The Firebrand Who Unlocked His Heart (8 page)

‘I’m sure there’s some wine around here, if you’d prefer.’ He waved his glass in the general direction of the room. ‘Or I can ring for Burton to bring us some.’

‘Don’t be daft,’ Colleen said. ‘It’s after one in the morning. Let the man have his sleep.’

Daniel’s teeth flashed. ‘Okay, warm milk it is.’ He got to his feet and looked around the room. ‘I’m sure there’s a pan around here somewhere.’

‘I should go,’ Colleen said.

‘For God’s sake, woman. Stay. I’m not going to bite you. Anyway, it’s me who should be more nervous than you. God knows what you’re going to accuse me of next.’

‘I’m sorry about earlier and the other night,’ Colleen said. ‘I shouldn’t have snapped at you. You’ve enough on your plate.’

‘Well, Nurse Colleen, to be honest I’ve had enough of people agreeing with me. It makes a pleasant change to have someone tell me what’s really on their mind.’

She couldn’t tell from the tone of his voice or his expression whether he was teasing her or meant what he said. She decided to take his words at face value. Otherwise there was the danger they would get into another undignified slanging match.

Daniel was opening cupboards at random, muttering under his breath when each one failed to reveal what he was looking for.

‘Grief, Daniel. Don’t tell me you’ve never cooked yourself anything in this kitchen before.’ But weren’t her brothers just the same? The minute they entered their mother’s kitchen it was as if they lost the use of their
arms and legs. Colleen took a mug from the top of the dresser where they were displayed for anyone to see.

‘This and the microwave will do fine,’ she said.

‘Microwave? Do you think Dora would allow such a thing in her kitchen?’ Daniel widened his eyes in mock dismay. Then suddenly the tension was broken.

‘Sit down,’ Colleen told Daniel. ‘I’ll do it. Would you like some, too?’

He peered at his whisky glass as if surprised to find it empty. He reached across the table and grasped the neck of the bottle sitting there. ‘I think I’ll stick with this if it’s all the same to you.’

Colleen watched anxiously as he poured himself a hefty measure and slugged it back in one go. A sober Daniel was difficult enough to deal with, but an inebriated one? As he reached for the whisky bottle again she whisked it away. ‘I think you’ve had enough, don’t you?’

He eyed her balefully. ‘Did anyone ever tell you that you’re a bossy woman?’

‘Many times,’ Colleen said lightly. ‘And I’ve been called worse things than that, too.’

‘Can’t imagine why,’ Daniel said drily. He sat up in his chair. ‘You know, I find myself wanting to know more about Colleen McCulloch. The woman, that is, not the nurse. That’s fair, isn’t it? After all, you know all my sordid little secrets.’

Colleen emptied some milk into a saucepan and placed it on the stove to heat. ‘I wouldn’t call your secrets sordid,’ she said. ‘You’re no different to thousands of parents. People get caught up and fail to recognise what’s important. I guess it happens to us all at some time or another.’

He leaned back in his chair. ‘Letting me off the hook,
then? Somehow I can’t imagine you failing to recognise what’s important. Too perfect for a start.’

Her perfect? She wished! And certainly not recently. A perfect person would never have behaved towards Daniel the way she had earlier. A perfect person would never have got into the mess she had with Ciaran. A perfect person would never have become engaged simply because it seemed the easiest thing to do and their families wanted it. The truth was that was exactly what had happened and now she was going to have to do something about it and hurt someone she loved in the process. Because although she wasn’t in love with Ciaran, she did care about him. No. She knew only too well she was far from perfect.

‘I don’t think my brothers would agree with you,’ she said. ‘They always claimed that Daddy let me get away with murder.’

She took her drink and sat down opposite Daniel.

‘Tell me about your family,’ he said. ‘I’d really like to know.’

Reluctant to spoil the easy atmosphere, Colleen refrained from reminding him that he’d already looked into her family. But knowing how many siblings she had and what they did, or did not do, for a living was one thing. Knowing what it was like to be part of a noisy, argumentative but loving household, another. She could only imagine how chaotic her family would seem to Daniel if he ever met them. Which, of course, was extremely unlikely to happen.

