The Girlfriend (Single Wide Female in Love, Book 2) (13 page)

“Aren’t you going to take your shirt off? I took mine off.”
 

“I don’t know. Do you think I should?”
 

He didn’t answer. He just lifted it off for me. It was odd to be undressing in a strange place. But with Max there I felt better about it.

I sprawled out across the mat. I didn’t take my bra off. But once Max straddled me he released the clasp so that he could rub oil on my back. I tensed at first. It was unusual for me to not try to cover up when someone was looking at me.

As I felt his weight against my hips and the cool air against my bare skin, I suddenly understood what it was to be vulnerable. I had exposed my heart to him, and I had exposed my body to him. His fingertips roamed across my skin as if they were trying to map out every freckle, every dimple, every imperfection that I’d memorized. I felt fully known by Max as he took his time with the massage.

My body began to relax. My mind followed suit. All of a sudden I felt tears in my eyes. They weren’t tears of sorrow, but tears of closeness. I felt more connected with Max than I had since that first day we kissed.

It was me that had put up the wall when our relationship moved from friendship to romance, not Max. It was me that had started to fill the role of girlfriend, rather than just being who I was.
 

“Oh, Max, I’m so sorry.”

 
“Sh. You have nothing to be sorry for.” His voice was as soft as the glow of the candles.
 

“Yes, I do. You’re right. I have been hiding from you.”

His fingers kneaded deeper against my lower back. “You might have tried, but you can’t hide from me, Sammy.”
 

“I tried to be your girlfriend, instead of just being me.”
 

“I know.” He rubbed his hands up along my back all the way to my shoulders and down again. I shuddered with euphoria at the sensation he created. It was more powerful than anything I’d ever felt. “But I still saw you. I never wanted anyone or anything but you, Sammy. I can’t make you see that. You have to find a way to trust me.”
 

“I do trust you, Max. I do.”
 

He smiled and leaned down to kiss the top of my head. “Then trust us, Sammy. Trust what we have now and what we will always have.”
 

All of my desire to propose to him faded. I didn’t want to ask him. I never had. I wanted him to ask me. But I’d been afraid that he wouldn’t.

After feeling the way he caressed my body and hearing the love in his voice, I knew that he would. Maybe it didn’t make sense to me—why Max would want me instead of any other woman—but it didn’t need to make sense. It was the truth.

I turned over under him and we spent the remainder of our session snuggled up on the mat.

Chapter 29

After our couple’s massage, Max and I went out to dinner. I didn’t care that I was still glistening with oil. Neither did he. I could talk with ease to him again. We discussed where I was at with my book and a little bit about his work.
 

“Do you ever wish we could just take off together, Max?” The question fell from my lips without my taking the time to think about it.
 

“Where?”
 

“Anywhere. I mean, just explore the world. With my writing, now I can travel any time I like.”
 

“My job is a little more limiting.” He frowned. “But we could always work around that. I’d go anywhere with you.”
 

“Europe?”
 

“Europe? That’s a big one.” He laughed. “Why not China?”

“China could work.” I nodded. “I catch myself forgetting sometimes just how huge this world is and how many people there are that I’ll never have the chance to meet. There are places on this planet that I bet no one has ever been to—at least no one that we know about. That’s a great mystery, don’t you think?”
 

“It is.” He smiled and took my hand. “I’d love to explore the world with you. When do we start?”
 

There it was again, an opening for me to ask him to marry me. I could tell him that we could start right after he said yes. I held my breath and considered it. But the moment passed when I exhaled.
 

“That’s up to you, Max. You’re the one with the job, remember?” I winked at him.
 

“Don’t remind me. It’s been a little much to handle lately. Nothing but pressure.”
 

“Really? Why haven’t you told me about it?”
 

“You were busy.” He shrugged. “Besides, there’s nothing to do about it, really. I just have to adjust to the new policies.”
 

“Max, I want you to tell me when something is stressing you out.”
 

“I will—promise.”
 

After the meal, Max drove me back to my car. We lingered there for a few moments and shared several kisses.
 

“Will you meet me for lunch tomorrow?” He met my eyes. “No excuses?”
 

“No excuses.” I smiled. “I’ll be there.”
 

“Great.” He squeezed my hand. I felt my spirits lift. It was wonderful to know that he wanted to be with me so often.

That night as I worked on my book I decided I needed a routine to keep me focused. Not just a routine for my writing, but for my exercises and spiritual endeavors as well. I planned to start the next morning. I would do some yoga when I woke up to get me going. I would work for a few hours. Then I would go for a run to the diner to meet Max.

I finally felt calm as I went to bed that night. I was no longer aching for Max to propose. I knew that he would when he was ready. I was no longer tormenting myself with my own flaws. I knew that Max loved me as I was and for who I was—and that I could love me too, if I tried.

When I woke up the next morning I felt better than ever. I went through the process of my yoga DVD—this time without earbuds.

Then I sent a text to Stephanie.
 

Thanks for talking me down from the ledge. I didn’t go through with my plan. I’m really glad I listened to you.
 

Trust me, Samantha, when the time is right, it will work out.
 

I took her words as inspiration. I’d been trying to force something that wasn’t meant to be forced.
 

After getting some work done on the book, I took the time to change into my most comfortable sweatsuit. Sure, it was threadbare and saggy in the wrong places, but it was also my favorite outfit to run in. The diner was only a few blocks away, so it wasn’t like I was running a marathon.

