The Embers Of My Heart (41 page)

Max spoke up again. "You were around when he was? That makes you a lot older than I thought."

A ripple of chuckles echoed around the room as Absynthe gave Max a look that could have reduced him to dust. "Returning to the reason I brought them here. It's painfully obvious now that we can't protect you, your friends, and maintain our other duties."

"Is that a warning to be even more careful?"

"No, it's something more." Absynthe stopped and looked out over the group. "I'm sorry. Any of you who want to leave now, please do. I'm about to commit treason, real treason, something we can't justify."

"We already agreed to this," one of the agents sitting on a couch said. "We're behind this idea, all of us."

"Don't hesitate," said another agent.

She took a deep breath and turned to me. "Kevin, please do something important for me. Please contact your uncle as soon as possible and pass along this message? Alex misses him, and she needs his help."

Chapter Twenty Seven

Max and I were late to our traditional gathering. Jess took the opportunity to scold him mercilessly. Some things remained the same. Andreas passed a glass to me, delicious homebrew as always. We took seats around his table. A single glass, overturned, sat alone in front of the empty chair between Drew and Jess.

"Congratulations to everyone on completing another trimester." Andreas lifted his glass and we all followed his lead. "I hope to see you all again, come the new year."

"Are you leaving?" Drew asked.

"No. I am returning home for the holiday. I have not been home since my first year here. My family is excited. I will admit, returning home for a short time will be invigorating."

"So you're pining for the fjords?" Max asked. Jess rolled her eyes and sighed loudly.

"Skiing," Andreas said.

"What about the reindeer?" Max continued his harassment. "Have you missed them too?"

"Only my pet reindeer."

"You have a pet reindeer? No shit?"

Andreas smiled. "No, Max. I am fucking with you."

He took the round of laughter with good grace. "Well, I'm sticking around here on campus this winter. I've been blowing off too many classes and I'd like to actually graduate at some point. Too bad you won't be around, Andreas. I was looking forward to testing any winter beers you came up with."

"He'll be too busy freezing," Kaitlyn said. Her eyes looked at each person around the table, except for me. "I'll be home again. Still warm out in California, nothing like these horrible New York winters!"

"Poor baby," Jess said.

"I am a poor baby! Look at me! I'm so pale!" She thrust her arm out to the center of the table, barely missing her glass. Her arm was still several shades darker than anyone else's.

"You're still tan. I don't know how. Were you out sunning on the roof in forty degree weather?"

"There are such things as tanning salons," Drew pointed out.

"I want to be tan, not cooked," Kaitlyn said. "I'm just going to be so pale compared to everyone else when I go home. It's depressing!"

"So don't go home," Jess said. "Stay on campus with this idiot."

"But it's so cold!"

Jess grinned. "Quit your bitching, sister. You're giving me a headache."

Both of them started giggling. I looked to Max, who shrugged. Some inside joke, no doubt. "Drew, what are your plans?" Andreas asked.

Drew took a mouthful of beer before answering. "I'm going home. Just home. I need a bit of time to myself, get away from here for a while. Time to think. You know."

I knew. We all knew. Jess spoke up before the silence could drag. "I'm off home too, but I've got a two week project contract waiting for me. I guess my dad knows a guy, who knows a guy, or something like that. It'll give me some spending money for Christmas, plus it'll look good on the resume. I'll have to bust ass to get it done by the deadline. That means don't expect a lot of phone calls, Max."

"You're the one who flips if I don't call you," he said.

"Yeah, well, I'll be busy."

"Fine, I didn't want to talk to you in the future anyways."

"Don't get sassy with me." Jess looked in my direction. "How about you, glowstick?"

"Glowstick?"

"It's a joke. I'm teasing you. Laugh."

I forced a smile. "Same as Max. Staying over the break, taking a course to try and get my shit together."

"You two are going to get some nice private time with Drew gone," Jess said. "Don't get too kinky, all right?"

"Oh shut up. Kevin's not even that cute."

"I resent that," I said. "It's not like you're pretty either."

"Children," Drew said. "Stop fighting."

