The Anniversary Party (4 page)

It didn't change a thing, though. Not the feel of phantom hands on her skin. Not the total recall of how hard his erection had felt sliding over her engorged clit. Not the memory of how wonderful Wade's mouth had tasted crushed against hers. Invading her. Taking her in a kiss so deep she had felt her toes curl in her tennis shoes. It didn't change one damn thing. She couldn't let herself be with him. She would not give into the feelings that were threatening to suffocate her or force her to her knees. He had left her and she wouldn't degrade herself by wanting him again.

Eight years he had been gone. After pledging his undying love, planning a future with her, he'd up and left. Gone off without a word. Without a note.

His parents had had to break the news and help pick up the pieces. “He called us, Kylie. He says he's joined the Army. He wouldn't even tell us why. Just that he'd keep in touch and asked that we deliver a message to you,” Terri Sinclair had said. She had wiped her swollen eyes with a tissue and cleared her throat. Waiting. She let Kylie compose herself and bring her own tears under control. Her heart was breaking, it had been evident, but her concern for Kylie's wounded heart had been obvious.

Finally, Kylie had managed the question in a strangled voice. “What was the message, Terri?"

"That he's sorry and that no matter what you might think, he has always loved you. Always will.” The other woman's voice had cracked on the final word. Her bloodshot eyes had met Kylie's. Searching for any sense that Kylie might know why he had gone. Kylie didn't have a clue. Her only thought was that it must have been to get away from what they had. That she was suffocating him. That all the dreams they'd shared and plotted well into the wee hours hadn't really been what he wanted. It had all been a lie.

But the words haunted her.
He had always loved her. Always would.

Kylie slammed the pantry door so hard the kitchen window rattled. If he'd loved her so damn much, why had he up and left?

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Kylie felt her mood lighten just a bit as she neared her parents’ house. Maybe her mother was right. She simply needed a nice dinner with her family. Some good wine, great food, and her father's silly jokes should make her feel better. She felt extremely blessed to have come from such a tight-knit family. Even when they were ready to kill each other, the Walkers were as thick as thieves. She made a promise to herself that she wouldn't be too hard on Fawn. In fact, the biggest obstacle of the night wouldn't be forgiving her sister, it would be making sure Fawn didn't slip and mention the surprise party.

She turned into the driveway and nearly slammed into the navy blue sedan parked near the end.

"Mom must have invited someone else to dinner,” she muttered. That wasn't like her mother. She usually preferred quiet, relaxed dinners. Just the four of them. Kylie grabbed her purse and checked her makeup in the rearview mirror. She didn't look too bad for someone running on four hours sleep and hardly any food. She fluffed her curls and checked her teeth for lipstick. Climbing from the car, she wrapped her coat around her tightly against the January wind.

The door opened before she was halfway up the steps. Fawn grinned at her and handed her a glass of red wine even as Kylie pulled the screen door open.

"Have a feeling you'll be needing this, sissy,” Fawn said and stepped back to let her in.

When Kylie stepped into the living room, she nearly dropped her goblet. Staring at her from the archway into the dining room was Wade. She let out a nervous sigh as she felt her hands start to shake.

"Maybe I should take that back for a moment,” Fawn whispered, taking the wineglass from her sister's hand. She rubbed Kylie's arm gently and leaned in and whispered in Kylie's ear, “You can do this. Consider it practice for the party. Just stay calm. I'll help you make a break for it if it's too much."

Kylie couldn't help but smile. Fawn sounded as if she was ready to help her escape from prison. “Thanks, Fawnie. I may take you up on it. Did you know he would be here?” she hissed. “If you did, Fawn, so help me—"

Fawn raised her hands in mock surrender, her long black hair swaying around her shoulders. “Hey, don't shoot the messenger. I had no idea. They showed up not ten minutes after me."

Wade stared at her from the dining room, his face caught somewhere between concern, embarrassment, and humor. He raised one hand and waggled his fingers at her in greeting.

Kylie waved back and tried to smile; it felt more like a deathly grimace stretched across her face. She was grateful no parents were in the room to see her discomfort. Her mother would never intentionally set her up for embarrassment; she must have assumed that Kylie's heart had long since healed. The Sinclairs were her parents’ closest friends. It would be perfectly natural for Carol to invite them to dinner along with their son. One big happy reunion.

