Tangled Hearts (11 page)

She also knew life was unfair. She'd lost her parents when she was a little girl. She’d missed many things young girls shared with their mothers. And just loving a man didn’t mean he’d love in return. Sighing softly, she felt the tears again, but this time they were for what might have been and was not.

“I’m probably crushing you,” she whispered, tightening her arms around his neck and bringing her face up to meet his gaze. His lips were mere inches away. She felt his breath fan her cheeks, felt the heat radiating from his body.

“No.”

Her smile wobbled. When he cupped her face with his hands and brushed the teardrops from her spiky lashes, her heart melted. He looked worried about her.

“I’ll keep you safe, Brie. I won’t let him hurt you.”

“I’m all right. It’s just—I know. I won’t worry anymore.”

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe you should start worrying—about me.” With that, Jake brought his mouth down on hers in a mind-blowing kiss.

Had this really been what she sought? Not comfort, but bliss? When she was in his arms, she didn’t worry or think about the future or regret the past. She only felt. Felt the wonder of his touch, the magic of his embrace, the shimmering sensations that sizzled through her.

The world spun dizzyingly as he laid her down on the sofa and pressed her into the cushions. Endless moments of spiraling delight whirled around and around as their kiss went on and on. Breathing was forgotten. The blood rushed through her veins, heating every cell, pounding in her ears. Time ceased. Earthly cares hung suspended as they were lost in a world of their own making, one of wonder and passion and love.

When Jake pulled back at last, it was too soon. Brianna gave a small moan of protest, and he kissed her again, then sat up.

“We’re moving beyond comfort. Come on, let’s take that walk.” He rose and went to the window. “It’s stopped snowing. It’s still overcast, but we won’t get wet walking.”

Brianna stared at his back in startled surprise. What happened? One moment he was kissing her like there was no tomorrow, the next calmly suggesting they take a walk!

Feeling totally confused, she sat up and pulled back her hair. There was something wrong when she couldn’t keep his attention in the throes of passion. Sighing, she rose on shaky legs and headed for the bedroom.

“I’ll be out in a minute,” she said as she closed the door behind her. Leaning against it for a long moment, she closed her eyes, reliving the kiss. The kiss of a lifetime—and he wanted to go for a walk in the snow. She shook her head and pushed away from the door. She brushed her hair and quickly braided it to keep it from blowing.

Her eyes sparkled back at her in the mirror, her cheeks were bright with color and her lips were rosy. She turned away, her heart heavy.

Jake stood by the door already wearing his shearling jacket. Brianna quickly donned her own jacket and pulled on a knit cap and woolen mittens.

“I’m ready,” she said brightly. She'd go home tomorrow, no matter what.

Stepping out onto the porch, Brianna caught her breath. The air was so cold it almost snapped. Snow blanketed everything, from the tree limbs bent beneath the weight, to the distinctive shape of Jake’s car. Smiling in delight at the pristine setting, she boldly stamped down the stairs, making the first marks in the white expanse.

“This is great! We’re the first to walk in it.”

“Yeah, want to help shovel?” He stood on the porch, watching her, then scanning the area from habit.

“No. And you’re not shoveling anything now, either. Come on, you said walk, let’s walk.”

Bravely Brianna set off, hoping she didn’t wind up in some drift. The snow covered her ankles, puffing away from each step as she forged into virgin territory. Two seconds later, Jake joined her, his longer stride eating up the distance.

“Doesn’t this remind you of being a kid? We couldn’t wait to be finished with chores when it snowed so we could play,” she reminisced happily. Tilting her head back to look up at him, she waited for his memories. Were they as happy as hers?

He shook his head. “You forget, I’m from Denver. We didn’t have expanses of open land like this. I lived in apartments that had parking lots plowed as soon as the first flake fell.”

Brianna exhaled, watching the cloud hang suspended in front of her before it gradually dissipated. She eyed the trees ahead of them, then smiled. “So you didn’t partake in snowball fights?” she asked innocently.

“Sure, just not often. There weren’t a lot of kids around where I lived. Why, you want to fight?”

She shook her head. “Not really. We could make a snowman.”

“What about snow angels? I want to see an award-winning angel.”

