The Gaze of Caprice (The Caprice Trilogy Book 1) (14 page)

Kuandian was a small town, which worked against Xiaoyu because he was never free from his persecutors.  The same bullies that he faced in kindergarten were at his primary school.  But he had grown and grown patient.  He learned that patience was the weapon of the downtrodden.  Persecutors had motive, so the persecuted had to wait for opportunity.  As a child, Xiaoyu became better at exploiting opportunity than most adults.  One week, Baba had been prescribed a medicinal tea as a laxative.  Xiaoyu had switched his own morning green tea with the medicinal tea before Xiaofeng had taken him to school.  He had spent the morning struggling to keep a straight face, as the medicinal tea began to slap his stomach.  By recess there was one small difference in his behavior.  Instead of hurrying to be one of the first out of the classroom, he had been sluggish and was dead last.  He arrived to the schoolyard for recess a full two minutes after the other students.  After recess, the day carried on as normal until the last class.  There was no noticeable difference in Xiaoyu’s behavior all day.  He was patient.  When the last class had ended, he had already packed his book bag and was quickly out the door.  One student had remained in his desk without and serious intent to move.  He had sat humped over his book bag and his face had turned red.  Tears had begun to stream down his face.  The boy was familiar to Xiaoyu.  He was the same boy who had dropped a rock on Xiaoyu’s head over a year earlier.  The boy had stared into his book bag with a horrific look on his face.  Inside the book bag, was a sullied note written in brown crayon.  The note read: 
You always talk about my brown skin it must be your favorite color, a brown gift from me
.  The note was unsigned.  Beneath the note, the contents of the boy’s book bag were soaked in a large amount of human feces. 

Xiaoyu’s patience played like brilliance when the boy’s parents had gotten involved.  Xiaoyu had taken the time to plan carefully.  He wanted revenge but realized when to claim it, so he left the note unsigned.  At the same time, he had wanted to expose the boy as a bully.  The boy told his parents what had happened and they told the school administrator and the teacher.  Xiaoyu had denied doing anything. Mama and Xiaofeng had to meet with the school administrator, the teacher, the boy’s parents, the boy and Xiaoyu.  In the meeting, Xiaoyu showed less emotion than all in the room.  He, more than anyone else, had prepared for that meeting and he had prepared for over a year.  He denied having done anything, but he made a small comment that sent a chill up the spine of all adults in the room and made the other boy feel cornered.  He said, “
There’s no name on the note, but you think it’s me because he says it’s me.  If he thinks so, then the note must be true and he has been talking about someone with brown skin.  And I’m someone with brown skin
.”

              The room had gone silent.  Xiaofeng was reminded of things her mother told her.  Xiaofeng had been told her brother would be different, special.  He would have strength and would need it.  He would be under sustained attack, but he would have the ability to protect himself.  Until that meeting, Xiaofeng had been trying to protect her brother because she believed his strength was the physical kind.  She told herself she would have to wait, until her brother grew strong enough to protect himself.  In one moment, she realized his strength was his ability to endure.  His endurance made him patient. He could wait.  He could wait while he aligned the right forces.  He could wait until he collected the right weapons.  He could wait while he gathered enough chain to bind the world, and then declare his mastery over it.  That is how everyone in the room had felt—bound. Everyone had been bound, except the silent six year-old boy.  The administrator and teacher had no choice but to admit something was going on.  The boy, the bully, had to admit his attacks on Xiaoyu.  At the end of the meeting, all adults had agreed that the boys should try to be friends, Xiaoyu’s silence made it clear that wouldn’t happen.  But he had gained an awkward ally.

              The bully realized dropping a rock on Xiaoyu’s face had gone too far.  He was beyond Xiaoyu’s forgiveness.  But he had realized that any other transgressions would be met with even worse retaliation and he had become convinced that Xiaoyu could accomplish anything.  The bully had learned a valuable lesson—some people were better left alone.  The bully knew he could never be Xiaoyu’s friend, but he made a different decision—to be a harbinger.  The bully had taken it upon himself to warn other children, they would be better off leaving Xiaoyu alone.  A year later, one boy—large for his age—refused to listen.  He had decided his favorite name for Xiaoyu was
Heigui—
Black Devil.  And his classroom seat had been directly behind Xiaoyu’s.  His favorite prank was to flick Xiaoyu’s right ear while, simultaneously, whispering
Heigui
in his left ear.  The boy told himself the combination of physical and verbal abuse would be too much for Xiaoyu and would break him.  The boy had set a goal of making Xiaoyu cry publically, but had grown increasingly frustrated at Xiaoyu’s outward calm.  In fact, he felt Xiaoyu’s calm was humiliating him, after setting the goal of humiliating Xiaoyu.  Despite repeat warnings from the other bully, the harbinger, the boy persisted.  Despite the harbinger, Xiaoyu’s greatest ally proved to be his patience.

Xiaoyu had been studying the habits of the large boy, who liked to flick his ears.  Xiaoyu had noticed one of the boy’s habits and it interested him.  In the mornings, he would sit up and stretch his chubby arms while yawning.  He would do it three or four times before the morning was through.  One Wednesday, the class took a reading comprehension test.  Xiaoyu had made sure to sharpen his pencil before the exam started.  The room was mostly silent, with students facing down focusing on their test work.  The teacher was reading a book, looking up occasionally.  Unlike the other students, Xiaoyu hadn’t written anything on his test paper.  He wanted to keep his pencil sharp.  Almost thirty minutes after the test had begun, Xiaoyu realized what he had waited for.  The desk behind him had shifted forward.  The large boy behind him sat up in his desk to stretch and yawn.  Xiaoyu’s eyes rolled downward and his lips pursed.  As the boy’s mouth opened, Xiaoyu turned around and stabbed the boy in the cheek with his pencil.  The boy had immediately fallen out of his desk and onto the floor.  Xiaoyu had gotten down on the floor next to the boy and asked if he was ok, while taking the boy’s pencil.  The other students and the teacher had surrounded the two boys.  Xiaoyu’s pencil had arrived with such force that it transfixed the boy’s entire cheek and pierced part of his tongue.  The boy had gone into a mild shock and the pencil in his mouth left him unable to speak.  Xiaoyu had told the teacher that he didn’t see what happened but thought the boy had stabbed himself with the pencil.  The boy would later say he didn’t quite remember what had happened, a result of his shock.  The teacher had been suspicious of Xiaoyu, until his harbinger came forward and said he saw the boy stab himself.

