The Best I Could (33 page)

After taking our drink orders, she left.

Jonathan grinned. “Every night looks like
Friday night in here.”

Summer was a season for letting loose, and my
brother had been around town more than I had since arriving. I
wasn’t envious. Partying was something I excelled at, and I’d done
enough of it the past couple of years to hold me over for a
while.

Our waitress, a blonde with pink-tipped hair
and a big bosom, materialized at the table, smacking gum. She
plunked down the drink orders the hostess had gotten from us. By
the look of things, they were short staffed. “Know what you
want?”

We ordered, waited on the food in silence,
and then stuffed our faces when it came. Tansy was the only one who
didn’t order a burger, opting for a BLT and fries.

Mixing ketchup, mayonnaise, and mustard on
her plate, she dunked the fries.

Jonathan’s lips puckered. “That’s gross.”

Tansy laughed. “What? Mixing the condiments
or eating it with the fries?”

“Both,” he answered.

Tansy kept eating, drawing her feet onto the
booth seat to hug her knees. The hostess had placed us under a
vent, and the chilly air blasted over our heads.

I scooted closer to her, pressing the side of
my body against hers.

Deena glanced at the window next to us, at
the restaurant’s reflection in the glass, the lights and the
laughing customers. “Do you think we’ll look back at this one day
and see this night as an epiphany?”

“Epiphany?” I asked, choking on my burger.
“This from the mouth of a girl who couldn’t even use correct
grammar when we met.”

Deena glared. “Could to. Just chose not
to.”

“A sudden, profound understanding of life,”
Tansy murmured, her gaze finding her sister. “I think tonight
counts.”

Deena threw a look at Jonathan, who was
frowning at his cellphone. “Maybe.”

Tansy pointed a mixed condiment-drenched fry
at my brother. “Your face will stick that way if you keep frowning
like that.”

“Sometimes I hate social media.” Jonathan
slid his phone across the table, directly in my line of vision.

There, on the screen, was a picture of
Jonathan’s dad, a young woman, and a splayed hand with a diamond
ring on it.

“Dream vacation, my ass,” Jonathan murmured.
“He could have told me he was going to ask her to marry him. It’s
not like I don’t like her.”

Deena leaned over the table. “Who?”

“She’s pretty,” Tansy offered, looking at the
phone.

Jonathan shrugged. “She’s okay.” Glancing at
Deena, he said, “That’s my dad’s girlfriend. They’ve been together
for three years now.”

“Holy cow!” Deena whistled. “Don’t worry
about it, then. Three years is forever. They’re practically married
by time.”

“It’s the ring that bothers you, isn’t it?”
Tansy asked, lowering her head to catch Jonathan’s gaze. “It makes
forever promises that aren’t always easy to keep.”

“I don’t know,” he muttered. “Would have felt
better if they’d told me before she posted it. Meredith is all
about posting pics online. Like the happier she looks, the more
real it is.”

“I’ve met her, Jon. She’s decent. A picture
monger maybe, but she’ll be good to you. And your dad will have
someone when you move out after senior year,” I pointed out.

My brother, unlike Heather and I, had a
decent, drama-free childhood after Child Protective Services put
him with his father. Dean Blackledge worshipped his son, so much
so, that he’d put off getting into a serious relationship until his
son was in high school.

“I think that’s it,” Jonathan admitted. “I
wish he would have waited until after I graduated. I’ve gotten used
to it just being me and him.”

“Where are they?” Deena asked, finally
getting a good look at the picture. “That scenery is
ridiculous.”

“The Maldives,” Jonathan answered.

Tansy leaned into me, unconsciously seeking
warmth, and heat surged through me. She seemed much smaller balled
up on the booth seat.

“He may wait until after graduation. It’s
only a ring so far.” She studied him, and then arched a brow. “From
the look on your face, I’m betting he didn’t say anything about the
ring at all.”

Jonathan shoved a fry into his mouth.
“Whatever.”

I knew better. My brother was disturbed by
the picture. It didn’t matter that Meredith was a good person, he
liked his family the way it was, and I didn’t blame him for
that.

“So you live with your dad then?” Deena
asked, throwing Jonathan a sidelong glance.

“Yeah, in Washington D.C.”