Without any warning, she turned and fell back into the soft snow. Slowly she raised her arms up and down, packing the snow beneath her. She opened and closed her legs.

“For a perfect snow angel, I need help to get up. Otherwise I’ll mess up the outline,” she said, carefully drawing her arms away from the snow and holding out her hands. “Don’t step on my skirt!” she warned.

Jake laughed as he reached over and clasped her hands, pulling her upright. Together they studied the outline in the snow.

“Perfect or what?” she asked triumphantly, her heart racing with exhilaration.

She enjoyed seeing him laugh. Could she get him to do it again?

“Perfect.” Only his eyes were on her, not the outline in the snow.

Brianna was mesmerized by the lights in his dark gaze. “It’s all in the technique. And not getting up by yourself. My brothers were too impatient to wait for anyone to help them up. So their angels…”

She didn’t care what her brothers had done; neither did Jake. She wanted him to kiss her again. Like he had on the sofa. More than comfort, much more.

She almost cried out in protest when he stepped away and continued walking. “I’ll remember. It’s the technique.”

“Like building a snowman,” she said, hurrying to catch up.

“That’s got a technique to it, as well?” he asked.

“Sure. Josh always wanted to build the biggest one in the world. So we’d roll the bottom forever, until it was huge. Then the next ball would get too big for us to lift. You have to practice some moderation.”

“That was when you were kids. How big do you think we could make one now?”

“Oh, no, not another I-want-to-build-the-biggest-snowman-in-the-world person,” she wailed.

“We can at least make one bigger than your brother ever did.”

Giving in to the fun, Brianna kept up a running commentary as they rolled the balls to make the snowman. She told Jake about escapades as a child. How her mother worked hard to keep the three children occupied during the long winter days. Chores, activities, quiet time, all came bubbling out in happy reminiscences.

Jake listened, fascinated. He had little to offer in return, but it didn’t seem to matter. Brianna had enough stories to keep them entertained all day and night if she chose to keep going.

When it came time to lift the second ball, they worked together, staggering beneath its weight, carefully setting it on the base, packing snow around it to keep it from rolling off. Then the head. Jake lifted it by himself.

“We need a picture,” Brianna said when they put the finishing touches on the face. The snowman was as tall as she was. “Josh will never believe this without a picture. Do you bring your phone?”

“Of course. Stand beside him and we'll have something to compare it to.”

He snapped several photographs, capturing the delight in her expression, the rosy cheeks, the radiant blue of her eyes. He'd give her some, but one or two he wouldn't share. They'd be for him alone.

“This will show Josh,” she said with glee, looking at the pictures a minute later. “He has a tendency to believe he knows everything, from what’s best for me to how Jase should expand the ranch. Let him deny this!” She gave a fist pump, her eyes dancing. “This is the greatest snowman ever.”

Jake was curiously silent. His gaze firmly on the snowman, he only nodded absently to Brianna’s comments, lost in thought.

“Earth to Jake.” She shook his arm.

“What?”

“Where were you?”

“Just thinking. Ready to head back?”

“Almost. Let’s walk just a little farther.”

He missed the gleam in her eye. She kept her face turned a bit lest he guess her plans. Gleeful anticipation rose. She felt like a kid again, carefree and happy.

They walked beyond their prized snowman, the walking growing more difficult as the snow grew deeper. Soon they were into the trees that lined the open space around Jake’s cabin. Brianna paused, leaning over to scrape snow off her boot. Jake continued walking slowly so she could catch up.

Grabbing a handful of snow, Brianna packed it, then tossed it up and caught it. Tossed again, caught it.

Jake turned, eyeing the snowball suspiciously. “We’re not having a snowball fight,” he stated.

“Stuffy,” she replied.

“You’d lose big time, sweetheart.”

Warily he watched the ball as she tossed it up and caught it again.

“Wanna bet?” she asked softly, stepping closer. Jake took a step back. Brianna advanced another foot. He moved back an equal distance.

Grinning in triumph, she let it fly. The snowball hit the heavily laden branch above him and a cloud of snow rained down on Jake, covering him from head to foot.

