The Fold (21 page)

“It’s no use. How are we supposed to find him in this crowd?” Joyce said, gnawing in frustration at the webbing of skin on her hand.

“Joyce, stop chewing on your skin,” Gomo said, coming up behind them along with the rest of Joyce’s family.

Joyce reluctantly pulled her hand away from her face and greeted Gomo with a kiss. “On-young-ha-say-yo, Gomo. You look very nice today. That blouse goes well with your lipstick.”

Gina turned around and waved. “Hi, Gomo.”

Gomo did her best to smile back. “You two are looking especially pretty for church today. I like that both of you are wearing dresses instead of those pants for once.”

“Thank you, Gomo,” Joyce and Gina chirped.

Suddenly, Gina gripped Joyce’s forearm. Out of the corner of her lips, Gina muttered, “Far right corner of the courtyard. White shirt, gray slacks, killer tan.”

Joyce’s eyes jumped at Gina’s instructions. John Ford Kang was standing with his father near some bushes in the corner. His father was deep in conversation with
another older gentleman while John stood there awkwardly, his hands fiddling with his striped tie.

Joyce tried not to crane her head as she peered over someone standing in front of her. John gazed in her direction just as Joyce jumped a little to get a better look at him.

“Ahhh,” Joyce said and crouched down low. She didn’t want him to think she was that desperate to see him.

“Joyce, stand up,” Gomo instructed.

Joyce stood up straighter but put a hunch into her posture. “I think he saw me,” Joyce whispered to Gina.

“Ohhhh, someone else spotted him, too,” Gina reported.

Joyce had to peek again. She angled herself directly behind another man and then stole a quick glance. Lisa Yim was walking up to John’s group. Lisa linked arms with the gentleman talking to John’s father and talked animatedly to John.

Joyce slouched forward. “I have no chance with Lisa Yim around.”

“What do you mean?” Gina asked, watching them.

“She told me that John likes her.”

“No, he does not,” Gina stated.

“Look at her. She’s gorgeous. How do you know he doesn’t like her?” Joyce wondered.

“Because I heard that he turned Lisa down when she asked him out.”

Joyce gasped. “Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

“Who’s your source?”

Gina pointed at herself.

Joyce’s eyes widened in disbelief.

“I work at a department store. A lot of people walk through there. I can’t help it if I happen to overhear conversations about a certain high school student having the nerve to turn down a certain college student, while I’m crouched strategically in a nook behind all the gift bags, which are free after a purchase worth more than nineteen ninety-nine.”

Joyce shook her head. “Sam was right. You are dangerous.”

“What did Sam say?”

Joyce started to answer when she felt a tap on her shoulder.

“Hi, Joyce.”

Joyce recognized the voice as though it were the sound of her beating heart. Instantly. There was a
sudden hush of voices. Joyce slowly turned around. She felt like she was underwater, trying to move quickly only to find her limbs pushing against all that weight. The crowd of faces around her stretched and elongated, blending into the background as one face crystallized in front of her. John Ford Kang. Joyce blinked. He was still there.

“Hey,” she said weakly and focused on making sure her knees wouldn’t buckle.

“Hey. Can I stand in line with you?”

“Uh, sure,” Joyce said. Gina ribbed her in the side. “Oh, this is my friend Gina.”

John reached over and shook Gina’s hand. “Hey, I remember you from AP Art History.”

“Yeah, that’s right.” Gina’s cheeks bunched up and she beamed out her best teeth-baring smile. It didn’t take much to win over Gina.

John turned back to Joyce. “You didn’t stay for the barbecue after the volleyball game.”

“Oh, right. I had to work that night,” Joyce squeaked.

“But not as much now, right? Especially with that new waitress,” John said.

Joyce stared at him. Had he been by the restaurant again?

The line started to move forward. As they stepped toward the entrance to the church, Gina poked Joyce in the side and pointed her chin in someone’s direction. Joyce glanced over to find Lisa Yim standing near the entrance, squinting in her direction. Her eyes narrowed into focused lasers on Joyce and her family as John walked beside them. Just as they entered the church, Joyce saw Lisa rushing off into the fellowship hall, her cell phone pressed firmly to her ear as her entourage of girlfriends swarmed around her.

John sat with his father a few rows down from them. Joyce tried not to stare at the back of his head the whole time, but after a minute of counting light fixtures, Joyce let her eyes wander back over. It just killed her the way his hair curled at the edges like that. Must be from all the seawater, Joyce reasoned.

