The Disappearance of Ember Crow (14 page)

“I’m not Terence.”

“You keep saying that. And I’ll give you this, you do a good job of sounding human.” He fixed me with a hard stare. “But in the end, you’re a collection of circuits, and you don’t actually have a heart. Why should I trust you, Red?”

A flood of words rushed into my mouth, waiting to be spoken.
You should trust me because I see the best of what you could be, just as someone once saw it in me … because I will not yield you to Terence, not your body nor your soul …

Because in all the ways that matter, I do have a heart
.

I wanted to shout all of that out, as if by doing so I could prove to Jules, and the world, that I was better than I might seem. I didn’t. He wouldn’t believe any of it.

“You can think what you like of me,” I said. My voice was shaking. I steadied it and continued, “But we both know that you’re worried that you’ve become more of a liability to Terence than an asset. Or you would never have risked waking me with that neutraliser, which I am betting you are not even supposed to have.” I gave him a fierce smile, a warrior’s smile. It was an expression I’d borrowed from Ash. “The way I see it, I’m your only option for escape. So,
sweetheart
, I guess you’ll just have to decide if I’m a good bet.”

He sat there for a second longer. Then he stalked out, slamming the door behind him.

THE MINIONS

Day passed into night. Jules returned periodically, but only to offer me more food, which I refused. I tried to talk to him; he wouldn’t listen. By the time dawn came again, I was beginning to wonder if I should confess that I didn’t actually need what was in the bottle to get rid of the rhondarite. In a few more days I would have purged the stuff myself, thanks to a series of secret alterations Dad and I had made to my systems. Except if I shared that information with Jules, he might panic and inject me with rhondarite again. Or shoot me, and either way, I’d lose my chance to save him.

The train began to slow. I shifted to stare out the window. We were rolling past buildings that were made of composite and covered with vines.
Fern City
. Assuming Jules had left Gull City immediately after the rally, it had been ten days since I’d met him; that was how long it took to get here by Rail. Eventually we pulled into a station crowded with king-ferns, their long stems curling upwards into huge, delicate fronds that arched high above the people on the platform. Fern City was perennially overgrown; it was being gradually swallowed by the surrounding Deepwood. The situation was partly my fault, because I’d helped to choose the site for Fern City, hundreds of years ago when the Deepwood was mere saplings. No one could have predicted how fast and how ferociously that forest would grow once the world’s ecosystems stabilised in the years following the Reckoning. There was an ongoing debate in the government here about which of two possible alternatives for the future of the city was more harmful to the Balance: maintaining it where it was – which meant constantly cutting back the vegetation – or establishing it anew outside the forest.

I watched the people milling about. Then I heard sounds: a door swinging open, and voices. Someone was coming into this carriage. Into the government carriage, to which Jules had no doubt arranged exclusive access. Whoever it was couldn’t be a random stranger.

Pulse racing, I hurried to the door and pressed my ear to it. Technically, Jules had been right when he said I didn’t have a heart, but the fact that there was an energy core in my chest didn’t prevent me from experiencing the sensation of a heart pounding in panic. I could make out a murmur of voices, too low or too distant to distinguish words. Frowning, I concentrated on extending the range of my hearing. Dad had made certain that none of us could push our senses too far beyond normal human capacity, but I only needed a small boost.

The murmurs crystallised into words. A girl, saying,“I
said
, obedience is service.”

“And I don’t believe in that crap, and never have.”
Jules
. “You think I’ve suddenly became a convert since the last time we met? I don’t change, darling.”

Someone else spoke – male, and disdainful. “Obedience is service, and service is redemption. You are not worthy to serve.”

“Maybe not, but at least I’m capable of having an original idea. Or haven’t you figured out there’s a reason you minions are never sent on missions that require improvisation?”

The boy started to respond. The girl spoke over the top of him. “Don’t let him bait you. We’ve been sent to retrieve your cargo, Jules. We’ll be taking her from here.”

“Oh yeah? Where to?”

“That is not your concern.”

