Tell Me What Is Priceless (Siren Publishing Classic) (26 page)

“Of course,” said Zar. “It will be good for you to get to know some of the employees if you are going to work at my side. Do you have anything to wear? Don’t forget, you will be representing Russ Enterprises.”

“No, what do I need? I will go get something.”

“Dress to impress,” Zar said, taking his credit card off the top of the fridge. “Sign my name.”

Kale smiled. “I used to do that so well. You’re giving me open end on your card? Aren’t you afraid I will take off into the wild blue with it?”

“I would have to kill you for that,” Zar said with a half-serious smile. “Try Bridal Trousseau in Branford. They have some nice clothing.”

“I’ll do that, and I will be back for lunch. Thank you, Zar.”

“You’re welcome, bro.”

Kale grabbed his coat and headed out the door.

Blaze asked, “Was that wise? He is depressed, and you just gave him a card with no limits on it.”

“Time will tell. So what are we doing today? What do we need to do to get ready for Christmas?”

“Nothing that I know of. I have a ham in the fridge and all the fixings. All the presents are bought and wrapped. Maybe I should put Jenny’s and Clair’s aside?”

“Probably a good idea.” Zar wiggled his eyebrows playfully. “Are there packages for me?”

“Of course not,” she replied with a sassy grin. Zar frowned and she admitted, “I’m just not putting yours under the tree.”

“Are you afraid that I will unwrap them?”

“Yes. Are mine under the tree?”

“Who says I got you anything? I buy you presents all the time.”

“I know. But this is Christmas.”

“You’re right, it is. It’s a religious holiday, and I am not religious.”

“I’m not either, but I still celebrate the event. Oh, never mind,” she said, getting up to clear the dishes.

Zar grunted with the effort of getting to his feet and put his arms around her. “I’m picking on you. Of course I got you presents. Since when are you so touchy about material gifts?”

“I’m not touchy. I don’t care what you got me. It is the idea that you went shopping and thought to get me something. David was not really thoughtful on occasion. I even went as far as specifying what I wanted and still didn’t get it because he couldn’t be bother to go out of his way to go look for something. I always made a point to get him thoughtful gifts, and he didn’t think enough of me to do the same. I also overreacted to your words, and I’m sorry.”

“What do you want for Christmas?”

“I don’t know. Offhand, I can’t think of anything that I don’t already have. The point is not the gift, but that you took the time to get me something special. David usually gave me nice gifts, but it was obvious that not much thought went into them. For the last five years, he gave me the same gift certificate to the same store even though I told him that I really didn’t like their products. It’s a touchy subject with me, and I shouldn’t be dumping my hang-ups on you.”

“Did you put thought into my gifts?”

“Yes, I did. I bought the first one three weeks ago. It was something I thought you would like.”

“Really? What is it?”

“I can’t tell you that,” she said with a chuckle. “Are you all right? You look really pale.”

“I hurt. Nothing more or less. Can we go back to bed?”

“Can I finish the dishes?”

“Yeah. Can I meet you in bed?”

“Yeah. I will be in.”

Zar kissed her and limped painfully into the bedroom. When Blaze went in to give him a cup of coffee, he was injecting the last shot into his hip. “That’s it, huh?”

“Yeah, this is it.”

“You have an appointment on December twenty-eighth. They had a cancellation.”

Zar glared at her in irritation. “One week from now? I thought you said it would take a few months.”

“What is the difference?”

“Sit down, Blaze. I have something I need to tell you.”

Blaze walked around the bed and crawled up beside him. She crossed her legs, looking at the regretful expression on his face. “What?”

Zar held his hand out for her to take and leaned his head back. “The compound in the shots is called Xzarant. It was a trial drug that they mixed with painkillers and offered to a select group of test patients. I was not supposed to be one of them. The group was limited to people dying of terminal bone cancer. The terms of their pain relief was that they would donate their bodies to science for study. I didn’t know that when Jake offered me the drug. I had been using it for two years before he told me the truth. By then, almost all of the test patients had died. The study of their bodies found that although Xzarant worked while they were alive, it did massive damage to their already weakened bones. They found that the drug accumulated in the bone marrow and caused the bone shaft to deteriorate. Jake said that because my bones were young and healthy I would probably be all right for twenty or twenty-five years. I was willing to take that chance to be pain free. It is also why I don’t take the shots unless I have to. I found out after Jake’s death that he hadn’t been getting the shots from a pharmaceutical supplier. He had them stored in his private vault because the drug had been banned. When I did some checking, I found out that I couldn’t get anymore. I funded a grant to try and find other drugs that would have the same effects. So far, they have gotten nowhere. I am afraid of what your doctor is going to find.”

Blaze stared at him in disbelief. “So you have been injecting something into yourself for five years that you knew was doing further damage? Why?”

“You of all people shouldn’t ask me that. Would David have taken the shot?”

“Yeah, I suppose that he would have. We can’t run away from this. More than ever, I want to know what can or can’t be done for you. I want to know what damage there is and what can be repaired. I don’t want to wonder when you are going to collapse.”

Zar nodded slowly. “Okay. I will go see him and hope for the best. As I said, Jake told me I had a long time before I had to worry about the drug breaking down my body. The pain is normal for this time of year. I don’t feel weaker or anything, I am just in pain.”

“I hope you are right. I just want to know what we are up against.”

“That’s what I like about you, Blaze. When it comes to reality, you want it real. I’m not so eager to know the truth. I will do it because you ask. If you are going to be with me forever, you need to know what your future holds.”

“I’m not going anywhere if the news is bad. We will deal with it.”

“Like you dealt with David? In solitude and resentment?”

