The Last Days of Jack Sparks (3 page)

BOOK: The Last Days of Jack Sparks
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Bitterly cold winds sail up and down the aisle as Father Di Stefano, Translator Tony and I literally pull up a pew for a chat. We have time to kill before the subject of the priest’s latest ritual arrives.

Exorcism can be traced back through millennia to the dawn of civilisation. Right from the word go, man was all too keen to ascribe sickness, whether physical or psychological, to evil spirits. And of course people from the ancient Babylonian priests onwards were all too keen to present themselves as exorcists. As saviours. The most famous was allegedly Jesus Christ, who couldn’t get enough of it.

Di Stefano considers exorcism more vital than ever in the online age. ‘The internet,’ he tells me via Tony, ‘has made it much easier to share information, but not always good information. People experiment with Ouija boards and get themselves in trouble. And then they call us, asking for help.’

This man has the lived-in face and manner of a mastiff dog. There is not the faintest flicker of humour in his dark eyes. He is barely tolerating me. His aides hover within earshot, which always irritates me during interviews. I ask for them to move further away, but the request is rudely ignored. I soon discover that Di Stefano’s hearing is poor when he wants it to be – when I ask a challenging question, for instance. At other times, when I say something he wants to pounce on, his ears sharpen the hell up.

Di Stefano has granted a fair few interviews over the years – most notably when he’s had a new book out – but as far as I can tell, no journalist has been allowed to watch him perform an exorcism. Today feels like a concession to the modern media, a canny PR exercise: if the Church is seen to be helping people, it stays relevant in the eyes of the world. And if there’s one thing religion should be worried about these days, it’s relevance. There’s no question that converting Jack Sparks would be quite the coup.

I can’t help but picture Di Stefano conducting an exorcism with an entirely straight face, then bursting into uncontrollable fits later on, the moment he shuts his front door behind him. Just
hooting
at the nonsense he gets away with on a daily basis. But there’s undoubtedly a very serious side to all this. After all, Di Stefano deals with often quite severely distressed people of all ages (except babies, seemingly. Babies are so consistently insane that it’s hard to tell if they’re possessed, unless they start floating about). The lion’s share of these people arguably suffer from some form of mental illness, or have experienced abuse.

‘That is true,’ allows Di Stefano, to my surprise. ‘Very often we realise, you know, that a person does have a mental illness or there is some other history there. In those cases, a demon is not to blame after all. When this happens, of course, the person will be sent for the correct treatment. The need for an exorcism is actually very rare.’

‘How can you tell when an exorcism is required?’ I ask.

Di Stefano looks down his nose at me, regarding me like the rank amateur I am. His stare is unyielding, those eyes dead as a cod’s. ‘You get to know the sign of a true demonic possession,’ he says. ‘You can feel it. The feeling is completely different.’

So far, so vague. ‘How
exactly
does it feel when it’s a real demon?’ I persist.

‘The air feels . . . thick,’ he says, with distaste. ‘And black, like oil. It is . . .’ He rubs his forefinger and thumb together as he searches for the word. Then he exchanges rapid-fire Italian with Tony, who provides the word on the tip of Di Stefano’s tongue: ‘Oppressive.’

‘Also,’ the priest continues, ‘you can see it in the subject’s eyes. The eyes, you know, are the windows to the soul. You can see who, or what, is living inside.’

‘How do you know it isn’t all in
your
head?’ I ask.

That mastiff face crumples. No mean feat when your face is already a sponsored crumple-thon. He doesn’t enjoy this line of questioning, no doubt because it could just as easily be applied to religion as a whole. Still, he gamely indulges me. ‘As far as I know, I am perfectly sane. So are my exorcist colleagues. The things we have seen . . . the way people have behaved with demons within them . . . this is no make-believe.’ He gestures around the church. ‘You will see today, I think.’

‘Have you seen
The Exorcist
?’ I ask.

‘The movie? A long time ago. I don’t remember too much about—’

‘Are exorcisms anything like that?’

‘Sometimes they are,’ he says wearily. As if anticipating my next question, he adds, ‘But you know, exorcism existed for a long time before that movie. The movie took its cue from exorcisms before it. But I must say, I have seen things far more terrible in real life.’

I lean forward, quote-hungry. ‘Could you give me an example?’

