Sweet Surrendering (36 page)

I got two all caps text messages the next day, one each from Marisol and Chloe. Apparently, Lucah had sent beautiful flower arrangements to each of them with a note asking them to the ball.

They were both ecstatic, even Chloe who claimed she’d never been on a date with a man, but was willing to make an exception. Sloane texted me and she was less enthused because they each wanted dresses and that was going to be hard to finish in time, with the event only a little more than two weeks away. Sloane thrived on pressure, but she bitched about it every step of the way. I had no doubt in my mind that she’d finish. I’d just have to hear her whine and complain the entire time, but I guess that was part of the fun of living with her.

I texted Lucah and told him, and he grinned over his desk at me and sent a message back.

What can I say? The ladies love me.
I sighed loud enough for him to hear and texted him back.

Don’t let your head get too big or you won’t be able to hold it up.

That earned me a snarky text back and then my phone rang and there was an issue with a PowerPoint presentation and I had to go figure that out. I swear, PowerPoint was created by Satan to ruin lives.

I got the problem sorted out and that afternoon I had to put on my nice face and present to some potential new clients. I had my favorite heels on and I was confident in my material, and the best part was that Lucah got to come watch me.

His eyes were locked on me the entire time and it gave me even more confidence. I could have done the entire thing naked and rocked it out. Afterwards they shook my hand and said how impressed they were with someone so young. Dad beamed and told them I was his daughter. Lucah gave me a wink and I couldn’t tell who was more proud, him or Dad. I was floating on post-presentation high and I wanted nothing more than to pull Lucah away and screw him somewhere, but that was completely impossible. Hopefully I could hold out until tonight.

He called me the second I got back into my office.

“I am so fucking proud of you and you are so fucking amazing and I wish I was fucking you right now, and I’ve said fuck too many times but I feel it is warranted in this situation.” He hung up and I did a fist pump and he pretended to clap. Then we had to stop because there were people walking by.

I was beaming the rest of the day. Things were actually going well. Lucah and I were ridiculously in love, all my friends were coming to the ball, we’d potentially just made a multi-million dollar deal and Mrs. Andrews was keeping our secret.

Something had to go wrong soon to balance things out. Not that I was cynical, but it was my experience that when things are perfect, that’s when reality comes and bites you in the ass and reminds you that life isn’t like that. It’s a series of ups and downs and the downs sometimes come when you least expect them.

“What do you think?” Sloane said as she zipped up the side of the dummy dress. We were at her studio because she had better mirrors and she could make alterations on the spot.

I turned slowly in front of the three-way mirror and then stopped. This was not a dress. This was something else entirely.

“You’re not saying anything,” Sloane said, her eyes bugging out from lack of sleep and too much caffeine and anticipation. “You hate it. It’s too much. Will you just say something?!”

“It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, and this is just the mock up. I just . . . I mean, look at it.” The top was a bodice with a sweetheart neck that made my boobs look lush, but not like they were busting out and then the skirt . . . oh, the skirt. The bodice dipped into a V and the skirt started just at my hips and flowed out, but not in a cupcake way. There was an underskirt and so forth to help it stay out, not that it needed any help. This was a Ball Gown.

It was like Sloane had sculpted the dress out of some sort of non-fabric substance. I moved in it, but it didn’t lose its shape, and it wasn’t heavy at all. That might change when we got the real dress done, because the fabric would probably weigh more, but damn.

I felt like Scarlet O’Hara coming down the staircase at Twelve Oaks while Rhett Butler ogled me in front of everyone.

“You are the absolute bestest friend in the entire world, Sloane. I would hug you, but I don’t want to hurt the dress.” Her face finally burst into a smile and she crushed me in her arms before picking me up and whirling me around once.

“It’s just the practice dress, it doesn’t matter. I could make another one in my sleep. I’m so glad you like it. I wanted it to be spectacular.”

“Mission accomplished, Sloane. Really. Lucah is going to lose his mind.” I couldn’t wait to see it.

“Speaking of him, what is he wearing? Black or white?”

“He won’t tell me. Since I won’t tell him about my dress, he refuses to tell me about his tux. I mean, I know he’s gonna look sexy, but I kind of wish I knew what color it was.” I’d been trying to use my feminine wiles to get it out of him, but no amount of blowjobs would get him to tell me. He could keep a secret, but I knew that already.

Sloane helped me out of the dress and I put my work clothes back on. I’d come straight from the office and I was heading home to order food before Lucah came over. Sloane was so busy making ball gowns that she’d spent the last few nights at the studio so Lucah and I could have all the dirty screaming sex we wanted at my apartment. It was lovely.

“Have you told your parents yet that you’re bringing me? She said as she wrestled the dress back on the dress form.

