The Look of Love (12 page)

“Oh, alright
then!” Chrissy said in exasperation. “His name’s Adam Campbell and
I’m seeing him again tomorrow night. Okay?”

“How old is
he?” her mother asked.

“Thirty-nine.”

“Thirty-nine!
That’s twice your age! He’s old enough to be your father!”

“Oh, mum!”

Then her father
asked, “What does he do?”

“I don’t know,”
Chrissy replied, slightly annoyed with herself for failing to ask.
She promised herself that she would rectify that on their next
date.

“But he must do
something!” her father pressed her.

Chrissy thought
for a moment, and then she said, rather enigmatically, “He breaks
little girl’s dreams.”

Victoria sat
bolt upright in bed. The sudden movement was ill advised, and she
swayed slightly and clutched at her head with one hand and at her
stomach with the other. There was a banging in her head and a deep
ache in her stomach. The ache eased as she lay back down again, but
the banging continued. It was a moment before she realised that the
banging was real. She had a headache alright, but the banging was
outside her head, not inside. It seemed to be coming from somewhere
below her. She looked around and realised that this wasn’t her flat
in the hall of residences.

She sat up
again; more gingerly this time, threw back the covers and sat on
the side of the bed. The banging seemed to have stopped at last.
She looked down and found herself wearing a pink cotton nightie
with a Disney character smiling up at her. She turned her head
slightly so that she could see it the right way up. It was a very
cute rabbit.

The door opened
and Louise came in. The movement surprised Victoria and she looked
scared as she dived back into bed and covered herself up. Only when
she saw that it was Louise did her expression soften, and she
sighed with relief.

“Oh, it’s you!”
she exclaimed. “I couldn’t think where I was for the moment.”

“Sorry! I
didn’t mean to scare you,” Louise said, coming to sit next to her
on the side of the bed. She smiled at Victoria and reached out to
brush her tangled hair. “I’m glad to see you’re awake at last, I
was beginning to get worried.”

Victoria
glanced around the room. “How did I get here?”

“I brought you
home last night. You were in a right state. How do you feel
now?”

“Terrible!”
Victoria moaned. She rubbed her stomach again. “My tummy and my
head feel very sore. And my back aches. It’s not usually this bad
after a binge. Even my face aches. I feel like I’ve been hit by a
bus.”

“I don’t think
this was any ordinary binge, not even for you!” Louise said with a
smile. “I suppose you don’t remember being beaten up?”

Victoria stared
up at her and shook her head. Louise took a mirror from the
dressing table and handed it to her. Victoria stared at her bruised
face, her mouth open in shock. Her right eye and nose were heavily
bruised, there was a bright red scratch down her cheek, and her lip
was split. The general colour scheme was purple, green and yellow
for the bruises, red for the wounds, and pale white for everything
else.

“Oh, bollocks!”
she exclaimed. “I’ve really done it this time.” She dived under the
covers and pulled up her nightie to check her stomach. Louise knew
when she found the bruises when Victoria gasped, “Oh, Jesus…”

“It could have
been worse,” Louise said, and told Victoria how she found her in
the toilets and had to rescue her with the fire extinguisher.

Victoria
grinned, then hastily grabbed her split lip, uttering an, “Ow!”
before adding, “I wish I’d seen that! I bet you froze their tits
off!”

They both
laughed, and then Louise asked tentatively, “Do you remember
anything else about last night?”

Victoria
swallowed and looked thoughtful. “Not much. I never do, really. I
remember some of the stuff from early in the night. Meeting at the
bar, Jo’s boyfriend, seeing you…” Victoria’s voice trailed off and
she suddenly looked very upset. “I didn’t get into a fight with
Chrissy, did I?” she asked anxiously. “Oh, no! Don’t tell me I had
a fight with Chrissy! She’ll never forgive me!”

Not being able
to remember everything that happened the night before, and even
being beaten up, hadn’t seemed to bother Victoria that much. But
the possibility that her friendship with Chrissy might have come to
an end did bother her. As more of the details of the previous night
came back to her, Victoria got more and more emotional, and she
began to cry. But it wasn’t just a few tears; it was really heavy,
wailing, baby stuff. It surprised and worried Louise, who quickly
put her arms around Victoria and did her best to comfort her.