I let the conversation drift. I didn't want to get into any details. I hadn't even told my dad that I wasn't coming home for the break yet. I wanted to head home for Christmas, especially since I had missed Thanksgiving, but that depended on the security situation. Shade and his crew of assholes would obviously be waiting for me to get home and hit me while I was far away from help. I'd have to run the idea past Absynthe and see what happened. The option of running to Seattle crossed my mind.

Andreas stood up, silencing the conversation. He produced a bottle of crystal blue liquor that had never failed to ruin someone's night. "Someone should have a shot," he announced. "For tradition."

"I've tried it twice already," Max said. "I'm going to pass this time. For real. I'd like to function tomorrow."

No one else spoke up as Andreas poured the shot. He looked at each of us in turn before shrugging. "If no one else, I shall take it."

"You've never tried it yourself?"

"No, but I have noted that you enjoyed it."

"Enjoy? That's definitely not the right word."

Andreas reached for the shot, but Kaitlyn snatched it from in front of him, spilling a little bit of it on the table. I half expected it to etch the surface on contact. "Someone's got to save you from yourself," she said. "Can't be any worse than some of the other shots I've had."

"This should be good," Max said.

Kaitlyn made a face at him before downing the shot in a single smooth motion. She frowned and shook her head. "That's a strange aftertaste. I think. My mouth is numb."

"I thought I fixed that," Andreas said. "How do you feel?"

"Fine? You should pour me another." She reached for the bottle and slid sideways out of her chair.

After a momentary group panic, Andreas hoisted her up and carried her into his bedroom to sleep it off. Max shuddered. "She's going to be wishing for death tomorrow," he said.

"Hey, Kev," Drew said. "Slide that over, would you?"

"That stuff? Sure, I guess." I pushed the blue bottle over toward him. "You sure you want to risk it?"

"It's not for me." He flipped the upturned glass over and poured three fingers of the blue liquor into it. He raised the glass into the air briefly, then set it back down. "It's for her."

I raised my glass in unison with the others. "To Lisa."

We drank in silence. No one spoke until Andreas emerged from his bedroom. "She is resting peacefully," he announced.

"She sure is," Drew said. He stood up. "Sorry, guys. I have to go pack. See you next year." His walk away from the table was slow and heavy. All of us watched him go. I wanted to say something, do something, but I couldn't come up with anything that'd mean a damn thing to him. The door shut behind him and we all exchanged looks.

"Well," Max said. "Jess, dear, since your roommate is sleeping here tonight, are you going to mind if I crash in your room? I think he wants to be alone for a while."

Jess put her hand on his. "I think you're right. It's a good idea."

Max turned his hand up and their fingers laced together. "Shit. Too much."

I couldn't help but laugh. All eyes snapped to me. "Sorry. It's just nice to see you two aren't pretending nothing's going on anymore."

"It was fun while it lasted," Jess said.

"Speak for yourself. I hated it."

"Really?"

"Why wouldn't I want the world to be jealous of me?" Max asked.

Jess narrowed her eyes at him. "I don't know if there's a hidden insult lurking there."

Max shook his head. "I'm rather fond of you, you know."

"Are you actually being sweet to me?" Jess stood up, but Max didn't let go of her hand. "Who are you and what did you do with my boyfriend?"

Max stood up. His face was uncharacteristically serious. "You know, a lot of shit's gone down lately, and I realized I don't want to let the little things go. If things go to hell, I don't want to regret a single moment I've spent with you, and I'm not hiding the fact I love you anymore."

Jess's face turned nearly as red as her hair. "Damn you, Max. I wanted to be the first one to say it." She stepped toward him, paused, and looked over at Andreas and me. "And I didn't want it in front of witnesses."

"Tough. Deal with it."

She sighed and pointed at the two of us with her free hand. "If you go telling everyone, I swear, it's the end for you. I'll make you live to regret all the horrible things you've ever done."

"Sure, Jess," I said. "You big softie, you."

"God dammit." She pulled Max toward the door. "You two have a good winter break. Fuckers."

Andreas and I shared a grin as they left. "About time," he said.

