Take Me As I Am (21 page)

Chapter Twenty-three

“She’s my grandmother, not an ogre.”

“Yeah, but she can be ogre like, if she doesn’t approve of what she sees or hears.”

“Remind you of anyone?”

Thea glanced at the woman by her side. Except for the fact that she tired easily in the evening, no one would know she’d been seriously ill. The doctors in Antwerp had discharged her to a doctor near her parent’s home where she was living while convalescing. She was looking good.

“Yeah, both stubborn as mules.”

“How can you say that?” Joanna asked in mock seriousness.

“Easy. I lived with you, remember?”

“Yeah, I remember,” Joanna replied softly.

Thea negotiated the next bend before responding to the wistful note in the last comment. “When does Jack want you back?”

Jo looked at the houses that lined the suburban area.

“He has a television show lined up for next week and a couple of concerts in Nashville before I go back to Europe and finish the tour.”

Thea screeched to a halt and turned to Joanna in astonishment. “You have all this already planned?”

“Well, yeah. I made commitments and gotta make good on them.”

“You’ve been sick. How can they expect you to go back to such a heavy schedule?”

“Gran’s place is next block.”

“I know where your grandmother lives.”

“Good.” Jo smirked.

“You never answered me.” Thea could feel her cheeks heat up, indicating her mounting anger.

“I’m not good at being my own manager.”

“What do you mean? Lee told me that you would get the best.”

“I knew he was instrumental in your leaving, Thea. He as much admitted it to me,” Joanna growled. “I told him I already had the best.”

“What? What do you mean by that? I was your manager.” The driveway for Joanna’s grandmother was in sight and Thea maneuvered toward it.

“Yeah, and your point would be?”

“You told him you had the best. I was a raw recruit. He told me so.”

“His opinion never mattered to me, Thea. You were my manager. I didn’t want anyone else. You only had my best interests at heart. I call that the best.”

“I did. I would. Always.”

“Love you, too, Thea.” Joanna turned and winked. “Come on, Gran will be waiting.”

Thea was flabbergasted as she watched her friend leave the vehicle. Had Joanna really said those special words? Or was it a flippant retort?

†

“She was wicked.”

“Yep, and now you know where I get it from,” Joanna said.

They were driving toward home after spending what turned out to be a rather enjoyable dinner with Joanna’s grandmother.

“I do. I do. Wow, I never would have expected it.”

“You doubt my American roots?”

“No. No, of course not. She’s lovely, isn’t she? It’s a pity she doesn’t get on with your dad.”

“Yeah, but I don’t stress myself about it. It is life, after all, and not everything can have the sugary happy ending. Can it?”

“Guess not.”

As Thea drove, the rain pattered on the windshield and she concentrated on the road listening as Jo hummed a tune.

“Sing for me, please, Joanna.”

“Sorry, I didn’t realize I was humming.” Jo smiled self-consciously. “You always make me feel relaxed and content with my lot in life. I’m glad we’ve had this time together to smooth the cracks in our relationship.”

During the weeks of her recuperation, she’d hoped Thea might consider going back to Nashville with her when she went back. The scene was set for Thea to leave without causing a problem at the hotel. Karen had taken on another permanent member of staff to cover for Thea during the long periods of Jo’s convalescence. All she had to do was convince Thea that it was the right choice, although she had a good idea that her friend wouldn’t object. They hadn’t discussed Thea’s profession of love at the hospital because it had never seemed the time or place. Perhaps it was time they did.

For the moment, she was happy to sing, if that’s what her best friend asked for… “Days are uncertain we don’t know what to expect…
How I love you each day. Come rain or shine
,
please be mine
,
”
she finished the song.

“That was beautiful, Joanna. Thank you. I haven’t heard that one before.”

“Just another ditty I wrote recently.” She took Thea’s hand. “I was thinking there’s a club on the east side of town. Wanna go?”

“Are you sure you are well enough?”

“Sure, I am. Pop’s not expecting me until midnight at least and it’s only nine-thirty.”

“Okay. I’ve never been to any club in town before. Where is it?”

†

Thea had heard about lesbian clubs but she had never been to one, Danvers wasn’t exactly broadminded enough to have any club, never mind a lesbian one. Yet here she was with Joanna and it was both exciting and nerve wracking.

“How do you know about this place?”

“Thea, you forget I was brought up here.”

“Joanna, this is a lesbian club.”

“Yes, it is. Any objections?”

“No. No, of course not.”

Joanna winked at her before holding out her hand. Thea took it shyly as they moved toward the bar.

“What do you want to drink?”

“I’ll have a club soda. I’m driving, remember.”

“We could get a cab later if you want a drink.”

“Joanna, please don’t forget you’ve been ill.”

“How could I? You keep reminding me,” Joanna muttered good-naturedly. “A scotch and a club soda,” she told the bartender.

“What does that mean exactly?” Thea frowned, very conscious of the larger hand still holding hers.

Thea looked around and was amazed at the number of women in one room. It was a smorgasbord for the naïve and not so naïve lesbian. It was crowded with women laughing together, others stood watching the dancers, and there were some couples so close you couldn’t make out where one woman ended and another began. Here she was with the woman of her dreams, in a place she never in her imagination expected to be, feeling inadequately prepared to deal with the challenge.

“There’s a table in that corner.” Thea motioned toward a tiny alcove away from the dance floor.

†

Jo’s eyes surveyed the area with a sardonic expression.

It was a
typical unobtrusive position for Thea.
“You couldn’t have found us a place any more discreet, I see.”

