The Deal, the Dance, and the Devil (29 page)

Before I got to the door, Shay-Shaunté said, “Evia, quitting is not a good idea.” I kept moving until her next words stopped me cold. “If you leave, I will sue you, and then where will you and your children and your mother-in-law and your mother … and even Adam … be?

It wasn’t her threat that got me. It was what she knew about my family. Had Adam, my private husband, shared our personal life with her?

“Look,” Shay-Shaunté began, “just make this easy on yourself. We have a legal deal. I’ve paid all the money, and not only did you agree verbally, you signed a contract and cashed the checks—both of them.”

I inhaled.

“So,” she stood and walked toward me.

I didn’t know why I felt the need to back up, but I did. Until I hit the wall and had nowhere else to go.

Just inches separated us when she said, “Let’s just keep it the way we decided. Six months. Or … you can work hard and find someone else for me and get out of here before then.” She spoke in a tone that sounded like we were two friends who’d had a little disagreement.

“Okay?” She smiled.

I didn’t move a muscle.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” she said. “Because face it. You can’t go anywhere.”

I stared at her for a moment longer before I grabbed the door handle and stomped out. As I passed Rachel’s desk, she whispered, “Did she tell you anything about her birthday?”

I didn’t say a word. All I had to do was hold on until I got into my own little space.

Inside my office, I closed the door quickly. Held in my emotions until I got to my desk. Then I leaned over, held my head, and cried.

Chapter 48

T
HE CLOCK STRUCK MIDNIGHT.

Okay, that was a slight exaggeration—it was only five, but it felt like midnight. Really, my first day back at Ferossity felt like a month of midnights.

There was too much contact, that was the problem. I should’ve put yet another addendum in the contract—that after the deal, after the dance, there would be no direct contact with the devil.

But this was just another point that I hadn’t thought through, so now I had to face Shay-Shaunté every minute of the day, it seemed. It was bad enough that I had to work with the woman who was cheating me; now I had to look into her eyes and know that she’d cheated with my husband.

I knew it wasn’t exactly cheating. I mean, how could it be cheating when I knew about it and had approved? But it felt like cheating all day long. Every time I looked at Shay-Shaunté, I thought about Adam.

It had started this morning, as I’d sat in my office, still stunned at the revelation that Shay-Shaunté was shorting us two million dollars. I’d called Adam over and over, left message after message. But my calls had gone straight to his voice mail, and he’d never called back. Making me still wonder what kind of run he’d had to do this morning.

While I’d sat wondering, Shay-Shaunté had sauntered into my office as if life was grand.

“Do you have the résumé of the intern we selected? I want to send out a newsletter.”

I’d sat staring, mesmerized by her ruby-colored lips, wondering why I hadn’t paid more attention to them before. Their perfect shape, perfect size, plump on the bottom, full on top.

“Evia?”

She’d interrupted my scrutiny by repeating her question. But it had been hard to hear Shay-Shaunté when all I’d been able to do was think about how many times those lips had touched my husband.

I’d coughed to make sure that my voice came out strong. “I have the résumé right here.” I’d passed her a manila folder, then studied her soft, flawless hands. The hands of a model in a lotion or anti-aging commercial. And I’d wondered what those long, slender fingers had done with my husband.

She’d strutted away, swayed, all slither, all sex, her sensuality almost spellbinding. All I’d been able to think about were Adam’s eyes on her body; I hadn’t had the guts to think about what other parts of him had touched her.

Today, I died a thousand times; every time Shay-Shaunté came into my office, or I passed her in the hallway, or I heard her talking to Rachel with a new joy, I passed away again. But then the clock struck quitting time and I was set free.

With my coat on my arm, my purse on my shoulder, and my shoes in my hands, I raced to the stairwell. I cringed as I
thought about going down twelve flights in my stocking feet, but what else was I supposed to do? The moment I was furloughed, I had to get away from Shay-Shaunté—aching feet and all.

Which made the thought of returning tomorrow beyond intolerable. How could I come here another day just to die another death?

Adam was going to have to figure this out for me. Whatever he had to do, he had to get me out of here. After all, after what he’d done this weekend, he owed me that much.