At the end of the sermon, as Joyce tried to nonchalantly take her time getting out of her row, Gomo took her hand and led her past the line of people waiting to shake the pastor’s hand and out into the courtyard.

“Joyce,” Gomo said, “I did not have time to tell you earlier, but the surgery is next week.”

“Next week? I thought it was next month.”

“Dr. Rie-ne-or’s office called and said they could fit you in sooner.”

“But next week, my friend is having a show.” Joyce groaned and threw back her head, her eyes shut tight against the thought of trying to explain to Gina and Sam.

“I have already made the appointment,” Gomo said. “I am sure your friend will understand.”

Joyce nodded and turned to leave.

“The handsome boy is over in the fellowship hall with his father,” Gomo said and walked away.

Joyce wandered into the fellowship hall, where Uhmma and some of the other mothers were setting out the food. John was with his father getting coffee. Joyce stood in the doorway, wondering if she should go over and talk to him. Would it be obvious that Joyce was following him around? Where was Gina? Joyce checked the crowd. No Gina or Sam. Joyce was on her own this time, but she could handle this. She could face John Ford Kang because she was ready. Joyce flipped her hair off her shoulders. Check. She ran her finger along the edge of her lips to erase any lipstick smudges. Check. She gingerly reached up to check her eyes. Sticky tape. Joyce quickly turned around and bolted from the room. As she ran for the bathroom, her gaze firmly on the ground, she reached up to her upper eyelids again. Her eyelids had fallen.

Joyce made it into the bathroom without anyone stopping her. Three stalls were full, so she headed to the farthest stall to wait them out. Two toilets flushed almost at the same time. Joyce could hear the water running as the women chatted and washed their hands. Just before they were about to leave, the third toilet flushed and the sound of sharp metal heel taps echoed through the bathroom.

“Hi, Lisa,” one voice called out.

Shushed conversation slipped back and forth. Then suddenly a voice rang out in alarm,“Helen Kim. Gay!”

“Shhhh!”

The women switched to Korean, but continued to whisper urgently as they headed out the door. Joyce sat completely frozen. Had she really heard what she thought she had heard? Shoot. Joyce slammed the side of her head with the heel of her hand. Why hadn’t she checked their shoes? Who were those women that Lisa had been talking to? Joyce recalled Lisa saying how Su Yon’s mother and Lisa’s mother had grown up in the same village. Joyce knew Lisa was kind of superficial, but to be so vicious and cruel—that overinflated weasel of a gossip. Joyce wanted to pop those balloons she called breasts and watch them leak and sag
to Lisa’s knees. Joyce slammed her fist into the stall door and stepped out.

This was going to kill Helen. Joyce had to warn her. News like this spread quicker than a virus. As Joyce quickly turned to leave, her reflection in the mirror caught her eyes. Joyce groaned. She forgot she had to reattach her eyelids. It would take forever without Gina to help her. Joyce stepped closer to the mirror. She couldn’t face John without the folds. And if she didn’t make her impression today, Lisa Yim would just swoop right in. What should she do? She didn’t have enough time. Joyce started at herself and exhaled slowly. There was only one true answer. Joyce pulled the tape off her skin.

“Owww!” Joyce yelled. God, beauty hurt.

Joyce flew out of the bathroom and raced into the courtyard. Small groups were gathered together in conversation. Some people’s eyes turned in her direction when she stepped onto the shaded area. Joyce found herself studying everyone’s lips, looking for words like
Helen
and
gay
. She frantically scoured the yard for Helen. On a far bench, Sam and Gina sat talking and laughing. Joyce rushed over.

“Hey,” Joyce said breathlessly, “have you seen Helen?”

Gina turned to her with a smile until she saw Joyce’s face. “Joyce, what happened to your eyes?”

“They fell. I’ll explain later,” Joyce said.

“Joyce, we can fix them. I have more tape,” Gina said, standing up.

“It doesn’t matter anymore. You have to help me find Helen.”

“Joyce,” Gina said, “calm down. What’s going on? Is something wrong with Helen?”

Joyce bit her bottom lip, trying to contain all the thoughts jamming into her mind. Everywhere she looked, more and more faces seemed to be glancing in Joyce’s direction, lips whispering. The news was spreading.