‘Mammy and Dad always owned a farm,’ she said. ‘At first they farmed livestock—cattle, sheep, that sort of thing—then Daddy decided that horses were the way to go. He sold off all the livestock and invested in a few brood mares. I suspect he thought that horse breeding
was more lucrative somehow than cattle. He always hoped to make his fortune, you see. And that was unlikely to happen with a large family and with the prices of livestock falling all the time.’

‘Were you poor?’ Daniel asked.

Colleen laughed. ‘That depends on what you mean by poor. I guess by your standards we were. At least in monetary terms, but in everything else, no, I always felt rich.’

‘Explain,’ Daniel said.

Colleen quirked an eyebrow at him. ‘Is this how you cross-examine a witness?’

To his credit, Daniel looked abashed. ‘Sorry. What I should have said was, “Go on, tell me more”.’

‘I can’t remember not feeling happy as a child. At least until Cahil’s accident and Daddy became depressed. But before that there was always something to do. Help Daddy on the farm or play with my bothers—when they’d let me, of course. They used to tease me about being a girl, so I was always trying to show them how tough I was. Led to a few cuts and scrapes, I can tell you.’

‘Now why don’t I find that hard to imagine? I can just see the little girl you were. Hair flying in the wind as you ran barefoot over the hills.’

‘Come on,’ Colleen retorted. ‘We weren’t that poor. We had shoes like everyone else.’ When she saw him smile she knew she had been suckered.

‘No, up until Daddy sold the cattle for the horses we were comfortably off. But somehow he could never get the hang of breeding horses.’ Her heart ached as she remembered her father’s slip into depression. ‘I know he felt a failure, but it wasn’t all his fault. One of the brood mares became unwell suddenly and had to be put down,
another foaled, but her colt died. And so it went on until he was left with only one of the five he had invested in. Believe me, high-quality brood mares are expensive to buy and even more expensive to keep.

‘We tried to help him, at least my older brothers did—I was too young and at school—but things got so bad that eventually my brothers had to stop helping him on the farm and find work in Dublin. My mother hated her sons leaving and my father felt it was his fault. And then Cahil had his accident. Daddy was never the same. It was as if he’d given up on life. Of course I know now that it was depression, but back then I couldn’t understand why Daddy had gone from this laughing man to someone who never smiled and just sat in his chair all day long. The family kind of broke apart then. My mother was distraught. She didn’t know how to help him.’

Colleen didn’t know why she was telling Daniel all this. Perhaps because it was late. Perhaps it was the semi-darkness, or perhaps it was because he had been through his own kind of hell.

‘I’m sorry. What happened to your brother? Can you talk about it?’

Colleen drew in a breath. ‘Cahil was the youngest. I was eleven when he was born. I think he was as much of a surprise to Mammy and Daddy as he was to me. But they were happy to have another child. By that time they were still well enough off and there was plenty of room on the farm for one more. But when Cahil was eight my other brothers were working off the farm and Daddy needed help to bring one of the horses in from the field. He wasn’t keeping so well by this time so Mammy suggested he wait until one of the older boys came back from work. Cahil must have been listening. He always
wanted to be like the big boys. He went out to the field without telling my parents. But the horse wasn’t used to him. She had a bit of a temper and was about to foal, but whatever happened we can’t be sure. Mammy only noticed that Cahil was gone when she called him for his tea. They found him unconscious in the field. It looked as if the horse had reared up and kicked Cahil in the head. To cut a long story short, Cahil was in hospital for months. Mammy wanted him home. Just like you, she had no faith that the doctors and nurses would look after her baby as well as she could. Daddy was beside himself and no use. He could barely bring himself to look at Cahil. So every day after school, I helped Mammy care for Cahil. She was like a woman possessed. The doctors told her that it was unlikely that my little brother would ever be able to walk or talk or even feed himself. But she wasn’t having it. She bullied and coaxed my brother and slowly he began to learn to walk and talk all over again. You should see him now. He still has some short-term memory problems and mixes up his words, but as you know he plays for the local football team and helps my mother on the farm. You would never know just by looking at him that once the doctors held out little hope.’

