The General and the Horse-Lord (18 page)

Gabriel put his cup of coffee down. “I also think you should both consider using the media. We’ve got that hot-dog investigative reporter downtown, Charlie Green, and you know he would splash word of a cover-up at the university and on the board of supervisors all over hell and back. That would bring about a change, no question. And that’s what we’re going for, right? A change in the current way of doing business?”

“Yes,” John agreed. “But. You know he would want to talk to the boys and none of them have agreed to this. Seems to me unlikely they would agree. I don’t want them hounded or made to play the victim.”

“Something to consider, we could invite him to whatever Kim is planning at Ho Ho’s. I think it would be worth thinking about, because this isn’t a private affair. It’s affecting our families more than most, but this community supports the university. It depends on the university being run with an eye to the safety and education of the children. I don’t see that happening, and the community has a stake in seeing things change.”

“He sounds just like a politician, don’t he? You’re a good talker, boy.” Cody Dial put his ball cap back on, winked at Gabriel, and went into the kitchen to peek through the door into the garage, where Billy was sleeping.

“Good God.” Gabriel said after Cody Dial left, rolling his shoulders. Looked to John like he was getting ready for battle. “I wonder if we’re ever going to see Brian Walker in one piece again? Okay, forget I said that. What have you got on your plate today?”

“I need to proof the article for
Monocle
and send it in.”

“I told Juan I would take him up in the chopper this afternoon after school. He agreed to work harder on the algebra.”

“You want me to have another go with the tutoring?”

“You up for it? We could meet at Ho Ho’s after we take a spin. Kim offered to take a picture of the two of us. Juan said, ‘Yeah, great, we can call it a picture of me and my dad, the year he ruined my life.’”

“Maybe I’m not the best person to do this.”

“I don’t know, John. I don’t seem to have any idea what he needs me to do. I can’t quite get my mind around not knowing what to do. I mean, he was always my little shadow, you know? He’s been glued to my leg since he could crawl. I don’t want to think this is going to change things between us for good. But it might. I didn’t really think how it was gonna look to him. I wanted a quiet divorce. I never thought Martha would throw this in my face, make it public. I should have lied when she asked me, but you always said lying backfires, and I wouldn’t have felt right about it. About denying what was going on.”

“You mean, make you and me public? To the kids?”

He nodded. “I wasn’t quite ready for that. I didn’t know what to say, and it wasn’t just my privacy at issue. I didn’t say anything to Martha that would make her assume I was leaving her for you. I mean, I wasn’t. It wasn’t like that. I was leaving because I couldn’t… I couldn’t lie anymore about my heart.” Gabriel grinned, a little sadly. “About the nature of the beast. Martha decided the kids ought to know, because she knew it would hurt me to see them upset. And it did. So now Juan’s fourteen and trying to get his mind around the idea his dad’s gay. Kim he’s cool with. I mean, Kim is wild and flamboyant and colorful, and Juan has always looked up to him, so anything he wants to do is cool. But he was not expecting me to be gay and he doesn’t like it and he’s secretly wondering if this might be hereditary. He’s known you his whole life, and now you are not the person he thought you were, either. Just like me.”

“Adults are not supposed to change like this, out of the blue. I’m sorry it happened this way. But Gabriel, I’m not sure there’s anything we can do about it now.”

“We shouldn’t have had to pretend our whole lives. Always on the down-low. Always watching our backs. We can’t get that time back, John. You know I loved the army like I love the air I breathe, but, Jesus, what a cost. If we had been honest from the very beginning….”

“If we had, you wouldn’t have had the kids at all.”

Gabriel stood up, pulled John into his arms. “No, you’re right. You’re right. They make it all okay. Maybe it cost us twenty-five years, but they are irreplaceable. Don’t you think? And you and me? We have plenty of time.”

