The Hole in the Middle (19 page)

“Indeed,” Lil mutters under her breath, and Jenny, sitting next to her, smothers a giggle.

J. SOPHIE WHELAN

To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 6, 2013, 11:02 a.m.
Subject: Re: Re: Dinner

68 Harrison Drive. Just bring yourself! Looking forward to seeing you—6:30ish.

S

Karim Assaf is seated at the table now, a striking counterpoint to Stephen Paul. He's in his early thirties and dressed to kill in a slim-cut three-piece suit and thick-framed rectangular glasses. I've seen pictures of him, of course; he's the executive director of development for the City Arts Center and enjoys a modest, local variety of fame that involves being photographed at fund-raising events by the fashion pages.

GEOFFREY DURNFORD

To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 6, 2013, 11:08 a.m.
Subject: Re: Re: Are you OK?

Let's meet after work for a drink, then. I want to see you.

G.

“. . . I'm very proud that we've increased our membership by twenty-five percent over the past two years,” says Karim. “I attribute this in large measure to our events portfolio. As you may know, we run several large-scale events each year, not unlike your Gala, and we also run a for-profit independent film festival. All of these events have had great press and brought our programs to a much wider audience than ever before . . .”

J. SOPHIE WHELAN

To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 6, 2013, 11:12 a.m.
Subject: Fwd: Re: Re: Are you OK?

Also, I'm having a little trouble managing Geoff.

“. . . first priority is going to be to put the Baxter through a branding exercise. The Baxter does outstanding work, but it doesn't work hard enough to draw the community in. In the fund-raising world these days, it's not enough to have a worthy cause—saving sick children in your case, which is as worthy as they come—you have to market yourself so that people think it's hip to be associated with you. That's what we did very effectively at the CAC, and you can do it too. But you are going to need to invest in your public image and also in your events program to draw people in. I'd like to see you with a much busier social calendar, but of course, that will take more than one hundred days to put into place.”

ZOE HENNESSY

To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 6, 2013, 11:22 a.m.
Subject: Re: Fwd: Re: Re: Are you OK?

If I give you my advice, will you follow it?

“. . . it will be very important to me to be present in the details as we move toward a fund-raising program that is more events-based. My practice is to treat every event with the care and attention that I would give to a party at my own home. I insist on having the final sign-off on all aspects of the event—menus, flowers, seating arrangements, entertainment—the works. It's the only way to insure that the brand is consistent . . .”

As I consider my response to Zoe, I realize that there is a worse fate imaginable than serving as director of communications for Stephen Paul, which is to become shackled to an operation whose major function is to churn out events trumpeting the global significance and essential coolness of Karim Assaf. It occurs to me that this could be the right time in my life to join the opt-out revolution, to thumb my nose at Barry and Stephen and Karim and the daycare director, to stay home and devote myself to raising better men than the ones I work with every day. In the meantime, though, I need Zoe's help.

J. SOPHIE WHELAN

To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 6, 2013, 11:37 a.m.
Subject: Re: Re: Fwd: Re: Re: Are you OK?

I promise.

“. . . any pitch to a prospective donor is going to be closely linked to the Baxter's brand. For example, I wouldn't want to jump the gun and commit to a donor strategy without having the data from an impact study. I also think, incidentally, that your question highlights an antiquated approach to fund-raising that I would like to change. There is a place for face-to-face meetings, yes, but social media is changing the way we communicate with our supporters. I am a big proponent of using Facebook and Twitter to link with our donors. This approach, combined with a regular series of invitations to events, will insure that your donors regard you as a friend in their network, and not just a faceless entity with its hand out.”

ZOE HENNESSY

To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 6, 2013, 11:46 a.m.
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Fwd: Re: Re: Are you OK?

DO NOT ENGAGE. NOTHING GOOD CAN COME OF IT. IGNORE HIS EMAIL. DO NOT MEET HIM FOR DRINKS. YOUR LIFE IS COMPLICATED ENOUGH RIGHT NOW.

P.S. I disinvited Richard from your party tonight.

