The Forever Journey (6 page)

Passing the laboratory he heard Arnaud, apparently talking to himself. He stopped to listen.

“We have all had a strange turn or two since we left for Mars. I do not know what ails us, but it will pass,” Arnaud was saying, his voice muffled.

An unexpected smile crept over his face. It was most endearing that Arnaud voiced out loud his thoughts, something Nathanial had noticed often, not that he would ever tell the Frenchman that.

Nathanial stopped listening to Arnaud’s soothing tones and set himself back on course to talk to Folkard. Now that he was on his way, he wondered exactly how to broach the subject to him. He knew the captain was a most competent pilot, but Nathanial was unwilling to leave anything to chance.

5.

“
CAPTAIN, HAVE YOU
noticed anything odd with the ship of late?”

Folkard turned his head slightly to regard Stone from the corner of his eye then turned back to look out of the main window.

“Nothing that would raise any alarm, Professor.” Folkard batted away the concern.

“So we’re definitely not veering dangerously close to an aether vortex?”

Folkard turned around, discomforted by the tightly fastened straps digging into his sides. “I trust you do not doubt my abilities as your captain.”

“No,” Stone said meekly, retreating somewhat from his slightly inappropriate insinuation. “I have just been down to the engine room and Fenn reported irregular readings with the pressure, and spoke of the boiler ‘playing up’, as he put it.”

Folkard frowned and stroked his bushy beard. “Yes, he did mention said matter through the pipe, however it is only momentary, it will soon pass.”

Folkard regarded Stone carefully as the red-haired man glared out of the main window. By laying eyes on him for only a couple of seconds, he could feel that something dark was bothering the professor. But the feeling felt as if it came from within as opposed to being one gathered by sight alone. Had Stone sensed what he had felt earlier? Surely not.

“Are the effects due to a vortex though, Captain? You are aware of the dangers of such an anomaly, and also how I feel on the matter.”

“Yes, a vortex is forming, and the pull is slightly different to what I have previously experienced, but only to the extent of a minor pull. We shall soon escape its effects. As I said, Stone, nothing to worry yourself over.”

With Folkard’s assuring comment, the bulkhead of
Esmeralda 2
let out a prolonged groaning sound, like a whale being harpooned slowly.

The groaning continued while the two looked around them, as if in some vain attempt to pinpoint the location of the sound, before their gazes returned to each other.

Stone gave Folkard a grim look. “Are you so sure, Captain?”

6.

NATHANIAL SAT ON
a chair in the common room, his legs splayed out unceremoniously. He was on his own, something that he revelled in after the long day. It felt good to sit lost in thought, without interruption. Folkard’s protestation that he had everything under control was not enough.

His closed his eyes.
Peregrine
Station, and the putty like quality it acquired as it stretched, melting to nothing. The memory pained him immensely. Tears rolled down his cheeks, dropping onto his ginger whiskers. He sniffed and wiped them from his face, attempting to compose himself again.

He stood up from his seat and left the common room. In all the activity of the day, his mind had neglected to think of the one person who would be the most affected by the thought of nearing an aether vortex. Why he had not thought to visit Annabelle earlier was beyond him, but there was no time like the present to seek her out. Turning out from the common room, it took him seconds to reach her cabin and knock. There was no reply. He tried again “Annabelle?” He received no answer. Where the dickens could she be? He thought for a moment, then it came to him. The greenhouse! She was always checking the plants in there.

Nathanial stopped outside the greenhouse and knocked. Her head appeared from behind a large flower and she smiled at him.

“Hello, Nathanial,” she said, encouraging him into the room. She put down the sheers and slipped the gloves off her hands. “Is it true? There is something wrong with the pull of the aether vortex?”

“I’m afraid so,” he replied. “I…” He couldn’t find a starting point for his thoughts.

Annabelle smiled sadly at him, then pulled him into a gentle embrace. “It will not happen, not like before. We must not let it.” She looked Nathanial in the eyes. “I know what you’re thinking, for I feel it too. I never wanted to be near another aether vortex in my life after what happened to
Peregrine.
It is not something I would wish even for the worst of criminals. But such is the dangers of traversing the aether; we can only hope that our captain and your governor will be enough to get us past it without incident.”