J
OHN
worked on the article in the quiet of his office and wondered what was happening. No one called him, though, so he suspected things had not reached a crisis point. Either that, or he had become entirely inconsequential to everyone. Kim and Billy went off to class, and Gabriel went to work. He enjoyed the writing, wondered if this solitary and quiet occupation was going to be the one he finished his life with. It was hard to imagine, after being one of the favorite thinkers and problems solvers for the JCS. But times changed. He felt like what he needed to do most was help Gabriel through this next year. Work on the two of them becoming a couple, becoming a family, rather than just two independent men who loved on the down-low.

He walked over to the third bedroom, looked inside. He had some exercise gear and file boxes stored against the far wall. They would be easy to move to the shed. Hard to imagine the walls painted lavender, with little rainbow ponies or whatever Martie might be interested in. He thought she was probably into ponies. Maybe unicorns.

He had the bedroom cleared and his article proofed and emailed to the magazine by early afternoon. He wandered outside, saw that Gabriel had put potting soil into little pots in the cold frame. He couldn’t tell if there were any seeds, though. Kim called and saved him from himself. “Yo, I’m on my way to get you! What are you wearing?”

“Clothes.”

“Make sure you look good. I’m taking a picture of the Horse-Lord in his flight suit.”

That was the most interesting bit of news John had heard all day. “Just honk when you get here.”

He looked down at himself. Jeans and a chambray shirt that was faded to a soft color between blue and gray, just the color of his eyes. Maybe this would be his retirement uniform. He ran a hand over his chin and his tongue over his teeth. He’d do.

Kim studied him with dismay when he got into the car. “What is this new look? You’re like an unemployed Mr. Greenjeans. You haven’t been messing around with the cold frame, have you? We already planted the seeds.”

“Where’s Billy?”

“I haven’t seen him since I dropped him off for class. I think he’s going to meet up with his dad later. He said he didn’t think his dad was up for Ho Ho’s, so I don’t know if I’ll see him tonight. I told him he had a bed for as long as he needed one, but I think Mr. Dial is probably going to haul him off to the Holiday Inn until he can convince him to go home. That’s my theory.” Kim drummed his fingers against the steering wheel. “Why don’t you let me take a picture of you and the Horse-Lord together?”

“Why?”

“Because that’s what couples do. Real art photography, it says something more than the simple subject of the picture. I want to see if the two of you are… I don’t know how to say it. Melding.” Kim lifted his hands from the steering wheel and showed what he meant. John thought it looked like he was pulling saltwater taffy. “It’s part of your coming out. Photographs of the lovers together, that’s one of the things men of your generation missed.”

“If I agree to this, will you stop talking?”

“Probably not,” Kim said, with what John thought was a particularly inane grin, “but I’ll try.”

When they got to the airfield, Gabriel was head down in the cockpit and Juan was sitting cross-legged on the tarmac, playing a Nintendo, his back to the chopper. Gabriel looked tired, but the flight suit brought back so many happy memories that John went into his arms and kissed him. Gabriel looked pleased, kept an arm around John’s shoulders while he showed him the chopper. He had a painting on the nose of a great silver-white warhorse with big black eyes, and he told the story of Torii Motoada, the samurai who died to protect his lord. Juan rolled his eyes, unimpressed. Kim was working the camera, taking some snaps of the two of them together, and Gabriel pulled John back against him, bent over, and kissed him on the neck. He looked over at Juan, then looked away. “You want to fly with me? I’m about ready to blow this pop stand.”

John turned into him, wrapped his arms around Gabriel’s waist. “Yeah, I’ll go with you. Anytime.” He looked at the little helicopter. It was an MD-500, and looked like a plastic toy next to the Apache attack helo Gabriel had always flown.

Gabriel smiled then, and Kim said, “Hey, Uncle John! Look at me for a mo, okay?” When John looked at him, Kim took the photo, then smiled at them over the top of his camera. “Yeah, I got it. I am so frigging good, it’s scary. Hey, Juan, come to Ho Ho’s with me? I’ll drive real fast, and we can leave these two old guys in the dust.”