As I took off running for the diner, I savored the feel of the wind against my face. I hadn’t realized how much I missed that sensation of freedom. I’d been neglecting the parts of me that needed my attention, while focusing on something that I had no control over.

I ran fast. I wanted to leave behind all of my insecurities, all of my worries, and get to the real me—the Samantha that was far too used to being hidden away.

By the time I reached the diner my chest was tight and my legs ached. I could feel the sweat trickling down my back. The run had done me good in many ways, but I might have pushed myself a little too hard. I felt dizzy and exhausted.

I paused outside the diner and pulled out my phone. I thought about texting Max to cancel. I knew he wouldn’t care about my workout gear or my sweat, but all I wanted to do was crawl into bed. Before I could type out a text, Max walked up to me from the other end of the sidewalk.
 

“Sammy, you look beautiful.” He kissed my cheek.
 

“If you say so.” I grinned at him. I knew that when I caught a glimpse of Max covered in sweat from moving things, working out, or playing on the beach, I did find his glistening body attractive. Maybe he thought the same thing about my sweat-dampened hair and flushed cheeks.
 

“I’m starving. Are you ready to eat?”
 

“Absolutely.”
 

He held the door open for me and we stepped inside.

Chapter 30

The lunchtime crowd was pretty slim. Our usual waitress smiled at us as we entered. She pointed to our usual table. I noticed that there was someone sitting close to our table, even though the rest of the diner was pretty empty.
 

“Should we sit somewhere else?” I frowned. I didn’t want to offend anyone with my sweaty state.
 

“No, this table is good.” Max steered me to it.

Once we were settled he picked up the menu. I sat back and watched him for a moment. At any other restaurant his perusing the menu would not have been strange. But we had been to the diner so many times that we didn’t even need menus.
 

“What can I get you guys today?”
 

Mandy, the waitress, grinned at us. I smiled back. It always brightened my dining experience when the waiter or waitress was friendly.
 

“My usual. I think Max is looking for something new, though.”
 

“Nope, just a cheeseburger.” He handed her his menu.

I shook my head and took a sip of the water that Mandy left behind on the table.
 

“One of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do was wait this long to do this…” Max smiled at me. His hands fluttered nervously. “But I wanted it to be on this exact date, and I couldn’t imagine doing it any other way.”
 

I had no idea what he meant. What was so special about today? I watched as he stood up from the table.
 

“Max?”
 

He smiled again. He reached out and took my hand. I could feel that his palm was sweating a little. As he kneeled down, our favorite song began to play. It was as if the universe conspired to make that moment special—or perhaps it was Mandy.

I could barely take a breath, as I was afraid to get my hopes up. He couldn’t be, could he? With me dressed like I was, with my hair a mess, with my heart leaping out of my chest? Don’t do it, Sammy, I warned myself. Don’t get your hopes up. This is just like the last two times.
 

“Sammy, you are the most important person in the world to me. I close my eyes, and I see your smile. I can’t think of a single good memory since college that hasn’t involved you. My only regret is that it took me so long to discover my true feelings for you. That’s why today is special. Because one year ago today, we sat at this table, and even though I was here with Stephanie, I looked into your eyes and I knew. It finally dawned on me that I was madly, deeply, and eternally in love with you.”
 

I gasped. I hadn’t even remembered that day. I knew that it had happened, but I had no idea that Max’s feelings had changed so suddenly.
 

“Oh, Max.” I smiled at him with tears in my eyes.
 

“So I chose today, to show you just how much I want you to be a permanent part of my life. You’ve been a part of my past and my present, and I want to know that you will always be a part of my future.” He reached into his pocket.

It’s just a necklace, Samantha. Don’t think it’s a ring. It’s not a ring. It’s not a ring.

He pulled out a black jewelry box. He flipped the lid open and looked up at me.
 

“It’s a ring!” I didn’t expect those words to pop out of my mouth. A few people around us laughed, and so did Max.
 

“It’s your ring, Sammy. Will you marry me?”
 

Hearing those words caused my head to spin. I paused long enough to discern with certainty whether I was in a dream or not. Max squeezed my hand and pulled me out of my trance.
 

“Yes! Yes, I will! A million times I will!”
 

“No, only once.” He grinned and plucked the ring out of the box. “Because now that we’ve finally found our way into each other’s hearts, I know, I trust, I am certain, that we will never part ways again.”
 

I stared down at the sparkling diamond that glistened up at me. I didn’t notice its cut or clarity. I didn’t notice the setting. I only saw that it fit perfectly.
 

“Max, I love you!” I stood up in the same moment that he did, and we narrowly avoided knocking heads.

He grabbed my face gently and pulled my lips to his for a long passionate kiss. I was distantly aware that people were applauding and cheering around us. Someone was also taking pictures.

I knew then that Max had planned all of this. He had taken the time to make sure that it was perfect and meaningful. My heart felt as if it would burst with joy.

Only a year before I’d believed that I would never even kiss Max. Now everything had changed.

Now when I looked into his eyes, I didn’t see my best friend who would never return my love. I saw Max, my fiancée—Max, my future husband—Max, the love of my life.
 

Please enjoy the following preview for
 
The Fiancée (Single Wide Female in Love, Book 3)

Chapter 1