They were moving in this direction. I hurried back to the bed, closing my eyes and feigning unconsciousness. My thoughts travelled in circles, running in panic. I couldn’t be taken, not yet. Not before I’d helped Jules, and not before I’d sent a message to Ash. But I wasn’t going to be able to fight them with the rhondarite still in my system.

The door opened, and Jules spoke. “See? She’s totally out, just like I said.”

The girl answered, “Perhaps. But we were told to be sure.”

There was a familiar sizzling sound, and then nothing.

THE CRASH

I opened my eyes onto blackness, with no grasp of how long I’d been out. I was somewhere dark and enclosed. I felt around the space, my fingers brushing over smooth, hard surfaces.

They’d put me in a box.

This was bad, even for Terence. I imagined myself locked forever in this airless prison.
Don’t be absurd
. He hadn’t gone to so much trouble to find me only to shut me away, and it wasn’t like this would kill me. While I did breathe, it wasn’t because I required air; it was yet another refinement my father had introduced to make us as human as possible. I wasn’t going to suffocate.

That really should have made me feel much better than it did.

I pushed against the lid. It was unyielding, locked down tight. I wondered if Jules had helped them load me in after he’d let them shoot me. What would he do now? Return to following Terence’s orders, and search for another way to escape? Perhaps he thought he could find the antidote, and start stockpiling it …
Stop thinking about Jules
. It wasn’t useful, and it hurt the heart he didn’t believe I had.

Where was I now? There was a sense of motion, almost the same as on the train, but a little bumpier.
I’m in a car? Truck?
It had to be a truck, otherwise it wouldn’t be big enough to hold the container that I was trapped in. I was being taken somewhere, by the people who’d come onto the train.
Cloud City?

There was an old highway that ran to Cloud City, and it would get you there from Fern City considerably faster than the Rail, provided you had a vehicle. It wasn’t used much, because all the vehicles were owned by the government and even they tended to avoid this road. It ran through the Deepwood and was always partially covered with vegetation. The governments of Cloud City and Fern City had a joint clearing program, but they never did manage to keep up with the growth of the forest.
If we’re on the highway, Terence must have a reason for wanting me in Cloud City as fast as possible
. Was that where he was? Had his plan changed, or had he not trusted Jules with the real destination?

I had no way to determine the answers to any of that from inside this box. I glared uselessly up at the lid. My only advantage was that no one would expect me to be awake yet; my body had adapted to the effects of the weapon, counteracting it in the same way I could counteract rhondarite. I didn’t know how close we were to Cloud City, but when someone finally opened my container, I wouldn’t be completely at their mercy.

Gradually, I became aware of a sound from outside. A rumbling noise, growing louder and louder. It took me a moment to identify it as another vehicle. A very large vehicle, rapidly approaching. It roared closer, and there was a sudden lurch as something slammed into the side of the truck. The container skidded to the side, and I flung out my hands to brace myself. Tires screeched, and there was another tremendous reverberation.

Then my prison was airborne.

There was precisely enough time for me to comprehend how much landing was going to hurt before the container crashed back to earth. It bounced along, throwing me back and forth. When it stopped moving I lay still, dazed and in an immense amount of pain. My head felt like it had been cracked open, my leg and stomach screamed in agony, and there was a white hot stabbing every time I breathed, as if a rib was digging into a lung. If I’d been organic, I would have had broken bones, internal injuries, and a concussion. I wasn’t actually damaged, but that made no difference to what I felt. Dad had always believed that in order to truly understand human frailty, it was important to experience it.

I endured, biting into my lip to stop myself from screaming until the pain began to ease. As it ebbed, I realised I could hear shouting from outside the box. Were they coming for me? The lid had buckled under the impact of the crash, enough for me to see light in places. I threw myself against it. Once, and again. It gave way, and I tumbled out into the humid air of the Deepwood.