“Chrissy will
forgive you, I’m sure she will!” Louise tried to convince her.

“No, she
won’t!” Victoria insisted between sobs. “She said horrible things
to me! I remember now!”

“But you were
both drunk! You probably said things that you didn’t really
mean!”

“Chrissy
wouldn’t say those things if she didn’t mean them! I’ve known her
since I was three, and I know! She hates me! And it’s all my
fault!”

“She doesn’t
hate you! She was just upset, that’s all!”

“But it was my
last chance!” Victoria wailed. “She told me so! And she told me to
behave! But I never can! I can’t help it!”

“She’ll forgive
you! Just explain everything to her!”

“No she won’t!
It’s not fair! I hate myself! I’m so
stupid
!”

Victoria became
angry and she began to pull violently at her own hair. Louise
quickly grabbed her hands and stopped her.

“Stop that!”
Louise shouted in such a stern voice that it made Victoria jump.
“Stop blaming yourself! Yes, you were drunk! You did some stupid
things, and Chrissy has a right to be angry with you! But if you’ve
been friends for as long as you say you have, then I’m sure she
will forgive you. Now stop crying! You’ll see Chrissy on Monday in
class, and you can tell her then that you’re sorry. Tell her you
got beaten up. She’ll forgive you, I’m sure she will.”

Victoria seemed
to calm down at last, but she still wasn’t convinced. “But you
don’t know her,” she muttered with a sniffle, rubbing her face.
“She can be really hard!”

“I’ve only
known Chrissy for a short time, but she seems sensible enough to
me. I’m sure she will listen to you. She’s probably just as upset
as you are. So stop worrying.”

“Will you talk
to her for me?” Victoria suddenly asked, grabbing hold of Louise.
“She’ll listen to you! You explain what happened! I’ll say I’m
sorry! I promise I will! But if you talk to her first, I’m sure it
will help! Please, Louise! Please!”

Louise stared
at Victoria’s earnest and appealing expression and couldn’t refuse.
She wiped the last of the tears from Victoria’s face and said
softly, “Of course I will.”

“Thanks!”
Victoria said with a grin. Then she seemed to forget everything as
another thought entered her head. “What time is it?” she asked in
sudden alarm, and grabbed hold of Louise’s wrist. Victoria twisted
her head round to get a better view of Louise’s watch. “Half past
two! Bloody hell!” she exclaimed in annoyance. “The days half gone!
And I was supposed to be packing this morning!”

“Packing? Why?”
Louise asked, totally surprised by the change of subject and
mood.

“Oh, that
pigging warden at the residences reported me to the University for
what happened last week,” Victoria said, talking quickly. She began
to move her feet back and forth under the covers as she spoke,
watching the little mounds they made moving about. “They weren’t
too happy about my drunken binges and the effect it might have on
the other students. They were very polite and all that, but
basically they told me to sod off and that I had to move out this
weekend. I haven’t even found another flat yet. Were we alone last
night?”

The question
caught Louise by surprise. “Er, yes,” she said hesitantly before
quickly going on. “Where were you going to stay?”

Victoria
shrugged. The movement caused her pain and she flexed her shoulders
gingerly. “I’ll doss at Zach’s place until I find somewhere. He
won’t chuck me out of bed.”

“You can stay
here,” Louise said almost too quickly.

“What?”

“I have a flat
with two bedrooms,” Louise explained. “This one is the spare room.
It’s always empty. You need a flat and someone with notes to use to
catch up with. I could do with a little help with the rent, and I
get a bit lonely on my own. It’s a perfect arrangement.”

Victoria was
completely surprised by the idea. “Are you sure? You hardly know
me, Louise.”

“After last
night, I think I know you pretty well.” Louise almost blushed as
she spoke. She hoped Victoria didn’t notice.

“And even after
last night, you still want to share?”

“Yes!
Definitely!”

