Sweetie's Diamonds (11 page)

She heard him sigh.
 
“Diane, did you call just to lay a guilt trip on me?”

“No.
 
Have you been saying anything to David?
 
I mean, about the divorce, or anything?”

“I don't know what you mean.”

“Well, he's acting pretty strangely.
 
He didn't eat his spaghetti tonight and you know how much he likes spaghetti.”

“Jesus, Diane, maybe he's just not hungry.”

“That's what he said.
 
But he
always
eats his spaghetti.”

“Well, did you ask him about it?”

“Yes.
 
He said he wasn't hungry.”

“Well, there you have it.
 
He wasn't hungry.”

“I think he's depressed about the move.
 
And about the divorce.”
 

“Well, that makes two of us,” Greg said.
 
“Or does that make three of us?”

“Hey, it wasn't my idea,” she said.

“I'm hanging up, Diane.”

“Wait.
 
I didn't mean to start a fight.”

“It seems like that's the only thing that happens when we talk.
 
You
called
me
, remember?”

She shook her head in frustration.
 
It was impossible to talk to the man.
 

“Look, I just wanted to know if you had been saying anything negative to him.
 
You have in the past, you know.”

Greg cursed under his breath.
 
“Diane, you're too much.
 
I'll talk to you later.
 
Tell David hello for me.
 
Good night.”

“Yeah, okay, run away.”

“You know it's not like that.
 
I didn't pick up the phone to have a fight.”

“Fine.
 
Goodbye.”

“Goodbye.”

She waited for him to hang up first.
 
When he did, she slammed down the phone.
 

“Bastard,” she muttered.

She reached for her wine and sipped it, sitting and staring at the blank television.
 
She lost herself in the dark screen, unaware that David was peeking around the corner of the hallway and watching her.

M
om did her spacing out trick again tonight.
 
She had another fight with Dad on the phone and now she's sitting with her wine and staring at the TV.
 
It isn't on.

I think I understand now what her big dark secret is.
 

Today Billy and I watched one of his dad's porno tapes that he found in his crawl space.
 
I couldn't believe it.
 
I've seen porno before, but this one shocked me more than what I've seen in the past.
 
You know why?
 
I swear the girl in the movie was my Mom.
 

I can't believe it and I don't want to believe it.
 
But if it's true, then I guess that's it.
 
That's the big secret.
 
My Mom was a porno star.
 
I wonder which one she was?
 
I saw the names in the credits but I didn't know which one was my Mom.
 
This requires some more research.
 

I wonder if Dad knew about this.
 
Probably not.
 
Unless that's why they got divorced.
 
But probably not.
 
I'll bet I'm the first one who's discovered the big secret.
 

There are also these strange newspaper clippings that she has in a box we found when we were moving.
 
The box is still in the kitchen.
 
There's another box on top so I bet she just forgot about them.
 
She said she was going to get rid of them but she hasn't yet.
 
Sometimes she gets that way.
 
Sometimes Mom forgets to do something, like she's absent-minded or something.
 
Sometimes I don't know how she teaches the classes she does at school, because at home she can be pretty flaky.
 

What would my friends do if they all find out my Mom was once a porn star?
 
I sure hope Billy doesn't say anything.
 
I'll have to tell him tomorrow at school to keep quiet about it.
 
It might hurt her job at school.
 

Actually, I hate to say this, but it's kind of cool, in a way.
 
“My Mom, the Porn Star.”
 
How many other kids can say that?
 
How many other kids can look at their Moms and say, “Hey, I've seen her doing the nasty on film.”
 

Probably not many.

I
t was past Billy Davis' bedtime.
 
Nevertheless, he was anxious to watch another videotape from his father's stash.
 
Earlier he had replaced the one he had watched with David and taken a different cassette from the box in the crawl space.
 
Even though he was not yet a teenager, his body had begun to respond to erotic stimuli and this made the anticipation even more compelling.
 
He understood, in theory, what was happening to him, and he enjoyed testing the boundaries of his newly discovered adolescence.
 

He waited in his room until he thought his father had gone to bed.
 
The television in his dad's bedroom was broadcasting the ten o'clock news.
 
It was a nightly ritual for his dad to watch the news until ten-thirty and then turn off the light.
 
