The Hazards of Mistletoe (10 page)

Harry looked at me, and I shook my head.

“I think you’ll have to discuss that with your date.” He glanced at me and shrugged.

“Don’t worry about it.” Going into how I could call in favors from locals required going into why I was now a local. I wasn’t sure if I was ready to do that yet.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this.” She accepted my hand as she stepped into the sleigh. I followed behind her, covering us both with a blanket while I waited for Harry to get the horses ready.

“Don’t make it sound like it’s a bad thing.”

“It’s not a bad thing, just a complicated one.”

“What’s complicated about it?” I put an arm around her without thinking.

She sat forward at first before relaxing back into my arm. Nice. Maybe I was making some progress.

“Everything is complicated. I’m sharing a blanket with you. Again.”

“I know you don’t want to talk about that night, but I enjoyed being under a blanket with you then too.”

“Stop.”

“Fine.” I wasn’t going to push my luck.

Harry got us moving, and Savy leaned into my side. “It’s a beautiful night, isn’t it?”

“Very. It’s the kind of night when I remember why I love living in the mountains so much.”

The mountain and surrounding forest were lit up by holiday lights and a sky full of stars. There was something almost magical about it, especially with the company I got to enjoy.

“I can’t imagine living here. I’d miss the ocean too much.”

“You really love the ocean more than the mountains?” I ran my hand up and down her back. Even with a down jacket separating her from me, it felt so good to have contact again.

“I do. But don’t get me wrong. It’s beautiful here.”

“At least you’re not crazy then.”

“Oh we both know I’m crazy.” She nuzzled closer. I was sure it was because of the cold, but I tried to pretend it was because she wanted to stay close.

“Oh, one more thing.” I reached into the bag I’d left with Harry and pulled out two thermoses. “Hot chocolate?”

“A sleigh ride and hot chocolate? You’re making me nervous.”

“Why?” I asked stupidly even though I already knew the answer. She was thinking of the last time I did something bordering on romantic.

She didn’t move to take the thermos. “We’re not going there.”

“We’re going to have to eventually.”

“But not tonight.” She sighed.

“Fine, but at least try the hot cocoa. It’s the good stuff.”

She accepted one of the thermoses and sipped it. “Wow, this is good.”

“Of course it is. I made it.”

“You made this?” She asked incredulously.

“Are you that surprised?”

“Yeah, actually.”

“Don’t be. I have many skills.”

She laughed. “Glad you haven’t lost your confidence.”

I had. I’d completely lost it, but being so close to her again brought it back. I could almost forget how far I’d fallen.

We rode around in silence for a while. She seemed content sipping her hot cocoa and sitting snuggled next to me. There was nowhere else I’d have rather been.

“Thanks for this.” She broke the silence.

“You’re welcome. Enjoying yourself?”

“Yeah.” She shifted beside me. “It’s pretty much perfect.”

“Does that have anything to do with the company?” I waited with baited breath.

“I don’t mind it.” She looked away and out at the snowy landscape.

“Savy?” I said her name softly.

She looked back at me, and some of her blond hair blew into her face. I brushed it away, and I couldn’t help myself. I pressed my lips against hers lightly, and I waited for her to respond. She didn’t at first, but I refused to give up. I moved my lips against hers, and eventually she started to move hers too. She opened her lips, and I took my chance.

She stilled as I first pushed my tongue into her mouth, but her surprise didn’t last for long. She reached up and tangled her hands in my hair, as I pushed her flush against me. My whole body heated, wanting her and needing her closer. I forgot about Harry as I pulled her onto my lap. An entire year of pent up desire took over, and I couldn’t control myself. I let my mouth devour hers, needing to suck up every ounce I could.

“We can’t do this.” She broke the kiss and moved off my lap.

“We just did.” I couldn’t get the goofy grin off my face.

“It shouldn’t have happened.” She brushed her gloved hand over her lips as if to brush away the remnants of me. That action was like cold water poured over my head.

“No. Don’t be like that.”

“You can’t tell me what to do. You can’t tell me how to feel.”

“I know. But I know how I feel.”

“I don’t get it.”

“You don’t get it because you won’t let me explain.”

