Stronger By Your Side (Great Love Book 2) (14 page)

I caught Travis’s stare as I watched Sawyer with the three little girls, and my smile dropped. He smiled at me and I took a deep breath, nodding back. I didn’t want to have feelings for Sawyer in the first place. I sure didn’t need anyone knowing I had them, especially not Travis or Sawyer for that matter.

As the carnival was wrapping up, Jules showed up from the pie eating contest that she hosted. “Hey, Where’s my girl?”

I turned around, grabbed Charlotte and threw her in the air. “Right here.”

Charlotte squealed. “Grammy!” I smiled at the happiness in her voice. Charlotte had heard a girl in her class talking about her Grammy. She automatically asked me if Jules was hers and I said yes, because she was. In every way, she was. The name warmed my heart and the look in Jules’s eyes every time Charlotte said it told me that it warmed hers, too. She would always be Charlotte’s Grammy, no matter what.

Jules grabbed her and tickled her. “Hey, pretty girl, ready to stay the night?”

Charlotte nodded. “Yup!” I gave her a kiss and thanked Jules.

When I walked back to the group, Cal and Emerson were kissing the twins goodbye and handing them over to Cal’s parents. I was shocked, truly shocked, to see Travis and Sawyer standing a few feet from them talking about Travis starting at the police academy next week.

I walked up to the two men just as Emerson and Cal approached hand in hand. “Hey, you two, you staying for the fun?”

Emerson hollered. “Woo!” I laughed and Cal shook his head.

“You know it, girl.” I turned around to see Sarah walking up behind me with her arms stretched out.

“Eeek!” Emerson jumped up.

I turned around and hugged her. “Long time no see,” I joked, and she huffed.

“Yeah, well, I played hooky from work.”

I turned to Sawyer and pointed back to Sarah. “SJ . . . I mean, Sawyer, this is Sarah. Sarah, this is Sawyer.”

She looked him up and down and then froze. “Oh. My. God.”

We all stopped and stared at her, but my heart began beating faster when I noticed her face. Oh no. “Oh my God, it’s you! The mysterious bar kisser!” My cheeks immediately burned and I threw my hands over my face. Damn Sarah and her appreciation for the male form.

Sawyer laughed with his hands up. “Caught me.” Emerson gasped. I slowly peeked from my hands to see Cal staring at me with his mouth agape, and Sawyer’s smile. Travis already knew, but I could swear he looked upset as well.

I cleared my throat and then, giving into the stares, I blurted out faster than lightning, “Fine, SJ and I grew up together, we were best friends growing up, haven’t seen him in eight years, ran into him at the bar . . . we kissed. Nothing more, just friends, done.” I took a deep breath and exhaled.

Sawyer licked his lips and tried to hold back his smile. Travis and Cal just looked confused, and Emerson and Sarah beamed at me.

“So . . . ” Travis said and then cleared his voice. “The town bar and pub, Ed’s Place, is having the county dance. Want to walk that way?”

I nodded. “Yes!” Then I grabbed Sarah’s hand and pulled her swiftly with me.

“Whoa . . . ” She complained. I leaned into her and whispered.

“Seriously? I’m going to—”

She laughed. “Kill me? My God, if I had a dollar for every time Em threatened that . . . ”

I snorted. “She did so with good reason, I’m sure.”

Suddenly Emerson was next to us walking. “That’s for sure.”

Sarah rolled her eyes and laughed. “Whatever, let’s have a good time, ladies.”

Emerson and I laughed in unison and said, “Fine.”

Turns out that being outed as the long lost best friend-slash-random guy Megan made out with at the bar was a little awkward. However, in the end, it worked in my favor. Cal and Travis had welcomed me into the group after a little interrogation. The girls were oblivious to the strand of questions that Travis and Cal both gave me. My answers seemed to soothe them. I was honest and I think they sensed that. We had smooth conversation ever since they settled their insecurities about me. The very small, hole-in-the-wall bar extended into the street and alleyway for the after carnival country dance. A live bland played in the street out front and people danced and hollered. We were sitting at one of the bars set up out on the street next to the band. The three girls giggled and whispered as they sipped their drinks. I couldn’t help that my eyes wandered over Megan’s body a few times. Every time they did, I caught Travis staring at me.

