Read The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) Online
Authors: WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
“resolutely”: but his meaning is good.
SHALLOW
Ay, I think my cousin meant well.
Yes, I think my cousin meant well.
SLENDER
Ay, or else I would I might be hanged, la!
Yes I did, or otherwise may I be hanged, ha!
SHALLOW
Here comes fair Mistress Anne.
Re-enter ANNE PAGE
Would I were young for your sake, Mistress Anne!
Here comes lovely Mistress Anne.
You make me wish I was young, Mistress Anne!
ANNE PAGE
The dinner is on the table; my father desires your
worships' company.
Dinner is on the table; my father asks for
your worships to join him.
SHALLOW
I will wait on him, fair Mistress Anne.
I will be there, lovely Mistress Anne.
SIR HUGH EVANS
Od's plessed will! I will not be absence at the grace.
Exeunt SHALLOW and SIR HUGH EVANS
God be praised! I won't miss the grace.
ANNE PAGE
Will't please your worship to come in, sir?
Would you like to come in now, sir?
SLENDER
No, I thank you, forsooth, heartily; I am very well.
No, indeed, many thanks; I'm fine.
ANNE PAGE
The dinner attends you, sir.
Dinner is waiting for you, sir.
SLENDER
I am not a-hungry, I thank you, forsooth. Go,
sirrah, for all you are my man, go wait upon my
cousin Shallow.
Exit SIMPLE
A justice of peace sometimes may be beholding to his
friend for a man. I keep but three men and a boy
yet, till my mother be dead: but what though? Yet I
live like a poor gentleman born.
I'm not hungry, thank you, indeed. Go,
sir, although you are my servant, go and wait on
my cousin Shallow.
A justice of the peace might sometimes lend his
friend a servant. I just employ three men and a boy
now, until my mother is dead: what about it? But I
live as though I was born poor.
ANNE PAGE
I may not go in without your worship: they will not
sit till you come.
I can't go back without your worship: they will not
begin until you come.
SLENDER
I' faith, I'll eat nothing; I thank you as much as
though I did.
I swear, I'll eat nothing: but I thank you
just the same.
ANNE PAGE
I pray you, sir, walk in.
Please sir, come in.
SLENDER
I had rather walk here, I thank you. I bruised
my shin th' other day with playing at sword and
dagger with a master of fence; three veneys for a
dish of stewed prunes; and, by my troth, I cannot
abide the smell of hot meat since. Why do your
dogs bark so? be there bears i' the town?
I'd rather stay out here, thank you. I bruised
my shin the other day in a sword and
dagger fight with a fencing master; we had three
bouts for a bet for a dish of stewed prunes, and I swear
I haven't been able to stand the smell of cooked meats since. Why are your
dogs barking like that? Are there bears in town?
ANNE PAGE
I think there are, sir; I heard them talked of.
I think there are, sir; I heard people talking about them.
SLENDER
I love the sport well but I shall as soon quarrel at
it as any man in England. You are afraid, if you see
the bear loose, are you not?
I love bear bating but I will have a quarrel at
it as quickly as any man in England. You are afraid, if you see
the bear on the loose, aren't you?
ANNE PAGE
Ay, indeed, sir.
Yes, indeed, sir.
SLENDER
That's meat and drink to me, now. I have seen
Sackerson loose twenty times, and have taken him by
the chain; but, I warrant you, the women have so
cried and shrieked at it, that it passed: but women,
indeed, cannot abide 'em; they are very ill-favored
rough things.
Re-enter PAGE
Now that means nothing to me. I have seen
the bear Sackerson loose twenty times, and have grabbed
his chain; but, I promise you, the women screamed
and cried at it so much, it was amazing: but women
certainly can't stand them; they are very ugly
rough things.
PAGE
Come, gentle Master Slender, come; we stay for you.
Come in, gentle Master Slender, come in; we are waiting for you.
SLENDER
I'll eat nothing, I thank you, sir.
Thank you, sir, I don't want anything to eat.
PAGE
By cock and pie, you shall not choose, sir! come, come.
By cock and pie, you shall not choose, sir! Come on, come on.
SLENDER
Nay, pray you, lead the way.
No, please, you lead the way.
PAGE
Come on, sir.
Come on, sir.
SLENDER
Mistress Anne, yourself shall go first.
Mistress Anne, after you.
ANNE PAGE
Not I, sir; pray you, keep on.
Not me, sir; please, you go ahead.
SLENDER
I'll rather be unmannerly than troublesome.
You do yourself wrong, indeed, la!
Exeunt
I'd rather be rude then cause trouble.
You are putting yourself down, really, ha ha!
Enter SIR HUGH EVANS and SIMPLE
SIR HUGH EVANS
Go your ways, and ask of Doctor Caius' house which
is the way: and there dwells one Mistress Quickly,
which is in the manner of his nurse, or his dry
nurse, or his cook, or his laundry, his washer, and
his wringer.
Go about your business, and ask the way to Doctor Caius'
house: someone called Mistress Quickly lives there,
she is his nurse, or his dry nurse,
or his cook, or his laundry woman, his dishwasher, and
his clothes dryer.
SIMPLE
Well, sir.
Good, sir.
SIR HUGH EVANS
Nay, it is petter yet. Give her this letter; for it
is a 'oman that altogether's acquaintance with
Mistress Anne Page: and the letter is, to desire
and require her to solicit your master's desires to
Mistress Anne Page. I pray you, be gone: I will
make an end of my dinner; there's pippins and cheese to come.
Exeunt
No, we'll make it better. Give her this letter; this
woman is very well acquainted with
Mistress Anne Page: and the letter is asking
and ordering her to represent your master's feelings
to Mistress Anne Page. Please, go: I will
stay and finish my dinner: there's apples and cheese to finish.
Enter FALSTAFF, Host, BARDOLPH, NYM, PISTOL, and ROBIN
FALSTAFF
Mine host of the Garter!
Landlord of the Garter!
Host
What says my bully-rook? speak scholarly and wisely.
What's up you old devil? Speak intellectually and cleverly.
FALSTAFF
Truly, mine host, I must turn away some of my
followers.
To tell the truth, landlord, I will have to lay off some of
my followers.
Host
Discard, bully Hercules; cashier: let them wag; trot, trot.
Throw them off, good Hercules; sack them; let them hang; trot, trot.
FALSTAFF
I sit at ten pounds a week.
I lodge at ten pounds a week.
Host
Thou'rt an emperor, Caesar, Keisar, and Pheezar. I
will entertain Bardolph; he shall draw, he shall
tap: said I well, bully Hector?
You are an emperor, Caesar, Kaiser and Sultan. I
will take on Bardolph; he can serve the beer:
is this a good idea, good Hector?
FALSTAFF
Do so, good mine host.
Go ahead, my good host.
Host
I have spoke; let him follow.
To BARDOLPH
Let me see thee froth and lime: I am at a word; follow.
Exit
I have offered; let him take it up.
Let's see you in action: I don't waste words; follow me.
FALSTAFF
Bardolph, follow him. A tapster is a good trade:
an old cloak makes a new jerkin; a withered
serving-man a fresh tapster. Go; adieu.
Bardolph, follow him. Tending bar is a good trade:
you can make a new waistcoat out of an old cloak; a
decrepit servant can make a new barman. Go; good luck.
BARDOLPH