“I want to thank you for bringing such a refreshing perspective to these issues,” says Barry. “Would you like to take the opportunity to make a closing statement?”

“Indeed I would,” says Karim. He straightens in his seat. “The Baxter is an integral part of the fabric of our city. For almost one hundred years, it has nurtured our children. But the world of philanthropy is changing and the Baxter is being left behind. It's time for a paradigm shift.” Barry nods vigorously in the background. “I want to help redefine the Baxter as an organization of the moment. I want our events to be the must-attend highlights of the social calendar. I want to associate our brand more closely with celebrity spokespeople. The Baxter's image should be fun, youthful, and glamorous.” He pauses for effect. “Once we have a new look and feel, I think you will be amazed at how quickly the dollars flow in!”

“Splendid!” Barry says. “Well, I'm sure I speak for all of us when I say that you have given us a call to action, Karim. Some very important ideas for us to think about, and I thank you for that. We will be in touch shortly.”

Karim leaves, and Barry says to the table, “Well, no one could dispute the return on investment for this committee so far. We have a front runner and a strong fallback in case we can't meet Stephen's salary expectations—not bad for a morning's work.” He smiles. “Let's get the last one over with and wrap this up.”

friday, december 6, 2013

I take advantage of the pause to check in on the personal drama unfolding on my BlackBerry, and discover, as I feared, that the more I try to contain the situation with Geoff, the further it spins out of control.

GEOFFREY DURNFORD

To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 6, 2013, 12:05 p.m.
Subject: Thinking of you

I haven't heard back from you. I'd like to continue our conversation. What time will your meeting end?

I remind myself that Zoe's advice, which I have sworn to heed, is undoubtedly right. I can't have a scene with an employee over a rash and totally unprovoked declaration of affection, and certainly not over e-mail. It's better to take the indirect approach and let him down easily. And anyway, I feel sorry for Geoff. He has no way of knowing that he's sixteen years too late to audition for the leading male role in my road-not-taken fantasy. This thought calls to mind, in thrilling detail,
the dream sequence that I've committed to excising from my consciousness. I remind myself, very sternly, of the many excellent qualities of my devoted and utterly attractive husband, take another slug of disgusting coffee, and turn my attention to the door, which swishes open to admit the next candidate.

At first glance, Margaret Anderson is the furthest thing from striking, with pale, doughy skin and an unruly mop of graying hair. She is, charitably speaking, stout, and I know in my sinking heart that nothing Margaret is going to say will be able to sway Barry. It is a terrible fate to be a plain woman. But as Margaret takes her seat and surveys the group around the table, something amazing happens: she smiles. And Margaret Anderson has a smile that transforms her in a second from forgettable to magnetic. Everyone turns toward her like flowers opening to the sun, and there is a moment of silence, broken by the sound of Barry choking on a mouthful of water.

Margaret launches in, and within moments she is creaming the competition with her fund-raising experience and her plans for the Baxter. My shoulders relax as I realize that she doesn't need my help. I've only met two other people who could command a room like this. One is grinning far too widely at the end of the table, and the other . . .
damn.
I'm thinking about him naked again.

JESSE WALKER

To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 6, 2013, 12:26 p.m.
Subject: Dinner

Don't forget that Anya is sensitive to dairy and garlic.

J. SOPHIE WHELAN

To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 6, 2013, 12:35 p.m.
Subject: Re: Dinner

Wouldn't dream of it.

GEOFFREY DURNFORD

To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 6, 2013, 12:40 p.m.
Subject: Are you avoiding me?

Jenny catches my eye and mimics a typing motion with her thumbs. I drop the BlackBerry into my lap, fold my hands on the table, and pay strict attention as Margaret explains her strategy for donor engagement. I don't think of Will once.

“Thank you,” says Barry. “Those are all of our questions. At this stage in the process, we invite you to make a closing statement.”

“Not quite all of the questions, I think,” says a voice at the end of the table. Barry looks up, a warning in his eyes.