“So, Sawyer . . . ” Cal began, and Megan perked up and leaned over to listen. “How did Meg get her nickname?”

Megan’s face turned a dark shade of pink and I couldn’t help but grin. Everyone looked over at Megan with pleading eyes. She sighed. “Fine.” Then she shook her head and placed it in her hands. I told them about how Megan ate too many pies on Thanksgiving when we were seven, and how she was so strung up on sugar that she called herself Pumpkin Girl and ran around the yard like she was a superhero.

Everyone chuckled and when Megan glared at Sarah, she covered her mouth and then put on a serious face. “Not funny.”

Megan smiled. “Fine, it’s kind of funny.”

Travis grinned. “Classic.”

I shook my head. “Anyway, Pumpkin Girl just stuck. My parents even called her that, but after a while it turned into just Pumpkin.”

Cal laughed. “Nice, Meg.” Megan shook her head and rubbed her neck.

“Anyway, that’s that.” I looked at her and could see in her eyes that she was uncomfortable, like she didn’t want me saying anything else about her past. Wanting to put her fears to rest, I winked. That seemed to have the opposite reaction, because her face turned darker red and her eyes widened.

We all drank slowly and talked about random things. Cal and Emerson left us to dance to a few songs. Sarah and Travis even took to the dance floor a couple of times, which had me silently wondering what was going on between them. Sarah insisted that it was just fun, but Travis stayed silent and drank his beer instead of speaking. He seemed to be slowly warming up to me. It was obvious he had a thing for Sarah, and with good reason. Sarah was a little taller than five feet and maybe weighed a buck ten. She was slightly curvy, had wavy, dark blonde hair, and light blue eyes that were brighter than I had ever seen. She had a wicked smile and a personality that could kill. Despite all these things, she wasn’t for me. Simply because she wasn’t Megan. Every woman I had found in the last eight years simply hadn’t been for me, for that very reason. I couldn’t lie and say I wasn’t pleased to see Travis’s obvious interest in Sarah. That meant his hostility towards me last night didn’t mean he had feelings for Megan, simply that he was protective of her—and for good reason.

I shook my head as I took a long pull of my beer. I couldn’t help my eyes travelling up and down Megan’s lean body once again. I took another sip and thought about how Megan had been my girl since I could remember. She was a little taller than most girls and lean. She had just enough curves for her long legs. She had smooth, light caramel skin, gray eyes, and long, black hair. Her smile was genuine and her personality was sweet, truly sweet. As if my thoughts of her summoned her to me, her eyes shot up to mine. We held our gaze as we both took a drink and then placed them down. The others were all talking to each other and having a good time, so maybe we would go unnoticed. Very unlikely. The second I decided to make a move, everyone’s eyes darted to us.
Oh well.

I closed the distance between Megan and me in a couple of brief steps. “Hi, Beautiful.”

She smiled. “Really, SJ?”

I shrugged. “Why Not? I’m just telling the truth.” Her face went sad, and all I wanted to do was wipe off the frown and replace it with a grin. I decided that was exactly what I would do. A cover of Dierk Bentley’s song,
Riser
, began playing. It felt all too perfect and it gave me an idea. “Dance with me?”

I placed my hand out and Megan smiled. “Sure.”

I nodded, a little surprised at her willingness and then, with her hand in mine, I guided her out to the dance floor. I didn’t miss Sarah’s whistles and hollers. Megan just shook her head as we began to sway. “Ignore her.”

I nodded down at her and our eyes met. “I plan to.” She swallowed slowly and my heart began to beat faster. Realizing how I was affecting her gave me hope.