Deena’s shoulders fell. “Oh … so you won’t go
to school here in the fall?”

“No.”

“I will be,” Tansy said suddenly, recognizing
her sister’s slide into depression. “Or near anyway. Maybe a
two-year college program in Atlanta until I can explore other
options.”

Deena’s gaze found mine. “And you?”

“Michigan,” I answered. “I’ve been accepted
into the University of Michigan.”

Tansy stilled next to me, the news sinking
in, conflicting emotions fighting for dominance on her face. “Let’s
worry about summer first,” she said, smiling.

Despite her words, I didn’t miss how she
leaned away from me, putting distance between us.

“I thought you were a boxer?” Deena asked,
not letting it go.

I dragged a fry into a pool of ketchup. “It’s
something I love to do, but it’s not my sole career choice. Most of
my boxing career has been made up of amateur matches, two
professional, before the DUI charges.”

At fourteen, Deena didn’t care about career
choices. She cared about change, about how much she hated it.

“I’m betting the guys in your boxing class
will be at the high school this fall.”

“Wonderful,” Deena murmured. “Just what I
need.”

Roger’s olive-skinned face flashed in my
mind’s eye, and I chuckled. “I think you’ll make it, Deena. You’re
a tough kid.”

For some reason, those words cheered her, and
she glanced at me, eyes smiling.

An upbeat, popular song came on over the loud
speaker, and the patrons cheered, a group of them getting up to
dance.

Deena laughed.

“Hey!” a cheerful, slurred voice cried. “Eli
Lockston?”

Poufy, blonde-haired Vanessa stumbled into
our booth, two friends—a brunette and a dyed redhead—attached to
her. They giggled.

I smiled at them.

Jonathan’s amused gaze swept the table, his
dad temporarily forgotten. “You look good and wasted,” he pointed
out.

“The best kind,” she agreed, swaying to the
music. “I don’t think I’ve seen y’all around at night much. You
should join us sometime.” She gestured at her two friends, and then
waved at a table across the room where five other people sat, four
guys and another girl.

“We’ll let you know if we can,” I promised,
knowing good and well I never would. Not because I was against
partying it up with Vanessa, but because I had too much on the line
this summer … with the DUI and Tansy.

“Jonathan,” my brother suddenly introduced,
getting their attention.

Vanessa’s eyes widened. “Oh, I’m sorry!” She
inclined her head at the two girls. “This is Autumn and Carlee.”
She nodded at us. “And this is Deena and Tansy. They’re sisters.
And Eli and Jonathan. They’re brothers. Eli’s doing some work at
the rescue league. Community service for a DUI.”

Instant interest.

What was it about women and bad boys? Say one
thing about being arrested, and they suddenly wanted in your
pants.

The girls with Vanessa flicked a look at
Tansy, noticed how close she sat to me, and squinted.

Carlee, the brunette, waved her hand at her.
“You’ve got an interesting name.”

“And an interesting look,” Autumn, the
redhead, added, giggling.

Tansy offered them a smile. “I’m named after
a flower. A toxic flower. Eat large quantities of it, and it can be
deadly. One moment, you’re fine, and then … wham!” She clapped.

The girls jumped.

Vanessa frowned. “Alrighty, then. Well, we
need to go back to our group.” Her eyes found mine. “Think about
joining us sometime.”

Jonathan chuckled, his gaze following them
across the room. “Is that true? The whole toxic flower thing?”

“Partly,” Tansy answered, grinning. “It’s not
how I got the name, but it was fun to watch their faces.”

“Bitches,” Deena mumbled.

“No, they’re not.” Tansy looked at her
sister. “Not really. They’re just having a good time and hitting on
guys.”

I stared at her, at the way
her shirt rode low on her shoulder. “How
did
you get your name?”

“Mom had this weird naming thing,” Deena
answered for her. Sucking tea up her straw, she swallowed and
grinned. “It was symbolic. Deena means valley, and so it reminded
her of the earth. Jet was named after an aircraft because it
reminded her of flying. High and low.” Her face sobered, brows
furrowing. “Tansy, coming between us, got the most ironic name of
us all.”

Tansy stiffened. “Immortality,” she
whispered. “My name means immortality.”