Di Stefano recalls a middle-aged single mother in Florence who would cry blood. Her skin turned sickly green and broke out in open sores. When he tried to expel her demons in an attic room, she whispered the Lord’s Prayer backwards as she gouged out one of her own eyeballs with a rusty antique spoon. Di Stefano (then a mere assistant, in the late seventies) and his exorcism instructor restrained her, encased the eye in ice and rushed her to hospital. Despite a five-hour emergency operation, the eyeball could not be reinstated. Still, Di Stefano claims that they eventually exorcised the demon from this woman, who was reunited with her children.

When pushed for his very worst memory, he reluctantly dredges up the 2009 case of a ten-year-old boy in Milan. As he speaks of this boy, his full-bodied voice becomes little more than a murmur.

‘The first time I tried to exorcise him, he laughed in my face, as he broke each of his fingers one by one.’

‘Just the fingers on one hand?’ I ask, genuinely curious. ‘He couldn’t do both, right?’

Di Stefano glares at me, as if I’m trying to be funny.

He bows his head. ‘I could not save him. The demons had such a firm hold. I think they wanted to make a point, to scare me away from my life’s mission. During exorcism number three, the boy smashed his face against the corner of a glass table, blood everywhere. In number five, he threatened my nieces’ lives. He said he would cut all the skin from their faces as I watched, then force me to eat it.’

Translator Tony pops a square of nicotine gum into his mouth.

Di Stefano takes a moment to compose himself. ‘Two nights later, I had one of my visions.’

Ah yes, Di Stefano’s famous visions. His books are full of them. These visions physically root him to the spot and flood his mind with astonishing psychic sights. Interestingly, he rarely seems to tell anyone about them
before
their real-life counterparts occur. Why, it’s almost as if he pretends to have had the vision in retrospect.

‘In my mind, I saw the boy murder his sleeping stepfather with a hammer, then jump out of the window. And this actually happened, thirty minutes later. The boy, he jumped ten floors down to the busy road. Such a terrible, terrible . . . People said he screamed blasphemy as he fell.’

Satisfied that I can’t come back with a smart answer to such a grim story – or worried that I might ask for more information about that stepfather – he stands, ending our cosy chat. He needs, he says, to pray and mentally prepare.

As I leave him to kneel before the altar, I wonder how many exorcisms actually take place in churches. Aren’t the possessed supposed to burn up when they walk through the door, or at least protest and writhe around? Have these people never seen
The Omen
?

I open my notepad and review the SPOOKS List I’ve created . . .

THE SPOOKS LIST (Sparks’ Permanently Ongoing Overview of Kooky Shit) (Full disclosure: I had to ask social media’s hive mind to help with the ‘K’ word. Prior to that I only had ‘Kreepy’, which simply wasn’t good enough.)

People claim to have witnessed supernatural phenomena for the following reasons:

(1)    They’re trying to deceive others

(2)    They’ve been deceived by others

 

Those, then, are the only two
viable
explanations as I see them, in top-down order from most to least likely. It won’t surprise you to learn that I don’t consider ‘Ghosts are real’ to be a viable hypothesis. Neither can I entertain the notion that people can be deceived by their own minds to the extent that they ‘see’ a ghost. Not without the use of LSD, anyway, and in such cases the drug is clearly the mother of total delusion. I should know this better than most, after the incident with the dive-bombing spider-geese.
2

What I’ll be looking to do, both here today and throughout this book, is to fit everything I see to one of the two explanations above. Should neither of them fit, I’ll potentially add a third explanation to the list.

That’s highly unlikely, I’m saying, but let’s get stuck in.

Thirteen-year-old Maria Corvi arrives on foot, alongside her fifty-something mother Maddelena. The frigid Halloween air converts their breath to vapour. They live somewhere off in all those forbidding woods, which offer few helpful footpaths. During the last hour and a half of my drive out here, I saw neither towns nor villages – just the occasional run-down cottage or cabin set far back from recklessly winding dirt roads. If this little church ever served a bustling community, then such a thing has long since dissolved.