"Give me the wine now.” Kylie sighed and grabbed for the glass. “Have the bottle ready.” Then she downed the wine in one gulp.

Fawn giggled like a little girl and grabbed the bottle from the coffee table. She held the bottle at the ready, wagging her eyebrows for effect. When all else failed, the Walker girls turned to humor. It was a trait they had shared since childhood. “Is Madame sufficiently soused or does she need more?"

Kylie wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and stuck the glass out. “Madame needs more. A lot more. In fact, just stick a straw in the bottle."

Fawn laughed again and refilled her glass. From the corner of her eye, Kylie could see Wade witnessing them employ their silly coping mechanism. She could feel his gaze boring into her skin, making her heat up, causing a flush to rise in her cheeks. Fuck it. Let him stare. He could stare all he wanted as long as he behaved. She'd been ambushed and embarrassed, that was enough for one night. If he thought he was going to paw all over her again like some horny teenager he had another think coming. She wasn't some convenient trollop he could bed as he breezed through town on his way to the next job. The next adventure.

Kylie took a prim sip of her second glass as the effects of the first quickly seeped into her tight muscles. Her head swam for an instant and she had to remind herself to breathe. “That might not have been such a good idea,” she muttered to Fawn.

"Here, eat a hunk of cheese.” Fawn shoved several dainty slices of cheese into her hand just as her mother came through the archway.

"Kylie! I didn't know you were here. Come on in, sweetheart. Aren't you going to take your coat off and stay awhile?” she said with a smile. Watching her mother's face, Kylie could see the unspoken question.
Are you okay, Kylie? I haven't made a mistake, have I?

She shook her head and shed her coat. Kylie hugged her mom and kissed her dad and greeted the Sinclairs. All the things a proper young lady should do. Under it all she felt a sickening pulse of unease. Wade stared at her openly. She remembered that look. It was a look of concern. Kylie attempted to keep her eyes on everyone, anyone, but him. The magnetic pull won, though. She let her eyes roam over him. His hair was freshly washed, hurriedly combed. He had shaved and there was a small red mark on his left cheekbone where he had nicked himself. Her eyes skittered over his wide, muscular shoulders swathed in a blue button-down shirt. A tiny vee of his smooth chest was visible above the two buttons he had left undone.

She tried to control it but her gaze fell to the gray dress slacks he wore. They did very little to conceal magnificently muscled thighs, lean hips, and an ass she could bounce a quarter off. And under the fly. Oh, under the fly was the stuff X-rated dreams were made of.

Kylie forced herself to look up. She found Wade staring at her, one eyebrow raised, a hesitant but sly grin on his face. Kylie felt herself blush because she had a feeling that even after all these years, he could still read her mind.

I think I'm going to be sick.

Stop it!

Don't pass out.

Stop it!

Would it be wrong to climb him like a monkey in heat? Oh, sweet Jesus, what is happening to me?

Her mind raced as she took her seat. Kylie couldn't follow the conversation. The running monologue of worry and fear filled her head. She barely tasted the roast beef. Her favorite mashed potatoes tasted like sawdust. The only thing she could taste was the wine and she was meticulous about drinking it slowly. The last thing she needed was to throw up or pass out at the dinner table. As much as her mom loved her, she doubted she would appreciate that kind of family memory.

"Kylie?"

She followed the voice and found her father looking at her worriedly. “Sorry, Dad. What'd you say?"

"I said, are you okay? You've barely spoken tonight.” Pat Walker's bright red hair was cut within a half inch of his scalp. His normally jovial face was drawn with concern.

Kylie forced a laugh. “I'm fine. I guess I just zoned out. I'm a little tired and I think I'm getting a headache. In fact,” she rose and dropped her linen napkin onto the seat of her chair, “I think I'll go out for some fresh air. That usually helps the headaches pass."

"Want me to come with you?” Fawn chirped with fake cheer.