Deena snorted. “Stupid, right? Like any of us
are immortal. After Mom and Dad, I’ve learned that life is like a
set of playing cards. You just have to wait until your hand is
played or your card is drawn.”

“That’s a depressing way of looking at it,”
Jonathan mumbled, glancing at her askance.

She shrugged. “Live and learn.”

My gaze remained on Tansy, on the way she
hugged herself. “If everyone is done, let’s get out of here.”

“Where to?” Jonathan asked.

“We’ll just drive until we find
something.”

Deena seemed hopeful. “With the windows
down?”

I smiled. “Every single one of them.”

Tansy

Wind … so much wind roaring around us,
swallowing up everything. Deena screamed into the night, fell back
laughing, and then did it again.

I stared at the back of the passenger seat,
my eyes on Eli’s head.

We’re wrong for each other.

The thought slammed into me inside the
restaurant the moment he mentioned Michigan, and it had grown
bigger ever since then, invading my thoughts, my heart, and my
body.

Everything we’d said and done. It couldn’t be
that easy. It couldn’t be that easy for us to trust each other, to
give up the vices we held onto. His distrust. Me and pain.

Eli pointed at an empty field, the moon
hanging over it, grass waving, and Jonathan pulled to the side of
the road.

“I am not cow tipping if that’s what you’re
getting at,” Jonathan said, cutting off the engine.

“You have no sense of adventure,” Eli teased.
“But no, I have no interest in pushing over cows. Let’s just
walk.”

“Boring!” Deena complained.

“Maybe.” Eli opened his door, climbed out,
and then glanced into the car. “But if I remember correctly, the
pond is just over the hill in the distance, and there was a time a
long time ago when we hid things in the woods …”

Jonathan laughed. “Shit, the old boat
house.”

Eli smiled. “Right before Grams died, she had
us hide things in a boathouse in the woods bordering the pond. We
could hide anything; it didn’t matter what. It was supposed to be
this huge scavenger hunt thing we could do the year after she died,
but no one really cared to do it. We just hid the stuff for her,
and then sort of forgot it. Or maybe, we just didn’t feel like
going back.”

Pushing open her door, Deena leapt out. “So
it’s like going on a treasure hunt.” She rubbed her hands together.
“I like it! We get to find out if Eli was as much a douche when he
was …” She paused and looked at him.

“Fourteen,” he supplied.

“Fourteen,” Deena repeated, “as he is
now.”

“Gee, thanks, kid.”

Jonathan guffawed. “She’s got your number,
brother.” Getting out, he stared out over the field. “I’m
game.”

Eli stepped back, opened my door, and offered
me his hand. “Come on, roof girl. It’s not much, but out here, not
much is still something.”

I accepted his hand, keeping my gaze
averted.

Jonathan and Deena hopped the fence and
started across the field, stirring fireflies as they went.
Pinpricks of light lifted into the sky.

Eli and I followed, more slowly.

“You’ve got something on your mind, don’t
you?” Eli asked.

“Whirlwind romance,” I answered,
distracted.

His brows rose. “Somehow, I was not expecting
that answer.”

Deena’s laugh echoed ahead of us, and I
glanced up to find her climbing onto Jonathan’s back. He carried
her piggyback-style, and she pumped her hand at the moon. Tomorrow,
she’d probably feel ridiculous looking back, but then again … maybe
not. She needed to be a kid. Now. While she had the chance to.

“You hear about whirlwind
romances, you know? You just never expect to get caught up in one,”
I told him. “Then the hospital roof happened.” Heart pounding, I
glanced at him. “It’s been maybe ten days since you walked into the
animal clinic.
Ten
days. Have you ever fallen for anyone that fast?”

Eli gazed up at the sky, at the stirred up
particles of dust and grass in the moonlit night.

When he didn’t say anything, I sighed. “I’ve
fallen into sex that fast,” I whispered. “With Jeff. Because it
felt good. Because I needed to get lost. I’m starting to wonder if
everything I’m feeling is kind of like that. Only more vivid and
wild and passionate. This whirlwind of strong emotions with someone
who might just understand them, making them stronger. With someone
I’ve shared too much information with. But love … people don’t fall
in love that fast, Eli.”

He nodded, considering. “And so you think my
feelings may be the same thing?”

“It’s been less than two weeks,” I pointed
out.