Summer by the Sea (11 page)

Nan nodded as if she remembered.

“My other favorite was ‘The Gift Outright’.”

“I remember that one,” Nan said. “He wrote it in Key West. I only remember that because you told me about a thousand times. You were obsessed with Key West.”

“I was,” she laughed at the memory of it. “I wanted to go there more than anywhere in the world. I remember thinking how it was the place of poets, of writers. I loved reading so much that it romanticized Key West in my young mind.”

“You never went, did you?”

“No.” Thinking about it now, Faith realized that she had bestowed her obsession with reading on to her students, feeding their love for books and encouraging their passion. It only crossed her mind just now that she’d forgotten what had made
her
enthusiastic about reading. How long had it been since she’d read something just for herself? …Since she’d gotten completely lost in a book like she had in her childhood? She wanted to feel that excitement again for herself. “Maybe one day,” she said. She dropped the photo back in and took in all of the different photos that were in the box. There were so many.

“Good memories?” Nan asked with a smile.

Faith nodded and reached in again without being prompted. This time, her fingers caught a thick square of paper. She pulled it out and turned it over in her hand. It was a photo of her grandfather, John. On the back, in penciled script, it read, “Sophia and John, 1945.”

“I was twenty,” her nan said with a smile and a shift in her seat. “That’s your grandpa with me.”

Nan leaned in closely as Faith held the photo nearer to get a better look. Nan had a white pencil skirt with a white fitted shirt and black belt. She was wearing black open-toed heels, and her dark hair was in pinned-back waves. She looked gorgeous. Standing beside Nan was Faith’s grandfather who looked familiar to her and like a stranger at the same time. She’d seen countless photos of him over the years—so many that she felt like she knew him—but he was just a frozen image to her, not the real-life warm, kind man Nan had often described.

Faith reached in and found another photo. This one was of Nan and her grandfather grinning together in the chair of a Ferris wheel as their chair sat at the bottom of the platform either before or after the ride. Faith noted her grandfather’s arm around Nan, the way his fingers were resting on her shoulder, the tilt of her head toward him and her smile. Who was this man whom her Nan had loved so much? What was he like? When Faith was just beginning to talk, she couldn’t say the word “grandmother.” She could only say “Nan,” so it had stuck. This man in the photo had never had the opportunity to know his own grandchildren. She didn’t have a name for him. He was always just her “grandfather” or “John.” Until now, she’d never thought about him really. But now, seeing him with Nan made her wonder about him.

“These are great pictures, Nan,” Faith said, her mind going back to that time long ago when Nan had been healthy and happy. Faith looked over at her, and wished she’d made more of an effort to see her. Faith felt guilty because her nan had always been there for her and helped her through difficult times, but Faith had never really talked to Nan about her past, about being without her grandfather. What were those nights like for so many years without her grandfather by Nan’s side? How strong her grandmother must be because never once growing up had she seen anything other than happiness in Nan’s eyes. Had her grandmother been lonely? Heartbroken? If she had, she’d never let it show.

Faith looked back down at the man in the photo, wishing she had known him. She’d spent her whole life with only women. Her mother had done a wonderful job raising her, and her grandmother was one of her favorite people in the entire world. Even Casey had given her many fond memories of childhood. Faith had wanted for nothing. But deep down inside her, somewhere where she’d tucked it away, she wished to have had a grandfather and father like her friends had. When she looked at Nan in those photos, the idea of having her own family slinked its way into her consciousness, especially now after spending time with Isabella—seeing the family bond through the eyes of her little niece.

“May I keep these?” she asked.

“Of course. They’re for you.”

“Thank you,” she said. She didn’t want to think about the other photos of her and her family that were probably in the box. When the memories of their childhood took hold in her mind, she almost couldn’t bear the fact that she’d stayed away so much. She also didn’t want to think about the reason Nan was giving them all away now. It was all so heavy that Faith couldn’t let it enter her mind. This was supposed to be fun. And she was nearly sure that Nan felt the same way or she wouldn’t have planned it. It was Nan’s birthday soon! That was cause for celebration, not sadness.