There were so many things to talk to Adam about—how Shay-Shaunté was cheating us out of millions, how she’d tortured me throughout the day, how I just didn’t see how I’d be able to continue working. But the anxiety I’d had all day, along with the jam-packed, rush-hour ride home, added up to one sistah with a serious attitude. Then, combined with the fact that when I walked through the door Adam didn’t make a single move to greet me, my boiling blood took me to new levels of pissitivity.

So in that moment I didn’t go through the agenda; I didn’t think about what would be the best issue to bring to Adam first.

Instead, when I saw my husband sitting in the living room, reading the newspaper, with his cell phone next to him (the cell that I’d been calling all day), all I could say was, “Where did you go this morning?”

Not a hello, how’re you doing, nothing. I just gave it to him straight, no chaser, with total attitude.

Adam looked up, and the tracks on his forehead told me that he had no idea what I was talking about. But that wasn’t going to stop me—I wanted answers. I wanted to know if our deal had turned into their affair.

“Hey!” he said softly, smoothly, as if he was trying to defuse the explosion he felt looming. His eyes roamed over me, inch by inch, and I knew that my outfit surprised him. He said, “You look nice.”

I wasn’t going to let him distract me. Isn’t that what cheaters always did? I didn’t know for sure because Adam had never cheated before.

“Where did you go this morning?” I repeated, letting him know that we were going to deal with this, now.

“What?” Adam asked, putting down the newspaper.

How many times did he want me to repeat what I’d asked? So I tried it a different way. Rephrased the question and slowed it down like I was talking to a two-year-old. “When you left us this morning, while the kids were having breakfast, where did you go?”

His eyes blinked, as if he was still confused. But I knew the real deal—he was stalling, trying to come up with a good lie.

He said, “This morning?” Looked down, then back up at me. Said, “I went to Marilyn’s.”

I frowned. “My mother?”

“Yes. I wanted to talk to Cashmere … and Marilyn about what happened to Ethan.”

“You went there this morning.” It wasn’t really a question; this was an interrogation, so I stated what he wanted me to believe as fact.

“Yeah. Where did you think I went?”

My lips pressed together. I was not going to say her name.

But he did. “Shay-Shaunté. Is that what you thought?”

My answer was my folded arms and silence.

He shook his head, but he didn’t get a chance to say anything more because the twins busted through the door.

“Daddy!” The two pushed past me as if I was not chopped, but chewed-up, liver.

But then my mini-me hit reverse, and she came back across the room and made me feel not so invisible. “Hi, Mom.” She hugged me.

The girls were wearing giant smiles. A good day at school.

That’s what they told Adam when he asked about their day. Then he told them to get their homework done so that we could talk about their party.

“No homework today, Daddy,” Alana said.

Alexa explained, “The teachers always give us a break the first day, as if they know our bodies are back on Monday but our brains won’t join us till Tuesday.”

Three people in the room laughed.

Adam asked, “So, you guys wanna start some of it now?”

“Yeah,” the girls cheered and led him up the stairs.

I studied Adam as he followed the twins. Studied his movements, thought about his explanation.

So, he’d been with my mother. It made sense—I guessed. Except—it didn’t make sense. Why would he go over there without me? And if he had, why hadn’t he just told me where he was going this morning?

Naw, he was lying. And I wasn’t going to be one of those wives who believed anything. Adam was going to tell me the truth!

Then I remembered something that Brooklyn once told me—that M-A-N stood for Men Admit Nothing. So I didn’t go upstairs and drag Adam back down, demanding that he tell me everything. No, I was gonna have to find out the truth my own way.

I already had my plan, but I waited until Ethan came home, since I didn’t want to be interrupted. Then I checked on Adam and the girls, upstairs inside that shroud of pink.

“Mom, you should stay,” Alana encouraged.

“I’ll be part of the planning, don’t worry,” I said, glancing at Adam, who was sprawled out on the floor with his back against the bed. Good—he looked like he would be there for a while. “But right now, I’m gonna get dinner started.”

“Okay,” the girls chorused.