Xiaoyu was never proud of his ability to reclaim a situation that started out against him.  He viewed it as necessity.  It was something he did, like eating and sleeping. He didn’t boast about his ability.  Like all young life, he looked forward to his future capability.  He was a wolf cub looking forward to one day hunting with the pack.  But for him there was no pack.  He possessed a preternatural ability to tear clouds and bend winds to serve his purpose.  He was fully capable of surviving on his own, but internally he lamented that he had to.  He was eight years-old and the only friend he had won was his own sister.  Even his mother had abandoned him at birth.  He had accepted that it would have been better for his entire family, if he had never been born.

“
Does a handsome boy feel like eating
?” asked Xiaofeng.

Xiaoyu looked up at his sister and nodded his head.  His eyes were foggy; Xiaofeng couldn’t tell what he was thinking.  When he was younger it was easy for her, but as he grew up these moments were becoming more and more frequent.

“
Who’s that man in there
?” asked Xiaoyu.

“
You don’t remember him
?” asked Xiaofeng.  Xiaoyu shook his head.

“
That’s Uncle Xing, he’s our mother’s brother
,” said Xiaofeng.

“
Is he a good man
?” asked Xiaoyu.

“
He’s very funny; he likes jokes
,” said Xiaofeng.

“
I want to know if he’s a good man
,” said Xiaoyu.

“
He doesn’t come here much. I can’t say I know him so well, but he’s only here for a visit
,” said Xiaofeng, “
Why not go out and meet him
?”

“
There’s something about him
,” said Xiaoyu.

“
What
?” asked Xiaofeng.

“
He’s not who he pretends to be
,” said Xiaoyu.

“
You have to meet him before you say that
,” said Xiaofeng.

“
Everyone is going to end up very hurt by him
,” said Xiaoyu.

“
He’s not going to hurt you, I won’t let him
,” said Xiaofeng.

Xiaoyu looked up at his sister, then looked back down.  Xiaofeng sat down on the bed next to her brother. 

“
Are you OK
?” asked Xiaofeng.

“
Yes
,” said Xiaoyu.

“
You want to come out with me and meet Uncle Xing
?” asked Xiaofeng.

“
Yes, I want to meet him
,” said Xiaoyu.

“
Why have you changed your mind so suddenly
?” asked Xiaofeng.

“
I need to learn about him, if I have to attack him
,” said Xiaoyu.

“
Why would you have to attack him
?” asked Xiaofeng.

“
Go ask him that
,” said Xiaoyu.

Five minutes later Xiaofeng emerged from the bedroom with her brother and came to the main room.  Xiaoyu followed behind her in a blue T-shirt and flannel shorts.  Xiaofeng grabbed two pair of chopsticks and gave one pair to Xiaoyu.  Xiaofeng sat down at the table next to Li Xing and Xiaoyu sat between Xiaofeng and Mama.  Mama put rice in a small bowl for Xiaoyu, which he handed to Xiaofeng.   Mama made another bowl with rice which Xiaoyu kept for himself.  Mama made sure Xiaoyu wasn’t last to be served.  If she didn’t serve him, he wouldn’t have served himself.  Xiaoyu waited until everyone else started to eat before picking up his chopsticks.  When he was guaranteed that no one was looking at him, he began to eat.

“
What are you studying at Qingshan
?” asked Li Xing.

“
Economics
,” said Xiaofeng.

“
You like it
?” asked Li Xing.

“
It makes sense
,” said Xiaofeng.

“
Not always
,” said Li Xing.

“
What do you mean
?” asked Xiaofeng.

“
Well, it depends on who you are
,” said Li Xing.

“
How so
?” asked Xiaofeng.

“
Well the economics for the boss is always different than economics for the guy on the ground
,” said Li Xing. 

“
How would you know that
?” said Baba,
“
You’ve never been the boss
.”

“
You always know when you work for the boss
,” said Li Xing, “
You see what he wears and what you wear and he wears the better clothes.  That’s Hong Kong.  You see what the boss drives and maybe you take the bus.  That’s economics
.”

“
What do you do in Hong Kong
?” asked Xiaofeng.

“
I’m an assistant manager at a factory
,” said Li Xing.

“
What type of factory
?” asked Xiaofeng.

“
We process seafood and wholesale
,” said Li Xing.

“
You sell to restaurants
?” asked Xiaofeng

“
Very little, we mostly sell to hotels
,” said Li Xing. 

“
So you’re really in the hotel business
,” said Xiaofeng.

“
Sort of
,” said Li Xing.

“
Well, the hotels buy from you, so your business depends on the hotels’ business
,” said Xiaofeng.

“
The hotel market in Hong Kong is solid, trust me
,” said Li Xing. 

“
How was your day Xiaoyu
?” asked Mama.  Xiaoyu looked up from his bowl of food and looked around the table before speaking.

“
It was ok
,” said Xiaoyu.  Mama knew better than to pry too much, but she wanted the boy to get used to speaking to people besides his sister.  She worried about him becoming a social misfit.