“Tomorrow.”

“What?” I leaned closer, still trying to handle her change from hot and heavy to cold as ice.

“You can tell me tomorrow.”

“Okay.” I reached over and took her hand in mine. She didn’t pull her hand away. Brushing off my kiss or not, she had kissed me, and now she wanted to see me again. I’d stirred up something in her, and I was going to do everything in my power to make sure I didn’t let what little effect I had burn out.

Dazed. There was no better way to describe how I felt as I stepped off the sleigh in front of the condos. I’d just gone on a sleigh ride with Glen, and we’d kissed. Really kissed. I’d liked it. I’d liked the feel of his hands on me, and his lips against mine. And worst of all, I wanted more of it. I wanted more of Glen. I wanted to know everything, and I wanted there to be another explanation of why he’d rejected me the year before. I wanted there to be a chance. Because knowing there was even a small chance of getting Glen back in my life made me whole in a way I hadn’t felt in ages.

“Thanks, that was fun.” I smiled as we stood outside. My words said nothing of the emotions running through me.

“Can I walk you in?”

“I’m fine.” I wasn’t sure I could handle much more. My emotions were a mess, and I needed time to process things.

“But I want to make sure you get home safe.” His eyes were so full of emotion, and I was positive they matched mine.

“How about I text you.”

“You still have my number?”

“Yeah.” I looked away.

He took my hand. “You’re still in my phone. Of course.”

“There’s no ‘of course’ about it.”

“Yes there is.” He leaned in and brushed his lips against mine. “Good night, Savy.”

“Goodnight.” I turned and walked into the lobby. I paused in front of the large Christmas tree. I’d been in such a funk I hadn’t admired it yet that year.

“Isn’t it beautiful?” An older, gray-haired man said from his seat in front of the fire.

“It is. I love all the colors. They usually only use white lights.”

“Sometimes change is good.”

“Yeah. Sometimes it is.” I nodded. “Have a nice night.” I walked over to the elevator. What a crazy and unexpected night.

Before I could even open the door to our condo, it was yanked open. I half expected to find Dalton on the other side, but it was my dad.

“Have fun on your sleigh ride?” He didn’t even let me walk inside before starting in.

“Dalton told you everything?”

“Everything? I don’t know about that, but he told me Glen wanted some time with you.”

“Do we have any egg nog?” I pulled off my jacket and walked toward the kitchen.

“We’re not done with this conversation, but yes we do. Gina loves the stuff almost as much as you do.”

“Ok, great.” I poured myself a glass from the fridge. I hadn’t had any since the previous Christmas Eve, but I was feeling it again.

“So how was the sleigh ride? You tried to step around the question.”

“It was fine.”

“Fine? A boy takes you on a romantic outing and it’s fine? Plus this isn’t just any boy. This is Glen.”

“What does that mean? Why would Glen be any different?”

“Have a seat.” Dad sat down on the couch and gestured to the spot next to him.

“Do I have to?”

“Yes.”

I reached into my pocket for my phone. Of course it came up empty. I glanced around. “Where’s Dalton?”

“Sit, Savy.”

“But he has my phone, and I promised Glen I’d text him when I got in.”

“Where did he drop you off?” Dad asked suspiciously.

“Right outside.”

He smiled. “Ah, I see. Your phone is on your bed. Everyone else went out for ice cream.”

“Ice cream? In this weather?”

“Not everyone gets as cold as you,” Dad teased. “Go get your phone and come right back.”

As Dad had told me to expect, my phone was lying on my bed. I had a missed text from Glen.
Missed you.

I’m home, and I missed you too.

Not as much as me.

I pocketed my phone and walked back out. Leaving my dad waiting usually wasn’t a good thing.

“Let’s try this again. How was the sleigh ride?”

“I already told you it was fine.” I took a seat before he could tell me to again.

“Ok, let’s try this. How was it spending time with Glen?”

“You act like I’ve never spent time alone with him before.” I pulled my knees up to my chest.

“Why did you leave so suddenly last year?”

“I told you. I wanted time at home.”

“By yourself? I know your mom wasn’t actually there.”

“I had friends to see.”