Nathanial exhaled loudly. He stood over a plant, fingering the leaves; they were still a lush green, full of life. He wondered how much time they had left in them. Annabelle reached out and put a hand on his shoulder. He looked down, and patted it gently. They shared an uneasy look. Nathanial felt his cheeks flush and he turned away.

“I often think of
Peregrine
,” he said walking to the window, looking out at the stars. “I’ll never feel comfortable with the decision I had to make. If only there had been another way.”

“There was nothing that you could do, for me, or for them.”

“You know how awful I feel that you are burdened with that mechanical leg of yours. If I had known what was to happen, I…I would have done anything to stop it happening to you.”

“Oh, my dear Nathanial,” Annabelle replied, shaking her head. “There will be none of that talk. You cannot blame yourself for the actions of another. There was no way we could have foreseen it.”

He turned around to look at her, and said, “I will never understand how anyone could shoot someone without a second’s hesitation. It is a truly abominable act.”

Annabelle looked up at Nathanial, sadness in her eyes. “You mean someone like me, who shot Blayney in the head?

Nathanial shifted, uncomfortably. “No, of course not. You had cause. But that is something that I will remember always. I wish we’d never gone to Ceres. I don’t want to see you live to become something you’ll regret. A person without remorse.”

“As you say, I had to, to protect us, to save us from the Bubalus. One man’s life for that of everybody else on the station. If he had not died, then we would have all died as surely as the Bubalus young.”

Nathanial pondered this silently. Annabelle hung her head, avoiding his gaze.

“It… It worries me, this side of me,” she said. “I didn’t know it existed until we began traversing the planets.” She walked over to stand next to him, joining him in looking out at the stars. “If it was an isolated case, I could put it behind me, and think nothing of it, that I was only protecting my friends. It’s not just Blayney I wanted to kill, I meant to strike down Collins on Venus also, and would have done had not Thymon incinerated him.” She turned to Nathanial, pain besieging her face. “I think I’m cursed. How else can I describe it? It’s not going to go away either, it’s manifesting itself into a willingness to kill to protect those around me. What kind of person does that make me?”

“A brave one,” Nathanial said. He swallowed, considering his words. “I can only hope that if put to the test, I could give my life to protect you, to protect Arnaud, to protect the people that I love. What sets people of moral integrity apart from the rest is that we do whatever we must to protect those closest to us, however, there is a fine line between killing for those we love, and sacrificing yourself in the process.”

Annabelle was clearly bothered by what he had said, but said nothing, and instead stared out of the greenhouse window. After what felt like forever to Nathanial, she turned to him.

“I think…I need to be alone right now, I appreciate your concern, but I’m going to return to my cabin now.”

Nathanial started to reply, but instead nodded to her, watching her stride across the greenhouse and leave. They would get through this, they always did. Even if she had Bedford, Nathanial would always be protective of her, and he was not going to let her fall into despair and inhumanity.

Chapter Five

“Evidence of Truth Comes from the Senses”

1.

CORNED BEEF! ALWAYS
with the corned beef.
Dégoûtant!
There was only so much that could be made of corned beef, and Arnaud’s stomach was strongly disapproving of those things. Having searched the supplies more extensively, he had been delighted to find all manner of treasures. Turkey bits, liver paste, chicken meats and even tinned sardines; however, Arnaud had opted for the turkey bits.

As he tucked in to the rudimentary yet luxurious meal that he had thrown together, Annabelle walked through the door ever so elegantly.

“Turkey?” she said. “Well I am pleasantly surprised.”

“
Oui
! A fine dish indeed, and enough to share,
mademoiselle
!”

She helped herself to the new found food and took up a seat opposite Arnaud. “How are you and dear Nathanial? I sense things are a little strained between you both.”

Through a mouthful of turkey Arnaud replied; “Well, whatever progress we manage to achieve doubles back on itself due to our disagreements.”

