Authors: Martina Cole
He had a feeling that would be the clincher, and his mother was looking happier already. Her and her fucking food, it would kill her in the end.
‘Michael . . . You won’t leave me for them, will you? Promise me, darling.’
He shook his head and hugged her tightly. She smelled of Chanel No. 5 and stale sweat.
‘’Course not, but I needed to see my dad. Jenny is all right, Mum. She isn’t like you would think.’ He felt her stiffen in his arms then and he knew he had said the wrong thing. ‘What I mean to say is that I tolerate her for my dad.’
Caroline Moran was terrified of losing this son of hers and she knew she had to keep him on side. The only way she could do that was to go along with whatever it was he wanted.
‘God help me. I love you, Mum, but you can’t half be hard work at times.’
She smiled at him then, and he wiped her eyes and brought her a huge piece of cake. He had said what he wanted to and the world hadn’t ended. As he watched his mother eating he wondered if Cain Junior was in a better place now. He certainly hoped so.
Cain and Jenny were both spent as they basked in the afterglow of their lovemaking. Jenny could not believe that her Cain was here with her – that she could touch him and smell him like this. It was as though they had never been apart. She felt tears gather in her eyes and he held her even tighter.
‘What a fucking day.’
Jenny didn’t answer him. She didn’t know what to say.
‘That fat cunt turning up and all. Fuck me, I swerved a bullet there, girl!’ Jenny laughed despite herself, as he had hoped she would. ‘At least the baby is all right.’
Jenny settled herself so she could look into his face and said, ‘If it’s a boy she is going to name him Cain.’
‘She’s a nice girl, Jen, I like her. Good family too.’
Jenny nodded her agreement. ‘He was lucky to have her, but – oh, Cain! – the pain I feel in my heart makes me think I will never know another truly happy day again.’
She started sobbing again and Cain held her and soothed her, willing himself not to cry too. He had to be strong for her.
‘Only another few years and we will be back together for good. Keep your mind on that, darling. We have had our fair share of trouble, but we’ve got this far and we are still here and tight as any two people could possibly be.’
Jenny knew that was true. ‘Cain?’
He kissed her head gently and answered, ‘What, darling?’
‘Can we give it all up now: the business, everything? Can we just be like normal people? We have plenty of money and I don’t want this any more. It’s taken you and our son from me. This isn’t the Good Life, darling. It hasn’t been for a long time.’
He digested her words before finally saying, ‘If that is what you want, then that is what we will do. I will sort out selling everything off, OK?’
‘Do you promise me?’
He looked into her lovely eyes and smiled as he said, ‘I promise you, Jen.’
She was as lovely now as she had been when he had first seen her in that Soho pub all those years ago. If he had known then everything that would happen between them, would he have embarked upon the same course? The answer to that question was simple: he would not change a day. He loved Jenny with all his heart and soul, just as she loved him. They were meant to be and that was all there was to it. They fell asleep finally in each other’s arms and, for the first time in nearly twenty years, they held each other like a normal couple.
Eileen lay in bed alone and wondered at her daughter and Cain together in the next room. She knew she could never have waited that long for anyone. It wasn’t in her nature; a six-week romance was enough before her eye would start to wander and she was on to the next one. She felt so sorry for her Jenny today, burying her only child. It was a terrible thing for any woman to have to do. At least there would be a grandchild – that was something.
Eileen welled up as she remembered Cain Junior climbing on her lap when he was little, always holding her hand or giving her a kiss. He had been such an affectionate child. She thought of how her Jenny had loved him and played with him. Eileen had actually enjoyed being with the child, and that was something that had never appealed to her before. She wished that things had been different while Jenny was growing up, and that she had understood sooner a child’s need for parental love. Jenny had put up with her mother’s drinking and her bringing men back for money and had even been taken into care on occasion. Yet that girl still wanted her in her life, and still gave her the affection that she now craved. Life was a funny thing all right, there was no denying it.
She picked up her grandson’s photo and kissed it lovingly. At least she had done right by him, even if she had struggled to look after her Jenny. She was rightly proud of her for coming through the worst the world could throw at her and surviving it all. It was no mean feat. Eileen Riley liked to think her daughter had inherited that strength from her. After all, she must have got it from somewhere.
Jenny had made Cain and the POs a huge cooked breakfast before Cain had to leave and go back to Parkhurst. After the men had departed, Jenny ran herself a bath and locked the bathroom door before gratefully easing her tired and aching body into the hot water. She lay back with a large mug of tea and a packet of cigarettes, savouring the memories of the night before. She knew they would have to keep her going for a long time. It had been so wonderful to breathe in Cain’s smell – to feel his touch all over her – and it had taken some of the heartache out of a terrible day.
She closed her eyes and, thinking once more of her gorgeous son and the life he had lived under her care, she cried bitter tears. She knew, though, that as long as she had Cain Moran beside her she could cope with anything life might throw at her. He had done the one thing she had asked of him, taking out Jason Biggs, and she hoped that bastard had died in the knowledge that it was retribution for her boy’s murder. For the first time in her life she’d wanted revenge and Cain had made sure she’d got it.
There was a part of her that blamed Cain for their son’s death, though she knew she could do nothing about it. There was no denying that his lifestyle had been the cause of every major upheaval in their lives together. Now she needed to concentrate on healing. That was what she had learned as a child under the erratic care of Eileen Riley: if you waited long enough, things generally got better. At the very least, they couldn’t get any worse. It would take time but she trusted that eventually it wouldn’t hurt so much and that life would go on.
God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes.
