Ten Thousand Words (41 page)

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Authors: Kelli Jean

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Xanthe settled into me, sighing. I dropped a kiss atop her head, inhaling her scent.

My goddess, I will never let you go now.

Ollie

Once we got up, showered, and had some coffee, Xanthe and I headed to the bookstore, so I could finish signing the swag.

Jaime laughed. “Only you would come in on your day off, Xanthe.”

The two of them stood behind the counter, laughing at shit they found on the Internet, while I sat and scribbled my name on the cards. When I finished, I put everything in the box and headed behind the counter to see what they were looking at.

Porn.

My love and her best friend were watching porn GIFs on a blog.

“Really?” I scoffed.

“Research,” they both replied, making me laugh.

“You’re just a couple of perverts.”

“Yes,” said Jaime. “To our rotten souls.”

“Come on, perv. Let’s go to the post office,” I said, pulling Xanthe away.

With my penance served, I felt lighter.

Hand in hand, we headed out of the post office for a spot to have lunch. We hadn’t eaten yet, and I was starving. A café that served great food was not too far from where I lived.

“Where are we going?” she asked, pushing her sunglasses up the bridge of her nose. She had put on her contacts before leaving this morning.

“Have you been to Vinkel’s?”

“Sure.”

“I was thinking we could go there.”

“All right.”

She was so agreeable and sweet right now. I wished I could capture it on film. Her face was smooth but not expressionless. A little smile upturned the corners of her mouth, giving me the urge to kiss her. So, I did. She giggled, and I wanted to throw her over my shoulder and hoof it home as fast as I could.

Vinkel’s was just as I liked it at this hour—empty. Except for a couple of stragglers at the bar, we were all by ourselves, and we took a table by the window to watch passersby.

“What do you want to have, love?” I asked, watching her glance through the short menu.

She placed it down on the table. “I don’t even know. Surprise me. And coffee.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah. There’s not much I won’t eat. Get your two favorites, and we’ll share.”

I’d never dare such a thing with the women I used to frequent with. They all had strict diets. But Xanthe wasn’t a damn thing like them, and I smiled at that thought as I made my way up to the bar to place the order.

“Things seem to have calmed down with the Donovan groupies,” she stated when I sat back down with a couple of lattes.

I nodded. “Yeah. I haven’t been harassed at all recently. Is that a bad thing?”

“No. The hype always dies down after a while.”

“Well, I’ve also been holed up with work and chasing after this one chick.”

Her grin and blush were just so adorable. “Oh, yeah? How’s that working for you?”

“Awesome. I plan on bringing her round my place after we finish here. I live just a few minutes away.”

“Really?” She looked excited.

I’d felt the same way when I was invited into her home.

“Yeah,” I replied, grinning at her enthusiasm.

She smiled shyly, staring down at her latte. “When we first met,” she said softly, “I thought you were a dick. I was crushed that the man I’d found to play Donovan was an asshole. I didn’t want to tell you I was Elaine because then maybe you’d just be nice to me because of that. I wanted to see who you really were when I was just…me.”

“Yeah. I don’t blame you for that.”

“I had the biggest crush on you. After Rex told me who you were, I thought I’d hit the jackpot when you agreed to do the covers,” she told me. “I did some research. I saw all the photos of you out with your friends. You’re in all the right circles, hanging out with all the local celebrities.”

“None of them, Xanthe—
none
of them—can compare to you. Everything about you makes me come alive in ways I never even knew were possible. I don’t know exactly what it was, but something about you made me stop and consider my life differently. I’d thought I knew who I was, what I wanted. I’d thought I was
happy
. Then, you walked in, and everything felt…
wrong
, like I didn’t fit into my own skin anymore.”

“Wow,” she said quietly.

“Don’t you feel that way, too?” I reached out and took her hands.

She paused while considering this. “I suppose so. At first, I just wanted to come out of this alive, you know?”

“Not really.”

She shrugged. “I didn’t want to lose myself to you. I knew I’d never be able to resist you. You just wouldn’t let me.”

“Love, I was never able to resist you either,” I assured her.

Then, I thought of Christmas being around the corner, and I didn’t want to spend the holidays away from her. She’d become the most important person in my life. Not to be with her at the most festive time of the year was unthinkable to me.

“What are you doing for the holidays?” I asked. “Do you have plans?”

“Um, yeah,” she said. “I’m going to my dad’s with Aunt Ellen, Rex, and Beefcake. What about you?”

“I was planning on staying at my parents’ in London. Where does your dad live again?”

“Oxford.”

“We’ll have to figure out how we’ll work it out. You think your family would be up to having Christmas in London?”

“Oh. I don’t know. Maybe?”

I worried my bottom lip with my teeth, wondering if I was going too fast for her. “I could stay with you,” I suggested, keeping my voice soft. “Unless…would your dad have an issue with me staying with you?”

She snorted with laughter. “Yeah, that wouldn’t be a problem.”

“Is there some other problem then?”

“Not that I’m aware of. Do you want to come stay with me for the holidays?”

I blasted her with a huge smile. “I’d love to.”

She laughed. “Then, I guess it’s settled.”

“You have to meet my family though. My mom’s going to freak out to know I have an actual girlfriend.”