Nan obviously felt the same way, and changed the subject. “So, how was sailing yesterday? You all were out all day. I assume it was enjoyable.”

“It was fantastic. In fact, Jake is so thoughtful and friendly. I’m still amazed that he invited us—complete strangers—to go sailing with him. That was very nice of him, wasn’t it?”

“Yes, it was.”

“I wonder why he did that?” The question had been playing on her mind.

“You should ask him.”

Faith thought about what he’d said at the surf shop, how he’d asked the whole family because he didn’t think she’d go on her own. What she really wanted to ask was why he wanted her in particular to go sailing? What did he find so special about her? Especially when he’d turned right around and asked Casey to go fishing.

“I wouldn’t ask him, Nan.”

“Why not?” Nan was grinning at Faith, her eyes playful, and Faith felt the tingle of heat in her face. Could Nan see something between her and Jake?

“It would be rude to ask him such a question,” she said.

“What question?” she heard from behind her and her heart jumped into her throat. Faith hadn’t known him long, but she’d known him long enough to recognize his voice. She turned to see her mom standing next to Jake in the open door. He was in his work clothes, so he must have been outside working.

“Oh, Jake, I’m glad you’re here,” Nan said. “Faith wants to ask you something and I have an idea for some built-ins I’d love to run by you. I think you may like it.”

Why was Nan putting her in this position? She didn’t want to ask Jake anything. She’d told her that! Nan was all smiles, her eyes darting from Faith to Jake and back, but didn’t she realize that she was putting Faith in an embarrassing situation?

Jake grabbed a paper towel off the roll in the kitchen, still looking at Faith as if he was waiting for her to say something. When she didn’t, he said, “Well, I’ll be out on the porch.”

After he left, Faith looked over at Nan, scolding her with her eyes. “Why did you do that?” she asked. It was a direct question, and she wasn’t overly harsh about it, but she wanted to know.

“It’s important not to let things go unsaid,” she said, her expression gentle. Her face was the way it had been when she’d tucked Faith into bed on those nights when her mom was working. It wasn’t the same as having her mother tuck her in, but Nan was so warm and loving that she had no problem falling asleep. Nan would read her a story first, and then she always found a way to bring that story around to real life. She’d talk to Faith, her words smooth like silk, as Faith’s eyelids would drop. Faith would work to keep them open so that she could hear what Nan was saying, but sleep won every time. Finally, somewhere in the middle of a sentence, as Nan spoke, her eyes would close for the last time, and she’d drift off into dreamland. “He’s just a person, Faith. Just someone with insecurities and worries and a yearning to be happy. You don’t talk enough to people. You keep all your emotions bottled up. When you let someone in on those thoughts, you’re showing that you trust them. But first, you have to trust yourself.”

Nan’s words calmed her, easing her back to normal. She felt like herself again. Faith knew exactly what Nan was saying. She’d gotten better at talking to people over the years and she’d begun to trust herself. But still, it didn’t come easily to her, and instead of taking a leap into the unknown she’d hold back. Nan gave her an encouraging look.

“Make this old woman feel like she’s making an impression on you even if she isn’t.” She winked at her. “Humor me.”

Faith huffed out a chuckle and shook her head as she stood up and straightened her clothes. Then, with a grin in Nan’s direction, she walked to the door and went outside.

When she rounded the corner of the porch, leading to the long stretch that faced the ocean, she found Jake squatting down near a window, a putty knife in his hand. He was filling in an empty space around a window frame. She noticed the slight golden stubble on his face, almost reddish in the sunlight, and the way the lines on his forehead pulled downward in concentration. He wiped the knife on the paper towel and stood up to greet her.

“Hi,” she said.

“Hey.” He pulled up one of the rockers and offered her a seat.

She sat down, and he joined her in the other chair. The air was warm on her skin. She looked at the ocean, the sun blazing out over the beach. She put her bare feet up on the rung of the rocker and leaned forward to take in more of the view. A woman was out walking her dog, the surf coming up on its paws. The dog didn’t seem to mind as it walked along beside the woman, its tail wagging furiously. Two boys were throwing a Frisbee, and a plane flew overhead, a banner trailing behind it, advertising an all-you-can-eat seafood buffet. She squinted to make out Casey down below, Isabella in her pink swimsuit, building a sandcastle. She smiled to herself.