“That’s not fair. David was different, and you know it. I loved him when we first got married, but by the time he got sick, that was gone. As I told you, I considered getting a divorce long before the accident. I just never did it. I knew what could happen when I agreed to marry you. I love you, and I am not going to walk away because we have problems. You are very different than David. I want to be with you, in whatever ways we can be together.”

“Noble words, Blaze. Lie down with me, and keep me warm. I am suddenly very tired.”

Kale stopped by later to drop off the card and show them what he had bought. They put a movie on and watched it as they sliced open some chestnuts. Blaze put them on to cook and then returned to Zar’s side.

Kale smiled. “You two look so cute. How is your hip, Zar?”

“Sore. It will be better in the morning. How are you doing?”

“I’m all right. I’m gonna finish watching the movie and eat some nuts, and then I should get home. I am hoping that Jenny called, but I am not holding my breath.”

“I hope she called, too,” Zar replied, his eyes wandering back to the movie.

When the nuts were done, Blaze made some hot chocolate. She put the chestnuts in a big bowl and brought everything into the living room with a trashcan for the shells. It became a holiday feast as they watched the second half of the movie.

Kale left as soon as the DVD ended, and Blaze closed up the house for the night. As they went about getting ready for bed, she noted that Zar’s limp had lessened to almost unnoticeable. She was worried about him, and after he was breathing in sleep, she got up. Blaze flipped on the computer, bringing up her e-mail file. If anyone could give her information, it was her brother. She hit
reply
to one of his old e-mails and added a new header before beginning to type.

Yo, bro. How are things? How are Nina and the kids? Are you all ready for Christmas? We are. I wish you would reconsider coming for my wedding. I would love for you to meet Zar. I could fly the whole family up first class. I know you don’t want to see Mommy, but?

Anyway, I am writing you tonight because I need some information. I am hoping you can help me. I need to know about a drug named Xzarant. I have heard that it is pretty nasty stuff. I need to know if anyone has done any recent studies on it and if there is some kind of antidote or reversal drug. It’s really important.

I hope all is well, and have a Merry Christmas.

She sent the e-mail and then sat back to think. Her seller page was bright with green numbers, and she read through the recent bids. She had a good amount of things that would close just after Christmas, and then she had nothing left to sell. She had stopped going to tag sales, and the cellar was totally cleaned of unwanted items. No sooner had she finished looking, than the mail icon flashed, and she opened the page.

Hey, sis. Everyone here is fine, and you know that I won’t come. I am sorry. I am glad that you have found someone new, but I don’t want to see our mother. I can’t forgive her.

Why do you want to know about Xzarant? You are right. It is a nasty drug. I don’t know all that much about it, but what I do know is bad. It was taken off the market as even a test drug when it was found to cause bone deterioration. If it had only been near the injection site it would be one thing, but it wasn’t. The drug was found to affect the bone and cartilage around the injection site to a considerable degree. The amount of damage depended on how long the patient had used the drug and how much was administered. The worst cases were those who had received biweekly injections for more than six months. Luckily, or maybe unluckily, for those involved, they were dying of cancer, and they died off before their bones could crumble. It would have been a breakthrough in pain treatment if it hadn’t been so dangerous. I can check for you. I think that one of the other colleges is working on a derivative of Xzarant. Don’t quote me on that. I can’t check until after Christmas. Let me know if you want me to pursue it, and why do you ask?

Blaze ran her hand through her hair and picked up the phone to call him. Art answered sleepily, and Blaze said, “Hey, I didn’t want to send this info over the net. This is a big secret.”

“Hey, Blaze. So what is the mystery?”

“Zar had a really bad accident a little over five years ago. He sustained major damage to his leg and hip. The worse the weather, the more pain he is in. His doctor got him into the original test group for the Xzarant pain drug. By the time he found out the truth, he was unwilling to give up the pain relief. His doctor said that because he was healthy, he had twenty or twenty-five years before the drug would affect him. The doctor is dead, and Zar is out of shots. He is in a lot of pain, and I fear what has been done to him.”

“Oh, shit. Zar is the guy you are marrying? I think you should reconsider. Get him to your doctor and fast. He could be walking along and have his hip crumble with no warning. I will find out whatever I can for you and get back to you. I am sorry I can’t give you more information tonight. The colleges are shut down for Christmas. I could probably go in tomorrow and look through the lab computer, but I don’t know if the study I am thinking of is still happening. If it is, I don’t know if the central computer base is current. I might be able to get in touch with one of the research team and find out that way. I’ll call or e-mail you as soon as I know anything. Sit tight, little sister.”

“I will, Art, and thank you. If you need anything, just let me know. I seem to have become a very rich lady. It has its advantages, but wealth is not all it’s cracked up to be. Right now there is only one thing I want, and my money may not do me any good. Have a nice Christmas.”

“You, too. Don’t give up hope. There is always hope. Good night, Blaze.”

“Good night, Art.”

She hung up the phone and sat back as the flood of tears came. The computer screen got too blurry to read, and Blaze wiped at her eyes, trying to clear them. It was a useless gesture, and her tears seemed unstoppable as she shut the computer down and sat in the darkness crying.

Zar sat up, a nightmare pulling him from sleep. Blaze was not in the bed with him, and he went looking for her. She was sitting in the shadow of the light coming in from the street, and he could hear her sobbing. Zar stood for a moment, unsure of what to do, and then, without a word, went back to bed.

When Blaze slid in next to him a short while later, he didn’t open his eyes. She snuggled closer, avoiding his hip. He groaned and put his arm around her, asking in a mock sleepy tone, “Where did you go?”

“I wanted to check my bids. Almost everything is sold.”