“I need to find Helen,” Joyce said.

Gina stood up in alarm. “Okay, Joyce. Let’s go.”

Sam stood up as well, and the three of them walked from area to area, combing the faces for Helen. Joyce continued to see the looks, hear the whispers, as she passed. With each glance, Joyce stood up straighter. With every conversation that suddenly hushed as she approached, she added a swing to her hips. Who did these people think they were to talk about Helen like she had a disease or something? Joyce walked through the church like she owned the place.

As she stepped inside the fellowship hall, Joyce froze as soon as she saw John standing near the door, eating a chocolate doughnut. Somehow the sight of him and chocolate together was just enough to make Joyce stumble and crumble to the ground. Gina caught her right before her ass hit the floor.

John rushed over. “Whoa. Are you okay?” He took her hand and helped her up.

Joyce immediately felt her face flush red. “I’m such a klutz,” she said.

John smiled. “I seem to inspire that reaction in you.”

“Huh?” Joyce said.

“You’re always falling down when you see me.”

Joyce groaned and laughed. John smiled down at her and in that moment, she realized that John didn’t even notice that anything was different about her. And without the folds, Joyce felt like herself around him instead of some coy cheerleader-type character.

“Can I get you a doughnut?” John offered.

Joyce stared into his eyes for a second. This had to be dream. “No, I’m okay,” she said.

“Joyce,” Gina called out, “Helen is in the kitchen.”

Joyce refocused her attention. “I’ll catch you later,” she said and stepped away from John.

John pointed his finger at her. “No. I’ll catch you later. That’s a promise.”

Joyce walked away with a shake of her head. He was kind of a dork. Joyce smiled. She could really fall for him.

Helen was in the kitchen with Uhmma and a few of the other women, cleaning up the dishes. Joyce raced over to her and muttered urgently, “We have to talk.”

Helen continued drying a dish. “What’s up, Joyce?”

“Privately,” Joyce said.

Helen tilted her head but handed Uhmma the dish before following Joyce to the back of the kitchen.

“I heard some women talking about you,” Joyce whispered.

“What do you mean?” Helen said, her eyes on the floor.

“They said your name and then
gay
.”

Helen covered her mouth with her hand. After a moment, she raised her eyes and fired off angrily, “Damn it, Joyce. I knew Gina would talk.”

Joyce stepped back. “Helen,” Joyce started to explain.

“That blabbermouth friend of yours,” Helen said, her jaw clenching and unclenching.

“Helen, I never got the chance to tell Gina. It wasn’t her.”

Helen’s eyes wrinkled in confusion. “Then who was it? I don’t understand who would want to spread that news about me. Are you sure you heard correctly?”

Joyce nodded. She could tell Helen about Lisa and John later.

Helen turned away. Uhmma saw the look on Helen’s face and left the two ladies she was speaking with and came over to them.

“What is wrong, Helen?” Uhmma asked.

“Joyce said she heard some women talking about me in the bathroom.”

Uhmma touched Helen’s face. “What do you want to do?”

“I just want to go home. I don’t want to deal with this here, now.”

Uhmma quickly shed the apron and waved good-bye to the women.

The three of them stepped out into the fellowship hall, and this time Joyce knew for sure that she was not imagining things. Almost every pair of eyes turned and glanced over at them. Uhmma reached out and grasped each daughter’s hand and with her head perfectly poised, walked them through the hall and out into the courtyard.

Gomo was sitting with some of her older lady friends and as soon as she saw Uhmma with Helen and Joyce, she stood up. Her friends glanced from Gomo to Uhmma and then back to Gomo. Uhmma paused for a second in her step, but then she strode forward. Gomo blocked Uhmma’s path.

Gomo whispered, “If you had made Helen keep dating Mr. Moon, we would not have to face these ugly rumors.”

Uhmma turned to Gomo, her face calm and for once unconcerned with anything Gomo had said. “They are not rumors.”

Gomo’s eyes widened in shock.

“Please, Gomo, I will explain everything back at home. This is not the place to have such an important conversation. Our family is what matters the most right now. You have always said this, and it is still true. We are a family, and we must support and help one another.”

Gomo lowered her eyes. Uhmma waited, her eyes softening as Gomo struggled to compose herself. Even though half of Gomo’s face was frozen, even Joyce could see the lines of pain wrinkling the few areas that could move.