‘So that’s why you do what you do,’ Daniel said. ‘I knew there must be a reason why you were so driven. Your patients are just like your brother all over again, aren’t they?’

She wriggled under his intense gaze, surprised by his perception.

‘I guess so. I know what the power of love can achieve and that’s why, no matter how much Harry pushes you away, you have to believe that right now he needs you more than ever.’

‘And your father? What happened to him?’

Colleen sucked in a breath as pain lanced through her. ‘He died shortly after Cahil’s accident. He didn’t live long enough to know that his son made an almost complete recovery. He died feeling guilty and a failure. So you see, Daniel, I know all about what guilt can do to a man.’

The clock ticked into the silence. What Colleen had said surprised Daniel. He was certain there was more to her story—his job had given him an instinct for when people weren’t telling the whole truth—but if there was more, he would wait until she decided to tell him. If she ever told him. He studied her as she sipped the last of her drink. He would never have guessed that she had her own tragedy in her life. When she wasn’t challenging him, hands on hips and grey eyes blazing, her mouth was curved in an almost permanent smile.

With her dark hair tumbling in loose curls over her shoulders instead of clasped back in the usual ponytail, she looked younger, less severe. Her skin was pale, almost translucent, with an alluring sprinkling of freckles across the bridge of her nose that he found unbearably cute. In fact, there was a great deal about Colleen that he found cute. He liked the way her grey eyes sparked when she was in a temper. He liked the way her mouth twitched when she was trying not to laugh. He liked the way she stood up to him, he liked the way she treated his son and he even liked the way she looked, even in those ridiculous bunny slippers she was wearing on her feet and those childish pyjamas. Her dressing gown had fallen open slightly, revealing a spaghetti top, exposing creamy shoulders and just a hint of cleavage. On the bottom half she was wearing boxer shorts depicting cartoon characters. His brain saw all this, registered it logically and coolly, but there was nothing cool about the way his
body was reacting. He hadn’t seen her legs before—they were usually hidden by the trousers she always wore, but who in their right mind would hide legs like that? They were slim and toned. The sort of legs that just begged a man to run his hands up their silky smoothness. When she’d leaned over him to place his milk on the table in front of him he’d caught a scent of vanilla and strawberries and he’d shifted in his chair to hide his sudden and immediate response to her. Perhaps it was the whisky or perhaps it was because he’d not been with a woman for a long time? But suddenly an image of Colleen lying underneath him, her body all sweet curves and softness, her grey eyes clouded with desire, filled his head. He shook the image away.

Maybe he was seeing her in a different light because she had allowed him to see the vulnerable side of her.

No wonder he was rattled. The last thing he’d expected was that he couldn’t get the Irish harridan out of his head. She was nothing like the women he usually dated. All of a sudden he wanted to see her at one of the dinners he attended—the looks on the other women’s faces as she outshone them with her simple beauty despite their designer dresses and hundred-pound haircuts. He bit back a groan. Great. That was all he needed right now. A developing case of the hots for his son’s nurse—a woman who just happened to be in love with another man.

C
OLLEEN
stretched languorously as the sun poured in her bedroom window. For some reason this morning, she felt happier than she had since she took up the job here. She smiled to herself. Maybe it was because she had come to a decision about Ciaran and because some of the tension between her and Daniel had disappeared. After all, her job would be so much easier without the constant clashing of wills. Or maybe it was because she had talked to Daniel about her dad? No one in the family could bring themselves to talk about those final days. Not in front of their mother anyway. They were all too scared that a mention of his name would send Mammy into another paroxysm of grieving. Perhaps it was time that they did talk about Daddy? When she was home next she would try.

She jumped out of bed before Dora could arrive with her tea. She couldn’t get used to being served her tea in bed by the housekeeper. It seemed so lazy.