“Ms. Anderson,” says Lil, “I understand that you are a single mother. This has been a matter of some . . . concern to certain members of our committee. It is my understanding that some members of the committee are worried about your ability to participate in evening events as a result of your parenting responsibilities. I thought you might wish to have an opportunity to respond to the concern directly.”

“You are not required to answer that question,” Barry sputters. “It is highly inappropriate.”

“On the contrary,” says Margaret. “I'm delighted to answer that question. I always think it is preferable to have people ask than to have them wonder and draw conclusions without information. I am a single mother of a fourteen-year-old son. And for many years, I have had a very elaborate set of arrangements that allow me to work demanding jobs and still raise my son. Primarily, I rely on my mother, who lives with me, and who has been an active partner in my parenting. The fact that I am a single mother has never affected my ability to attend events, or to discharge any of my responsibilities to my donors or my employer. I do think that it has made me a more compassionate manager.”

“Thank you, Ms. Anderson,” says Barry severely. “That is all for today. We will be in touch.”

“Would you like to make a closing statement of some kind?” asks Jenny.

“Certainly,” says Margaret. “The Baxter has some remarkable strengths, and it should be at the forefront of donors' minds in this city. The fact that this is not the case suggests to me that your major gift program has been neglected over the past few years. I think it's quite common for organizations like this one to overinvest in events. Events can bring the existing community together, but they don't replace the important work of meeting with donors and persuading them to support the life-saving health care that takes place here. This is what I do best, and I think it's a good fit for what you need. I believe deeply in the work that the Baxter does, and I'd love to be part of it.”

Jenny shows Margaret out, and the rest of us settle in for what is obviously going to be a long meeting. Barry is whispering furiously to Carl at one end of the table, while Carolyn and Marvin are in a huddle by the coffee station. Lil sits slightly apart from the group, looking queenly. “All right, everyone,” says Jenny, as she resumes her seat. “I'll facilitate the discussion. Let's deal with the strengths and weaknesses of each candidate first, and then we'll deal with them comparatively.”

“I'll begin,” says Barry. “In my opinion, we were incredibly fortunate to have attracted Stephen Paul in the first place. He is by far the most qualified candidate, in terms of professional experience and stature. He's just what we need: tough, strategic, and business-minded.”

“I couldn't agree more,” says Carl. “His focus on strategic planning is clearly well-placed, and his vision is realistic and achievable.”

“With respect,” says Marvin, “I don't believe that I heard him articulate a vision. I think he said that he'd rather not do that without engaging in some kind of process first.” He looks at Carolyn. “What process was it? Stakeholding?”

“Stakeholdering, I believe,” says Carolyn. “I don't mind telling you that I didn't understand a word that man was saying. It was complete gibberish.”

“I agree,” says Lil. “I question the wisdom of having as our lead fund-raiser someone who uses the word ‘actionable' when he means ‘able to be done.' ‘Actionable' means ‘giving rise to legal action,' for heaven's sake. The man's routine butchery of the English language might actually get us embroiled in a lawsuit.”

Carl bursts out laughing. “You can't be serious. Give the man a break. I didn't know the meaning of ‘actionable' until just now either.”

Lil sniffs. “Your ignorance is nothing to celebrate,” she says.

“Let's talk for a moment about his professional experience,” says Jenny. “No one is disputing the fact that Mr. Paul has had a lengthy career in senior business roles. But are people confident that his specific experience is relevant for the position here?”

“I can't say that I am,” says Anusha. “I've been thinking about what Sophie said in our last meeting—that fund-raising organizations are different from charitable foundations. I didn't hear Stephen say anything that persuaded me that he knew how to run a fund-raising department.”

“I can assure you that it's not rocket science,” says Barry, giving the Blowfish a workout at the end of the table. “If he can run a public company, he won't have any difficulty running our fund-raising operation. And I think we should be very careful about how influenced we are by Sophie's opinions on the subject. She is hardly a fund-raising expert herself, and her views are basically hearsay. In a court of law, you wouldn't be able to consider that evidence at all.”