“Uh, not yet. I don’t think Lucah has told them about the two dates thing, either. I mean, it’s going to look a little weird that he’s bringing my friends. We didn’t consider that when we originally made this plan, so breaking the news is going to require some finesse on both our parts. I definitely don’t have it, but maybe I can borrow his. I mean, it’s not like Dad doesn’t know that Lucah and I get along, and maybe I used him as a reason to get my friends to the event and had had to agree because I’m his boss. I think that’s the way I’m going to play it.” I’d thought about this a lot. It seemed that spare moments in my life were spent trying to come up with feasible stories for my interactions with Lucah. It was a better hobby than knitting.

Lucah was late, but he texted me letting me know he had brother drama again. I kept picturing a snotty little kid throwing tantrums, even though I knew his brother was twenty-three. Lucah still hadn’t given me physical descriptors, so I built an image of him in my head that was probably completely wrong.

He finally walked in and he was in a mood that I didn’t think any amount of sex or cuddling or anything else was going to lift, so I took his hand, led him to the couch and made him sit.

“Talk to me. That’s an order, Mr. Blaine.” I thought he was just going to shake his head, but he didn’t.

“I don’t know what to do, Rory. I’m out of ideas. Short of planting drugs on him and calling the cops, I’ve got nothing.” He put his head in his hands.

“All he does is get himself into trouble. It’s a wonder he hasn’t gotten arrested yet. Seriously, it’s a fucking miracle. He always seems to find a way to get out of it. He’s smart, and he knows it. I just wish he’d find something constructive to do with it. He seems bent on destruction right now, but he’s not a kid anymore. He’s an adult and I’m thinking about just telling him that I’m done until he gets his shit together.” I had no idea what to say or do to make it better, so I just sat there and listened.

“I know he’s broken up about Mom and Dad, but he was having problems before that. I don’t think he’s addicted to drugs, but maybe rehab would help? I just don’t know what to do.” He finally lifted his head and I’d never seen him so anguished before. It absolutely broke my heart.

I reached out and pulled him into my arms and held him. That seemed to be the only thing to do, since I didn’t have any magical solutions. I stroked his hair as he breathed and I could tell he was on the verge of tears. It was an intense thing, seeing someone break down like that. It only made me love and ache for him more.

“Are you sure there isn’t anything I can do. I just feel awful.”

“I know. I’m sorry that I’m dumping this on you at all. I didn’t mean to, but I don’t have anyone else to talk to. Tate has pretty much cut ties with him so Ryder burned that bridge already. I don’t blame him, because he has the girls to think about, but it’s just hard sometimes.”

“I know, I know. We can talk about something else if you want.” He sat up and his eyes were red, but dry. “Tell me about your parents,” I asked tentatively. I expected him to shut me down, but he didn’t.

“We were poor. I mean, not that we didn’t have enough food, but there were times when we ate cereal dry for dinner because that was all we had in the house. My dad was a good man, but he had the worst employment luck ever. He’d get a good job and then the company would go bankrupt, or it would burn down, or he’d get laid off when the jobs went overseas. It happened so often that Mom kept an emergency fund for when he was out of work. She had health problems, so she couldn’t really keep down a job. We lost our house a more than once and had to live in a one-bedroom apartment for a few months one summer. But Dad made it like we were having an adventure, so he strung a tarp up in the living room and we got to pretend we were camping.” He smiled at the memory and I was shocked. I had no idea that Lucah had grown up like that.

It made me think about my own upbringing and how lucky I’d been. Not that I ever forgot, but when you heard someone else’s story, it really made you think about your own life.

“The only way out was school, so I did the best I could so I could find a way out. I remember seeing a man in a suit, and he drove a beautiful car and looked like he had the world at his feet, so I made the goal to be a man in a suit. And here I am.”

He smiled and his mood did seem a bit lighter.

“I dressed as my dad for Halloween when I was three. I insisted on using his briefcase, even though it was almost as big as I was and I had to drag it on the ground behind me. It was a really expensive briefcase and when I came home with it full of candy, and all dirty, he just laughed and said it was mine now. I didn’t really have any concept of what he did, but I knew that was what I wanted when I grew up.” When other little girls had been obsessed with their astronaut and princess Barbies, Dad had gotten me one that was probably supposed to be a secretary. Instead, he told me she was CEO Barbie and he somehow found a doll-sized desk for her, and I made her hold meetings with all my other dolls and stuffed animals.

Yes, I was an only child and didn’t have a lot of friends.

We talked more about our childhoods, and even though they’d been so different, there were so many things we had in common. Childhood was pretty similar no matter how you grew up, I guessed.

I was hungry and ready to order food, and Lucah seemed better.

“Thank you, Sunshine. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Same here.” We smiled like idiots at each other and I realized something else. Yes, I loved him, but not just in a romantic way. He’d become one of my best friends. Even if we never had sex again, I would miss his presence in my life if he were gone. I couldn’t get rid of him now, even if I wanted to.

“You’re my favorite,” I said as he pulled me to my feet and then into his arms.

“You’re my favoritest of favorite things,” he said.