“You and him are still bickering?” He held her look, slightly taken aback by her comment.

“Myself? Well enough. Nathanial however…” He shook his head. “He has been acting slightly strange, have you noticed this at all?” He was careful to adopt a casual tone. The far too intimate conversation between Nathanial and him, though a week past, filled his head too much.

“Yes.” Her response was just a fraction too quick. “I doubt he’d have mentioned it, but we were talking, nearly a week ago now, of our worries about the vortex. Our conversation soon moved onto the events that took place on Ceres.”

Arnaud felt a small dart penetrate his heart. The days spent inside that hollow world had been strenuous and he had not quite put it all behind him. Then he realised what Nathanial must have brought up. “Those were grim times,
ma chère,
” he said gently.

The pair shared a solemn look for a moment.

“I am assuming he mentioned Blayney?”

Annabelle nodded. “He expressed his disapproval on the matter.” Her face was devoid of expression now. “I take no pride in what I did, but he claimed that I showed no remorse.”

Arnaud frowned. That sounded most unlike Nathanial; although he had to confess, to himself at least, that his
confére
had been acting in a strange fashion in the last week. “Don’t take his words to heart, Annabelle.”

“Oh I’ve not, I am just concerned,” she said warmly.

“I must admit, it has bothered me too. I don’t like it, but there is something troubling him. We can barely go an hour without having a disagreement of one sort of another.” Arnaud paused. He was not used to sharing his feelings with other people; he had been brought up to know his own mind, and to act on it. Not discuss it with others before hand, but being cooped up in a box in the aether… “This flyer, too, does not help resolve situations. I am not sure what to say to him. We are good friends,
non
, but he won’t let me help.”

“Just give him a bit of room,” Annabelle offered, and Arnaud nodded slowly. To take advice was not his way, not in personal matters, but Annabelle had known Nathanial for several years now. “I would suggest leaving him be, and try talking to him in the morning.”

Even when Nathanial was acting out of character and behaving like a fool, Annabelle still retained her trust and sympathy for him, and inevitably Arnaud did so, too. What was it about Nathanial that he engendered such trust and loyalty?

“I suppose you are right,” he finally said.

The common room was silent for a minute or so as the two ate their meals.

“You know, when he and I talked of what happened on Ceres, he mentioned something that I’ve been thinking about,” Annabelle said, breaking the silence. Arnaud looked up and raised his eyebrows as an indication for her to continue. “He said that he would sacrifice himself for the ones he loved…” Her voice trailed off and she stared blankly. Arnaud could tell she was slipping back into contemplation of Blayney’s fate. “I am going to return to my cabin. I’ve enjoyed your company.”

On that note, Annabelle made a swift exit, leaving Arnaud with his own thoughts again.

He would sacrifice himself for the ones he loved…
Annabelle’s words echoed in Arnaud’s head, and he was forced to wonder, would Nathanial consider Arnaud someone that he loved?

2.

A CERTAIN DEGREE
of order had been established within the engine room, though it had required double the normal amount of work and resulted in significantly less sleep for Fenn. The strain on the engine was indeed quelled, but only just. For how long, on the other hand, would be anyone’s guess amid the bizarre cosmic turbulence to which they had been increasingly subjected.

He wished that the professor would spend more time helping maintain the engine rather than tinkering in the lab with the Frenchman, though that thought was one that would never be spoken aloud. Professor Stone was, after all, here under the recommendation of Captain Folkard.

As he heard the engine room door swing open behind him, Fenn slouched with relief. As far as he was concerned Stone could not have arrived sooner, as he had been on shift for what seemed like an eternity now.

But it wasn’t Stone, it was the captain himself.

“Does the problem still persist, lad?” Folkard huffed, surprising Fenn with the abrupt question.

Fenn immediately stood to attention, despite his fatigue. “Sorry, sir, I thought you were the professor for a moment there.”

“You are in a bit of a state, aren’t you? Do remember that although you are somewhat secluded back here, you are still serving Her Majesty’s Royal Navy.”