I consider Barry's florid complexion, hear his braying voice ringing in my ears, and am overtaken with unhealthy fantasies of revenge—Barry falling down an elevator shaft, Barry being hit by a bus, Barry being arrested for investor fraud—before I remember that actual retribution is within reach. I don't have to work here. I have a job offer. I could stand up right now, walk out for the last time as an employee, and walk back in as someone with clout and influence: a funder. The prospect of reversing the balance of power with Barry is delicious. So what's stopping me?

“Happily, this isn't a court of law, and in the context of the search committee, Sophie's views as a staff member in the advancement department are considered relevant and useful,” says Jenny coldly. “The very reason that we require search committees to have staff representation is so we can have access to direct information about how specific departments work.”

Patti has been silent throughout the meeting, but now says, “I feel compelled to mention that we have two equity candidates and that Stephen Paul
is not one of them. If we end up hiring an older white male, we are going to have to be convinced that he is far and away the best person for the job. I'm not hearing people say that so far. Why don't we talk about the others and come back to Stephen?”

“Exactly,” says Jenny. “What are people's views on Karim Assaf?”

“Very impressive,” says the female board member, whose name I still haven't figured out. “I've been to several events at the CAC since he took over, and they've been terrific. He's got a tremendous vision for where he wants to take this organization.”

“But is it where we want to go?” asks Marvin. “We need to raise large amounts of money for pretty pedestrian things like staff positions and equipment. We are very different from an arts organization. Listening to Mr. Assaf made me wonder if his experience is easily transferable.”

“I think your concerns are overstated, Marvin,” says Carl. “We raise a lot of money from our Gala every year.”

“That's true,” I say. “But we don't raise anywhere near as much money from our Gala as we raise from our other fund-raising efforts. Events are a pretty inefficient way to fundraise. They cost a lot, and they consume huge amounts of staff time. I personally wouldn't want to see us do a lot more events.”

“Of course, Sophie is biased,” Barry interjects. “She's supervising the Gala at the moment, somewhat against her wishes.”

“Isn't that all the more reason to take her views into account?” asks Carolyn. “I'm also concerned that Mr. Assaf is too junior in his career for a move like this. I don't think he has the experience to build our major gift program. Our average donor is well over sixty years old. In my opinion, Margaret Anderson is far and away the most suitable candidate. She has ten years of relevant experience and her fund-raising plan makes sense. And I could understand the words she used.”

“I agree,” says Marvin. “I thought she seemed like a terrific person. Lots of positive energy and ideas, a very pleasing personality. I think our donors will like dealing with her, and she'll be able to talk to the medical staff.”

Barry looks shocked. “No one is suggesting that she isn't nice. She's
obviously nice. But nice isn't going to bring in the bucks! We need someone who is prepared to look our donors in the eye and shake them down. You need someone who knows how to make a deal. Stephen is clearly the front-runner on that score.”

“Speaking as a donor,” says Lil, “I think that the shakedown strategy is overrated. I'd much rather deal with someone who can make a rational case for why my assistance is needed than someone who tries to bully me into it. I'd much rather take Margaret Anderson's calls than Stephen Paul's.”

“Is this about ‘equity'?” says Barry. “Because if you are turning down one of the leading business figures in the country because he's a white male, it is political correctness run wild. And anyway, it's not at all clear to me that a woman should be given special ‘equity' consideration. It's not as though there are no women in management here.”

“I'd like to point out that you are the one who was prepared to disqualify Ms. Anderson on the basis of her family status,” says Lil. “But to answer your question, no, this is not about equity. It might be if I thought the candidates were close on other measures. I don't.”

“I don't think we're giving enough consideration to Mr. Assaf,” says the female board member. “He's young, dynamic, and he wants to put the hospital on the map. If he can do for us what he did for the CAC, we'll be bringing in tons of new donors.”

“I didn't hear him say that his major gift program showed any signs of increasing,” I say. “He threw a bunch of great parties, and he managed to get a bunch of new members—but they offered discounted ticket prices to members, so the increase to the bottom line is probably negligible.”