"I know."

"I would offer you the couch tonight," he said.

"I know. I'll figure something out." I held a hand out toward him and we shook. "Enjoy your skiing and stay safe."

"You as well," he said.

I wandered outside. The furious cold of an upstate New York winter hit me in the face with all the subtlety of a freight train. It was well past midnight. I sat on the bench and used a quick thread of my power to heat my body up for a little while. Last year, I had walked out of our get-together, argued with Nikki, met with Star, and fought Shade. In a way, this day was the anniversary of the start of my downfall. I'd made a fateful decision that night.

Did I regret it? My choice led directly to Lisa's death. It led to putting my friends in danger. I had made that decision without knowing what I did now. If I had known I was a breeding project, a tool of the Establishment, would I have made the same decision?

Yes. I retrieved my burner phone from its hiding place. I would have made the same decision, even knowing the cost. The Establishment was using me. I needed to dig deeper and find what Alistair's endgame was. My fingers danced across her number and she picked up a moment later. "Ugh. It's late."

"Sorry," I said. "It's even later here."

"You're interrupting my beauty sleep."

"You're beautiful even when you don't get any sleep."

"Now you're being sweet. You need something, don't you?"

"Besides you in my arms?"

She giggled. "You're buttering me up here, Kevin. It must be pretty big."

"I need to talk to Todd."

"Sure. You didn't need to go through all that just to talk to him, not that I mind. Hang on a minute and I'll bring him in on the line."

"You can't just give me his number?"

"Operational security, my love." She laughed and the line went quiet. I waited for over a minute before the line clicked. "Still there?"

"Still here, still freezing," I said.

"I always did hate the cold." My uncle's voice was on the line. "How are you, Kevin?"

"Terrified, to be honest." I filled them both in on the attack. Todd groaned as I finished the story. "So now I'm scared for myself and my friends."

"An enemy operative should never have gotten that close, let alone two of them." Todd sighed. "Have their standards slipped so low?"

"Well, there's another reason for that."

"What's that?"

"There's a divide in the Establishment," I said. Someone took a sharp breath, I couldn't tell which one. "One group doesn't care what happens to me. They don't outright help Shade and his crew, but they don't interfere with whatever he does. Alistair's part of that. Probably at the head of it."

"Safe assumption."

"The other side of things is a group that doesn't agree with him, they think the Establishment is heading in the wrong direction. They're outnumbered, though." I sighed. "We're only fielding around ninety trained agents these days. That's why they assigned me to do some easy tasks around here."

"Only ninety?" Star sounded shocked.

"Alistair purged the ranks when I left," Todd said. "They never fully recovered. Too many Establishment agents leave once they find out what's expected of them."

"What do you mean?" I asked. "The uplift idea you told me before?"

"Alistair wants to uplift humanity so that his chosen successors can rule over it. That man thinks a benevolent dictatorship is the way to go." Todd snorted. "It sounds like a noble goal to lift humanity up to the next stage of evolution, doesn't it? That's you, for the record."

That sounded oddly familiar to Absynthe's description of psions as a different species. "Great. So I'm a superior race, I guess."

"Don't let it go to your head, sweetheart," Star said.

"The problem for the Establishment comes when their agents put the pieces together. Namely, they don't get shit out of this. They're stepping-stones, low-level minions. Alistair has all the power, and he is very particular about who he puts his trust in. If you're not one of those people, you're just one of his tools. Sounds familiar, right?"

"Absolutely."

"Oddly enough, people leave once they figure out they're a tool." Todd laughed. "This is good to know. We've always had good information on the Establishment. This confirms many things. Good job, Kev."

"That's not all," I said. "I was asked to give you a message."

"What?"

"Alex says she misses you, and she needs your help."

I didn't know what to expect, but a loud laugh wasn't high on the list. "Does she now?"

"That's the message she asked me to pass along."

"So she knows you're in contact with me and you're still alive. You have all the subtlety of a tank, you know."

I grinned. "She said the same thing about me once."

"I said it enough, it must have stuck in her head." He laughed again. "So how do you know Alex?"