Brushing dirt off my face, I pushed myself to my feet and looked around. I was standing at the bottom of a steep embankment, surrounded by ferns of various sizes, and loomed over by ylang-ylang trees. There was a truck in front of me, turned on its side with its wheels spinning in the air. Someone was lying beside it, half-concealed in the dense foliage. I stumbled over and found myself gazing into the blank stare of a slim, freckled boy. My mind registered details:
dressed in enforcer-black … must have been thrown from the truck when it crashed … head cracked open
. One of the “minions”, as Jules had called them? But where was the other one?

There was a sizzling sound from somewhere above. The weapon! I crawled up the steep embankment and peered over the top. Another,
much
bigger truck was sitting in the middle of the deserted road. Beyond that was a tall, dark-haired girl, also dressed as an enforcer, pacing along the far side of the road. She was staring into the forest, and holding the weapon in her hand.

“How far do you think you’re going to get, Jules?” she yelled. “Riley hurt you pretty bad. And when I find you …” She picked up a rock from the ground and crushed it, sending it crumbling into dust. “I might not even bother to shoot you.”

She was a Strongarm, and Jules was in trouble. I climbed over the top of the rise and crept towards her. I was halfway there when she abruptly raised the weapon, pointing it at something in the forest. She’d spotted Jules, and a hit from that thing would kill an organic being.

“Hey!” I shouted.

The girl spun around, firing without hesitation, and barely missed me. I scrambled for the shelter of the truck. She raised the weapon to fire again, and Jules came flying out of the forest, slamming into her.

The weapon clattered across the road. I ran for it as she fought with Jules, aiming a punch at his face. He dodged just in time – a Strongarm hit would cave his skull in – and rolled to the side. But his movements were awkward and slow.
He’s injured
.

The girl grasped hold of his shoulders and flung him away from her. Then she stalked to his side, standing over him and pulling back her fist to strike.

I grabbed the weapon. “Stop!”

She looked at me. Her lips curled into a contemptuous smile. “You won’t hurt me. I know all about you. You
can’t
.”

Terence had told her that? Her fist started to descend. Jules stirred, but he wasn’t going to be able to get out of the way in time.

“Stop!”
Don’t make me do this
. “Please stop!”

She ignored me.

I fired.

Orange energy arced out and tore into her, hurling her back into the Deepwood. It was a clean shot; there was not the smallest possibility that she had survived it. I waited. One second. Two. Three … and agony ripped through my body.

The weapon fell from my hand as I collapsed. The only thing I could hear above my own screams was my father’s voice, roaring in my mind:
no killing no killing, nokillingnokillingnokillingnokilling …

I had to do it!
I shouted back inside my head.
It was to save someone else. It was the only way, I promise, I promise …

The wracking pain seemed to last for hours before it finally began to ease. Someone was speaking, sounding frantic. “Red. Red! What’s happening? Tell me how I can help you.”

Jules was crouched over me. I struggled up, grabbing hold of the front of his shirt, and whispered, “Say that I saved you.”

“Of course you saved me.”

“I’m not like Terence. I’m not. I’m not, I’m not …”

He pulled me to him, cradling me in his arms. “You’re
nothing
like him. You saved my life, Red.”

I closed my eyes and clung to Jules as if he were the only real thing in the world. He continued to speak, repeating the same thing, over and over – “You saved me. You saved me.”
I saved Jules. I did
. The more I believed it, the more the pain diminished, getting smaller and smaller until it was finally gone.

I stirred, and gazed up at him. He looked so terrified that I almost laughed. It must have been horrible to go to so much trouble to rescue the one person who could help him, only to have me appear to go crazy.

“I’m all right.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.” I closed my eyes again, resting against him for a single, indulgent moment. Then I pushed him away, forcing myself to my feet. “We can’t stay here. Have to get … somewhere safe.”

Everything was moving back and forth.
I’m swaying
. Jules rose, and bent to grab the weapon, before putting an arm around my waist and helping me over to the truck.

“I’ve got somewhere we can go,” he said. “Back in Fern City.”

He lifted me into the passenger seat, and walked around to the driver’s side.

“Do you think we should bury them?” I asked, as he climbed in. “To hide them, or … out of respect?”