Sweet Serendipity (14 page)

“I know that, Emily. I’m not trying to rush her, obviously. I’ve been treading lightly around her. I’m well aware of the walls she’s built up. I have no problem helping her break it down brick by brick if, in the end, there is a new beginning.”

“Wow, Ethan, that’s very poetic.” Emily clasped an angel figurine to her chest.

“Please, you give me far too much credit. Do you know I hadn’t been able to pick up a paint brush for a long time before I met her? When I saw her sitting at the East Bay Grille, the way she looked and the way the light cascaded off of her...I just knew I had to know her. It was instant inspiration.”

“So you are painting again?”

“I can’t stop! I spend most of my days in the studio now. I figured while she’s figuring everything out, I’d give her space.”

“So then you don’t know about Tasha? You haven’t heard around town?” Emily asked him.

“NO! What?”

“She has cervical cancer. She had surgery, but the doctor told us that the surgery didn’t remove all the cancer. It has already spread too far in her body. She’s dying.” Emily started to cry.

“Oh, Emily, I had no idea. I knew I hadn’t seen her around, but I hadn’t heard.”

“Becca and Tasha have known each other since freshman year in high school. She’s taking it very hard. The kids came back from Florida early, after they found out. That’s the reason why Jack was over there. It wasn’t because he’s back there. She’s just having a really hard time, and when Tasha gets out of the hospital she’s going to be staying at Becca’s.”

“Do you think Becca would want to see me? I should go see her, right?” Ethan asked questioningly.

“I personally think that’s exactly what Becca needs.”

“I’ll head over later on tonight once everyone is settled in for the night,” Ethan told her. He grasped Emily’s hand and held it. “I’ll do whatever any of you need. I actually have a friend who owns a healing center in town. They do things like tong ren, chi gung, and reiki. I have heard some pretty amazing stories of people who have made miraculous recoveries.”

“I’ve heard people talk about stuff like that, but I’ve never really read up on it. You should make sure you tell Becca about all of that. She needs something to hope for.” Emily wiped her face with her tissue.

A customer walked into the store and smiled at them.

“Well, I’d better get back. You take care, Emily, and if you need anything, you know where to find me.”

“Sure thing, Ethan. Thanks! She watched him walk out and smiled to herself. She knew that Ethan was Becca’s future, even if Becca didn’t know it yet.

Rebecca tucked Adam into bed. She kissed him gently on his forehead and walked out of the room. He was still angry with her about the whole Jack situation. She had to admit that she herself was feeling conflicted. She had a long history with Jack. They had been through hell and back together, and somewhere along the line, they just stopped. They stopped trying, they stopped loving, and they stopped talking. She had loved him from the moment they first met. She had always thought that they would last forever, but there are some hurts you can’t get past, no matter how you try to fix them.

She walked down the hall and poked her head into Riley’s room. She was sitting at her desk typing on her computer.

“Hey, sweetie, whatcha doing?”

Riley looked up at her mom and smiled.

“Hi, Mom. I have a book report for summer reading on Marie Antoinette.”

“Oh. What did you think of the book?” Rebecca asked her.

“I’m a little indifferent. I honestly don’t enjoy reading historical works. I had a hard time forcing myself to make it to the end.”

“Well, maybe when you are a little older you will appreciate it. It’s not Twilight.”

Riley let out a laugh.

“Yeah, definitely not. Now if I could have had credit for all of those books.”

“Well, I’ll let you get back. Don’t stay up too late. You have to help at Solstice tomorrow.”

Rebecca turned to walk out of the room when Riley called out to her.

“Hey, Mom?”

“Yeah baby?”

“It really sucks what Aunt Tasha is going through. It just shows that you never know what life is going to throw at you, especially after losing Brian the way we did.”

Rebecca hurried to Riley and wrapped her arms around her.

“You don’t have to talk about him, Riley.”

“I know, but if I had just stayed home and babysat him, he’d still be here.”

“Riley, you know that you had nothing to do with it. It was a horrible accident. I live with it every day. If I hadn’t been selfish and gone shopping with Tasha and Emily he’d still be here. There are so many what ifs. We can’t live in what ifs.”

“I know, Mom. It’s just hard sometimes. If Brian hadn’t died, would you and Dad have gotten divorced? Or would we still be a family?”

“Oh baby! I don’t have an answer to that. Your dad and I had our own problems. We can’t change the past; we just have to move forward. I am thankful every day that you and Adam are healthy and we have each other, that’s what matters.”

“What about the guy you were seeing, the one with the motorcycle? Are you still seeing him?”

“I don’t know. There are too many things going on for me to even think about dating.”

“Mom, you are so young and pretty. Don’t throw away a chance to be happy because of us, and I certainly know Aunt Tasha would kick your butt if you don’t try.”

Rebecca cracked a smile.

“Sometimes I think you spend too much time with Tasha. You are beginning to sound like her.”

“Well you are a great mom, no matter what we tell you. You should be happy.”

Rebecca hugged her daughter and looked her in her big brown eyes.

“I really don’t know when it was that you suddenly grew into such a smart, loving young lady, but you make me proud.” She kissed her on the top of her head. “Don’t work too hard, kiddo. I’ll be heading to bed soon. I love you.”

“I love you too, Mom.”

Rebecca slowly closed her daughter’s bedroom door and walked quietly down the stairs to make a cup of tea. The house was dark and quiet. She turned the stove on and the phone rang. She looked at her clock and noticed that it was close to 10:00 PM. She quickly picked it up thinking it might be about Tasha. Jack’s voice quickly scrapped that idea.

“Hi Jack,” she said.

“Hey Becky. I just wanted to see how you were holding up.”

“I’m still here. It’s kind of late, Jack.”

