The Governor's Sons (13 page)
Read The Governor's Sons Online
Authors: Maria McKenzie
Could she really be committed to him as a “wife” that better fit the description of a mistress or a kept woman?
That seemed so tawdry.
Mama would be ashamed, and Daddy--he’d just want to put a rifle to Ash’s head.
But this was the South, and if she wanted to be with him, that’s what she’d have to settle for.
It didn’t seem fair, though.
Everything in this relationship would be to his advantage.
But what about her, she deserved something—and not just the money he’d provide.
Lawyers—cool headed, analytical and slick—that’s what they were, and she resented them; and right now, though not
yet
a lawyer, she resented Ash.
From a family of lawyers and politicians, he knew the tricks of the trade.
Ash had mentioned that he was a champion debater in college.
She could’ve guessed that, he could argue his way around anything.
Kitty couldn’t debate worth much, and she could never win an argument against him.
But she could try—if she used herself as a bargaining chip.
While lost in thought, Kitty was unaware that Ash had joined her at the window.
When he placed a hand on her shoulder, she looked up to him.
“Ash, you want me to give up everything for you.
But what can you do for me—and I don’t mean money.
What can you do for my people—my race?”
Ash studied her face for a moment before he spoke.
“What are you talking about?”
“Don’t play stupid with me.
You know what I’m getting at.
You’re gonna be a lawyer one day—you got your sights set on being the governor.
Do something.
Change the laws.”
Ash said nothing.
His eyes rolled to the left as he began to formulate his thoughts.
To Kitty it looked like he was flipping through a mental file box; a calculating tool for any aspiring attorney.
Now in S for “Seduction,” he was probably flipping back to P for “Politics.”
“Kitty,” Ash gently squeezed her shoulder, “Negroes have what they need.”
“No we don’t!”
She shrugged his hand away.
“We can’t even sit at the lunch counter and eat a hot dog at the five and dime!”
“But why would you even want to?
That food’s not healthy, and those blasted hot dogs’ll kill you!”
“Ash!
You know what I’m
really
getting at!
We—colored folks--live in this country but we can’t even vote!
That’s not fair!”
“But what can I do?
I didn’t make the rules.”
“Then remake the rules!
Look, Ash, I’ll give myself to you—and give up everything—if you promise me—that one day—you’ll make a difference for me and my race.”
Ash was quiet for a few seconds.
“Okay.”
Kitty smirked.
“That doesn’t sound too convincing.
You’re not just saying that to sleep with me, are you?” When Ash didn’t say anything, she crossed her arms. “I should’ve known.”
“Alright, Kitty—I promise—I’ll do what I can.”
“More.”
“What?”
“Promise you’ll do more than you think you can.”
“Kitty—all I can promise—is that I’ll
try
to do more.”
“Well--I reckon that’s better than not trying at all.”
Kitty exhaled deeply, dropping her arms to her sides, only to begin flailing them. “What is it with you white people?
Why is it so important for you to be better than us?
Why do you have to demoralize us?
Why can’t we swim in your pools or go to your parks or eat in your restaurants?
Why can’t we use the same door, the same bathroom, or the same water fountain, and why can’t our schools be just as good?”
“Kitty, c’mon. Things aren’t as bad here—as they are in say—Mississippi—or Alabama.
But this is the South—and there are just certain mores that—need to stay in place.
Unfortunately, keeping the races separate is one of those things.”
“Hypocrite!
Separate except behind closed doors!”
Ash swiped sweat from his forehead. “Kitty, why are you carrying on like this?”
“Because I’m angry!”
Kitty put her hands on her hips, then defiantly thrust out her chest. Ash’s eyes immediately dropped to her breasts.
“I’ll thank you
kindly
to look at my face when I’m talking to you!”
After Ash’s eyes met hers, she continued.
“I’m angry with you—and this whole system you white people want to keep in place for no good reason!”
“Can’t we--just forget about it for now,” Ash smiled, “and concentrate on us?”
Kitty ignored his charm. “Forgetting about it’s easy for you!”
“That’s not true.”
Ash rubbed her arms gently.
“I don’t want things to be like they are for us.
But right now—there’s nothing we can do to about it.
So—can’t we just make the best of it—and love each other—no matter what?”
Ash placed his hands lightly around her waist while gazing deeply into her eyes.
Their lips touched, then melted into a slow deep kiss.
Kitty didn’t push him away.
Instead she wrapped her arms around Ash’s neck.
As her anger diminished, she kissed him with a fervor she didn’t know she had.
She pressed herself firmly against him feeling his body meld into hers.
Then Ash tightened his embrace, kissing her even more passionately than she’d kissed him.
When he pulled his lips from hers, he said softly, “Kitty, you’re about to drive me crazy.
Don’t you want me as bad as I want you?”
With her arms still around him, Kitty smiled. “Of course I do.”
She reached to kiss him again.
Afterwards she pouted.
“Oh, Ash, I wish I didn’t love you so much.
Then it would be easy to stay mad at you.”
Kitty tipped her head. “Even though I—think you kinda liked it—just a little—when I was angry.”