“Were you going to ask me something?”

“Oh.” She looked back at Jake, wondering how to phrase her question. “I had a lot of fun yesterday on the boat,” she said, scrambling for words. He smiled, and he seemed genuinely glad to hear it. “I was just wondering…” she broke eye contact in an effort to get out what she wanted to say, “why you would invite a complete stranger to sail with you. It seems like an awfully big thank-you for asking you to breakfast.”

He let out a little cough of laugher. “It’s really nothing,” he said, flashing that smile that sent her heart pattering. “I enjoy meeting new folks, and you and your family seem like great people.”

She wanted to ask him why she was so ‘great’ in particular, but he’d already stood up and was putting the rocking chair back in its place. His answer had been polite and acceptable, but she wondered if there was a reason he was holding back.

“I think your grandmother wanted to talk to me about some suggestions for the cottage,” he said.

“Wait,” she said, standing to stop him. He turned around. “You could tell when my stomach hurt yesterday.” His brows creased in the middle, showing his attempt to make sense of where that comment was going. “You could just tell, right?” He nodded, still unsure, clearly of her point. “Well, I can just tell that there’s another reason you asked us to go sailing. I can’t imagine that you go around being this nice to people all day long. It would be exhausting.” She smiled to show her humor. “What is it that made you offer? Tell me.” She took a step closer to him, her heart beating so fast she worried he could feel it in the air around them, but it was worth asking.

He smiled, his face gentle. “I like your family in particular,” he admitted. “I don’t know why—maybe it’s your Nan’s frankness; it reminds me of my father. Or, maybe it’s little Isabella; I’ve never had any kids, and I love kids. Or maybe…” He stopped.

Maybe what?
She was willing him to finish. She’d never met another human being who could cause this kind of intensity in her. She was not going to let him move until he finished that sentence. Maybe he liked being around
her
. That’s what she wanted to hear. “Maybe what,” she finally verbalized when she realized he wasn’t going to say anything more.

He cleared his throat. “It’s good getting to know you.”

“Me?” It was a question but she stated it rather than asking because she wanted to hear it aloud to make sure she was right. He said it felt good to be around
her
.

“Yeah,” he said softly. “You keep a lot of who you are on the inside, and it’s fun to see if I can figure you out.” His amusement came out as a little puff of air, and he shook his head. Before she could add anything else, he said, “Now, I must see what your grandmother has to say about
improvements
.”

“Oh, goodness. Don’t feel like you have to listen to her. She’s very opinionated,” she said, but she was still processing the conversation they’d just had. She wanted to know more about why he enjoyed finding out about her so much. Why did he even care?

He laughed again, making the flutters return. “I don’t mind.”

She followed him inside. Nan had been right. Talking to Jake was easy. A little too easy. And with that buzzy feeling zinging around inside her, Faith decided to get ready for the beach and join her sister and Isabella. It was a gorgeous day. Best she take full advantage of it. Her fondness for Jake worried her a little, and she’d rather think about something lighter than falling for a guy she hardly knew and who lived a state away. While Jake was chatting with Nan, Faith grabbed the box of photos and took them into her bedroom. She set them down on the bedspread, the bright white wicker of the footboard contrasting with the battered brown edges of the box. She rifled through her suitcase and pulled out her swimsuit.

“Hey there,” her mother said from the doorway. “Oh, what is that?” She began walking toward the bed, eyeing the box.

“Nan brought me her photos.” Her mother opened the box and peered inside.

“Ha!” she pulled out a photo and turned it around for Faith to view. Faith couldn’t help herself; she started giggling. “Remember when you two were dressed up as scarecrows?” she said, looking at the picture and shaking her head, her chest still rising and falling with quiet laughter. “The straw kept falling out of your outfit and, as we walked, I had to tuck it back in. By the time we finished trick-or-treating, you were ‘The Skinny Scarecrow’ and Casey was ‘The Fat One’.” Then her face sobered. “Oh, sometimes I miss those days. They were tough, but boy were they fun.” She put the photo back into the box. “Where’re you headed?”