The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) (597 page)

BOOK: The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)
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Away, away! For he is coming here.

 

[Exeunt.]

 

[Re-enter PETRUCHIO.]

 

PETRUCHIO. Thus have I politicly begun my reign,

 

In this way I have strategically begun my rule,

 

And 'tis my hope to end successfully.

 

And it's my hope to end successfully.

 

My falcon now is sharp and passing empty.

 

My falcon [Kate] is now very hungry.

 

And till she stoop she must not be full-gorg'd,

 

And until she gives in she must not be full or comfortable.

 

For then she never looks upon her lure.

 

For then she will never behave as I wish.

 

Another way I have to man my haggard,

 

I have another way to train my wife,

 

To make her come, and know her keeper's call,

That is, to watch her, as we watch these kites

 

That is, to watch her, as we watch these hawks

 

That bate and beat, and will not be obedient.

 

That bite and fight, and will not be obedient.

 

She eat no meat to-day, nor none shall eat;

 

She ate no food today, and she will eat none;

 

Last night she slept not, nor to-night she shall not;

 

Last night she did not sleep, and tonight she shall not;

 
 

As with the meat, some undeserved fault

 

As with the food, I'll find some nonexistent problem

 

I'll find about the making of the bed;

 

With the making of the bed;

 

And here I'll fling the pillow, there the bolster,

 

And here I'll throw the pillow, there the comforter,

 

This way the coverlet, another way the sheets;

 

This way the covers, another way the sheets;

 

Ay, and amid this hurly I intend

 

Yes, and among this chaos I will make it seem

 

That all is done in reverend care of her;

 

That all this is because I want to take good care of her;

 

And, in conclusion, she shall watch all night:

 

And, in conclusion, she shall be awake all night:

 

And if she chance to nod I'll rail and brawl,

 

And if she starts to fall asleep I'll yell and holler,

 

And with the clamour keep her still awake.

 

And with the noise keep her awake still.

 

This is a way to kill a wife with kindness;

And thus I'll curb her mad and headstrong humour.

 

And this is how I will stop her crazy and stubborn ways,

 

He that knows better how to tame a shrew,

 

He that has a better idea of how to tame a shrew,

 

Now let him speak; 'tis charity to show.

 

Now let him speak; I would consider it a favor.

 

[Exit.]

 

 

Padua. Before BAPTISTA'S house

 

[Enter TRANIO and HORTENSIO.]

TRANIO. Is 't possible, friend Licio, that Mistress Bianca

 

Is it possible, my friend Licio, that Miss Bianca

 

Doth fancy any other but Lucentio?

 

Has a fondness for anyone other than Lucentio?

 

I tell you, sir, she bears me fair in hand.

 

I tell you, sir, she likes me very much.

 

HORTENSIO. Sir, to satisfy you in what I have said,

 

Sir, to see the proof of what I have said,

 

Stand by and mark the manner of his teaching.

 

Stand by and watch the way he teaches.

 

[They stand aside.]

 

[Enter BIANCA and LUCENTIO.]

 

LUCENTIO. Now, mistress, profit you in what you read?

 
 

Now, miss, are you benefiting by what you read?

 

BIANCA. What, master, read you,

 

What, master, you read,

 

First resolve me that.

 

LUCENTIO. I read that I profess, the Art to Love.

 
 

I read what I feel, the Art to Love.

 

BIANCA. And may you prove, sir, master of your art!

 
 

And may you turn out, sir, to be master of your art!

 

LUCENTIO. While you, sweet dear, prove mistress of my heart.

 
 

While you, sweet dear, turn out to be the lady of my heart.

 

[They retire.]

 

HORTENSIO. Quick proceeders, marry!

 

Fast-moving lovers, indeed!

 

Now tell me, I pray,

 

Now tell me, please,

 

You that durst swear that your Mistress Bianca

 

You that dared to swear that your Miss Bianca

 

Lov'd none in the world so well as Lucentio.

 

Did not love anyone in the world as much as Lucentio.

 

TRANIO. O despiteful love! unconstant womankind!

 

Oh, spiteful love! Unfaithful womankind!

 

 I tell thee, Licio, this is wonderful.