I waited for Adam to say something, and when he didn’t, I just walked out. That was okay; I didn’t have anything to say to him either. Not until I handed his lie right back to him.

In sixteen years of marriage, I couldn’t remember another day when I’d carried anger—and so much of it—for more than a couple of hours. That was what, I believed, made our marriage so special.

But that was then.

Downstairs, I grabbed my cell from my purse, then slipped into our bedroom. I almost wanted to have a glass of wine or something before I dialed this number. But I didn’t need a drink; fury drove me to do what I had to do.

“Hey, Marilyn,” I said as soon as my mother answered.

“Oh, Lawd, what you want?”

I shook my head, not believing that those five words were the way my mother chose to greet me.

Before I could tell her why I’d dialed her number, she said, “Don’t tell me you’re callin’ to go off, too.”

I frowned. “What?”

“I still cannot believe the way Adam came at me this morning. Messed up my whole day. Didn’t Ruby teach him any kind of manners?”

If this call was about anything else, I wouldn’t have let her talk about my mother-in-love that way. “So Adam was over there? This morning?”

“Don’t act like you don’t know. Hmph, coming over here,
waking me up, talkin’ like he owns me just ’cause you guys give me a little bit of change every blue moon.”

I needed this to be clear. “So, Adam came over there, this morning?”

“Ain’t that what I just said? You know, I’m tired of y’all disrespecting me like this. I am still the mother. You are still the child.”

I rolled my eyes. Now that I had what I’d called for, I didn’t need to listen to Marilyn’s rampage.

But she went on. “So, if you can’t treat me the way I’m supposed to be treated, then just keep your bougie behinds over there and leave me alone.”

She slammed down the phone so hard that I had to pull my cell away from my ear. But at least she’d given me what I needed to know.

I pressed End. “So, Adam wasn’t lying,” I whispered.

“Did you
really
think that I was?”

I didn’t even want to turn around. How had this happened? I hadn’t felt him, like I always had. Hadn’t known he’d been anywhere near me, like I always had.

Now I was the one stalling, trying to come up with a good lie. But since I didn’t know how much he’d heard, I had to go with the truth.

Facing him, I could see there was nothing but hurt on his face, and I wished that I could take back my doubt.

He took a step forward, then stopped as if he didn’t want to get too close. “How could you go behind me like that?”

“I just … I needed to know.”

“I told you what you needed to know.”

I shook my head. “But it was just so weird, the way you and Shay-Shaunté used the same words today. She said she had to make a run. And that’s what you said, too.”

He frowned. “So, two people can’t make a run?”

“It was more than that. It’s everything—like the way I called you all day and you never answered.”

“My phone is dead and I can’t find my charger. I was waiting for you to come home so that I could use yours.” He held up his hand, and for the first time, I noticed that he was holding his cell. “That’s why I came downstairs. To get your charger.”

I grabbed my purse, digging inside for the charger and giving myself time to find better words. When I handed the cord to him, I said, “Baby, I’m sorry. It’s just that since you came home … you’re so mysterious.”

He frowned, as if he had no idea what I was talking about. “I guess everything is mysterious when you’re suspicious.”

“I don’t mean to be, but you’ve got to know that things aren’t the same between us.”

“But things aren’t so different that I would lie to you.” He looked down when he said, “I can’t believe you did that, Evia.”

I swallowed a mouthful of air. It was a simple word, a simple name. My name. But it was like a punch to my gut. Evia. I couldn’t remember the last time he’d spoken my name.

From the day we were married, I’d always been Shine. His Shine. His sunshine! What happened to that?

I would’ve asked him, but he turned around and, with the charger in his hand, walked out of the room.

Chapter 49

I
DIDN’T RECOGNIZE ANY PART OF
my life. I wasn’t the same woman, Adam wasn’t the same man, and this definitely wasn’t the same marriage.

After Adam left me alone to think about what I’d done, he didn’t speak another word to me. He didn’t even sit down to dinner with us, telling the children, in a voice loud enough for me to hear, that he had to make a run.

It was all that I could do not to ask him where he was going. And for the time that he was away, it was all that I could do not to wonder if he was with Shay-Shaunté.