The Ground Rules: Undone (20 page)

“We went to the zoo,” Chloe tells me.

“I can see that,” I say as I venture a look up at Gabe who shoots me a shy smile. My heart does a little leap, despite the way we left off the last time we saw each other.

“This giraffe is going to be Tokyo’s baby,” Claire tells me.

“Cool,” I say, thrilled to see my girls so happy. It’s been a while since I’ve seen them like this.

“We should go make a zoo,” Chloe pipes up. “With all the animals I have in my room.”

Claire’s face lights up. “Yeah, that would be so awesome.”

And next thing you know, they’re both bounding up the stairs.

“Well, it’s nice to see those two getting along for a change,” I joke. “What’s your secret?”

He looks down at me with a hint of a smile.

A sudden flash of memories of our last time together take me by surprise. A short erotic film plays in my mind; his mouth against mine, his hand cupping my breast, his tongue sweeping across the letters of his name, inked on my skin.

I swallow hard. “Uh…so you had a good time?”

He smiles at me. “We did. They loved it.”

I can’t seem to peel my eyes away from him. I’m sure he notices. He shoots me a devilish smile. He knows all too well what I’m thinking about.

“Well, uh…” I stammer. “Thanks for taking them.”

“No problem.”

I smile at him again, feeling ill-at-ease. When did I become so nervous around Gabe? It’s feels like he’s a boy picking me up for our first date.

“I should get going,” he tells me.

I don’t want him to leave. “You could stay…for coffee or something.”

He laughs. “No, I should get going. And you know I only drink coffee in the morning.”

I look down at the floor. “I know. I’m being stupid.” And I wonder if he needs to be somewhere else. If he’s meeting someone else. But then I remember he told me all he wants is me.

He takes my hand in his — the gesture stuns me. “But I do want to tell you something,” he says, his words soft. “I wanted to apologize for what I said last time,” he explains, his huge hazel eyes gentle.

“It’s okay,” I tell him.

He still holds my hand when he says. “No, it’s not. It wasn’t a mistake. It did mean something. It does change things,” he goes on. “The truth is I was just so damn mad at myself for losing control.”

“I lost control too.”

He shakes his head, looking so worn out. I feel sorry for him. “We shouldn’t have…it’s so complicated between us now, Ella.”

My heart does a little cartwheel.
Yes! He’s willing to give me another chance… maybe.

I inch closer to him. “It was very special to me. It wasn’t just a quick fuck,” I whisper. “I’m glad it happened.”

“Me too,” he says. “But think about what you’re asking me, Ella? You want me to stay with you and help you raise another man’s child.”

He’s right. I’m asking too much. “I know it’s a lot to ask.”

“It’d be one thing if he was out of the picture, Ella, but he’s not. I don’t think he’ll ever be. The man’s fucking obsessed with you,” he presses on, his words filled with contempt. “And you. I think you’re in love with him too.”

I jerk back. His words have stunned me. “I…I’m not.”

“C’mon,” he says. “Can you really tell me that truthfully?”

I don’t know.

I love Weston. But it’s a different kind of love.

“We can work this out, Gabe,” I press. “I know it.” As I utter the words, they fade into the charged air, and I know that even
I
, can’t quite see how we could conceivably work this out.

He worries his lip. “I don’t want to say this, but…”

“But what?” I ask, frazzled. I know he’s about to tear me apart.

“Maybe you need to carefully consider your future, Ella. Maybe you are better off with him.”

My body suddenly feels so heavy, my head too big. I look into his eyes, and beg. “You can’t be saying this, Gabe. What about the girls?”

I can’t believe he’s giving up on us. That he won’t fight for me and the girls.

He takes me in his arms. “I’m just being realistic. I don’t want you to stay with me, if all you really want is to be with him.”

I tear myself from him. “But I don’t want him,” I cry out, the words a soft wail. “I want to be with you.”

He takes my face in his hands and wipes a tear with the pad of his thumb. “Don’t,” he says. “I still love you, Ella. I always will. But you need to seriously think about this…about what you’re doing. It’s one thing to fuck me around, but you can’t do that to the girls.”

I’m speechless. He’s so right.

His hands are still pressed against my cheeks as my tears drench his fingers. “I’m sorry,” he goes on. “But you really need to make a decision, and stick with it.”