I twirled Megan around and then smoothly pulled her back closer to me. She smiled wide and then, as I swayed her to the left, she laughed. I smiled down at her, loving the way her smile affected me, loving her. As our pace slowed, I decided to leave a piece of my heart on the dance floor, see how it went. The band sang and we swayed. I leaned in a little closer. I whispered low and raspy, trying not to let all of my emotion show.

“I heard this song a couple of months ago and thought of you, Pumpkin.” She leaned back and our eyes met again. I took a deep breath as she searched my soul. I whispered in her ear again and felt her skin grow goose bumps. “I thought about you a lot, Meg . . . and I can be all these things for you.” She leaned back and her eyes connected with mine. She didn’t speak, but she nodded and then gently laid her head on my chest. Pleased with the emotions I read in her face, I swayed her slowly, soaking up the sensation of her in my arms again. We danced in silence, and when the song was done, I kissed the top of her head. “Thanks for the dance, Pumpkin.”

Megan stepped back from me and nodded again with a weak smile. Her eyes were glossy with an emotion I oddly couldn’t read, and her cheeks were pink. I watched her chest rise and fall slowly for a moment and then nodded back. I grabbed her hand lightly and was surprised when she didn’t fight it. She just let me tug her with me, back to where the others sat.

Sarah shot up. “Looking for a repeat of the bar!” I laughed at Sarah’s over-the-top personality. It was definitely entertaining.

Travis smiled at me, but I didn’t miss the slight tick of his jaw. I wasn’t quite sure if that was due to me or due to Sarah’s behavior. I shrugged and looked down at Megan, who looked like she was going to puke. I flipped myself so I was in front of her, shielding her from the others, and bent down so we were eye level. She just stared forward, and it was a look I had seen before. This was the look she had every time I found her hurt. It was her ashamed and in shock look. Damn.

I didn’t realize how my feelings for her, or even her feelings for me, would affect her right now. I sighed and then whispered low. “Meg, honey. It’s okay. It’s just me. It’s SJ.” At the sound of my name, Megan’s eyes looked up at mine, and her tear-filled eyes blinked at me. I wiped her tears with my thumbs and then whispered again. “Hey, it’s okay, I’ll get you home, okay?” She took a deep breath and nodded. I turned around, keeping Megan at my back, and tried to play off a smile. Cal and Travis had their brows raised at me, and the girls both looked concerned. Just when I was going to open my mouth and say . . .
what? I don’t know
. . . Megan’s hands gently grabbed my arm and she stepped next to me.

Sarah cleared her throat and then said low, “I’m so sorry.”

Megan smiled and waved her hand at her. “No no, silly, I just don’t feel well all of a sudden. I think it’s the drinks, I don’t drink often.” She shrugged and smiled sweetly again. Sarah nodded with a slight smile. “Anyway,” Megan continued, “SJ, will you walk me home?”

I looked down at her and smiled lightly. “Of course, Pumpkin.” She nodded and then proceeded to give everyone goodbye hugs. I shook Cal’s and Travis’s hands and told Cal I would see him around. Our fire stations were doing some forest fire training together in the next few weeks. Emerson and Sarah both gave me hugs.

Megan and I began walking towards her apartment and, to my surprise, she reached down and laced our fingers. I looked down at our intertwined hands and then at her. She avoided my eyes and instead focused on the walk in front of us. I smiled and then reminded myself that there was a time in our past when this, holding hands like this, was normal, when it didn’t mean anything. Trying to pretend like it meant nothing to me now was near impossible. Eight years made my feelings stronger than I could have imagined. Trying not to get my hopes up was hard, so I copied Megan and focused on walking.

When we got to Megan’s apartment, she gently tugged me up the stairs with her and then, when she reached the door, she took out her keys and unlocked the door. Like I was going to run if she did, she didn’t let go of my hand the entire time. When the door was finally unlocked she pulled me in the door, closed it behind us, and locked it. A little curious as to what she was doing, I just stared down at her the entire time, trying to hold back my smile. She flipped around to look at me, never letting go of my hand, and I cocked my brow.