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing. Let’s sit and have our drinks.”

After settling into the tiny booth, they both looked at the drinks in front of them rather than at one another.

“Where did Lackerly come from? I haven’t heard anyone in your family with that last name.”

Jo grinned. “I needed a stage name so I flipped opened the phone book, closed my eyes, and put my finger on a name. Lackerly is what came up.”

Thea laughed. “What would you have done if it had been something like Butt?”

“Jo Butt, I like the sound of that.” Jo’s face turned serious. “Thea,” she began.

“Jo Xianthos, or should I say, Jo Lackerly. Wow, what a coup in my club.” A willowy woman with brown, wavy hair and a wonderful tan stood next to the table.

“You haven’t changed, Liz. I see the place is still thriving.”

“Why, of course, Jo, and why shouldn’t it? Did you think it would nosedive once you stopped performing here?” Liz asked arrogantly.

“Nope, never considered it. I haven’t your ego, Liz.”

“I see you can still pick them. She’s good looking but a little old, don’t you think?”

Jo stood to confront the woman. Before she managed to say anything, Thea was suddenly between them.

“Joanna simply has taste,” Thea said twinning her fingers with Joanna’s fingers.

Jo smiled as she gently squeezed Thea’s hand.

“I didn’t know you needed anyone to speak for you. Then again, now you’re some big shot, aren’t you? Do they know about you and your association here, Jo? I think your country fans might be surprised. Even might cause a few raised eyebrows if they knew what I do.”

“Are you threatening me?” Jo squared her shoulders. If Liz wanted a cat fight she was up for it. Just.

“Hardly think so. Liz, isn’t it. Well, Liz, Joanna doesn’t need to pretend anymore, she’s earned her freedom in whatever she wants to do. Isn’t that right, Joanna?” Thea turned her gaze to Jo.

“That’s right.” Jo nodded.

†

Joanna’s slow seductive voice captured Thea and she lost herself completely in the smoldering eyes.

“Oh, I give up with you, Jo.” Liz stalked off in a huff, half dragging the young woman who clutched her arm along with her.

Thea was lost in Joanna’s hypnotic gaze as they both returned to their seats in the booth. Slowly, she cleared her throat and smiled. “She wasn’t happy with you.”

“Nope, she wasn’t. Never has been since we were five and I accidentally pushed her off the swing in the park and she scraped her knees. Never has forgiven me.”

“Five?” Seeing something from Joanna’s childhood was a new facet for Thea. During the weeks of her convalescence, Joanna’s parents had regaled her with various anecdotes of the singer’s childhood, but this was different.

“Yep, Liz and I grew up in the same neighborhood. You might know her folks, Jim and Ellen Clancy. They own the grocery store. Or at least they did, last I recall.”

Thea knew the name of the grocery store was Clancy’s but a young couple worked there. “It’s still called that but a young couple, Frank and Lisa, run it now.”

“Frank? Really? He was so dumb in school.”

“Joanna, that’s not nice.”

“Frank is the youngest son of the Clancy’s kids. Dave probably went onto bigger and better things and as you can see…the only daughter wound up here.” Joanna winked, slugged back her drink, and waved for another.

“Speaking of which, do I take it you used to perform here?”

“That can be taken in several ways you know,” Joanna said laughing.

Thea flushed.

Joanna grinned and picked up Thea’s hand.

Thea’s blood sizzled at the contact. Maybe her wish wasn’t so crazy after all. Joanna had been hugging her more since they came home and tonight there was all the handholding.

Besides, hadn’t Liz said something about…?

“The band I was with was close to breaking up and I’d decided to try it on my own. Liz was opening this place and it was a good venue. The ladies appeared to enjoy the performances and I got paid along with fringe benefits.”

“Fringe benefits?”
Now this really is getting interesting.

“Plenty of ways to get hold of drugs and the company of the ladies wasn’t bad either.”

“Joanna.”

“Come on, Thea, I was only messing with you. Look at my track record. It speaks for itself, doesn’t it?”

Thea saw the glimmer of amusement in the blue eyes and she smiled. “Messing with me, huh? Well, it’s time you settled down with someone you love. That’s all I can say, regardless of gender, if they make you happy.”

“You make me happy. Should I settle down with you?”

My God, this isn’t happening. I’m in a dream. It has to be a dream.

Thea’s heartbeat thumped rapidly in her chest as she stared wide-eyed at her friend.

“Drink your drink, Joanna. I need to go home soon, I have to work tomorrow.”

†

Jo chuckled at the affronted and flustered expression on Thea’s face. She downed the recently delivered drink and stood unsteadily.

Thea was right. I wasn’t up to this yet and damn, I so wanted to explore this new relationship with her tonight.

Several women crowded around them, staring at her in disbelief.

“Jo Lackerly. It’s Jo Lackerly!” The scream went up from several women and then before she knew it, a mass of bodies had surrounded them.

Thea watched wide-eyed at the crowd.

The screams increased and the number of women converging on the spot multiplied. Jo watched Thea using her smaller frame to sidle her way from around the table and across the huge line, managing to get next to her.

“Need any help?” Thea grabbed her hand.

Jo had never needed help more than she did at that moment. The next words that passed Thea’s lips astounded her.

“Hey, ladies, she’s mine. If you want her autograph, see the owner and maybe she might get Jo to perform one evening, if you let her alone, now.”

A rousing cheer went up as the crowd turned toward Liz. A few remained but soon disappeared as Thea glared at them. Grasping Jo’s hand tighter, she led her toward the exit.