He pulls me into another bear hug. I close my eyes and revel in the feel of him close against me.

But then, he releases me. “When I walk out the door,” he starts off but can’t quite seem to say the rest. I study his features, curious, trying to predict his next words. I know I won’t like them.

“When I walk out the door…” he repeats. “We are officially separated.”

His words destroy me. They absolutely wreck me. I think about him and Bridget, and I wonder if he wants to be with her.

“You want to be with her?”

“With who? Bridget?”

“Yes, Bridget.”

His eyes seem full of sorrow when he tells me, “I don’t want to be with Bridget,” he assures me. “I swear. It’s over.”

I believe him. I don’t know why, but I believe every word.

“This isn’t about me, Ella. This is about you. You need to figure out if you want to be with him or me,” he says, a frown pulling down the corners of his mouth. “Do what you need to do. Go to him, talk your feelings out, fuck him…but when you make your decision, you can’t go back. And either way,” he goes on, his words soft and low. “You need to tell the girls what’s going on. You can’t keep them in the dark much longer.”

I’m sobbing like crazy and he pulls me into another hug, muffling my cries against his chest. “Shh…the girls will hear you.”

I pull away and wipe my nose with the heel of my hand. I don’t want to look at him anymore. I want him to leave. “You should go.”

He stares at the floor and nods. Neither one of us says a word for the longest time. He finally lifts his gaze to mine. “I’m just giving you time, Ella. Please take it.”

He wraps his hand around the door handle and smiles at me as he leaves. “It’s not over between us,” he says as he walks away.

His last words give me hope.

I’m not giving up quite yet.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

As long as it takes.

T
he four of us girls are playing a game of Sorry. Claire’s little pout is bittersweet — Gwen’s just taken out one of her pawns.

“Sorry, sweetie. I had to do it,” Gwen tells her. “That’s why the game is called ‘Sorry’.”

Claire glares at her. Chloe, who is winning at the moment, seems rather amused. “Someone always ends up crying,” I point out. “Fun times.”

Gwen smiles at me. My best friend. My rock.

My phone chirps, off in the distance. I jump up and dash to the front entry hall where I keep my purse.

My heart sinks when I see Weston’s name.

Are u home later this afternoon?

No, Weston. Please don’t.

I really can’t deal with Weston right now. Things are finally going okay with Gabe. This is my chance to fix things. I know it seems impossible, but maybe Gabe is willing to come back to me, even with this new baby. The last thing I need is Weston seducing me and melting my resolve.

Yes…but I can’t see u. Pls understand.

-----------

I understand. I will not be there.

Gwen rolls the dice. “Who was it?” she asks. She’s always been super nosy.

“It was Weston. He wanted to know if I would be around this afternoon,” I say in hushed tones. “Didn’t say why. Rather cryptic.”

“Maybe he’s coming over,” she whispers. “Maybe I should take the girls somewhere.”

I roll my eyes. “God, please don’t.”

“Oooh…is there something you’re not telling me?”

I look over at Chloe who doesn’t seem to be paying us any attention. She’s arguing with her sister again.

I bite my lip. “Girls, stop bickering already. Why don’t I make us some lemonade? Let’s have a little break.”

“Yes,” Chloe agrees. “I’m parched,” she says, ever the drama queen.

“We should go to the park after, and pick up this game later,” I tell them as Gwen follows me to the kitchen, eager.

She takes a seat at the kitchen table. “Spill.”

I grab the can of lemonade powder mix from the cupboard. “Well,” I start. “Gabe came by the other day to pick up the girls…”

“And?” she says, at the edge of her seat. “What happened?”

I smile. “You live vicariously through me, don’t you?”

“Yes,” she says. “Now spill.”

I don’t really want to tell her, but it’s no use, she probably sees it all over my face. I lean in close. “Well, we ended up…you know,” I whisper, “…in the powder room.”

“You didn’t. You little tramp,” she says, wide-eyed. “Was it amazing?”

I close my eyes for a second, remembering. “It was. I’ve missed him so much.”

“Does this mean he’s coming back?” she asks, hopeful.

My smile fades as I tell her the hard truth. “He said it didn’t change anything at first, but then…I’m not sure.”

Her smiles fades. “I’m so sorry, Mirella.”