Louise couldn’t
hide her enthusiasm. For her the very idea of sharing a flat with
Victoria was a dream come true. It was a dream she had often had in
the past, but on those occasions she had always been disappointed.
The girls she had liked had faded away just like the dream, and she
had begun to think that this day would never actually come. And now
here it was. And this time it was going to be different. After last
night, Louise couldn’t even bear to think about rejection. Her love
making with Victoria had been far more exciting and pleasurable
than anything she could ever have imagined. Victoria had to say
yes, she just had to.

Victoria didn’t
have to think about it for long. She looked around at the room and
nodded her head. “Yes. Okay, Louise. Why not? It would do me good
to have someone sensible around. Someone who can get me to classes
on time, and who can tell me off when I’m getting out of control.
But be warned!” she held up her finger. “They don’t call me Tori
Canyon for nothing you know. You’ve seen the results when I wreck.
Not just last night, but my flat last week. The fall out can be
awful, and I can be a real pain in the arse. I don’t mean it. It’s
just the way I am. So if at any time you get sick of me, if I trash
the place, or get you into trouble, just chuck me out. I’ll
understand. Okay?”

Louise couldn’t
care less if Victoria trashed the place right now. She nodded and
smiled. “Okay.”

“Right, then!”
Victoria threw back the covers and got out of bed. “I better get
up. I haven’t packed any of my stuff yet. But if I’m going to move
in, I want to get it all over with today.”

“I’ll help you,
don’t worry!” Louise said, standing up. She was ecstatic.

Victoria looked
around. “Where are my clothes?”

“Ah!” Louise
said. “They’re in the washing machine.”

Victoria stared
at her. “But what am I going to wear?”

“I’ll lend you
something. Come and have a look in my wardrobe.” Louise led the way
into her bedroom. “I don’t think your outfit from last night would
have been so suitable in the day time anyway!” she remarked on the
way.

Victoria
followed Louise into her bedroom and looked around. Somehow it felt
familiar. “That’s true,” she said thoughtfully. “But it wouldn’t
have been the first time that I went home in the morning looking a
right prat!”

Louise laughed
as she opened her wardrobe. She took out a pair of jeans and a
light blue sweater. “You’re a bit taller than me, but I’m a bit
bigger, so these jeans will be a bit baggy, but they will probably
fit you.” She turned to find Victoria standing in front of her. She
wasn’t smiling.

“Are you sure
we were alone last night?” Victoria asked Louise.

The smile faded
from Louise’s face. “Yes,” she replied simply.

“Did you
undress me and put me to bed?”

Louise felt her
heart pass her stomach on its way to her feet. She swallowed
nervously. “Yes.”

“Was it
you?”

This was it. It
was all over. The bubble was about to burst and there was nothing
Louise could do to avoid it. Her shoulders sagged and she sighed as
she admitted, “Yes.”

The banging
noise started again and Victoria looked down at the floor. “What’s
that banging?” she asked Louise.

“Oh, that’s
just Rosie smacking their toaster,” Louise said forlornly.

Victoria stared
at her in obvious puzzlement.

“It doesn’t
switch off when it’s supposed to unless you hit it just right,”
Louise explained.

There was a
louder bang, and then silence.

“That must have
got it!” Louise said, smiling rather hopefully.

“How often does
that happen?”

“Only when
they’re having toast.”

Victoria
sighed. “That figures!” She took the jeans and sweater Louise was
holding and stared at her for a moment. “I guess this means that
you had better wait outside while I get dressed.”

Detective
Sergeant John Connors walked down the alley with a uniformed
officer. He had receding dark hair that was already going grey, and
he was slightly overweight. He put his weight down to the unsocial
hours and too many pub lunches. But it was only an excuse. Eating
was his last and only vice. At forty-nine, he was divorced and
lonely, and at that age in his job when promotion or pension become
very close runners.

Connors had
been a police officer since he was eighteen, long before the
constable walking beside him had been born, and he was beginning to
get tired of it all. There were too many dead bodies, too many
horror stories. And no matter what the crime statistics might say,
it always seemed to be getting worse. He was getting to the end of
his race, and his superiors knew it. He had been passed over for
promotion once too often, but in a way it suited him. The only
exercise he took was mental exercise, and if he ever got trapped
behind a desk he knew that he wouldn’t last long.