* * *

By the time she came out of the shower the tea tray had been left on the table. Dora had even added a small vase of flowers. It seemed that Dora was beginning to thaw towards her. But when she bent to pour the tea, she noticed
a small envelope addressed to her in unfamiliar handwriting.

Puzzled, she tore it open. It was from Daniel. It was brief and to the point. ‘Thanks for the warm milk. And for telling me about your brother. Most of all thank you for caring about my son.’

Something shifted behind her ribs. Daniel wasn’t so bad once you got to know him. They had got off on the wrong foot, that was all. And if her heart had done a crazy little pirouette when she’d seen the note was from him, well, that was just a sign of the pleasure she felt that they seemed to have reached an understanding.

* * *

As soon as she was dressed she went to Harry’s room. After their chat last night, she’d half-expected to find Daniel by his son’s bedside and not just the night nurse. Colleen tried to ignore the thud of disappointment—which was, of course, on behalf of Harry, wasn’t it?

‘Morning, sunshine,’ she chirped.

Harry turned his head at the sound of her voice and smiled. Colleen felt her heart melt—what would happen the day that devastating grin finally reached his emerald eyes? Then she’d be a goner, that was for sure. She was getting far too fond of Harry already, but there was something so special about this young man that she couldn’t help herself.

The night nurse gave Colleen a quick handover before she left. ‘Has Mr Frobisher been in to see Harry this morning?’ Colleen asked softly, so that Harry couldn’t hear.

The nurse—Sheena—nodded. ‘An hour ago. Harry was still asleep. Mr Frobisher didn’t stay long, though, said he’d an important meeting to go to and wouldn’t be back till later.’

Colleen closed the door behind Sheena. So much for thinking she’d got through to Daniel last night. It was all she could do to stop herself from marching to the nearest telephone and telling Daniel Frobisher exactly what she thought of him! But she had Harry to concentrate on and that was far more important. Instead, she pulled open the curtains and flung the patio doors wide before turning back to her charge.

‘Oh, Harry, it’s such a beautiful day—too good for staying indoors. Are you up for some fresh air?’

Harry nodded his head slowly and moved his mouth. ‘Yes. Outside. Nice.’

Colleen laughed in delight. ‘Excellent, Harry—you’re doing it! You’re almost there—before you know it you’ll be chatting twenty to the dozen, giving me a run for my money, eh?’

His grin widened and Colleen put her hands on her hips in mock horror. ‘Are you trying to say I talk too much, young man?’

A sound of delight bubbled from Harry. It was the nearest she’d seen him come to laughing properly. Oh, why wasn’t Daniel here to see his son take these tiny, but oh-so-significant steps forwards? Despite his protestations of love, words, after all, were easy to say—acts of love were much harder to do. If only he could understand how much he was missing out on.

She tilted her head to the side. ‘You know, Harry, I think you’re ready to try something new this morning.’ Suddenly his eyes widened in fear and his smile faded. Colleen sat on his bed and reached for his hands, stroking them gently. ‘No, no, don’t worry. Trust me, Harry. I won’t do anything to harm or frighten you, you know that, don’t you?’

When Harry didn’t reply, she continued, keeping her
tone light and soothing. ‘Your dad told me how much you used to love swimming, especially when you were little. Well, I think we should try swimming today; it will really help your arms and legs rebuild their muscles. What do you think?’

Still he gazed back at her. ‘I know you’re not sure about it, Harry, but I promise I’ll look after you. You’ll be safe with me, you know that, don’t you, sweetheart?’

Harry nodded slowly.

Colleen didn’t want to let him see how relieved she felt. If he’d refused or become agitated, there was no way she could have forced him. It was vital that Harry trusted her completely so that he would feel safe in the water and hydrotherapy would bring on his mobility in leaps and bounds. Colleen ruffled his har. ‘You’re my trooper, aren’t you? A brave young man, that’s what you are! And it’ll be fun, you’ll see.’ With expert practice she dressed him in a pair of boxer shorts and, using the hoist, manoeuvred him into his wheelchair, chatting all the while. Despite her best jokes and quips, Harry didn’t smile once. Colleen could sense his apprehension.