“What are you doing, Pumpkin?”

Megan put her finger to my mouth. “Shh. Just . . . just stop for one second.”

I chuckled quietly and stared down at her concerned face. She was thinking, possibly about kissing me, so I chose to push her just a little. “Don’t think too hard, Pumpkin, your face will get stuck like that.” That seemed to break her concentration, because her shoulders dropped and she stuck her tongue out at me. “Showing off that sweet thing isn’t a better choice, sweetheart.”

Megan stopped and glared at me and then laughed. “You are ridiculous.”

I shrugged. “Possibly.”

Her hand still in mine, I lifted our laced fingers up to draw attention to them. “Want to tell me what’s going on in that pretty head of yours?”

Megan closed one eye and twisted her mouth. I couldn’t help but stare at her soft pink lips. “I was thinking about kissing you again.” Always so honest.

I smiled. “Yeah? I’m not running.”

Megan smiled, and I kissed her hand that I was holding. “It’s not a good idea.”

I raised my brow. “It’s a fantastic idea.” She laughed and then, to my dismay, slipped her soft little hand out of mine and stepped back.

I threw my hand over my heart and pretended to be wounded. “Ouch, Meg. That hurts.”

She laughed. “Oh you’ll live. Want a coffee? Hot cocoa? Water?”

I laughed. “Hot chocolate sounds awesome.”

Megan nodded with a smile and disappeared around the corner into her kitchen. I followed her and leaned against the wall, watching her make our drinks. With her back to me, she spoke low. “So I was wondering . . . ” I just watched her, willing myself not to love her, and waited for her to continue. “Want to watch a movie or something?”

I laughed quietly to myself and ran my hand down my face. She was slowly torturing me, possibly unware of it. “Love to.” The word seemed to make her still for a moment, and damn if it didn’t make me smile wider. Megan handed me my hot chocolate in a large mug. “Thanks.”

She nodded and smiled that sweet smile again. “Wait!” I stilled, and then she smiled again. “Marshmallows!”

I laughed. “Yeah, sure.” She pointed at me and winked, then skipped to the cupboard. She grabbed a handful out of the bag and then sprinkled some on both of our drinks.

“So, you want to tell me what that was about on the dance floor?”

She huffed and dropped her head, then quickly looked up at me. “Not really.”

I just stared her down with one of my you’re-going-to-tell-me-eventually-so-you-might-as-well-do-it-now looks that I used to use on her all the time as kids. Just like old times, she cracked with a slight smile and a shake of her head.

“You suck. Yeah, fine. Grab your cocoa, I’ll met you at the couch.”

I nodded and yelled over my shoulder, “No procrastinating, best to just get it over with.”

Megan laughed from the kitchen and then reappeared with her drink in hand. She sat next to me, and it took everything in me not to touch her. I took a sip of my cocoa instead. “So . . . ”

She sighed and copied me. “So, I don’t really know what that was about. I was thinking about what you said on the dance floor. Then I was thinking about kissing you, and then Charles’s face popped into my head. I don’t know.” She shrugged her shoulders then continued, “I guess I felt guilty, and then embarrassed . . . and I just froze.”

I frowned, and then with a nod, I smiled weakly. “I can see how you are a little confused.”

She smiled up at me sweetly and then took a sip of her cocoa. “Thanks for understanding my weirdness.”

I laughed. “You’ve always been weird, Meg. I’ve always understood.”

She laughed and lightly slapped my arm. “Thanks, pal.” I frowned, not liking those words from her mouth. She shook her head and then said, “So, although I keep thinking about kissing you, do you think you can do me a favor?”

I raised my brows. “Depends. What?”

She smiled, then sighed. “Don’t let me kiss you.”

I laughed. “Yeah, no.”

She laughed and then whined. “SJ, please, I’m too confused right now, I just need you to be my SJ right now. I just need my best friend back. Maybe one day we can talk about the rest.”