 

I tell you, Licio, this astonishes me.

 

HORTENSIO. Mistake no more; I am not Licio.

 

Make no mistake; I am not Licio.

 

Nor a musician as I seem to be;

But one that scorn to live in this disguise

 

But one that resents living in this disguise

 

For such a one as leaves a gentleman

And makes a god of such a cullion:

 

And makes a god of such a lowly person;

 

Know, sir, that I am call'd Hortensio.

 

TRANIO. Signior Hortensio, I have often heard

 

Sir Hortensio, I have often heard

 

Of your entire affection to Bianca;

 

Of your deep affection for Bianca;

 

And since mine eyes are witness of her lightness,

 

And since my eyes have witnessed her unfaithfulness,

 

I will with you, if you be so contented,

 

I will with you, if you wish,

 

Forswear Bianca and her love for ever.

 

Give up Bianca and her love forever.

 

HORTENSIO. See, how they kiss and court! Signior Lucentio,

Here is my hand, and here I firmly vow

 

Here is my hand, and here I firmly promise

 

Never to woo her more, but do forswear her,

 

Never to woo her again, but give her up,

 

As one unworthy all the former favours

 

As one unworthy of all the former favors

That I have fondly flatter'd her withal.

 

That I had fondly flattered her with before.

 

TRANIO. And here I take the like unfeigned oath,

 

And here I make the same not-faked promise,

 

Never to marry with her though she would entreat;

 

Never to marry her even if she begged me;

 

Fie on her! See how beastly she doth court him!

 

Enough with her! See how terrible she is!

 

HORTENSIO. Would all the world but he had quite forsworn!

 

If only all the world except him had given her up!

 

For me, that I may surely keep mine oath,

 

For me, so I may surely keep my promise,

 

I will be married to a wealtlly widow

 

I will be married to a wealthy widow

 

Ere three days pass, which hath as long lov'd me

 

Before three days pass, who has loved me for as long

 

As I have lov'd this proud disdainful haggard.

 

As I have loved this proud, stuck-up woman.

 

And so farewell, Signior Lucentio.

Kindness in women, not their beauteous looks,

 

Kindness in women, not their beautiful appearance,

 

Shall win my love; and so I take my leave,

 

Shall win my love; and so I will leave now,

 

In resolution as I swore before.

 

Resolved as I promised before.

 

[Exit HORTENSIO. LUCENTIO and BIANCA advance.]

 

TRANIO. Mistress Bianca, bless you with such grace

 

Miss Bianca, bless you with such luck

 

As 'longeth to a lover's blessed case!

 

As belong to a lover's blessed case!

 

Nay, I have ta'en you napping, gentle love,

 

I have surprised you, gentle love,

 
 

And have forsworn you with Hortensio.

 

And have given you up with Hortensio.

 

BIANCA. Tranio, you jest; but have you both forsworn me?

 

Tranio, you're kidding; but have you both given me up?

 

TRANIO. Mistress, we have.

 

LUCENTIO. Then we are rid of Licio.

 

TRANIO. I' faith, he'll have a lusty widow now,

 

By my faith, he'll have an energetic widow now,

 

That shall be woo'd and wedded in a day.

 

That shall be wooed and married in a day.

 

BIANCA. God give him joy!

 

TRANIO. Ay, and he'll tame her.

 
 

Yes, and he'll tame her.

 

BIANCA. He says so, Tranio.

 

TRANIO. Faith, he is gone unto the taming-school.

 
 

Faith, he has gone to the taming-school.

 

BIANCA. The taming-school! What, is there such a place?

 

TRANIO. Ay, mistress; and Petruchio is the master,

 

Yes, miss; and Petruchio is the teacher,

 

That teacheth tricks eleven and twenty long,

 

That teaches many kinds of tricks,

 

To tame a shrew and charm her chattering tongue.

 

To tame a shrew and calm her excessive chatter.

 

[Enter BIONDELLO, running.]

 

BIONDELLO. O master, master! I have watch'd so long

 

Oh master, master! I have watched so long

 

That I am dog-weary; but at last I spied

 

That I am exhausted; but at last I noticed

 

 

An ancient angel coming down the hill

 

An elderly gentleman coming down the hill

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