She knelt down in front of him. ‘I know you’re still unsure, Harry, so I’ll tell you what. Will it make you feel better if I ask Burton to help?’ Colleen grinned. ‘Hey, maybe I should ask him to put on a costume and come swimming with us. He might have one of those one-piece bathing suits that goes to his knees.’

She was rewarded with a smile. Now all she had to do was persuade Burton!

‘You wait there, now. Give me a minute while I put my costume on and give Burton the good news.’

* * *

To give him credit, Burton didn’t put up as much resistance as she’d expected. Perhaps he was too used to
Daniel’s extravagant requests that nothing much fazed him any more—not that she could imagine what those would be. Who knew how the rich and priviliged lived?

Still, she felt a bit guilty laughing at him behind his back. But it had been worth it to have made Harry smile, she thought.

To her surprise, Burton was already there waiting for them and she almost pushed the wheelchair into one of the elaborate marble columns when she saw him. What in all that was holy was he wearing! Far from the old-fashioned costume she’d half-expected, the older man was dressed in the skimpiest briefs she’d ever seen in her entire life. If he’d worn a wig and a false moustache, she couldn’t have been more taken aback.

Colleen averted her eyes from his expanse of bare chest and hairy back, although it took a huge amount of will power to keep her gaze from straying away from his. It was as if her eyes had a sudden will of their own. Thank God they had to concentrate on getting the hoist round Harry and lowering him on to the sling at the side of the pool. When he was secure, Colleen slipped into the warm water and between them they lowered Harry in.

Whilst Burton sat on the side, Colleen slipped her arms under Harry’s back and eased him free. His eyes cast round desperately and she tilted him towards her, so that he could see her face.

‘Well done,’ she soothed. ‘I’ve got you and I’m going to let you go, Harry. Just try to let the water swirl around you.’

It took a fair amount of cajoling and encouragement, but within ten minutes she felt her young patient begin to relax. ‘You’re doing really well, sweetheart.’

Suddenly she noticed his gaze slip from hers to over
her shoulder and he tensed. Colleen turned round in the water so she could see what had caught his attention.

It wasn’t what—it was who. Daniel stood uncertainly at the side of the pool. Thankfully he didn’t shop in the same store that Buton did and his swimming shorts were far more modest. She couldn’t help noticing that they somehow accentuated his tanned, smooth chest and broad shoulders and didn’t make his muscular legs look too shabby either.

‘Can I join you?’ Daniel asked.

‘What do you think, Harry? Can your dad swim with us?’ Colleen gazed down at the young lad, willing him to relax. She looked up and caught Daniel’s eye. Almost imperceptibly, she nodded.

Daniel nodded to Burton. ‘That’s okay, Burton, I’ll take over from here.’

‘Very well, sir.’ There was no mistaking the look of relief in Burton’s eyes. Colleen caught Daniel’s eyes and for a moment his lips twitched. Clearly he found the sight of Burton in his swimwear as amusing as she did. Colleen’s heart skipped a beat.

With a graceful ease belying his size, Daniel dived in at the deep end and swam towards them. Harry’s eyes widened and he flailed his body, pressing himself as close as possible to her. The arm around her neck tightened and his fingers grasped her hair. Ignoring the sharp pain, Colleen kept her tone even. ‘Remember when I said you could trust me, darling? Remember when I promised I wouldn’t let any harm come to you? Well, it’s the same with your daddy. He only wants to help, Harry.’

Harry tore his eyes away from his father and looked at her. His deep-green eyes searched her face, looking for the slightest hint that she wasn’t telling the truth, and in
that moment she knew that if Daniel let him down now, made one wrong move, the tiny delicate thread holding father and son together would be broken—maybe forever.

‘How about letting your dad hold you? That way I could move your arms and legs about a bit in the water?’

‘No.’ Harry shook his head.

Colleen met Daniel’s gaze over Harry’s blond curls. His anguish was unmistakable, but yet he didn’t move away from them.