Laughing aloud, Brianna turned and ran for her life. She’d done this so many times with Jase and Josh she knew the routine. If she could only make the cabin, she’d be—

He tackled her from behind, forcing her face down in the snow. She was laughing too hard to resist. Turning her face to breathe, she couldn’t control the giggles. He’d looked stunned as the snow began to slide off the branch.

Rolling her onto her back, he snatched off her hat and grabbed a handful of snow, packing it in around her neck.

“Nooo! That’s cold. Stop! Stop!” she shrieked. She tried to escape, but he lay across her legs and held her firmly.

“Damn straight it’s cold. Just like the snow down my neck.” He reached for another handful of snow but she batted it away, showering them both with the icy powder.

“Okay, I give up. I’m sorry.” Her giggles belied the sincerity of her apology.

“Not good enough.” He scooped up another handful, threatening.

Brianna knocked it away and reached up to pull him down. Her lips were cold, his cheek colder. She kissed him gently. “I’ll gladly grovel, but before the fire, please?”

He captured her cheeks in his cold hands and gazed down at her, his eyes dark and mysterious. She looked lovely. Her face was bright with color, her eyes sparkling, her lips curved in the most delectable smile.

“You’re driving me crazy, do you know that?”

“I’m just trying to have some fun,” she said, her smile warm and loving.

Jake rested his forehead against hers, closing his eyes as they lay on the cold ground. Taking a deep breath, he stood, then reached down to pull her upright.

“Cold?” he asked, watching her as she tried to get the snow out of her neckline.

“Just where I’m covered in snow.”

She couldn’t keep from laughing, though. This had been the most fun she’d had in years.

“Me, too. Let’s head back. This time, you stay right with me the whole way.”

“As close as you’ll let me,” she murmured, falling into step as he turned toward home.

Jake was careful to keep a couple of feet between them. She didn’t know why, but suspected it was to keep his hands to himself. She wished he’d reach out to her. She’d take her mittens off in a second if he’d show any sign of wanting to hold her hand. Instead, he seemed more aloof, more distant than ever. As if they were really the strangers they had become over the past two years. As if the time they’d spent together these past few days meant nothing. Was she only a case to be solved? Was it only some sense of duty that kept him near?

Jake built up the fire, told Brianna to change into dry clothes, then left to work on the snowmobile. Brianna watched him walk away, a feeling of déjà vu sweeping over her. He’d walked away before, and she hadn’t known then that it was goodbye. He was pulling away from her again. They’d enjoyed the afternoon until she’d clearly shown she wanted another kiss. If he’d slammed a door in her face, he couldn’t have been any clearer.

“So what is the big deal? You’ve kissed me before,” she said to the empty room. Getting no answer, she headed for the bedroom to change into dry clothes.

Dinner proved to be a strained affair. Neither spoke except to request food to be passed. When Jake said he’d do the dishes, Brianna acquiesced with speed, taking it as a certain indication he didn’t want her around.

“I need to get back tomorrow,” she said as she carried her plate to the sink.

“No need, you can stay here—”

“It’s not a question of my staying here. I have a life to get back to. I appreciate your having me this weekend. And I hope there’s been enough time to catch whoever is doing the break-ins. But I have things I need to do. I do have a life apart from being the victim of a crime, you know.”

“Hot date to get back to?” he asked sardonically.

“Maybe,” she returned, anxious to end this. She longed for her own place.

“Thought you weren’t involved with anyone right now.” His eyes focused on her as if he could see inside her soul.

She turned and stared him straight in the eye. “That’s really not your concern anymore, is it? We dated a couple of years ago, then stopped. Since then, my life, private and public, is my own. It has nothing to do with you.”

He clenched his jaw at her attack, his features still. Only the glittering heat in his eyes gave away his strong feelings.

“You’re correct. Your life is no concern of mine. I’ll drive you back in the morning. I don’t want to chance the roads tonight.”

“Tomorrow is fine. Thank you.” Head held high, she walked into the bedroom and closed the door with exaggerated care. Methodically she prepared for bed, her mind spinning. She had wanted him to say something, anything, to indicate he cared about her. Nothing. She meant nothing. It was past time for her to get on with her life. And Jake would not be a part of it.