“And then, yesterday, Weston came over.”

She straightens up in her seat. “He did not.”

“Yes, he did. Completely surprised me. He made me a super nice mixed CD too.”

“You guys didn’t—”

“No,” I snap. “Of course not. But…”

“But what?”

“But almost.”

She lets out a huge breath. “God, Mirella. What were you thinking?”

“I know, but I made the right decision. I’m still waiting for Gabe. I know there’s still a chance for us. The way he looked at me, the way he touched me when we last spoke, so tender. I can’t explain.” I pour the lemonade mix in a glass jug. “He told me he was giving me time to figure it all out.”

“You need to be strong,” she tells me knowingly. “If Gabe is the one then you need to stick to your guns.”

“I know,” I agree. “But it’s so hard with this whole mess.”

We all enjoy a lemonade, and pick up our game of Sorry after a sweltering trip to the park. Claire is still behind and I try to not pick on her too much. I hate it when she loses, but she does need to learn you can’t win them all.

The doorbell rings and my mind jumps instantly to Weston. He better not be showing up here again. However this time, I’m safe. With Gwen and the girls here, he will surely not be able to seduce me. And following my last conversation with Gabe, I’m much stronger now. I know what I want.

When I open the door, I’m surprised to see a handsome stranger with a big friendly smile. He seems harmless enough, so I unlock the screen door.

“Hello,” he says with a slight accent. “My name is Emmanuel.”

I have no idea who this young French man is, dressed in a light khakis and a short-sleeved white shirt. He looks about thirty or so. I catch sight of the logo embroidered on the left side of his shirt:
Délices de Provence,
and it hits me. I cock a bow and ask him, “Did Weston Hanson send you?”

He smiles. “Yes. Mr. Hanson sent me to you.” Weston’s name sounds funny on his lips, without the H. “I was told to come here tonight.”

I frown a little. A phone call would have been nice. “Yes, come in.”

He offers his hand. “It is nice to meet you, Mrs. Keates. You can call me Manny.”

I smile up at him. “It’s nice to meet you too, Manny.”

The man with the boyish face and soft brown eyes stands awkwardly and smiles again. I notice he has a gap-toothed smile like me, but his gap is nowhere as big as mine.

Gwen and the girls join us in the entry hall. “This is my friend, Gwen,” I tell him, making the introductions. “She kind of lives here. And these are my daughters Chloe and Claire.”

“A pleasure to meet you, Manny,” Gwen says as she offers her hand, maybe a little too enthusiastically.

He smiles politely at her. “It is nice to meet all of you,” he says, shooting the girls a friendly smile. “I need to get my supplies from the car. I will be back.”

Gwen stares at me with a cocked brow, delighted confusion written all over her face.

“That’s the guy Weston was telling me about, the personal chef.”

She bites a mischievous smile back. “The personal chef is
hot
,” she whispers.

I laugh out loud. “You are not ogling my chef. I’ll have to send you home if you don’t behave.”

“What?” she says. “He’s very handsome, has a sexy accent and cooks too.”

I smile. “And the last time I checked…you were very married.”

“Well, didn’t stop you, did it?”

I smile at her. “Touché.”

I know she’s kidding. Although Gwen is quite man-crazy and loves to flirt, she’s completely devoted to her man. She’s a beautiful woman who knows what effect she has on the male species, and doesn’t automatically fall to pieces when an attractive man happens to pay her a little attention. No, that seems to be more
my
modus operandi.

Manny comes back with a rolling cart and a cooling unit, a crate of sauces and a myriad of other ingredients and spices. He also brings in a box of kitchen tools, some I don’t even recognize, and I do consider myself pretty seasoned when it comes to cooking.

Gwen follows his every move, her tongue practically hanging. Damn her. I specifically told her not to ogle. She makes chit-chat and he answers all her questions, just to be polite, I’m sure. He tells us we’re having Boeuf Bourignon tonight. “A good source of iron, he says, rolling the R. “Mr. Hanson says you need to keep your iron up.”

I quietly seethe.
Who does Weston think he is?
He’s so controlling. I understand this is his child, but come on.

Gwen sits up straight at the kitchen table, her generous breasts jutting out a little too enthusiastically. “I’m definitely staying for dinner.”