She brushed her lips against Harry’s cheeks. ‘Your dad is a big strong man, darling, and he’s going to hold on to you tight.’

Finally Daniel spoke. ‘I won’t let you go, son. I promise you.’

Gently Colleen untangled Harry’s arms from around her neck and eased him towards his father. Between the two of them they held the too thin child, until Colleen felt his under-used muscles finally relax.

Signalling to Daniel with a nod of her head, she again reassured Harry, ‘I’m going to let go now, but just so I can move your legs, okay? Your dad’s got you safe.’

As Colleen moved away, Daniel eased himself down into the shallow water, cradling his son in his arms. She watched as, ever so slowly, Harry’s arms snaked around his father’s neck and clasped on to him tightly.

For a split second she could see Daniel’s eyes widen in surprise, then he was looking down at his son, beaming from ear to ear. Pulling him closer, until his blond curls were tucked into his neck, Daniel looked at Colleen.

Thank you,
he mouthed.

* * *

‘What would you like to do this afternoon, Harry?’ Colleen asked a couple of days later. ‘I know Nathan is
coming over this morning, but if the weather clears up later, perhaps we could go out for a while?’

As they were talking, Dora came in with Harry’s breakfast and set the tray on the table.

‘I think you should have a go at feeding yourself,’ Colleen said to Harry. ‘Now you’re bound to make an almighty mess at first, so we’ll do it before your wash. How about it? Are you willing to have a go?’

Colleen cut up Harry’s toast that had been supplied with his scrambled egg into easily manageable slices. She wouldn’t call them soldiers. Harry would hate to be treated as if he were five instead of twelve.

To her delight, Harry managed, although with some difficulty, to pick up one of the pieces of toast in his hand and bring it towards his mouth. She waited with bated breath as he concentrated hard on bringing the morsel to his lips. Finally, after a couple of false starts, he managed to get it in his mouth. The fine motor control required meant that he was improving in leaps and bounds. He was making progress far quicker than she had dared to hope.

* * *

Just as they had finished breakfast and Harry was sitting up in his chair by the window, Daniel came into the room. He was wearing dark trousers and an open neck shirt—no tie.

‘Hello, everyone,’ he said. ‘I’ve taken the morning off work so we can spend it together. What would you like to do, Harry?’

Harry glanced up at his father and smiled briefly.

‘Nathan,’ he mumbled.

‘Nathan’s coming this morning,’ Colleen said quickly, seeing Daniel’s disappointment. ‘What about doing something this afternoon instead? I was just saying to
Harry that we should try to have a session in the pool, but we could all go somewhere later.’

Daniel ruffled Harry’s hair.

‘You could have Nathan over another day,’ Daniel said. ‘I have to be in court this afternoon. It would give us the chance to do something together first. And you can choose.’

The boy pulled his head away and Colleen caught the bleak look in Daniel’s eyes before the usual mask came down.
Don’t push it
, she wanted to say.
Give him time.

Harry shook his head again. ‘Nathan!’

Daniel’s mouth tightened. ‘You can have Nathan visit later. I’ve taken the morning off, despite the fact that I should be going over this afternoon’s case, so I think you and I should do something this morning, Harry.’

Harry flung Colleen a look so full of entreaty she couldn’t ignore it. Daniel was going about this all wrong. Couldn’t he see that?

‘I think since Nathan is already coming over, we should leave things the way they are,’ Colleen said evenly.

Daniel pulled a hand through his hair and a look of resignation crossed his face. ‘Whatever you prefer, son.’ And with one final look at Colleen, he turned on his heel and left the room.

Harry looked angry. As well he might be. ‘Dad. Work. Typical,’ he said. ‘No time for me.’

Although Colleen was thrilled that Harry’s speech and understanding was so much improved, it was the relationship between father and son that was concerning her.

‘To be fair to him, Harry, he didn’t know Nathan was expected. Your dad did want to spend time with you.’

She crouched by Harry’s side and took his hand. ‘You need to be patient with him. He’s trying his best.’