She smiled at the flush of his cheeks.
Ash grinned.
“Like nobody’s business.
When you were mad, it just got me more excited.
So—can we pick up where we left off?”
She looked longingly into his eyes and nodded.
“Be gentle,” she almost whispered.
“I promise.”
Ash scooped Kitty into his arms and carried her to the bed.
In moments, both were unclothed and their bodies entwined in a snug embrace.
Ash soon awakened Kitty in places she didn’t know she had, and led her to the heights of euphoric bliss.
Kitty walked into the bathroom across the hall from Aunt Izolla’s room and closed the door.
She and Ash had been intimate for over a month.
Opportunities presented themselves everywhere.
The Kroths lived in a big house with lots of rooms.
There was Ash’s room on the second floor, and the vacant live-in maid’s quarters and storage rooms on the third.
Secluded romantic havens, like the peach orchard, also availed themselves.
Kitty held her stomach as she stood over the toilet.
She’d lost track of how many days she’d been queasy, but it was always the same.
She’d feel like she was going to vomit, yet nothing happened.
But this had been a sign, and it hadn’t been the only one.
Kitty never thought she’d be happy to see the curse to arrive.
Her bleeding hadn’t started yet, but she sure wished it would.
Since she’d started menstruating at age 12, her bleeding had always arrived like clockwork.
She’d never been late.
Kitty had been to see Dr. Cutter last week, and her suspicions had been confirmed this morning when she’d called his office at 9:00 and been informed that—“the rabbit died.”
Kitty still couldn’t believe it.
She couldn’t be pregnant—just couldn’t.
But she couldn’t live in denial either.
Condoms weren’t fail proof, and whenever a woman slept with a man, there was always a chance of pregnancy, no matter what precautions were used.
She’d scheduled an appointment for this afternoon.
The doctor said it was safest to do an abortion in the first three months, so she was getting rid of it now.
But she’d at least tell Ash.
He had a right to know, and he’d be relieved by her decision.
It was Tuesday.
Miss Joan was already gone, and Kitty would be alone with Ash as soon as the gardener drove Izolla and Betty Jean to the market.
“Cat,” Aunt Izolla called through the bathroom door, “you alright?”
“Yes.”
Kitty walked from the lavatory.
“We’ll be on our way in a little while.
But you don’t look so good. You need to go home?”
“No, Aunt Izolla, I’m fine.
Just a little tired.”
“You can lie down in my room if you want.”
“I think I’ll be okay.” Kitty smiled.
“Well, you rest if you need to, honey.”
“I will, Aunt Izolla.”
****
Snapping peas at the kitchen table, Kitty jumped with a start when Ash walked in the back door.
Dressed in blue jeans and a white tee shirt, he’d been with the gardener hoeing soil in the vegetable garden.
But now the gardener was gone along with Betty Jean and Aunt Izolla.
Before he had a chance to ask, Kitty got up and poured him a glass of ice water.
“You must’ve read my mind.”
Ash smiled as she handed him the glass.
He guzzled the entire thing as Kitty slowly walked away from him.
“I thought I’d shower.” Ash put the empty glass on the counter.
“Then maybe we could--”
Kitty stood at the sink with her back to him, but suddenly turned to meet his eyes.
“Ash—I’m pregnant.”
Ash didn’t say anything.
Kitty tried to read his expression.
His mouth opened, but no words rolled smoothly from his tongue.
Ash was speechless for once, and there was a look of surprise in his eyes.
In a way, he appeared fearful and excited at the same time—if that was at all possible.
“Look, Kitty,” he finally said, walking toward her, “you don’t have to worry.
I’ll provide for you and the baby.
You have my word, as a gentleman.
And always know, that as far as I‘m concerned, you’re my wife.”
“Ash, I--”
He hugged her securely in his arms.
“Don’t worry about all the details,” he said softly.
“We’ll work everything out.
But just think, Kitty, we’re gonna have a baby.”
Pressed against him, Kitty could smell the scent of his sweat.
And although she usually reveled in the feel of his arms, Kitty didn’t return his embrace.
Instead, she pulled away slightly and looked up to him. “Ash—I--I’m getting rid of it.” Her tone was cold and unemotional.
“What?”
Ash looked like he’d been kicked in the chest.
“You heard me.”
She pulled completely from his grasp.
“I thought you’d be relieved.”
“Relieved?
Kitty—you can’t get rid of that baby!
It’s mine, too.
I’m not gonna let you kill it!”
“I’m not killing anything!
And it’s not a baby yet!”
“But what about Jeremiah 1:5?
It says, ‘Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee.’
Kitty, whoever our baby is, God knows him.
God knew him before he was even conceived.
And before he’s even born, God has a plan for him.”
“Now’s a fine time to start quoting the Bible!”
Kitty huffed, as she imagined him flipping through the Biblical section of his mental file box.
“Wish you’d thought about that
before
I got knocked up!”
“C’mon, Kitty, we’re married!”
“Not really!”
She started to cry.
“I just can’t have a baby!
What’ll Russell think?”