cost me my son and my brother his freedom.

Family ; we don’t need’em
Like vultures they just wanted to pick our bones
Kick us when we’re down
Point fingers
And throw stones
Out the windows of their glass houses built with betrayal and lies
Threatening to shatter around them; exposing years of scandal and incestuous ties.
Friends had turned to enemies leaving us with no one to trust
Back to back we stood together as demons surrounded us. Our eyes are dark
Hearts cold from the things that have happened There’s no room for fear inside us
All emotions are absent.

We’ve been stripped of everything; what more could you take from me?
Fuck it, you can have it all
To us
It’s just
Blood Money.

“Don‟t forget to remind your parents about the Science Fair tomorrow!”
The anxious second graders gathered their book bags and homework assignments as they lined up by the door and waited for the bell.
“Mr. Donnelly, can I help you feed Strawberry?”
“Of course you can.” Mr. Donnelly clapped the erasers together sending dust flying all over his glasses.
Asjiah laughed as chalk covered her teacher‟s face.
“Seems like I‟m making quite the mess doesn‟t it?” Retrieving a Kleenex from the box on his desk; he wiped off his lenses and said goodbye to the students just as the bell was ringing.
“Okay, now let us visit our friend shall we?” Mr. Donnelly gently grabbed Asjiah by the hand and led her over to the tank that held the massive boa constrictor they affectionately called Strawberry. Bright red splotches decorated the serpents cream colored body which coiled intricately around the glass case.
“Remember, drop the mouse on the opposite end and not directly in front of Strawberry okay Asjiah?”
“Okay.” Asjiah took the cover off the small box which contained a tiny, albino mouse.
“Ooh can I watch?” Angel appeared outside of the door just as his sister was getting ready to feed the snake.
“Wellhello there Angel, come right in.”
Angel was in Mr. Donnelly‟s class during his second grade year and often came to pay his favorite Science teacher visits during the day.
Angel dropped his backpack next to the door and joined his sister. They both watched in silence as she placed the unexpecting mouse next to the predator.
At first Strawberry seemed unaware of the rodent but it didn‟t take long before it began to flicker its tongue and sense out its prey.
“Do you remember why Strawberry uses her tongue to detect the mouse?”
“Because…”
“Shhh! Not you Angel, he asked me!” Asjiah placed her hand over her brother‟s mouth to silence his outburst.
“Because that‟s how they smell.”
“Good job Asjiah.”
Delighted by her answer, she turned to her brother and grinned exposing small spaces in her gums that once held two teeth.
“I was going to say the same thing.” Angel playfully pushed her as he went to retrieve his things.
“Come on A‟ we have to go, mommy should be out front waiting for us.”
“Thank you Mr. Donnelly!” The pair gathered their book bags and headed out the door.
“You two are very welcome, and don‟t forget about the fair tomorrow.”
Mr. Donnelly smiled as the two siblings scurried off unaware of the troubles that lay before them.

Sean sat inside the black C-class Mercedes tapping the steering wheel as he waited for his kids to get out of school. Since him and Jai split up; she had informed the principle not to allow the children to leave with anyone else but her. He felt like a spectator, an observer watching his life play out behind a twoway mirror.

Just as he was beginning to get agitated thinking about the situation he saw his baby girl emerge followed by her brother; “My babies.”