"No. I think I'll be fine alone. Just need to clear my head. Great dinner, Mom. Best mashed potatoes on earth.” Then she beat a hasty retreat out the back door. She didn't manage a deep breath until she heard the wooden screen door slam.
Free!
She could think again and her main thought was that she had to leave. The question was, how did she leave and not hurt her parents’ feelings?

Wade watched Kylie take off for the second time that day. The sight of her back, held painfully straight, was becoming a familiar sight. He sighed, put down his own napkin, and stood.

"If y'all will excuse me, I have a feeling this is my fault. I think I might go out there and see what I can do about setting it right."

"I didn't think—” Carol Walker twisted her napkin viciously, her face pale. Her big blue eyes, almost identical to Kylie's, shone with unwanted tears. “I had no idea she would react like this. I feel so awful..."

Wade raised a hand and smiled. “Miss Carol, it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me. Not only am I back but we ... we ran into each other this morning. I think she was already upset when she arrived. Please don't blame yourself."

Carol nodded, looking unconvinced. Wade realized she was deep in the throes of motherly guilt. There wasn't a damn thing he could do to stop it. “I'll be back,” he said quietly. He pulled on his jacket and tried to steady his nerves. If he was any kind of man at all, he'd go out there and tell her the truth. No matter how much it hurt her. No matter how much it hurt him.

Kylie sank onto the double swing and let herself rock. She forced her muscles to relax, forced herself to breathe deep. She really had to get back into her yoga routine before she ended up twisted in knots. Closing her eyes, she listened to the night sounds, few and far between due to the chilly temperatures but there just under the surface. She heard a dog barking somewhere down the block and the whooshing of traffic on the main street.

Her heart skipped when she heard the wood screen door bang an alert. Someone was coming. She prayed it was Fawn or even her mother, but the way her stomach fluttered with nervousness, she knew it was Wade. He was still ensconced in darkness when he spoke.

"You okay? And before you answer, I just want you to know that I had no idea. I didn't think you and Fawn would be here. I would never have come and put you in that position. Not after ... not since I lost control this morning."

Kylie felt a bubble of laughter rise out of her throat. “Lost control? You mean groping me in the pickle aisle?” For some reason the whole ridiculous thing suddenly struck her as hysterical. Powerless to stop herself, she let the giggles take over.

Wade stepped forward and the soft glow of a distant streetlight revealed his serious face. “What's so funny? You're not having some kind of breakdown, are you?” He looked so sincere, so intent, it made Kylie laugh harder.

"You know, I believe I am. I think I may very well be ready for the booby hatch. Wanna call and book me a room?"

"Look,” he whispered, leaning close to be heard. His big hands steadied the swing and forced her to stillness. Kylie felt her breath suddenly solidify in her lungs. He was so close. Close enough for her to smell the fruity scent of wine on his lips. “Can we please take a walk? Talk away from the house. I know this sounds paranoid, but I can almost feel them all in there. Faces pressed against the window, watching our every move. It's freaking me out."

"My mom knows I'm upset?"

"Christ, Kylie! She's your
mother
. She was wringing her hands when I left. She kept saying she should have told you. She just had no idea it would upset you. It's been so long.” The last words were barely audible.

"It has been so long.” She sighed. Kylie stood and pulled her coat tighter against the cold. Thank goodness she'd had the presence of mind to grab it before fleeing the house. “Let's walk down to the gazebo. Dad said he put new chairs out there. It'll be a good excuse as to why we wandered off."

"Thank you,” he said a little too earnestly for Kylie's taste. She wanted to hate him or, at the very least, be angry with him. Wade took her hand in his. His hand was so large, so warm, so
male
. The heat felt good on her cold fingers but what felt better was the familiarity. She let herself enjoy the feel of those hands again. Hands that had traveled and explored every part of her body. There was no harm in enjoying it for just a
moment
.

"Let's go. I'm starting to lose the feeling in my face."

Wade followed her in the dark, still holding tight to her hand. Every so often his thumb would sweep a small circle across her palm and Kylie felt her insides heat up and start to soften. How very erotic it was. It was just fingers running over the palm of her hand but it inspired so many more sensual thoughts. It made her wonder what the gentle caress of his fingers would feel like on other parts of her body. Other very eager parts. When she curled her fingers with unease, he released her hand willingly.