“I’ll see what my dad says. He’s always down for new things. It’s not like we have ingrained traditions or anything.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. “That was a bit insensitive of me. I’d forgotten…”

She shook her head. “No, it wasn’t. True, we don’t go all out, but we always come together for the holidays. When Rex was, um…disowned—”

“He was disowned?” I asked, incredulous.

“His father was a huge homophobe, and his mother…well, Rex spends the holidays with me and Dad and Aunt Ellen. He’s family.”

“Trey will be happy about that. He might steal Rex from you all.”

“It’s about damn time someone did,” she retorted. Then, her face turned thoughtful. “You know, you don’t have to be careful about what you say to me. I’m not some fragile thing that’ll shatter if hard memories are mentioned. I’ve had more holidays without my mom and grandma than I’ve had with them.”

She might not shatter, but…

“I might,” I told her.

Her eyebrows rose. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, it hurts me to think of you suffering at all. And with George out, I’m worried,” I said quietly. “What you went through changed you. It scared you to the point where it’s a struggle for you to trust people.”

Releasing my hands, she sat back. I didn’t realize why until she looked up at the person standing next to our table.

The bartender placed our food down in front of us, a smile on his face. “Anything else I can get you?”

“Not for me, thanks,” I replied.

“No, thank you,” said Xanthe.

I’d ordered the corned beef and sauerkraut sandwich with fried potatoes and two French onion soups. With my appetite suddenly diminished, I stared at the food. Xanthe, on the other hand, had no such qualms, digging her spoon into the cheese topping of the soup. I took a moment to enjoy watching her eat. She was damn sexy when she did.

“I think we need to discuss the George thing,” she said just as I was about to take a huge bite of the sandwich.

My stomach went sour, and I placed it back on the plate.

“Sure,” I replied.

“You’ve made light of the mentality of some people—”

“I don’t think you’re insane!” I snapped, losing my cool. “Or people who get tattoos—”

Startled, she looked up into my eyes. “I’m trying to make a point.”

I simmered down. “I’m sorry.”

She put her spoon down and stared at it for a few seconds. “George Kastor is
truly
insane, Ollie. That’s what’s so terrifying. He was given a lighter sentence and placed in a mental ward for what he had done. With medication, he’s lucid.”

“How do you know this?” I asked.

“Ronen looked into it.”

“How…what? How does he have access to that sort of information?”

Xanthe took a deep breath. “I can’t tell you. I’m not allowed to.”

Anger sparked in my chest. “Don’t you trust me?”

“It’s not like that. The less who know, the better.”

A strange numb-like sensation stole through me. “You have to tell me something, Xanthe. You can’t just say something like that and leave it.”

“I suppose we’d have to discuss this sooner or later, but…”

She looked out the window, and I could see she was searching for a way to say what she needed to tell me.

“There are…things…in my life I can’t tell anyone about. I need to be honest with you about that. These things don’t interrupt my daily life right now. But there will come a time when it will…” She sighed. “I’m part of an organization that helps victims of sex trafficking acclimate back into society. Aunt Ellen and Jaime, too. There’s more to it than what I can tell you right now.”

“Why would you need to keep something like that secret?” I asked.

“Because the organization is secret. It has to be. It’s the only way we’re able to rescue these people at all. I’ve been a part of it for a long time. I have known since I was sixteen that this was going to be my life.”

“And Ellen and Jaime are a part of it,” I said softly, a little stunned by what she was telling me. “What about Ricki and—”

“There’s more to Ricki, Ronen, and Rex than I’m allowed to say,” she said. “We’re all so close, and we don’t keep secrets from each other for more than just the sake of friendship. It’s vital to what we do. I shouldn’t be talking about it at all, and what I’ve told you already needs to stay between us.”

“Of course.” I stared in awe at Xanthe.

Ronen had told me the night I met him and Lilla that there was so much I didn’t know about my woman. Beneath her normal, quirky hipster life was a person who had dedicated herself to helping others. The fact that she had to do it in secret was strange, but it made sense, too.

Struck with a revelation, I said, “Ronen gave me a clue.”

Her eyes widened. “Seriously?”

“I asked if”—I pitched my voice to a whisper—“Ricki was some sort of vigilante revenge-seeker, and Ronen said he was. That, and my manhood was constantly under threat. I thought Ricki…who is he, Xanthe?” I whispered. “He’s more than a bloody tattooist, isn’t he?”

Xanthe cracked up.

“So…it’s true?” I whispered.

She wiped a tear from her eye and shrugged, but then she winked at me, letting me know I was right about that.

“What am I getting myself into here?” I asked.

She sobered up pretty quick. “It’s not dangerous to date me, I promise.”

Alarmed now, I was wondering if perhaps I should truly fear for my life.
If I hurt Xanthe’s feelings at all, will I end up missing body parts?

No. George beat her half to death, and they let him live.

A shiver danced its way down my sternum. “So, Ronen and Rex are vigilante revenge-seekers, too? How did you find such dangerous friends?” I whispered.

That made her grin from ear to bloody ear. “I don’t know, but they’re a helluva lot of fun.”

Damn. My woman is just full of fucking surprises.

Xanthe

Oliver’s home was quite nice. Three stories, and the main floor was an open-plan space. The second floor had three bedrooms, one that had been turned into a dark room. The top floor was his bedroom and home office with a bathroom. He didn’t live over-the-top or anything, but he certainly had a sense of luxury and great style. Everything was clean and shiny. All of the appliances were stainless steel. There were light pinewood floors with throw rugs.

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