Gabriel kept his arms around John’s shoulders. John looked up at him. “You want to go? Fire that pony up.”

“Don’t tempt me. I might just keep going. We’d be like the gay, retired army version of Thelma and Louise, in a helicopter.” His face was a mix of sorrow and mad that John had never seen before. “That little shit said he didn’t want to fly with me!”

The phone rang in John’s pocket. The caller ID said Cody Dial.

Chapter 14

F
ATHER
and son Dial agreed to meet at Ho Ho’s. “I heard some interesting things today, General. I thought I might pass them on to you. Then I’m going to pack up my boy and take him home.”

“Did you see Brian Walker?”

“See, that’s one of those interesting things. Seems he’s disappeared. Had a leave of absence approved by the president without the dean’s knowledge, and he’s taking a little mental health break in some unknown locale.”

“I see.” John felt the mad creeping up his neck. “I’ll speak to you soon.”

Gabriel was staring at him, eyes narrowed. “Uh, oh. What’s happened? The general looks like he’s doing some calculations.”

“Wainright bought our boy a ticket out of town before Fox got a chance to fire him. Prentiss Walker must own a big chunk of his ass.”

Ho Ho’s looked even more seedy and depressed than usual, the windows and serving counters smudged and greasy. The women behind the glass counter were having some dispute in Vietnamese whenever they passed each other, their faces stiff. Kim was uncharacteristically silent, head down over his wok, and young Juan was wiping down tables and not looking at anyone. He was wearing a sticker on his apron that said
volunteer
.

Cody Dial looked slowly around the restaurant, and then he pulled up a chair. “What the hell kind of name is Ho Ho’s? You think it’s somebody’s idea of a joke?”

John shook his head. “Sometimes ideas don’t translate well.” Kim brought a large teapot and a pile of little cups. John took them from his hands, passed them around.

Billy looked even smaller today, his face darkening to the color of an ugly thunderstorm. He seemed on the verge of weeping. Cody kept a hand on the back of his chair.

“So the professor has split town, destination unknown. I was in George Fox’s office today. Wainright was there, and they got into a screaming fight half the university must have heard. Fox resigned, threw his resignation letter in Wainright’s face, and Wainright said something like ‘that son of a bitch Mitchel, I am going to screw that little army prick into the ground.’ I got the feeling he was talking about you, General.” Cody was showing his teeth in a ferocious little grin. John felt himself doing the same.

Gabriel pulled out a memo pad and started making notes. “John, we need to move quickly. You two decide right now, media or no?”

John and Cody looked at each other, and then at Billy. He was staring down at the table, his bottom lip caught between his teeth. They both shook their heads no.

“Then we need to go to Santa Fe in the morning.”

“Dad, we can’t go home yet. Please, just until me and Kim have our art show, okay?” It was Billy, speaking up for the first time.

“What is this art show?”

“We’re doing a special art show here at Ho Ho’s. Please, it’s really important. Dad, it’s important to me. It’s only a week. We can stay that long, can’t we? Then I’ll go home with you.”

For the first time, Cody Dial seemed a little unsure. He looked at John and Gabriel, but Billy tugged on his sleeve. “Dad, this is how me and Kim want to handle things. Why don’t you listen to us? This has something to do with us, you know? And we feel like we know how to make things right. I think all of you ought to give us a chance.”

“Okay, son. A week, then home before your mother has a conniption fit.”

Gabriel was shaking his head, and John reached out, put his hand on Gabriel’s arm. “Let’s go home. We’ve got some work to do.” He stood up, offered Cody Dial his hand. “I’ll call on you if I may.”

“Yes, sir. Anytime.”

Juan stared at them from across the restaurant, and Gabriel walked over to talk to him, but Juan turned away, started wiping down tables he’d already cleaned. Gabriel’s jaw was tight when he walked out of the restaurant. He shook his head. “What in the hell is going on with that kid?” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “We got no time for that now. We need to be in touch with Lathrop tonight. Have you talked to him?”