At first sight Maria doesn’t strike me as demonic. Neither is she all cute-as-a-button smiley like Linda Blair’s
Exorcist
character Regan MacNeil, who was one year younger. Maria Corvi radiates the sullen nonchalance of your typical teenager who’s doing her best to mask fear. Look closer and you see that, like her mother, Maria is quietly desperate. The pair are decked out in the same plain, practical blue smocks and boots they wear for their work as farm labourers. Maria is pretty and worryingly thin. Gaunt, too, and those dark-ringed eyes suggest sleepless nights. Her unwashed black hair hangs halfway down her back.

Apart from a splash of grey up top, Maddelena is so self-evidently Maria’s mother that they could be nesting Russian dolls.

I watch Maria carefully as she crosses the threshold into the church. Her flesh does not burn and she does not shriek. She does, however, bring a hand up to her throat and swallow hard, as if resisting the urge to be sick. Catching my eye awkwardly, almost shyly, she looks away and continues with her mother towards Di Stefano as if nothing has happened.

The priest greets Maria and Maddelena by launching into a formal speech in Italian. It reminds me of company reps who read legal tedium over the phone, while you play Candy Crush and say ‘Yes’ every thirty seconds. It very clearly reconfirms, no doubt partly for my information, that Maria and her mother have agreed to this rite. The Church, stresses Di Stefano, would only force such a thing on someone if they had harmed others or were deemed to be at risk of doing so.

‘Please do not be afraid,’ he tells the women. ‘Today, Maria, you will be free of the negativity that has no business within you.’ I later learn that ‘negativity’ is a euphemism the Church often employs. They claim it helps to avoid leading the subject through the power of suggestion. Which seems unusually sensible of them.

Maria nods, her expression neutral. I can’t tell whether she believes in this stuff, or is going through the motions for her mother’s sake. Did Maddelena find an Ozzy Osbourne album on Maria’s iPod and hurriedly dial the Vatican’s 1-800-DEVILCHILD hotline?

Di Stefano briefly explains why I’m present. Then he leads Maria to the strip of dusty floor that passes in front of the altar. Her mother signs legal papers handed to her by Beard (oh yes, legal papers – the Church likes being sued about as much as any other multinational corporation). Then he and Beardless usher her, along with me and Translator Tony, to our designated pew five rows back from the front.

Maddelena chews what’s left of her fingernails while Tony translates her. ‘I know this has to be done. But . . . she is my baby, you know? I do not understand. Why has Satan chosen her?’

It doesn’t seem the right time to tell her Satan doesn’t exist. Or indeed to ask if, you know, Maria might just be your average teenager who seems a bit nuts – especially against the backdrop of a quiet rural expanse like this. Instead, I ask what led Maddelena to hire an exorcist.

‘Maria started to sleepwalk,’ she says, never taking her eyes off her daughter as Di Stefano gives the girl a final briefing in hushed tones. ‘Or at least I thought she was sleepwalking. In the middle of the night I found her standing outside our home, at the edge of the clearing . . .’

Maddelena flicks her eyes around the church before continuing. ‘She was naked, in the freezing cold. I thought she was asleep, so I said to her, “Maria, please wake up.” But she turned her head, with her eyes wide open. And she smiled. I’d never seen a crazy smile on her face like that. She said to me, “I
am
awake.” And then . . .’

Maddelena looks set to cry, but steels herself. When she lowers her voice, Translator Tony follows suit. ‘
And then
. . . she slapped my face and said, “
You
wake up, you Christ-loving whore, before I rip out your fucking heart.”’

After that night, Maria’s nocturnal wanderings escalated. Maddelena claims she tried locking both of the house’s external doors and hiding the keys, but still her daughter managed to break out. One time, Maddelena and a search party of friends found Maria a mile away from home, in the dead of night. She was writhing around, naked again, covered in the blood of a deer that she’d slain with a butcher’s knife taken from the kitchen.

‘She was laughing when we found her,’ says Maddelena with a shudder. ‘After that, I felt so lost. I knew that only the Church could help with something like this. The old pastor who owns this church helped me make contact with Father Di Stefano in Rome. The good father sent an assistant to meet Maria, then it was decided that a blessing would be best.’

Another euphemism, there. It’s so much easier to agree to a blessing than an exorcism. When I ask if Maddelena ever considered medical help for her daughter, her face suggests that she trusts doctors and science about as much as I trust priests and religion.

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