“You usually enjoy seeing family and friends here. Particularly Glen.”

I sighed. “Get to the point, Dad.”

“I assumed it was about your mom’s engagement. It took you by surprise, and Mac didn’t handle it well.”

“He cut me out of it. Like he’s cut me out of Mom’s life whenever he could since they met.”

“You know I don’t love the guy, but I don’t actually think he means to. I get the sense he doesn’t think things through.”

“Whatever. I really don’t feel like talking about it.”

“Then let’s talk about Glen. I’m starting to wonder if he had something to do with you leaving.”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s no question you like the boy. You’ve been interested in him for years.”

“Yeah, so?” It looked like I hadn’t hidden my crush particularly well.

“So? So why did you leave? Why not spend time with him?”

“Because he didn’t want me. I misread some signs and ended up embarrassed.” I looked out the window. It was too dark to see anything but the reflection of the fire. “You happy?”

“A boy who isn’t interested in you just hired a private sleigh ride?” His voice dripped with skepticism.

I turned back. “I don’t know. Maybe he’s trying to make up for things. I couldn’t tell you.”

“You didn’t know, yet you went on the ride with him?”

“What was I supposed to do?”

“Where does all this fear come from?”

“Fear?”

“Of inadequacy. Of being rejected and getting hurt? Of letting your walls down?”

“I don’t feel that way.”

“Yes you do, and I’m starting to think it’s my fault. Mine and your mother’s.”

“Just drop it, Dad. Stop reading into things.”

“How am I supposed to do that? You’re losing weight, you’ve barely talked to me in a year, and I saw those pictures on your phone.”

“Excuse me?” I scooted away from him.

“I saw the pictures of you and that guy that was easily twenty-five years old. Why would you be spending time with someone that much older than you?”

“I’m not sleeping with him.”

“I should hope not.”

“I don’t like dating guys my age. There’s too much drama that goes with it.”

“Drama meaning that they are actually in the same world as you?”

“Just leave it alone.”

“No. I can’t leave this alone. I can’t leave it alone unless I know you’re okay.”

“I’m fine. I’m completely fine.”

“Like the sleigh ride was fine? I hate that word.”

“I thought you taught me never use the word hate?”

He raised an eyebrow. “That doesn’t mean I can’t. I want you to be happy. I want you to be willing to take risks if that’s what it takes to be happy.”

I’m not sure what happened, but it’s like the flood gates opened. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. The tears started.

Dad appeared startled at first before he gently pulled me into his arms. “You care about him a lot.”

I nodded, taking a few moments to compose myself before trying to talk through the tears. “So much. I knew I did before, and then after we kissed…” Had I just told my dad that?

“I realize you’re old enough to be kissing boys, and I’m going to pretend that’s all you’re doing. But are you saying you felt even more after?”

“Yes. But he didn’t want me. He said he didn’t think he deserved me, but I know that isn’t true.”

“Wait, I thought you didn’t ask him how he felt?”

I groaned. “Dad, you know what I mean.”

“I don’t, but I’ll pretend. Let’s jump forward. How did you feel tonight? How did it feel to spend time with him again?”

“Better than I’ve felt in ages. I feel like me around him. Like I can be myself.”

“When are you going to see him again?”

“How do you know I’m going to see him?”

“Because of the look on your face when you walked in the door. And after you texted him.”

“Is that a mistake?”

“I told you sometimes you have to take risks. This is one of those times. It’s great to play things safe, but if you don’t mix it up a little, you can’t move forward. That make sense?”

“Kind of.” I shrugged. “I’m going to call Jade.”

“That’s a friend from school?”

“Yeah. I’ll see you in the morning.” I kissed him on the cheek before walking into my room. I wasn’t ready to admit that he was probably right. About everything.

I was ready to call Jade when I looked at the clock. She was on eastern time. It was way too late. Instead I texted Glen.
How would you know you missed me more?

He replied immediately.
Because I think about you all the time.

And I don’t think about you?

I don’t know. Do you?

Yes.

You said you’d see me tomorrow. Did you mean it?

Yes.
I wasn’t chickening out.

Are you sure I can’t see you again tonight?