As a teacher at the high school, his dad had to be out of the house before Billy.

Billy figured it was safe.
 
Surely his dad wouldn't hear the TV in the living room if the volume was low.
 
Billy got out of bed and carefully opened his bedroom door.
 
The hallway was dark.
 
He peeked out and saw the sliver of light underneath the closed door of his father's bedroom.
 
Billy silently stepped into the hall and moved quickly around the corner.
 
Once he was in the living room, he stopped and listened.
 
The illuminated clock on the mantle read “10:30” but he could still faintly hear his father's television.
 
He held his breath and waited until finally he heard the sound of a toilet flushing and then the news snapped off.
 

Billy crept to the television and turned it on with the remote.
 
He rammed his thumb down on the volume control so that the sound wouldn't blare out when the picture appeared.
 
When it did, the room was bathed in a silver flicker that cast Billy's shadow over the walls and ceiling behind him.
 

He turned on the VCR and pushed the cassette into the slot.
 
A few seconds later, the television picture changed to the tape's leader.
 
Billy inched up the volume so that he could hear just a little of the soundtrack.
 

The main credits began.
 
This one was called
Babysitter Brothel
and had virtually the same cast as the other one.
 
Billy watched with anticipation as the credits ended and the movie began.
 
The story opened on a large country mansion where a rich couple was preparing to go out for the evening.
 
The man wonders where the babysitter is.
 
The wife replies that she is on the way.
 

The bell rings and the man opens the door to reveal the same actress that Billy and David saw in the first film—David's mother.
 
This time she is dressed in a schoolgirl's uniform—plaid skirt, knee socks, white blouse, and her hair is done in pigtails.
 
The man's expression indicates that he is extremely pleased with the babysitter's appearance.
 

The couple introduces the babysitter to their child, a young boy, and then goes out.
 
The man, however, rubs his hand on the babysitter's bottom before leaving.
 
Instead of being offended, the babysitter winks at him and registers that his advances are welcome.

The scene shifts in time.
 
The babysitter has put the child to bed and is now alone in the huge living room, in front of a fireplace.
 
Once again, she starts the action by focusing on giving herself pleasure.
 

“What the hell are you doing?”

Billy jumped and almost screamed.
 
He quickly punched the remote and turned off the tape.
 
The picture on the television switched to
The Tonight Show
.
 

Billy stammered, “Uh, I couldn't, uhm, sleep, so I thought I'd watch television.”

“What the hell were you watching?” his father asked.
 
He stood in the archway between the living room and the hallway, dressed in boxer shorts and an undershirt.
 

“Nothing.
 
Some movie on cable.”

“The hell it was.
 
Give me the remote.”

Billy was busted.
 
There was no way out of it.
 
He meekly handed the remote to his father.
 
Peter Davis aimed it at the television and pressed “play.”
 

Babysitter Brothel
reappeared on the screen.
 
Davis watched for a few seconds, taking in exactly what it was his son had been watching.
 
Then he switched it off.

“Where did you get this?”

Billy stared at the floor, ashamed and humiliated.
 

“Answer me!”

“David found it,” Billy lied.

“David?
 
David Boston?”

Billy nodded.

“Where did he find it?”

“I don't know.
 
It's his mother's.”

Peter Davis blinked.
 
“His mother's?”

Billy nodded again.
 
He prayed that his father wouldn't recognize it as being one of his.

Davis almost laughed but didn't.
 
“What makes you think it's his mother's?”

Billy shrugged.
 
“David said he found a box of tapes when they were moving to their new apartment.”

His father moved to the VCR and ejected the cassette.
 
He examined it and then took a look at the box it came in.
 
Billy closed his eyes and waited for the yelling, or perhaps the blows that would come.
 

Peter Davis wasn't sure what he should do with this information.
 
The tape looked like one from his old collection.
 
He hadn't watched them in years.
 

“Well I guess I'm going to have to talk to David's mother about this,” he said.
 
“You know you're not supposed to be looking at this stuff.”

“I know.”
 

“We'll talk about it tomorrow.
 
Now you better get to bed.
 
You've got school in the morning.”

Billy didn't move.
 

“Go on,” his father prompted.

“Dad?”

“What.”

“I don't think it would be a good idea to bring it up with David's mom.”

“Why not?”