“Oh, yeah I guess it is. I just left Richard’s house. Is there any chance you’re up for a little company? I’m only a few minutes down the road.”

“That’s not such a good idea, Jack. Adam is already confused and angry with me. Besides, you sound like you’ve been drinking.”

“Oh, Becky, come on. I could really use the company. Yes, I had like three drinks. Richard needed an outlet, so we went out for a few drinks to take his mind off of things.”

“I’m going to go, Jack. Go home and get a good night’s sleep. We’re all dealing with a lot.”

“That’s the point, Rebecca. We are…dealing. Are we ever going to move past it, though?”

The line was suddenly quiet. She knew the conversation was turning away from Tasha.

“Now is not the time. We’ve had our time to try to work things through, Jack. You turned to Amber, you…found your way to deal with things.”

“No! That’s not fair Becky. You shut me out. You locked yourself down. You couldn’t even look at me. I think this is the most talking we’ve done in the last year.”

“I can’t do this now. Not with my best friend dying. It’s not fair.”

“Neither is this.” The line went quiet. “I want to see you. I need to see you.”

“Not tonight, Jack. Go home and sleep it off. We’ll talk some other time.”

“I made an appointment to go and talk to someone. I’d like it if you’d consider joining me.”

“I think that’s great, Jack. I think it will help you tremendously. You don’t need me to go.”

“I’d like you to go. I’m sorry it has taken me this long to make the appointment.”

“Jack, I’m going to go now.” She could feel her eyes welling up with tears. “I can’t do this with you right now.”

The phone was silent for a few moments. Rebecca could have sworn she could hear Jack crying. It broke her heart even more.

“Alright, Becky. I’ll call you tomorrow and see how everything is.” They were quiet. “I love you, Becky.” She couldn’t answer him. She just hung up the phone and leaned against the kitchen wall with tears streaming down her face.

The tea kettle whistled. She took a deep breath, lifted it off the burner, and placed it on a cooling rack. Her heart ached. She felt so overwhelmed with the flashes of the past. She had always remained strong for her children. She never wanted to let them see her cry. She walked into the family room and picked up a photograph. She looked at it and swiped her hand across it; her little Brian, now her little angel. She clutched it to her chest and tried to imagine the little boy running through that very room. He would have been four, but fate had a different destiny for him.

There was a gentle knock on the side door by the kitchen. She snapped out of her daydream and looked at the clock. It was after 10:00 PM and she was starting to get irritated. She had told Jack not to come. He just never listened.

She angrily made her way to the door while still grasping the photo of Brian. She ripped the side door open expecting to lay into Jack, but to her surprise, Ethan stood there. He took one look at her, took a step into the house, and wrapped her in his arms. She found herself grabbing hold of him in return. He gently closed the door behind him and just stood there holding her. She held her face to his chest and cried. He ran his hand down the back of her hair and gently petted her.

“It’s OK, Becca. Just let it out. I’m not going anywhere.”

They stood on her tiled hallway embracing for what felt like hours, but she knew it was at least a good fifteen minutes. She raised her head and looked at him. Even through all her pain, she found that when she looked into his beautiful eyes, she felt that she could have the possibility of happiness in her future.

She finally released her grip on him and wiped her face.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

“You don’t ever have to apologize to me, Becca.” He followed her into the kitchen and she stood by the table. “What is that that you are holding?” he asked her.

She reluctantly held it out to him. He looked at the photo and smiled.

“He looks just like you. Is this your son?”

She held her head down.

“Yes. He died a little over a year ago.”

Ethan was dumbstruck, he had no idea. No one had mentioned anything to him, although, he understood that the death of a child was not something openly discussed with a virtual stranger.

“I’m sorry, Becca, I had no idea.”

She looked over at him and forced a smile.

“It’s alright. It’s not exactly something you open up a conversation with when you meet someone.”

“Do you mind my asking what happened?”

“I was out for the afternoon with Emily and Tasha. I left the kids at home with Jack. Riley went out with some of her friends so it was only the two boys. Jack had fallen asleep on the couch. The boys were playing hide and seek upstairs. Brian climbed up on top of Riley’s bureau to hide behind her curtain. Our screens are pop out screens, they are not very secured. We usually only open the top half of the windows for safety reasons. For some reason, Riley’s were open at the bottom. Brian crawled into the window sill to hide behind the curtain. He pushed too hard on the screen and it popped out. He fell three stories and died on impact. No one even heard him scream. Jack didn’t even know it happened until a neighbor called 911, and the sirens blared in the front yard. He was asleep, and Adam had lost interest in finding Brian so he went in his room to play video games.” She fell down into a chair and covered her face. “If I had been home the window never would have been open. He’d still be here.”

“You can’t do that to yourself, Becca. It was a horrible accident.”

“I thought I was at peace with it all, but Riley brought it up tonight. She blames herself. She was going to babysit and chose to go out with her friends instead. I can’t have her thinking it was her fault. She’s just a child herself. She blames herself because it was her window.”

“I understand how that can be a hard thing for a young girl to take in. She’ll learn to accept it in her own way. Everyone grieves differently.” He swept a long strand of hair out of her face.

“Is that when things started to go badly in your marriage?”

“We had our issues before the accident, but I think deep down I blame him. He never should have fallen asleep. Brian was three years old. You don’t fall asleep while a little one is running around. I couldn’t look at him for a long time. Sometimes it’s still hard.”

“Did you guys ever go into counseling with one another?”

“I went. Jack refused. He said he didn’t need to pay someone to tell him it was his fault.”

“That’s got to be a hard thing to live with. Guilt can wreak havoc physically and mentally. I’m sorry you ever had to go through any of this, Becca. You deserve to put the pain behind you and be happy.”