Revelation 21:4 (
King James Bible
)
David Hannan was a happy lad. Cain Moran had been quite friendly and talkative as they had driven away from Parkhurst, asking the young man questions about his mum and dad and his beautiful daughter Mae. It had been a dream come true to be entrusted with picking up the infamous Cain Moran from the nick. They had arrived at Joe Biggs’s offices so Cain could pop in to thank the man for the lift.
Joe Biggs felt nervous as he heard Cain Moran walking through the office. He was being hailed by all and sundry and that annoyed him. This was his business now, not Cain’s, and it had been since the cunt killed Jason. He kept a smile plastered across his face and tried to look calm and business-like.
Cain walked into the office as if he owned the place and Joe was amazed at the sheer size of the man. He seemed to fill the entire place with his bulk. It was all muscle too, old as he was, but that was all down to the gym in the nick. There was fuck-all else to do there, everyone knew that.
‘Joe. Good to see you, mate.’
Cain held out his hand and Joe Biggs shook it nervously.
‘Drop of Scotch?’
Cain laughed then. ‘Is the fucking Pope a Catholic, you cunt?’ He sounded jovial but there an underlying threat there that wasn’t lost on Joe Biggs.
Joe poured the drinks and handed one to Cain. ‘I hear you’ve become quite the chef in the nick. Every time I see an ex-con from Parkhurst all I hear about are your fucking cooking skills.’
It was said as a joke but the intended insult was evident. Cooking was women’s work as far as Joe Biggs was concerned.
‘It was the best thing I ever done. I am thinking of opening a restaurant, in fact.’
Joe Biggs was a bit taken aback at that and it showed. ‘I see. I wondered if you would be coming back into the Life . . .’
Cain held up his hands and the man stopped talking. ‘Look, Joe, I came here to tell you first that I am out of it all now and have been for a long time. After my boy . . . Well, let’s just say I’ve lost the heart for it. I promised my old woman that I would leave it all behind and that’s what I’m doing.’
He swallowed his drink down and held his glass out for a refill. Joe Biggs obliged without even thinking about it. Cain had a way of intimidating others even when he was being the nice guy, and he was using that to full advantage now.
He continued, ‘I took your brother out, and now you’ve taken his place down in the Smoke. You should know that I have a lot of friends here and in Manchester including your father-in-law, Graham Grange, who I have known for over forty years. Even in Parkhurst I heard that you’re handy with your fists where your wife is concerned and I will tell you now: the day your wife doesn’t want you any more is the day you die. Graham Grange loathes you but while his daughter is still enamoured, there’s nothing he can do. Make sure it stays that way. If you ever feel the urge to avenge your brother’s death, after he arranged my own boy’s murder, I will rip your fucking head off with my bare hands. Without Jason and Jack, you and your brother are worth nothing. If you are after payback I will come out of my retirement and I will hunt you down like a fucking dog. I will make it my purpose in life to fucking find you, torture you and kill you. You know I am capable of it, mate. I am just trying to avoid a confrontation here. So, are we good?’
Joe Biggs knew that he had just lost the fight, the war and any respect he might have had from Cain. He nodded his head. The last thing he wanted was this cunt on his tail, especially if he was an old mate of his father-in-law.
Cain swallowed down his drink and, standing up, offered his hand in a friendly gesture. ‘Let’s call it quits, shall we?’
Cain held Joe’s hand in a tight grip, reminding him of exactly who he was dealing with. He might be out of the Life, but he wasn’t completely out of the game; there was a big difference. With that he left the offices, whistling cheerfully, and got back into the car with young David Hannan, announcing in a pseudo-posh voice, ‘Home, James, and don’t spare the horses.’
As they drove away it occurred to Cain Moran that he would miss the buzz of the Good Life. But it was over for him now. He had a lot of making up to do with his wife, who had stood by him through everything life had thrown at them. If he had learned nothing else, he had learned to get his priorities right. It was a mistake he would never make again.
As Jenny opened the door to her husband, her heart was in her mouth. She couldn’t believe he was actually here for good. Cain walked into the flat and looked around, noting the place where his son had died. In spite of everything, Jenny had not been able to bring herself to leave their home where she had so many memories of her son’s life.
‘Come in, darling. Come through.’
After all this time they were both a little nervous of each other. He could have cried.
‘I redecorated throughout, Cain. I thought it would be nice for us to start afresh, you know . . .’
Throwing down his bag, he picked her up in his arms and carried her towards the bedroom saying, ‘Give us a quick flash and a bacon sandwich! I have waited a long time for this, girl.’ He kissed her hard and she responded as he knew she would.
Suddenly the door to the lounge opened, and his little grandson, Cain, threw himself against his legs.
Eileen, who was standing behind him, said archly, ‘You have waited long enough, you two, another couple of hours won’t fucking kill you.’
With that they walked into the room where all the people they loved had gathered together to welcome Cain home. He knew that, no matter what, they would be all right. They had a great love that had survived the worst life could have thrown at them. Even Molly was grinning her head off, and Linda was also there with her mum and dad. It was a real homecoming. What more could a man ask for?
As his son Michael came over and hugged him, Cain felt the first real sting of tears. They had lost and gained so much, and that was what the Good Life was all about. Looking around, Cain understood that he would never be a part of it again, and he felt content at that thought. He pulled his wife into his arms and kissed her again as everyone smiled and clapped.
Little Cain, his father and grandfather’s double, shouted, ‘Granddad’s kissing my nanny!’
Cain Moran and Jenny Riley knew that this was all they needed for the future. The worst was over; they just had to live the rest of their lives, together on the out. They had waited long enough for this, now it was time to enjoy it.